cramerk

Good morning ladies!! Woke up to no power this morning, fortunately the lives of students are saved because the power finally came on and now I can have coffee. Students without coffee is NOT something that is safe. I was wondering how I was going to iron clothes and do my hair. The sight of me without either would stop the world, a fat woman should NEVER wear wrinkly clothes with hair standing straight up. My headgear from my cpap machine stick it all straight up. Of course now I am dragging because no power = no cpap machine. With my apnea without my machine I stop breathing 60 to 100 times per hour. I hope that when the weight is off I can quit using the machine. It costs me about $200 a month for the machine and that would make my payment for my lapband. Well, best go farm real quick and then ONE game of spider solitare. Have a good one,k

Just got back from the 'baby's' last band concert, I was fine until they did band awards. Alexa won the Johnn Phillips Sousa award, cried like a baby, me not Alexa. The band director also said individual things about each of the seniors. Her stuff was SO on the mark for Alexa. There have been many times that her and Alexa has butted heads, EVERYONE butts head with Alexa at one time or the other. But in the end her and Alexa have become friends. But this momma is proud. I think it is really starting to hit me. After raising kids for 32 years, they are all moving on with their lives. I always knew Alexa would move on and not look back, but there was a time a figured she would also make a pretty good con man. If there is a different drum that some kids walk by, Alexa has an entire band. She has always been the one I never understood, but it will be hard to see her go. Now I only hope she will not take my car with her when she goes. Okay, enough of that... Finally sitting down to eat something, having yogurt and strawberries, and a tiny amount of granola. I will be making an unfill appointment for after school is out. I'm tired of not eating. You all have a good evening, I probably won't have much time to chat over the next 4 days. So remember you are all in my thoughts & prayers. k

yike over 2 months ago, sorry, miss type

Janet, Naturally I'm in, although I must say that there will be all kinds of junk food this weekend, even carrot cake, one of my weakness. But I had to serve ice cream to 60 7th graders today and didn't even have a bite. I have to repeat this with the 8th graders and 6th graders who have not had any discipline referals. My official weight as of Tuesday was, embarassing enough 213, but considering it was a 255 just over a month ago. So whats up for grabs by the winner????? My daughters last band concert is tonight so I have to head out soon. I had a rough food day, nothing would go down, not even Steph's yummy chicken which I consider a mushie. I struggled with low blood sugar all day with my stomach growling. I ended up having a protein smoothie, 1/8 c chicken salad, even though it hurt, 2 130 c protein bars and a string cheese. I don't like eating the protein bars, okay i love the protein bars, because they go down just like candy but I get a sugar rush from them. I was despret (sp) for food. I can now see why being too tight is bad, I found myself searching for anything that would go down, and naturally all those things are fatening. Well best get going.k

Hummm, where is Stephanie? Anyway, got a phone call from my brother, he is too busy to make it to graduation. Surprise....NOT. He has never made it to any of my girl's graduations. So neither my parents nor my brother will make it. Not a huge deal, just disappointed. Janet I hope today is a better day. Ruby, glad to see you back. I am envious about your committment to exercise. I know I have to get into a more routine exercise. Right now I make up for it with yard work and working at the nursery. But come fall, I always have difficulties. Hopefully this weekend I will conjole one of the 'men folk' into fixing my bike. The bolt that holds the seat is too tight and I can't loosen it to change the seat. You all have a good day, only 13 more days of school. Mainly testing in math and labs in science. Oh and my 'favorite' student has had his Microscope license revoked for not following safety and equipment rules, slammed the microscope on the table (he laughed about it to a friend later), tried to disconnect the eyepiece and body tube from the microscope, and put pond water into the wash bottle, so life will be much easier. Unless of course, I get the directive that I can not give him an alternative assignment and MUST allow him back into the lab. Here's wishing you all good food day!!

