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Now for the stupid question...does it matter what size band you have. I read my op report and I have a 10cm/4cc band. when I read the fill posts, people talk about having 5cc to 7cc fills. I realize that the restriction is based upon the size of the stomach opening, but I worry about being able to get enough restriction. VERY stupid, but it doesn't stop my head from worrying about failure. I have only lost 5 pounds in 3 weeks, but I can pull my comfy jeans off without unbuttoning them. So I get to move down 2 sizes from a Lane bryant size 4 to a size 2. I haven't ordered them, I am afraid that they will be too tight and then I will get discouraged. Okay, I am an idiot.

Steph, does Michael have an IEP or 504 plan? If so, you go in and tell them 'what for'. If not, get him one!! then tell them 'what for'. I know that as a teacher/parent we seem to have to fight more for our children to be treated fairly. When Elyse (my 22 yr. old) was in 7th grade, she was failing math. I requested that she be tested and was told that I just needed to accept that she was a 'C' student. I finally talked the school psyc to test her under the table and 'what a surprise' she had a learning disability. I hate to admit it, but the squeeky wheel get the attention, so go in there and squeeky. As a school, we have eliminated all 'incentive' type activities. I wasn't thrilled to take the student who 'mooned' the class when I had a sub on our last field trip, but I just made sure he wasn't in my 'group'. Unfortunately, it sounds like Michael is dealing with adolescent feelings along with his ADHD. Elyse also struggles with depression (family history) and the doctors did not want to put her on presciption anti-depressants. We ended up putting her on St. John's Wort, it really helped. Now that she is 22, she is on prescription anti-depressants, which is working even better. Does Michael have someone to talk to other than family or teachers? When Elyse qualified for Vocational Rehab 1 1/2 yrs ago, they paid for her to go to a councelor and work on her social anxiety issues. Just a thought. I know that there is nothing harder than seeing your child in pain, especially this type. Okay topic change...I think there was something in the air yesterday...I battled with hunger ALL day. I did well until my mother called to complain about the lift chair that she ASKED me to find and order for my dad. Then I ate another FF Fudge bar, and finally ate a bowl of oatmeal. I figured the oatmeal was better than the Cookies and milk calling my name. If she moves in with me when dad dies, I SWEAR I am moving to an uninhabited island!!!! On a positive note, dad finally acknowledged that it was a good thing his oncologist put him in rehab, other wise he said he was going home to die. Now he is feeling stronger and that he actually thinks he will live for a while. Denise, what can we say...hang in there. Karri, I understand your pain.

Calories today...1060...not to bad since I had a stick and had to move back to mushies for the day. Dinner was higher in calories than normal...Smashed tuna, avocado, mandarine oranges, 1 tbl. of low fat miracle whip. So okay for today.

Karri, glad you joined us!!! I am keeping positive thoughts to 'attract' (the secret) donations. Actually, a coworker, who I don't really get along with donated $50. Now I feel bad. I did survive my lunch sticking, just bairly. I didn't get it back up, and couldn't get it down. Now I know the band is there! I am going to move back to mushies for the rest of today AND remember to chew!!! Six weeks on liquids and you forget to chew. I just hope I didn't damage anything. Phil, congratulations on the 'large'. I haven't seen a large for so long...AND the quilt is beautiful!! McDonalds, what's that, oh I remember long long ago, okay 6 weeks ago, but at least I haven't been craving french fries. I survived the chocolate dipped cookie test today. A huge tin was in the lounge (shortbread with dark or white chocolate, my fav) and I didn't eat any!! I did take the empty tin at the end of the day for quilting projects. Steph, you have to be careful, do you need a ticket for over doing it? I know how you feel though, I hate it when I can't do what needs to be done, I HATE asking for help. I am suppose to start my summer job this weekend. I usually start in March and work 7 days a week until schools out and then 4 days a week until September. I am in charge of all the roses and water features at a nursery. I don't know if I have what it takes to work 7 days a week right now. Physically I can do it, its the mental part. Oh well, that's life.

