Hi Keeping Faith,
First, I just want to say that I hope you are not doing all of this for this reason......In order to succeed you MUST be doing this for YOU.
That being said, these feelings are extremely normal. I am 38 years old, way out of high school and college, and I can't wait for my ex-husband to see me once I get my figure and my life back. He basically divorced me because I couldn't lose my baby weight after 4 years of struggling. He stopped our physical relationship 2 years ago, saying that he was not attracted to me anymore. Six weeks after we separated he had a girlfriend from Match.com.
So, while I am doing all of this for my self, my health and my three kids, there is a small part of me that cannot wait for him to see me once I am back in fighting shape. And I pray he finally understands even a fraction of the pain I have dealt w/ after his repeated rejection, and is sorry.
Keep your head up and stay focused on your goal. When the time comes, you will hopefully meet someone who deserves you. Forget the other guy, but enjoy the double takes and second glances, you earned them!!!!
-FindingMeAgain