Janet, I totally understand the pet issues, even though I was the one who got the last dog. Daughter #3 who is/was married to a Navy boy, is getting a divorce (he was cheating on her) but...she has 4 cats and 1 dog. One of the cats pees all over, and her dog is not house broken although it is 2 years old. She is always welcome, but I can not deal with all the animals. We have 3 dogs and a cat already, I can't handle 4 dogs and 5 cats. My house only is 1100sq.ft. What you are probably more upset about is the fact that you told him that he could not bring in another dog. Maybe it is easier for him to go when you are mad at him, so subconsciously he did the thing that he knew would make you freak. This is just my 2 cents, but dang the ones we love sure can twist us around. I too am looking forward, maybe, to living alone. The scary thing....I never have. Not once have I ever lived alone...if things work as my children plan, I will be alone come September. I am looking forward to it, I will miss my girls, but I think it will be a new adventure. My luck...my dad will take a bad turn and my mother will move in with me. If she does, Janet, can I move in with you? Hang in there, Andrew knows you love him and you DO have the right to establish your house rules. Thanks everyone for the congrats...I am amazed I made it this far, 10 more pounds and I will be half way home. Also, Janet & Phyll, thanks for answering my questions.

Denise, we will put a new job into our prayers!!! I am definitely getting an unfill when school is out. Managed to eat about 1/4 c of soft chicken but with a lot of pain. This seems the strangest thing, I can eat jerky in the afternoon, but not any protein at night. GRRR...

Guess what!!!!!!!!!!!!!I broke the 40 pound mark!!!! I weighed myself this morning and didn't believe it!!! I had to weigh 3 times to make sure it wasn't wrong. So I have lost 42 pounds in just over 2 months!!! I hope that I can keep this up when I get an unfill!! Got the yard weedeated and the pond fixed and ponds plants cleaned & fertilized and put back in the pond, the deck cleaned off, the flower pots cleaned. So all I have left is to find my bedroom, sewing room, and shampoo carpets!!! I'm getting there. Alexa has her last band concert tomorrow. It will be sad, I just hope I don't cry. Going to try some solid protein tonight, I hope it goes down, I have Steph's chicken salad as backup. Well thanks to all of you who go me addicted to farm town....I have to go harvest.

Good morning ladies, back to school, 2 weeks left. I am only working 3 days this week since graduation is this weekend and the family is arriving, so I am taking Friday and Monday off. I hope to weed eat tonight when I get home. Going to have Steph's chicken salad for lunch. The kiddies will be bouncing off the wall, except for this morning. They always are like zombies after a 3 day weekend because the don't go to bed or get up early. Hope everyone has a good day.

Janet, I went with the sandwich because that was all they had, I figured I'd have one bite of the whole sandwich and then eat the tuna, cheese, veggies. I wasn't thinking with the drink, definitely will be working on it. So on average, you can eat 1 cup without pain and still maintain weight? I am working to keep my food quality. My body hasn't figured out the head vs stomach hungry. Yep, I will have to go and get an unfill, or at least go to the doc in kalispell so that I can officially be his patient. Thanks for the suggestions. Also, what does the papya enzyme do? Does it make me PB or just break down the food. Can you use it when you are in public?

Love the photos!! Well I had an embarressing moment today. In town shopping for graduation stuff. Stopped at our local 'Good Food Store' organic foods, to pick up some gluten free stuff for my eldest daughter. We decided to get something to eat since it was 3 pm and hadn't had any food. I was careful with my selection, a tuna melt. This was my first meal out and about. Without thinking I ordered an ice tea because I was dieing of thirst. Well, took a bite of sandwich and followed up with a drink, and you guessed it, right there at the table it came back up. I surely hope that no one saw me. Fortunately I had a pile of napkins and was able to catch most of it. My next stop was the suppliment aisle and picked up the papya enzyme. How do you all eat out, how do you remember. I imagine it comes with practice. Tonight I made Steph's chicken salad, put it in a bed of cantalope. Had about 1/4 cup cantelope and 1/4 c chicken salad. It is fabulous!!! It is definitely making an appearance at the quilting week. I actually remembered to stop eating before I got stuffed. I'm still hungry, but I only had a protein smoothie, 1/2 a protein bar and dinner. Probably low in calories. How much do you guys eat at a meal? I'm making between 1/3 to 1/2 cup at a meal when it isn't a liquid. My energy level is okay, so am I doing okay?