Quilt..........what Quilt.................where's the quilt????????? On a different note I need an answer, Almost called Steph, but since I couldn't talk, it wouldn't of helped, not good to cry in front of students either, but.. Okay, class full of students during lunch, phone rings, mouth full with bite of soft food, swallow fast w/o chew. Commence pain, severe pain, tearssssss, you name it.. So the question is: force it down or force it up or sit in pain until it goes away? K

Okay, I am better today. I walked 3 miles... Also today is my first day of soft food, I am a little nervous, here is the plan...baked salmon, sweet potatoe and a little veggie couscous. I changed my Breakfast to only 1/2 cup skim with my oatmeal, whey powder, SF syrup. I still hate oatmeal, but I tell myself it is good for me and if keeps me full. Then moved on to SF Jello for snack, Mock lasagna from the mushie recipe (1/2 lowfat cottage cheese, 1/2 cup marinara, 1/4c low fat mozerella), string chees for a snack before my walk. I feel good, yesterday was a nightmare. Back from dinner, I had the '1st bite' pain again, waited, and after 5 minutes it quit. Ate about 2 oz of salmon and 1/2 c sweet potatoe, one bite of veggie couscous. Felt full, so I quit. With my before bed time snack, FF fudge bar (50 cals) my gross calories is 948 and net calories 613. So I am still under, but don't want to push it. I am full right now, and a little sore. So if I could only stay this way everyday, things would be great.

How can I be good one day and eat the world the next? Monday, my calories must have been to low, because on Tuesday I was starving...I also took my students on a Field trip, so the stress was high. My calories for Monday where 761, but my calories for Tuesday were 1883. So I guess I get a ticket:sad:. I didn't get a chance to walk, other than following students around for the day. Didn't get home from work until almost 7pm, I just love 12 hour days, and then to my quilting group. I haven't been for months, mainly because I am embarressed to go, too fat. My new walking shoes came yesterday, so now I can walk without my feet killing me!!! Good job Steph, but remember, you can support and encourage DH, but you can't do it for him. You all are in my thoughts & prayers, it is hard when we have to watch our family downward spiral. Have a good day, and good 'food' day!!

Ladies, I almost feel virtuous...AND I actually had an 'I am full moment' today. Breakfast: Oatmeal, skim milk, whey protein, SF maple syrup 285 cals SF Jello 20 cals Lunch: 1/2 c FF refried beans, T salsa, 0.5 oz Shred Cheese 190cals AND I walked home from work...3 miles in one hour!! Feet are tender, new shoes should be home tomorrow!! AND I lost a pound since Wednesday!!! WHOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! No ticket for me today!!!! BUT I couldn't have done it without all of you, and your great recipes!! Also, I found a great place for bariatic recipes and they also sell a large variety of SF products. BariatricEating.com - BE, Inc. The number one bariatric website for protein, vitamins, and success. Let's hope tomorrow goes as well as today.

Today was a good day, calories are well within range, and I did 2 hours of heavy yard work. The sun is like a drug for me. I would have done more but 'incisions were starting hurt, so I figured I better quit. Made some sugar free jello for this week and I am learning to eat oatmeal which I add protein powder, skim milk, and sugar free maple syrup (Steph thanks for syrup idea). I ate a little to much for lunch (3pm) but calories were with in range. My weakness is my coffee, Internation coffee: Cafe vienna. I have 2 cups a day at 140 cals, I need to cut it down to one. I can live with one and figure something out for the other. How do you all do the no water during a meal? I get so thirsty, so doctor recommendations is to suck on ice cubes? I understand the no water during/after a meal after a fill. Gosh, maybe I am just trying to find ways around things. I am sorry that I am such high maintenance.

