anonemouse

See, to me, that says that you realize that your punishment isn't proper for public use. And again, if you can't punish your children in public, you shouldn't be using that method.

There is a midpoint between "slapping children repeatedly in public" and cold-bloodedly whipping them. If you can't see that, then that says a heck of a lot about you.

I've thought about it for a while, and I think that part of what I found disturbing is that you seem to be back-tracking. You said you use a "flexible leather implement," but then you said that it isn't a "flexible leather implement," after all. You said that the punishment is meant to inflict pain, and then you said, "but it only stings a little." You said that you have your children keep their hands on the wall while you hit them, but then you said that you only hit them once or twice. (Which doesn't make sense because, in my experience, children only really try to block painful, repeated blows. If there is only one or two "stinging" blows, most children I've observed, including myself when I was spanked as a child, don't try to block the next one. And if you are hitting them only hard enough to sting, and not create marks, it shouldn't matter if the strap or whatever it is hits their arm, since the blow wouldn't be enough to do anything.) You seemed proud of what you were doing, but once people started speaking up against it (even people who do spank their children), you said that you really aren't doing what you said you were doing. Then you started trying to portray those people that do spank their children as uncaring, anger-filled monsters.

To be honest, the whole thing is disturbing to me. I can't tell you why, but it is. I'll have to think about it. If I can figure out why that punishment is disturbing, I'll let you know. Someone "spanking" their child isn't disturbing to me, yet what you are describing is, for some reason.

Gadget, I can't talk for anyone else, but it isn't the anger-free punishment that bothers, just the method of punishment. I am a huge supporter of not punishing a child while the adult is angry. I think that DOES lead to the adult going farther than they otherwise would. I just don't believe in hitting someone with an "implement."

So you wouldn't hesitate to do this to your children in a mall, then? I invite you to do it, then. The next time your children act up, take them to your local mall, right into the food court. Apply your punishment there, and see what happens. If you don't get people coming up to you, or security isn't called, or you don't get arrested, I'll eat my hat. I would imagine that the humiliation would just be extra enforcement to a child.

Gadget, what exactly is your "flexible leather stick," then? And let me ask you this: Would you be willing to give this punishment in the middle of your local mall, if your daughters "acted up" there?

I wouldn't dream of turning someone in to family services for an authentic spanking in public. Simple swats on the rear with a hand isn't child abuse to me, and I doubt most people feel that it is. I think spanking like you are talking about could be commonly applied in public without the fear of being arrested. That's why I said that if you believe that your method of physical punishment could be applied in public with little fear of arrest or interference from other people, it would probably be a proper punishment. I think, though, that if a parent wouldn't dare apply their type of physical punishment on their child in public without intense fear that someone would interfere, they are probably going too far in the punishment. The bottom line, IMO, is that if you can do it in public, it's a decent punishment; if you can't, it's abuse.

Yes, I am. Here is what you said that you do to your children: Here's the definition of whipping: By your own admission, you whip your children. I don't care if you call it "swatting" or "switching," or whatever, it is whipping. And to be honest, if I ever saw you do it in public, I'd be the first to call the police. You may do it so that you don't leave marks, but you are whipping your children.

I think the real test of physical punishment is whether or not it could be applied in public with little or no interference from surrounding people. If you can't do it in public, it probably shouldn't be done. I think having your children lean against a wall in public, not allowing them to shield themselves, while you hit them with a switch or other "implement" would be a really quick way to find yourself either in jail or being visited by family services. A light smack on the butt won't get anyone visited by family services and sure won't get anyone arrested. Whipping someone will.

I think it is just one of the quirks of the English language. Here's the entry I learned it in (it was a listing of pet-peeves in online fanfiction):

The key words there are "medically necessary." You need to find out their standards for "medically necessary" surgery. I would assume that you are fine, though, since you have a BMI of at least 40 and have co-morbidities.

I'm sorry, is that supposed to be funny or supportive? One of the basic rules here is that you don't attack the person, you attack the idea. Not all of us think that you attacking and ridiculing someone is funny.

Women are blonde, men are blond. I just learned that yesterday, in fact!

My brother is getting married in early July. He just told us this in the last few days. (He had gotten his girlfriend pregnant and they were getting married, but she had a miscarriage last week. But they are apparently still going through with the wedding.) It's on super-short notice, so all they are going to do is have a civil ceremony with her parents and me and my parents there with them. I am SO relieved. I was really afraid that they were going to ask me to be in the wedding party. I didn't want to do it, but I have a hard time saying no to people. I had more than enough of being a bridesmaid at my ex-roommate's wedding.

I'd rather not, thanks. Olives are disgusting (other than yummy extra virgin olive oil, that is). :eek:

Where can I get samples of protein drinks? I don't want to pay a lot of money for something that I might not like.

Have you taken measurements to see if you are losing fat and gaining muscle?

My pre-authorization testing: Pulmonologist clearance Drug/Alcohol screening Nutritionist consult Psych consult Upper GI series Physical clearance from PCP

Yep. Love Tom Petty.

Speaking of smooth sailing, look at you! You've done so well!

To be honest, I don't like spanking, in most cases, but I do realize that there might be instances where it could be used in an appropriate manner. I was spanked as a child. My dad had an anger problem. He scared the crap out of me when he would spank me, because I was never certain if he would remain in control. His face would turn tomato-red, his eyes would bug out, and he'd scream. He never lost control completely with me, but he sure scared me silly sometimes. I learned to lie and be sneaky as a result. My reasoning was this: if you don't get caught, you don't get spanked. I am still not completely comfortable around my dad. His anger problem really created a gap between us, because I was always scared that he could go off at any moment. I think that if non-violent discipline is used consistently from an early age, most children respond to it. Of course, if you let your children run wild and then try to teach them discipline, it won't work. While spanking might work on those children, I think that if the non-violent variety is used consistently from an early age, it does work.

Ooh, hey, I figured out how to get rid of the chick, if you're interested. Just go to your control panel, click "edit options," and go down to "forum skin" (under miscellaneus options). You can change it to where the girl isn't showing.

I think there is a distinct difference in the behavior of kids when they are just threatened with a punishment and when that punishment is consistent and followed through with. Talking and non-violent punishment DOES work when the parent is consistent with the punishment and the punishment IS applied when threatened. Unruly kids that are prone to talking back and breaking rules isn't a result of their parents failing to paddle them. It's a result of their parents failing to follow through with threatened punishment and their parents not being consistent. Kids that are paddled at home aren't necessarily going to be well-behaved kids. Good behavior isn't a result of the type of punishment inflicted on a child, in many cases, but rather the consistency of it.

So, I will be having surgery this summer. I am also doing field work for my thesis this summer. I have been trying to come up with a time frame that I can ask my advisor to let me take off after I have surgery. I don't think I would be carrying anything extremely heavy, but I may be carrying several light traps and a banding kit at one time (maybe 10-15 pounds total). I will probably be climbing over some fences (barbwire fencing and/or steel gates), and climbing up ladders to put cameras in trees (which may include a lot of stretching, since I am short and so is the ladder). Some of my sites are a hike from the access point, also, and some are in hilly areas. So, all in all, my field work wouldn't be super-strenuous, but it wouldn't be sitting behind a desk, either. I was thinking that I would probably go ahead and take an entire two weeks off, just in case. And then I start thinking about finances, since I am not paid for time that I don't work. So now, I don't know whether to go ahead and tell my advisor once I get my date that I will be taking two weeks after surgery, or to tell him that I will take a week and see where I am after that.