maestrita

His own statements are what damned him as far as communicating with me goes. I don't hate him or love to hate him or anything of the sort. He had offended me and some others, I gathered, by being very aggressive on another post. He expressed that he doesn't get along with women. I find that type of statement to be discriminatory and just as unacceptable if a person were to say that he doesn't get along with African-Americans or Asians. It really struck me as "you people" sort of thing to say. I am glad that I learned how to block his posts because that's not what I came here for. I don't enjoy having to defend myself. I came here for support, and I had just hoped to get ready for my surgery consult without having to deal with any nonsense.

Thanks, Coach and welcome. It's true about some of the border cities. They can be VERY rough. I don't think that is true of all of Mexico, though. Having lived in Guadalajara and traveled extensively by myself throughout the southern states, I think the border cities give us an uncharacteristic view of the Mexican people and their culture, don't you? For example, I won't go to Tj, but I never felt cause to be overly concerned about my safety in Jalisco or Michoacan. A person can receive excellent medical care in Mexico, sometimes better than we provide here, but it is not guaranteed, and you have NO legal recourse like you have here. I think, though, our original poster is Canadian, am I right? As a Canadian, you would still have legal recourse under our system to hold a doc accountable if you choose to have surgery in the US...but it's costly....

Thank you, Kiz. That's what I was hoping to hear about. I wouldn't have anticipated that the port would ever be near the bra line, but now I will know to ask.

Yes, you don't care so much that you wrote a book to respond. I don't care if you think I am a snob. You have the manners of a camel. Just leave me alone. I suggest that everyone who objects to be talked to with the tone you use, immediately and permanently stop communications with you.

Dan, This is not the response I am looking for. I know I am paying for this, even if I were going to go through my insurance, I pay for that, too. In fact, I pay in excess of 15,000.00 a year in insurance premiums, and I remind providers of that when necessary. My disposition is appropriately respectful toward these professionals, and I would expect the same of the clients I serve, as well. I've asked you not to correspond with me. I don't want your less than humble opinion. You are downright rude, and you would not be one of my clients....ever. If I talked to people the way you do, I'd be afraid to ask that same person to operate on me. I have done my "research," (it would appear that we've developed a rather lose use of this term) and as such don't have a lot of questions to which I don't have the answers already. It is interesting that there is an assumption by someone who is not even banded that perhaps I haven't done my homework. I am a school teacher. That's what Maestra means, BTW. Thanks, Forggin. I am interested in finding out if there are things that people wish they'd asked that they hadn't. I had written down that I'd like to ask why he chose to go into this area of specialization in order to get a better sense of his personality. That is important for me, too. I realize, too, that once I am under, it more the responsibility of the anesthesia doc than it is the primary surgeon as to whether or not I come back. I wish I could chat with her, too before the surgery day.

Bummer about the liquid part....I don't have to do that. I have to go low carb to shrink my liver, but no liquid requirement. I will have to do it for 10 days, and the part that sucks the most is that I have an out of town trip just three days into the diet. I am going to a conference, and I will be there with everyone else from work who will want a glass of wine and good food:sneaky:. I know I have to do this, though. I have to. I can't manage these illnesses any longer, and I don't want to. I am ready to treat food just like what it is and nothing more. I can't wait til March 10....!

You're right. You can decide who you are going to be. All the same, I would appreciate it if you would avoid any communication with me in the years, yes years, to come. I don't find your lack of compassion for others refreshingly honest. I find it boorish and damaging. If you'll recall, you started this thread. You weren't asked to coddle anyone. You are just trying to be hurtful, and nobody asked you. Besides, you seem to have stated that you have a sexist disposition toward women, and I find that just as deplorable as racism. We've all been judged considerably in our lives by people who don't understand the difficulties of obesity. I don't need any more of that from you. Please don't respond to my posts, and I will avoid yours, as well. Good day.

Dan2001xj, You say that your intent is not to offend, but your posts read as very confrontational. It sounds as if you are attempting to discredit everyone who might not agree with you. I am not banded yet, and you can look at my stats, but it won't tell you that I attended my seminar almost two years ago. I learned my insurance would not cover the costs, and I've worked very hard to be able to finance my surgery. Likely, you would have lumped me into the short term group, though. Being on this site does not represent the total "research" one might do. It behooves all of us to read the medical journal literature about the band, either before or after you are banded. Chatting/posting is helpful, but it is not research. Moreover, do I think I've learned a ton more because my journey was a total pain in the A? No. I don't. I learned most of what I know within two weeks of the first seminar I went to. The weight was just harder than it needed to be, especially since I've had to struggle with two weight related illnesses the whole two years, and there was no benefit to waiting like that. None. I will likely have times where I feel like I don't want the band, and times of discouragement. I'd like to think that during those moments I could come to this forum without worrying about being judged. Hint, hint.