Linda your neighborhood sound like so much fun. I live in a circle, think large cul-de-sac, and only know about 1/4 of the people and that is just to wave at. Last year I was planting a big B&B tree (they weight about 500 pounds) by myself without machinery, just me, my truck, and a shovel. The people next to me hollared at me that 'that looks like fun' and went back inside. I miss having neighbors that would drop everything to give you a hand. Janet, maybe it is time for us to become brazen?? Slept in today, but I was tired. Will be heading to town to do some graduation shopping, food, etc. Then hopefully back to work on the yard and house somemore. This morning was the first time I woke up hungry. But I went to bed hungry so I'm not surprised. I probably was on a calorie deficiet yesterday and I couldn't find anything to fill me up. My calories were higher than usual, but both Saturday & Sunday I busted butt all day to the point I was sweating like a procine, (don't like to use the pig word). Breakfast was a protein smoothie, snack-lunch-snack was a 300 cal protein bar, dinner was 1/4 - 1/3 cup of sushi rolls, 2 FF fudge bars, 1 FF pudding, 1 TBle. cashews. I was starving. Hope today I won't be as hungry, I know we will stop and I with have a skinny latte w/sugar-free hazelnut, so I'll need to save calories for that. I am making Stephs chicken salad today for dinner, I think it will be lovely in a cantelope bowl. I am planning on bringing it to my quilting week and impressing the ladies. Well I best go work my farm, catch you all later, k

Janet, I'm with you on the flirting with a guy, I'm all talk & no show. If some guy flirted I'd have to have someone hit with a brick and be told...'hey that guy is hitting on you' THEN once I realized it, I'd head for the hills. Sad but true. I even paid the years membership on eharmony, because my girls talked me into it. I haven't finished my profile, so I my info doesn't go out. Then they really suggest you put a picture in, yeah right, who wants someone who has 3 chins... I'm really tired so I'm heading to bed, I'm hungry. See you all tomorrow.

Kira thanks you so much for the email of the earth science teacher, I am so grateful for someone who has been in the earth science trenches since I am so new to it. It was crazy at work, lots of customers and I had to clean 2 ponds and put out the water plants, they look good!! Spent most of this month's nursery pay checks, oh well. Ate 3 pieces of sushi for dinner and stopped, they were about 1/3 of a cup. Probably low on protein, but they sure were delish!! Shower is done and now I can veg for the rest of the evening!! check in later, k

Phyl, glad you are back!! have fun reading, we worked hard to give you lots of pages... Sorry you are tight, you all say, "Drink something hot" SO Phyl...'Drink something hot!' You've dropped over 20 on your BMI ticker, keep it up, great job. I now see why you all talk about plastic surgery. Wore a tank top to work on the fence yesterday, and MAN where my upper arms waving!! Last time I lost weight of any significant amount, my skin tightened up, now that I am 50 (nasty) things are just flapping. I'm glad to loose the weight, and I am working hard lifting, carrying, pounding, so I hope it does tighten up. If I told my family that I was going to MX for plastic surgery, they may just flip. Only 2 weeks of school...then I can relax a bit. I hope Karri is having a good time on her hike. Steph, do you have more parties today? Ruby it is time to come back!!! I'm going to email you!!

Steph, like you said, a walk around the block use to be a long walk. Remember how far you've come when you get down. Every time I look at your before pics I can't even believe you were hiding in there. Also, remember you are an inspiration. I would have NEVER had what it takes to do this without you blazing the trail for me. I hope that someday I will be able to pass on the inspiration. There is a teacher at school that I'd like to help. I haven't told her about my band. I am going to wait until she comments about how much I've lost and then I am going to share with her. Even though I have lost almost 40 pounds I really don't 'look' different. Fortunately, my quilting buddy that I told tells me each day how good I look. It keeps me going when I get down. I hope to be down under 200 by the time school starts again. I only weigh once a week because I don't want to get frustrated with any thing less than a pound. I don't even own a scale, I use the one at school. So Steph, remember, you are my hero!! Well, best get going, I have to work tomorrow. We will find out how good I fixed the fence. The wind is blowing like crazy!!! Chat with you all tomorrow!!

