Giving up

I have tried many times to figure out why my friends aren't happy for me. Here is my conclusion: women see other women for the most as competition, whether it is cooking, the clothes you wear or the car you drive. Not all women feel this but there are still a few people that may be within your close circle who will not understand the plight of your fight and that’s okay. Just remember to limit the information you give them and you won’t have to hear it again. They can still be a friend but not a buddy. A buddy is someone that’ll go down in the trenches with you and get dirty then climb out and extend their hand to help pull yourself out. A buddy will remise about the many battles you’ve fought together over the years and laugh or cry together and then celebrate your victories time and time again. A buddy can be male or female, husband or wife, brother, sister, mother, father, son or daughter. A buddy is a person you connect with and even at times when you don’t understand what the other buddy is going through, you try to be empathic and listen as long as it takes your buddy to overcome his or her struggle. What is the difference between a friend and a buddy? A friend will scoop you up and take you to the hospital after fighting a fierce battle; a buddy will go to battle the ground with you and fight with love and a whole lot of prayers. Question: What is the difference between a friend and a buddy?

Hello Everyone, My band date is 1/12/09 Dr. Monash is very nice and informative. He is partners with Dr.S. I live on the far eastside. I would love to swap recipes. Ann

You guys are all so awesome and this web-site is a blessing. Hang in there MsNana your time is coming when its time.

I agree with you, when I told my "best" friend, she I have always given in to vanity and I should really think twice about doing it. Wow! It is shocking sometimes to find out what people really think about you. I have not mentioned anything about my surgery since May of this year; we still talk all of the time. Why do I feel I have to keep this a secret from my best friend? Honestly, I really don't want to tell anybody my discussion after her reaction, only my "close" family members know that I have made a firm decision and have a surgery date.

THANK YOU so much I am so happy you did this! Great, great, great! Yea! Ann

Rafa2, Its okay to feel this way, you would be lying to yourself if said it's okay or I don't care. Your feelings are just that "yours". It's better to put a little distance between the two of you for as long as need to... this way you won't end up saying something that may destroy the relationship completely. Don't give up on your friendship, she need a little time to adjust too. She’s most likely not accustomed to sharing the spot light. Let her know that her friend is changing on the outside and becoming healthier on the inside and for that the two of you should celebrate your new approach to life. Thank you for posting, Ann

Bubblegum, No better words could be spoken into the ears of those longing to hear wisdom. Thank you, Ann

Hi Tracey, I have a friend that had G-bypass about 10 months ago and I admit that I really didn't want her to have the surgery at that time because she was so sick that I was not sure if she was strong enough to pull throw it but as I told her, "your Dr. knows far better than I do". After her surgery she had a horrible time with vomiting and nausea. She vomited so much you could smell her approaching (I know that sounds gross) but true. I offered my help and support to just come over and sit with her or take her out for a drive. Before her surgery every time we went out we stopped at a restaurant at some point even if it was just to chat over a cup of coffee. She seemed distant after she fully recovered but we are still friends.

Hey Apple, I grew up in Birmingham!

I have tried many times to figure out why my friends aren't happy for me. Here is my conclusion: women see other women for the most as competition, whether it is cooking, the clothes you wear or the car you drive. Not all women feel this but there are still a few people that may be within your close circle who will not understand the plight of your fight and that’s okay. Just remember to limit the information you give them and you won’t have to hear it again. They can still be a friend but not a buddy. A buddy is someone that’ll go down in the trenches with you and get dirty then climb out and extend their hand to help pull yourself out. A buddy will remise about the many battles you’ve fought together over the years and laugh or cry together and then celebrate your victories time and time again. A buddy can be male or female, husband or wife, brother, sister, mother, father, son or daughter. A buddy is a person you connect with and even at times when you don’t understand what the other buddy is going through, you try to be empathic and listen as long as it takes your buddy to overcome his or her struggle. What is the difference between a friend and a buddy? A friend will scoop you up and take you to the hospital after fighting a fierce battle; a buddy will go to battle the ground with you and fight with love and a whole lot of prayers. Question: What is the difference between a friend and a buddy?

Hello everybody, I was happy to see this post tried to figure how to make a post yesterday... good job! My band date is set for 12th but I don't no the time yet. I have been married almost 21 years our anniversary is 2-20. I have three children; 20, 18, and 13. They are the joy of my life and source of nearly every migraine. I realize that this is an awesome opportunity to improve my health and for that reason alone I will dictate my all to successfully lose the weight. I was approved in November but it wasn’t until I joined this site and saw all of the before and after pics that I began to realize that I to will lose not only the weight but a few dress sizes as well. I have been so focused on not having to use my CPAP every time I take a nap or got to bed at night and my A1C being under 7.5 that I just had not thought about my outward physical appearance and (WOW). This is plus for me all around. The only fear I have is "what if I fail". This will take all of the things I don’t have to be successful... discipline, commitment to exercise and will power which are all of the things that got me where I am today. Sorry to me a drip but I guess I needed to say this to people I think may understand, God knows my friends don't. I have learned so much from reading the postings and to be honest I find myself logging in several times a day just to feel united. Dr. Monash is my surgeon Tucson, Az

Too cool! I simply love it.

Hi Sweetalie, I haven't been banded yet so what I have to say is merely an observation not of much help but something to think about nontheless. 1. Are following a low carb diet? 2. Are getting enough excercise? 3. Are you helping yourself to lose the weight or are you depending soely on the band? 4. Are you happy? Being a newbie, the answers to these questions sure will help me more than you can ever imagine. Thanks, Ms.Ann

:tongue_smilie: I have several... Lately by Tyress, If I were your woman by Glads Knight/ Alica Keys; Flash Light by Parliament; Loves Train by O'Jays and the list goes on and on.