I am going with Doctor Kirshenbaum in Denver for just under 10,000.00 (US). His fills are just 15.00 after the first three months, too. I've lived in Mexico, and I think the medical care is good in most places. However, once you cross borders, you have a whole other set of liability and accountability issues that you have to deal with. Mexico does not have the same rigorous monitoring of their medical practices as we have in the US, and from what I remember of having lived in Canada as a teen. Don't get me wrong...there are some places that are very well monitored. It's just that it's not that way everywhere. Also, I am not sure what the rate of exchange is. I think the dollar is close to the loonie now, am I right? I hope you find a resource that will work for you. Good luck.

Yeah, really, compared to Twist Ties, the Twisties can't be nearly as bad! Glad I made you chuckle, that was my hope. Sorry if it hurt your port, though....:thumbup:

They are soybeans. Good for you, too. They're high in protein, antioxidants, and natural estrogens.

Like the others said, it probably depends on the person as far as the physical limitations of the band go. Emotionally, I feel like I don't want to eat just anything. I will be banded next month, and I feel like I don't want to put bad things in my body. I don't think that the healthier choices taste as good as the fattening foods, but this is just something I have to accept. I really had a hard time coming to that realization, but a friend of mine put it this way. "You won't do drugs, no matter how good they might feel because you know they will hurt you. Eating like this is also hurting you." I hated her for about two weeks, but she's right. She's right. Eating to please myself is what got me in trouble in the first place. I had lied to myself about the portion sizes because I felt like, and still feel like, the actual types of food I eat are healthy. No fried foods, no super sized anything, no real mayo, etc. It's just that, for me, I can eat several pieces of whole wheat bread, drink 30 oz of low-fat milk....I am hoping that the band will help me reign it in some as far as that goes.

OMG, I thought you meant Twist Ties like those little plastic things that you use to tie up the bread bag. I thought, oh hell no, I am not getting this band if it makes you do crazy things like eating plastic pieces! Glad to know that it was just some chips. Sounds like you'll be fine.

It worries me because I've had similar experiences with other diets before, and I am not yet banded. What worked for me, in those instances, was to rotate my calorie intake. I can cut down to 1000 calories a day, and my body will just readjust to burn only that many calories. I have to trick my body into burning by doing one week at a higher calorie intake and one week much lower. I, too, have a sleep disorder, and I know the fatigue you are talking about. It's hard. I wish I could offer you encouragement...I hope I am. I heard someone else mention the 5 day pouch test... I don't know if any of that would help, but you did go through a lot so far. Perhaps feeling sweet is just around the corner, and all you need is some minor changes in the process. I certainly hope so. Good luck to you. Please keep us posted!

I think it really is just your age. It is fairly common for women not to enjoy sex physically or have drive until they are older. It will likely get better in a couple of years. I don't know about obesity being a factor because I was HOT when I was your age, and I really wasn't all that into it either. I mean, the intimacy was the big part of it for me. The physical stuff just happens a little later for us. I didn't really have much mojo until I was about 27, or so.

I don't think you should give up. I do know, however, that some folks have had to wait up to 6 months and jump through all manner of hoops in order to get insurance to pay. I am scheduled for self pay, but I have still appealed. If they approve before I go in, I will let them pay for it. If not, I will put it on a credit card. In my case, the insurance company would not accept an appeal from the doctor. I had to write the appeal. I can include a statement from my doctor, but only once the appeal process advances another two steps to the in-person appeal. I do agree that you might consider looking for another doctor, though. You will need to use this office for the aftercare for years to come. If she is difficult, you might be somewhat "married" to a difficult person for a long time. It is harder to find a doc who will care for you if another doc did your surgery. Hang in there. This is tough. If you do choose another doc, I'd write a letter to the one you're leaving and tell him why. I hate to think of a good doc being taken out of the rotation just because he has poor help up front. He might not even know...

You are cracking me up Avanderhoof! Yeah, my husband wasn't at all concerned about anything else. His cousin was banded, and he saw that everything went well. He said it was fine with him if I was hot again. He was kind of joking about the implants, but I know in the back of his mind, he's worried that I won't be hot if I lose my boobs. I have to say, since it's been just about the only physical feature I was ever super proud of, there is a small worry in the back of my mind, too. It's not enough to deter me, though. I have health issues that MUST be resolved through weight loss and soon.

I know this is going to sound silly, but I am going through a Mardi Gras type of phase where I feel like I really need to eat anything and everything I might miss after I am banded next month. What do you miss the most? What do you wish you had gotten one last bite of that you can't really have now?