Whohoo, I was able to eat 2 pieces of sushi!!! Probably about 1/4 cup. But I ruined it when I decided it wasn't enough and had a piece of laughing cow cheese which overfilled me and now I am miserable. I'll learn someday soon I hope.

I would like to go somewhere warmish not hotish. I melt under the hot and I burn after 5 minutes in the sun. I never get sun rash because I go straight to the burn. But I'm game for anywhere, like I said, I just want the cute buns of steel cabana boy to flirt with.

Just got in from outside. Got most of the privacy fence back up, the hard part anyway. The girls will put the last pieces of lattice up while I'm at work. My Beast, 1977 Chevy 4 door pick up had a dead battery so I couldn't make a dump run and the dump is closed until next week AND I needed the truck tomorrow to bring a couple of yards of bark back from work. The Beast is awesome, got it for $500 last year and it purrs like a kitten. I do love an old beatter truck. So I will grovel to the boss tomorrow and see if I can borrow the nursery truck and bring some bark home that way. Otherwise I will have to go after school and it is a 40 minute drive to the nursery so by the time I'd get home it would be after 7 pm. My PA daughter and her significant other are coming up thursday night so we can finish getting things presentable on Friday before the big shingdig. My lawyer daughter and her husband come in on Friday I think. Did you notice a little bit of bragging there? Yep, I am pretty proud that these 2 girls from nowhere Montana have done so well. Well, it is my turn for the shower, so I best go scrub up. We are having sushi for dinner as a treat for a day of hard labor. I only hope that I can eat it. It will be such a bummer if it sticks. Oh and talked to my kids about birthday/Christmas gifting funds towards our lapband cruise and they are on board. That way I will have a little fun money. Chat later after the shower and dinner. Oh and Steph, when you are done with your garage mine needs done before friday, just come on up.

Candice, it sounds like you all are going to have a fabulous time!!! I wish I could make it. The week you all have planned is my quilting week at the lake/cabin with my quilting ladies. The cabin is owned by the father of one of the ladies and is on Holter lake outside of Great Falls. Each year we challenge each other to a little 'chunkin dunkin' to jump in the lake nude. Let's just say, we've done the chunkin dunkin with our clothes, no one has had the nerve to go naked. We have been going for 7 years now and we have a blast. Everyone brings projects and their 'special' meals. My specialties are chocolate dipped shortbread, hazelnut biscotti, peach sorbet, iced spice coffee, can you see what the week is like. We also do a mini quilt shop tour at Choteu, Helena, Great Falls. No children, no DH, in the evenings we watch movies and do hand work. It is my only vacation each year. But I must say, that if we change the dates I will check into the cost of flying up, if I can afford it, I'd love to come, thanks for the invite. Plus I need to save funds if we are going to try to go on a cruise. Today is the last weekend before graduation so this is the final push before guests arrive. I'll be outside most of the day working. Linda, I so understand what you are saying about college students. When one of my daughters was at Duke in their PA program, students would complain about the things you talked about. My daughter, being a small town girl, and thrilled to have the opportunity to go to Duke was outraged, as she said, My Gosh, we are at one of the finest PA school is the world and you are complaining that it is too tough. Isn't that what it is suppose to be. I guess that is why I am frustrated with teaching right now. I know I need to change or get a different career, but as you know, a teaching degree doesn't transfer very well to different careers. I never finished my masters because I couldn't get a middle school science masters. AND there could be the issue of me telling the science education professor that the class was lame, he had us doing a bunch of 'Project Wild/Wet' activities that I was already a trainer for. Well he was assigned as my advisor...and he refused to sign off on my plan of study. I did learn a fine lesson, keep your darn mouth shut. I am much better now. Well I think I did my part in filling space for Phyll. I'll check in later when I take a break from working.

Calories for today 650, I had trouble eating dinner, got about 2 tsp. of chicken down, didn't work. I ended up eating 2 FF fudge bars. I'll try to eat some yogurt later when I am not sore. I guess I do need an unfill. I'm starting to eat slider food. Breakfast, protein smoothie; snack frozen FF pudding cup & bite of jerky; Lunch, 1/2 c tomato soup, SF jello; snack, 2 bites jerky; Dinner, 2 tsp chicken, 2 FF fudge bar. These are not the best quality foods, so tomorrow I am going to make Steph's chicken salad and see if that will go down. Frustrated, I know, lady take thee to the doc & get thee an unfill. I keep thinking it will get better, that tomorrow I'll be able to eat. Just some thoughts.

