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yea Pam is kicking butt.............:-)

eDoing the food log............I have been home sick the last two days and they have been my worst two days in a week. I get bored at home and wanna snack........but ah sugar free popsicles go right down. Lucky I only had two at 35 calorie each but I want more. I do better when I am at work or out and about. I wonder if Robin will wonder what happened on the last two days.......obvious to me I did worse. Still until 1000 calories but it is a crappy food log yesterday and today. I need a plan.................LOL. Maybe I need to start gardening or become a fanatic house cleaner or something!! We did get rid of our cable last week cause my daughter and I both waste to much time watching TV when we are home. It is also alot cheaper without it. What other fun/cheap hobbies are there to keep me busy and not bored?? I love to read but that is not considered an activity!! LOL.

Pam your doing great!! Like I told you before I can already tell a change in your mindset towards food and I like your program cause they do address (or it seems to me anyway) the emotional eating stuff. I also like th weekly support groups for 84 weeks and girlfriend you kicking butt on weight loss. Regardless of what anyone says we all have to do what is right for us!! Your a totally inspiration and if I had the money..........well ya know I told you before I am jealous of your program!!:-) I agree that restriction won't totally fix things. I am afraid of that but I hope with restriction I will have a 50/50 chance. Of course I am doing the whole support group and trying to get into counseling again. I have done 6 years of counseling and last time they said I didn't need anymore at my assessment but they did want me in a support group once a week. A stress management/anti anxiety group. So I trying to get back into that group. I am afraid what will happen when I find out about sliders and all that. I am trying NOT to find out but I know eventually I will. So far not much goes down. But beans...........hmm I eat alot of beans are they really a slider??? They hurt going down and sit there for hours? Pam help me out here!! I never got a call from the psychologist at Richmond. So I decided I am on my own. I thought they were gonna try to help me get into something here quick in Sacramento. THey said something about someone specializing in food issues. I guess they got busy and forgot me. I tried to call and left a message on Friday at Richmond telling them I was hoping they were still gonna help me find something. Sent in my food log too but didn't hear anything back yet. Honestly the best support I have gotten thus far is just talking to Dr. Baggs and emailing him a few times. He is big on me doing monthly appointments for awhile and I probably need it if nothing else for the weigh ins!! :-) I told him I am not sure about another fill I might wanna chill .........but in a month maybe I will change my mind. So I am just hoping I keep on a roll until I address the emotional stuff and than somehow the restriction and emotional healing stuff will kick in together. Pam you are Rockin it Girlfriend!!! :-) Doing so well on the liquids and bars. I am afraid I would have cheated by now if I were you...........

I think eventually Kaiser will give up the banding too........but we will see. The aftercare alone takes up tons of the surgeons time. If I could get to goal at Band I won't revise and now things are going well. When I talked to Dr. Baggs about revisions he didn't say no, her certainly didn't say yes either. I think mostly he listened actually. I need to kick up the exercise.

Ah COCO we made it together to the sweet spot..........I agree with everything you said. It has been so nice!! Not hungry here either at all and yep mornings are more of a struggle. I SO LOVE my band right now!! Christine I didn't know you were to tight at 8ccs interesting? I was PBing 3 times a day when I was at 6cc's!! It hurt so bad I don't think I will ever want to go there again........:-) So I totally get it!!

Ah I didn't get medicated soap!! LOL. I did get the CD and if you lived closer I would pass it on. I have mine saved on my IPOD...........Yea Ash you made it!! Welcome back Christine. I just came back too it has been awhile. Glad your back!! Dex is cute I have been keeping up with the pictures on FB. He looks SO MUCH like you!! So do you have to build up on fills or do you go back to your previous fill? Will be nice to have some of the old people back on here again!! Yea!! So in the end you only gained 10 pounds!! Not bad at all, can't wait to see Dex!

This is from Allergen: Prior to receiving an EFFECTIVE fill, it is VERY uncommon to have any restriction from a Lap-Band®. Some patients will NOT lose weight, or may even GAIN weight until they have received an effective fill in their Lap-Band®. Normal weight loss with a properly restricted Lap-Band® is between 1 and 2 pounds per week. EFFECTIVE is the key word here there is alot more to post..... it talks some about how losing weight after an effective fill means you need another fill. I think that is what Kaiser is doing that is the policy they follow. Just they forgot the EFFECTIVE fill first part before the earning fills with weight loss.........I don't want to post the whole article it is to long.......But Kaiser is not entirely wrong just seems like the definetion of EFFECTIVE is different at different places and maybe even for each separate surgeon.........EFFECTIVE to me means I feel it and it hurts or jolts me if I mess up............to someone else maybe not. I think ALLERGEN says 1-2 pounds a week is their definetion of EFFECTIVE.......so according to that many people are stuck without EFFECTIVE fills and still expected to keep up with the 1-2 pounds a week. I also think a doctor and patient can have a different idea of EFFECTIVE too............it is all subjective and hard to really pin down. One could have good restriction and cheat the band..........and not lose or one could not have any restriction and just not lose. How are the docs suppose to figure it all out..........how are we suppose to figure it all out?? LOL. Well everyone can figure out what this means to them...........I know what it meant to me.

John that is exactly what Dr. Baggs said it was hard with all three of them........ok I will try to hold my jealousy in check!!