Oh, yeah. I totally agree about the NEVER thing. It's not healthy emotionally, and it's not realistic. I don't think of obesity as being a character flaw. Here's my .02 on the American diet. I think that we are asked to deal with a problem that is multidimensional and is far too complex to be blamed on an individual. If it weren't, all of those attempts at weight loss that we tried before would have worked. For example, the introduction of food sources to groups who have developed different genetic patterns is one factor. Some of us are genetically wired to eat deer meat and acorn mush--not McD's. I think having lived through/being raised by folks who lived through the Great Depression is another factor. This generation quite literally watched their countrymen starve to death, and responsibly taught us to not "waste" food. I think the "bigger is better" notion of our culture contributed greatly to the increased portion sizes. The fast food industry is documented to have had significant impact on the increase in portion sizes, starting with that one restaurant that begins with a W, and through competition spreading to the others. The trend rippled through our lives until even in the school cafeteria, we were taught to over eat. No wonder we don't feel full. We were taught not to. Another issue, despite the claims of the recent advertising campaign they've launched, is the use of corn syrup. It's true that it is no different than sugar, nutritionally. The problem is that it was added to EVERYTHING, and since it didn't just say SUGAR on the label, people were unaware for a long time that their salad dressing had added sugar. I can go on, and likely some will hope that I don't. My point in all of this is that we don't have to blame ourselves for this. It's bigger than we are. I hope any of you who happen across this thread is able to put the guilt down and leave it. Another aspect of our culture is that we value independence. The downside of that is that we are sometimes tricked into taking personal responsibility for a problem that, as in this case, is system wide. Here's to finally having a little help in beating that system! I can't wait until March 10!

I think you and I just have different personalities, or maybe it's my sense of humor that doesn't come across. I don't have any guilt whatsoever. I also don't intend to engage in eating habits that I've usually avoided once I have the band. I plan on making an even stronger effort to only eat foods that will make me stronger once I am banded. Mostly, that has been my pattern all along, but I have eaten way too much. For example, I haven't eaten "real" mayo in years. I drink non-fat milk, use spray butter, etc. Likely, I've been in denial about portion sizes and just kind of felt sorry for myself that I've (IMHO) made good food choices and worked out hard (I made qualifying time on a two mile run just a couple of years back), but am still struggling with being overweight. About the Last Supper thing...It's just kind of funny to me that once I realized that this was a done deal, I decided on one last hurrah.

Thanks you guys. I'm really not blue. I am kind of laughing about it, actually. I have not really allowed myself to eat stuff like "real" candy or those forbidden foods for many, many years. My weight gain has related to overeating, but it has usually been healthier foods. Not that it makes a difference, though. My BMI is around 36, and I have the disabling health problems nonetheless. I guess I feel like I have struggled with the urges, fighting them daily for so long. Now that things are going to change, maybe I can just relax for a minute and have that Milky Way bar. I think dinner tonight will be a Malibu and Coke, some uncooked bread, some popcorn, and a grilled chicken salad. I will enjoy these on your behalf, and when I'm on the flip-side, I'll feel like I've said my last goodbyes properly.:thumbdown:

Of all the things out there...seriously?? cheese?? I guess we all have our weaknesses, but....cheese?? I'm teasing, but I feel your pain, though. It's a big decision, and it's scary. You know what gives me hope, though, is that so many people can look you straight in the eye and say they'd do it again in a heartbeat. I think I've come to the right conclusion.

My husband is supportive, but he wants to know how we are going to pay for the breast implants if it should happen that my girls go away. I have to admit, I am a little concerned about that part, too.

I am not banded yet, but I will be soon. I have lost hair during two other weight loss attempts, when taking birth control, and after the births of both of my children, so I also worry about what will happen after the band. I have very thick hair, so most folks never knew. Then again, I never even got close to losing so much I'd need a wig and mine never came out in clumps. It was stand by strand, falling in the sink when I blew my hair dry, extra stuff in the drain trap, and on the floor of the bathroom. Every other day or so, a fallen piece would droop down in my face or tickle my neck, and I would just lift it off and throw it away. Though nobody really noticed, I knew, and that was hard. It was more weird than anything else. It just felt wrong... like my body was trying to tell me something was not OK. It nagged at me in the back of my mind like I was wrong to try to lose weight or maybe I was sick somehow. Perhaps with proper supplementation and the support of a nutritionist, I won't have that symptom this time...dunno. I kind of know some tricks to deal with it, though. Short hair, layered hair, or curly hair looks fuller and healthier. I used root booster always, and did not use any shine products or conditioners that weighted my hair down. With oilier/heavier products, it looks thinner. At it's worst, I found a product that was like a perm that doesn't give you curls (you don't use rods at all). I don't know what it was called, but it did give me lift.

That's too funny!