Steph, it must have been so hard to see your kids...you miss them, and I can tell that they love you. How could they otherwise you are fabulous!! I need to sit down and figure out what I am going to do about the end of the year. We are limited in the amount of homework we are allowed to give, I am allowed only 12 to 15 problems each day and no homework on fridays. I know that I will be battling myself this next two weeks. I am not happy about losing the math classes. The teacher who got them stopped me yesterday and asked me what I do about math notes because our next years math text does not come with a preprinted set of notes. I told him (by the way he is an ex-pro football player who was hired to coach football but refuses) that I write my own notes because the ones that come with the book are confusing. He informed me that there was no way he was going to take the time to write up notes. This is the same teacher that is teaching 6th grade earth science (which I will be teaching next year) and didn't want the lab supplies cluttering his room so he threw them away. Yep, I just vented, time to let it go. Just one thing, I'd appreciate if any of you know someone who teaches 6th grade earth science, could you connect us. I have never taught it and I have NO activities or projects or labs. Just woke up from a little nap, uhhh how about a 2 hour nap. I know I was stressed, but I didn't think that bad. I was so incredibly out of it. I'm home alone tonight. i think it has been 6 months since I have been in the house alone. If I was really ambitious i would do something productive, NOT. My most productive thing was putting water on some trees. So how many pages did we mange to fill for Phyll? Lets hope Karri has a good hiking trip!! Catch ya, k

Oh karri, I loved it! and can I relate. If you are like me, we take it personally when we plan something nice that we expect the students to show some appreciation in the form of somewhat evolved behavior. Then they don't...Unfortunately I don't know if the kids have changed or if I am just tired and I have changed, but the result is the same. Students' attitude is that I am here to serve them. This week our middle schools students decided to plan a food fight in the lunch room. One of them snuck out and shut off all the lights (our lunchroom does not have windows) then the 'fun' began. Chile (sp) flew everywhere along with trays, applesauce, etc. Here is the part that just frustrates me. The student's consequences... no ala carte (which is like a store that kids can get things like chicken strips, etc instead of hot lunch) for 2 days. You have got to be kidding me. Parents have planned the last week of school with ice cream parties, game days, to the point that our principal has told us to collect books and finish grades around May 2nd. We don't get out of school until May 12. In my opinion these activities should be canceled. Oh well, I'm not called the 'Devil in the blue dress' for nothing. I'm not here to entertain you. Okay enough.. Janet, we could put a note on the door during the cruise if one of us gets 'lucky'. I was going to suggest a tie, but no one wears those anymore and a bra just wouldn't be very discrete. Think I'll take a little nap, students were just bouncing off the walls today. Catch ya all later, k

Karri, self image is always our problem, whether too fat OR too thin, too young or too old, pretty or plain. We have been fat because food makes us feel better. The issues that made us fat and are still there. We have to deal with those issues. How??? Probably accept ourself, putting history away, ??? I'm not sure, I'm still trying to figure it all out myself. On that note, have a good Friday, whohooo a 3 day weekend. I will be working on Sunday, Saturday and Monday will be devoted to finding the house and yard. One more week before the friends & family arrive. Can I run away now?

Managed to get down about 1/3 c of FF yogurt and dried fruit and seeds/nuts. That should tide me over until breakfast. See you all tomorrow, hey Karri, it is Friday!!! But my last weekend to get things done before Graduation!! The baby graduates, it is going to be so strange AND she will be 19 in June. How did I manage to get so old. I know I am on the path to a better me, I just hope I change more than my appearance. I need to change my attitude and be more outgoing. I'm fine when I'm in my comfort zone, but I have a very limited comfort zone. You all have a good night, and Karri, you know your body best, we all just worry. I admire your committment to exercise. My exercise right now is yard work. See ya!