Quilting projects...which one....well I am ALMOST done with a wholecloth hand quilted queen size. It is a wedding gift for my daughter who got married 2 Augusts ago. I am hoping to get is done before her 2 year anniversary. I also hand-piece and quilt baby quilts, what we call 'promise quilting'. I have enough for each of my 5 daughters' first babies. However, I have yet to get a grandchild. I have a queen size log cabin quilt that I have been working on for 11 years. I am finishing up the quilting on it. I ALSO have a scrap quilt, that while all the fabrics are from the same medley, the techniques for each 'block' are different. Everytime I learn a new technique I use it to make part of the quilt, applique, embroidery, stenciling, paper piecing, foundation quilting. It is my 'diary' quilt. I also make jewelry, rugs, purses/bags (fabric & felted), wool hats, knit, embroidery, woodworking, some clay work. So ladies, tell me it gets easier. I hope that this all gets easier when I get a fill. Right now this seems an impossible journey. I know you all did it, but tell me you all whined a little. Right now I feel like I am a huge baby. I hate whining, but everything seems to be so hard. I do remind myself that I paid $7000 for this privilege to feel this way. Head hungry, well, it has always been my head that causes me problems. I probably wouldn't have passed the psych eval. Okay I am at an all time low. I will go drink some Water. I have had only 32 oz of water today....

kirajh, here are some links to the accelerated nursing programs general info Registered Nurse Career programs Accelerated BSN | Find Programs from All Nursing Schools one of the online programs available Undergraduate : Accelerated Online Nursing Program : University of Wisconsin Oshkosh College of Nursing Hope this is helpful, also, tell your daughter to do an internet search on: 'Accelerated BSN programs' k

Dang, I was so excited, using the dailyplate, I calculated my daily calories to loose 2 pounds per week, and it said I could have over 1900 cals per day. Well...I checked my profile and it said that I was a male...so once I changed it to female, I can have about 1600 cals. I would like to know how it takes 300 extra calories to pack around an extra appendage. I would think that OUR extra appendages should take at least 500 cal since they are larger. It must be the ego that goes with the appendage.

Okay folks...do I get to go with my 'net' calories, subtracting the number of calories I burned while I walked 2.5 miles? Please say Yes,,,if so then my total calories for the day will be...904!! With 80 g of protein...and so far 40 oz. of water. If not then my total for the day will be...1214, still not too shabby since I can not eat many veggies right now. Do I pass, or do I get a ticket? Karri, as it has been said...VENT. You always have our shoulder.. Steph, hows the water going.. Oh and I did buy oatmeal and SF maple syrup for breakfast. I want you all to know I detest oatmeal, had it everyday of my life growing up. My sister made it and it was ALWAYS like glue. But I am going to give it a shot. Dad update...talked to rehab people and they said they will probably keep him for 3 weeks. For the next 2 weeks he can not lift his left arm because of the pacemaker, so they plan on keeping him an extra week. They said he is progressing and his spirits are good.

Okay folks, I did a miscalculations on my breakfast protein shake... Somehow I calculated the yogurt & sk. milk at 1 cup EACH instead of about 3/4 c ALL together,, so the REAL calorie cost is 250. Much better than 400!!! YES I will walk home tonight after school. k

OMGosh...I went to the dailyplate and calculated the calories in my breakfast protein drink that I make. I need to rename it...my 1/2 daily calorie allotment. It has 400 calories and 55 carbs...I know it is all 'good' food choices, but dang the caloreis and carbs snuck in there. So from now on, I need to look at either having half or eating something else.

Steph, you ARE a trophy and don't you think otherwise!!! Going to try some walking today!! We will see how far I get. Think of me at school today, trapped inside with my FAVORITE student who 'mooned' the class when I had a sub AND shouted penis during the class period while I was with my dad. Plus I get the privilage of having him for 2 periods in the afternoon. Thanks for the support about finding a new career. I did a little research last night and they have an accelerated nursing program that people with bachelors in another field can complete. It takes about 12 months. I am going to look into it. I am slow to change and I like routine. I need to decide if this is just a mid-life crisis, hit 50 last month, or if I am really unhappy. It bares repeating...you all are the most wonderful people. You have been my rock, my sounding board, and I couldn't have done this without you!!! By the way, instead of cookies last night I had a fat free schwan's fudge bar. I am going to have to figure out a variety of legal 'sweets', I seem to be craving it in the evening. You all have a great day, it is Friday and I don't have to go any where this weekend. MAYBE I will get some quilting done!!!! or even better (but just barely) some gardening done. My daffies are blooming and I haven't even had time to go sniff them. Denise, again, go with your friends on the trip. Get recharged!! Karri, keep working to find the balance!! dang I better go get ready for work...I'd rather chat! K

Janet, thanks for the mushie direction!! It has been an hour and I am still a little sore. Denise, GO on the trip, get some away time, you are going to need. k

I LOVE the idea of the Tickets!!!! Let's go for it.. Okay folks I need some help. as I said before, I am suppose to move directly to solids from liquids. I decided to transitions to mushies after doing a lot of reading on the internet. So tonight I tried some chicken & veggies. I got about 4 SMALL bites, with chew,chew,chew AND it hurt like hell. I had to quit. So now I sit, too afraid to eat anything. The liquids aren't keeping me full, so I thought some mushies. I didn't think I would have any problems until I got a fill. So NOW what do I do????

Steph...on the space after a period, I use to teach keyboarding a few years back and the new rule is...1 space after a period. Some business efficiency person figured out how much it was costing to pay someone to press the space bar twice, so to safe money the rule was changed to 1 space after a period. For the most part, either way is acceptable as long as you are consistant through out the document. Well, let me tell you about the girl scout cookies...they were a kind I hate but the girls like, so I figured I was safe. I was still under 1000 calories for the day, which is why I think I had problems. I hadn't had time to buy groceries when I got home so dinner was VERY lame. Puraed (sp) soup. So I got out my diatitions (sp..damn I can't spell today, hope you all can interpret) instructions and...I am suppose to go from full liquids DIRECTLY TO SOLIDS, no mushies at all. I am suppose to go to solids on Monday, I am going to modify a bit and throw mushies in there. I can't imagine what will happen to my digestion if I go directly to solids. I have lost the 2 pounds I gained, so that is good, especially since I spent the last 6 days sitting at the hospital. So, now it is time to start walking. I usually can only lose weight when I walk. I also think I found a simple elliptical machine for about $350. I am going with the Ironman, it doesn't have a lot of bells & wistles, but the machine itself is studier than most. I do have to figure out what I am going to do at school. I know it is stress. Anyway, you all have a good one. k

Karri, I TOTALLY understand that 'at school' food issues. When I am at home, no problem, at school..if it resembles food I eat it. I know that is going to be my challenge. Fortunately we are heading into summer, so I can get some food issues worked out before fall. That or I need to find another career. I am checking into some options, now that I will be an empty nester I am not sure if teaching is what I want to do for the rest of my life. YEP I am in the throws of a midlife crisis. The students have changed so much, I just don't know if I can adapt, or even if I want to. I am checking into going into to nursing. Strange I know, but I have alway been interested. The question...can a 50 year old go back to school and then get a job at 53ish???? That or I just need to find that cabin in the wilderness and become a recluse, I have thought about that also. Except my mother would find me and try to move in. So who knows what the next stage of my life will be. But Karri don't give in to the stress, you are too good for that. Indi..very impressive, you give me hope!! I don't think I weighed under 140 when I was born..actually I was pretty scraunny (sp) when I was born, mom smoked throughout her pregnancy. I step on the scale when I go back to school today. Don't own a scale at home and haven't decided whether I want one. So we will see if I have a loss or gain. I have been doing okay, but Molly (the baby doxi) woke up in the middle of the night to go potty and I put girl scout cookies in milk and ate them. What was I thinking, okay what I was thinking was that, DAMN they tasted good. I need to get back off the carbs. Well, off to get ready for school and see how the sub did.

Steph, I am going to vote with Janet...but I also understand the food issues. I did fairly well until driving home from Billings to Florence. I was feeling bad that I left dad and then the roads got icy and it went down hill from there. The only good thing was that I went for the 300 cal DOVE bar instead of the 1500 pint of B&J's. Stupid thing was that when I was half way through I didn't want it anymore, but ate it anyway. I know I don't have restriction but at least I am starting to hear my full signal. I don't always listen, but at least I hear it now, so tomorrow will be a new day. We got dad into the rehab in the same hospital that he has been in. Toured the facility and talked to the people, it looks good. They want dad to wear real clothes and he will dine with the other rehab patients instead of in bed. The hard part was leaving. I finally saw my dad as a tired sick man with no hair and no muscle. He has always been the 6'5" muscle man with Elvis hair. He didn't want to do rehab, so I talked to the doctor and he didn't give dad a choice and focused on how good dad would feel afterwards. I had to tell a few fibs about the rehab. One of my daughters is a PA at a Heart Institute and when dad asked about what she thought about the rehab, I said that she insists that her pacemaker patients get rehab. God will probably strike me down, but I am hoping that I will be forgiven. Finally asked some of the hard questions...how long does dad have before the lung cancer takes him. Doctor says dad has a 25% chance of making 5 years and that the average patient makes 30 months. I know dad will make less than that, but I only pray that it will go fast at the end, at which time I lost it and bawled like a baby. I had to hide out before I could go back into the room. Dad is not a canidate for another round of Chemo & radiation, but they are putting him in a clinical study for an experiemental drug, he will have a 50/50 chance of getting the drug. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. I couldn't have made it without all of you. Reading all of your posts kept me sane. AND I can't wait to meet you all in September!!

Dad is out of surgery and finally in his room, the 2 hour procedure ended up taking 7, but all is well. Food choices, 3/4 c berry protein drink, 1 160cal yogurt, 2 c soup broth, med ice tea,1 c skim milk, water. Being trapped in the hospital has limited my choices, so while I have had to eat cafeteria food, I think I did okay. maybe someday I will find the right balance. I have ALWAYS had no problem NOT eating anything OR eating everything. My problem is finding the balance. Elyse picked up a diet book for her nutrition class, called The Skinny, it is very interesting and has some nice recipes. It focuses more on portion control, putting fruits & veggies with every meal and not denying anything, but putting things in balance. So between lapband and other ideas I know I will make it. Yep I will.

hello everyone, dad is in getting his pacemaker, it has been a couple of hours and could be a couple more. The are going to destroy the nerve that makes his heart beat because it is out of control. The pacemaker will run his heart from now on. Talked with the onocologist and he agrees that dad needs to go to rehab for at least 2 weeks, so today we meet with the social worker to start the paperwork and get him into a place. Please give prayers that there is a spot available to in this hospital. Dad likes it here and I like the looks of the place, so IF there is a bed available we should be able to get him in tomorrow. With him in rehab for 2 weeks, I will head home tomorrow, and then we will all take turns with his care when he gets out. Our goal and the doctor's is to get him home strong enought to be able to move around on his own. Good food choices, about 3/4 c of protein smoothie this morning, I am trying to push the water more and I am really looking forward to being able to walk, my body feels like it is going to decay. Incisions healing great and only the port site is a little tender, and I do mean little. anyway, thanks everyone for the prayers and thoughts, k

We finally got dad out of bed for the first time since Tuesday, THEY say it was because his blood count was too low, and may be so. Pacemaker procedure tomorrow morning, Onocologist will be by tomorrow and I will have a sit down with him and talk about rehab and prognosis. We went down and got dad a ham dinner, his favorite. He is having trouble getting it down, the radiation scarred his esophogus and is painful when he swallows. well, best go, hope you all had a great Easter. K

It is amazing, I am away from school and right on food target. Had a berry smoothy, Atkins beverage, and a skinny latte with surgar free flavor that I nursed most of the day. So it is 5:00 o'clock at I have had less than 400 calories so far, I will go home and blend up some veggie soup with protein powder and that should do me. So when I am at school, I am going to have to find a substitute. Anyway, dad is in the hospital and is scheduled for a pacemaker on Monday. I am trying to find some place that he can get the physical theropy he needs. His muscles have atrophied so much that sitting up on his own, standing is difficult and walking is impossible. Mom still thinks she will be able to take him home on Tuesday, but we shall see. You all sound like things are going great, catch you all later, k