Tamra: Losing interest is normal. We all do it at some point. THat is why the first few weeks are the lap band honeymoon time we all go through it. I will find that quote for you and post it over here. Someone on the forum gave it to me. I think what helped for me was telling Dr. Baggs that I was losing my motivation and I needed to see the scale move even two or three pounds so that my mindset could kick in.....He and Robin both liked and seemed to understand that. JOHN: I am so darn jealous of your sleeve and no aftercare!! Phone appointment!! Nice!! But ya I chose the band so my stomach wasn't cut. I always worry about if something goes wrong......than they can take it back outand I can still be me!! Easy to say I would pick the sleeve but not sure I could go through with it. Besides as much as it sucks I need to do the psychological work that goes with overeating and this is forcing me to. Like I told Dr. Baggs when I have no restriction I get a *&^% it attitude. Sometimes I talk to much but I get nervous when I go into Kaiser sometimes..........

I had GERD before the lapband and afterwards it was totally cured.

The fill center only gives .50 at a time. I think I should put that out there. So if you need alot more than .50 it could get expensive. I was really close I needed three fills. But something I thought I should mention. They don't do the bit fills.................that could make it get expensive depending on the person. Dr. Altchusher Weight Loss and Wellness Clinic in Navato is where I went. She does medically controlled weight loose and the liquid diets all that stuff......fills are not her speciality. She alsos stressed behavior stuff with me....

one warning: I could overate right now. The band can't stop what I put in there. It will just reject it if it is to much. What happens if you overeat is that you PB. If you consistently overeat you PB every meal and if this happens daily than the band is gonna swell and your gonna need an unfill or at least be uncomfortable.............So I don't advise being as tight as I am unless your gonna work really hard to avoid PB'ing. That is the difference in my behaviro between now and seven months ago. I am NOT testing the band this time I am being very gentle and listening to it and feeling it so I don't PB. no more last bites or going back to try and eat again after a PB.........If you can't commit to that than you could end up needing an unfill or worst case scenario end up in the ER. That is what I did wrong in the past trying to push my band and control it instead of letting it be in controland help me out. The band has to be in control.............Of course Dr.Baggs loved my new theory!! LOL I am so afraid of an unfill that I put the spoon down as soon as I get the lump in my throat!! Two PB's this week and trying make that all I have this month!! And I chill on eating anything for a few hours after a PB so I can let it rest. That is my dislaimer cause I could end up needing an unfil very easy at this restriction level if I don't respect my band. But it is so much easier to not overeat when you have good restriction. I am seriously just not hungry or interested in eating right now and that is half the battle!! Somehow it all falls into place with a good fill. anyone else have the same experience????

Tamra we are alot alike which is probably why we butt heads sometimes!! :-) I am a fighter everyone knows that. I fought for my fill and to get back on track. But maybe and hopefully that makes it easier for everyone behind me. I was very scared to see Dr. Baggs and go to Kaiser last week and confront them but I did and Dr. Baggs was the best!! TAMRA: I was EXACTLY where you were at a week ago and after seven months my habits were not great. My will power was shot. I hate to see anyone else go that long without restriction or a fill. And I was paying Kaiser and the fill center which was expensive. I totally hear you. Can you talk to Dr. Baggs and advocate for yourself.........maybe tell him about the insurance thing? I have a quote I will try to find from Allergen that says that fills need to happen until you get restriction THAN after you have restriction they are suppose to start having you lose to get the fills.........or earn your fills. Ok here is an idea bargain for a fill like I did........food logs, counseling, support groups............and a FILL with NO WEIGHT LOSS. Sorry I know it sucks so been there!! CHRISSY: I think someday the sleeve might take over the band surgeries. I wonder if someday they stop doing bands all together. ANd yepthat was my thought why have this darn band and port if I can't use it. NOt Fair!!

Once you get a good fill the band seems worth it.......my opinion. There is such a HUGE difference between now and a week ago. I am NOT hungry and am having to remind myself to eat this week. Last week I was struggling not to eat to much. Night and day difference with good restriction at least for me. I eat to much when I am bored or stressed. But now it hurts to much to do that so who knows what new addiction I will pick up when I get bored or stressed. For anyone out there in bandster hell it gets better with fills...............at least for me. Good restriction makes food a job not a hobby for me. No fun to eat if it hurts and nothing fits down there............I have to plan to make sure what I can get down keeps me full......thus it becomes a job to stay full!! It changes my mindset and months ago when I had restriction it was the same thing that is why I like the band. I can't complain right now although I sure did when I was in bandster hell....... Tamra 18 is good though. It took me six months to lose 34 after surgery............oh course now I am losing some of the same 34 but it is all good :-) Just try not to gain cause getting it off the second time is harder than the first I should know!!

Tamra that is a hard one. 365 IS ALOT. It just about killed me. I am still juggling my finances after doing that. But the 165 is easier. 147 ongoing gets expensive too.......If you only need a few fills it might be cheaper to go to the fill center. I did two and I needed one more........I suck at math but that comes out to about 600 dollars or six months of Kaiser. If your already at 5cc's you must be getting close. For me I was starting to gain weight and I worked to hard to lose. I HAD to get a fill to avoid losing ground....so I decided it was worth the money. JUst I was still paying 300 a month for Kaiser at the same time. But I am losing now so it is all good.........we all have to do what we have to do. I think it is worth the money. But if you could stick with Kaiser just until you get good restriction it might be cheaper. That 365 hurts!!

Donna and Angel both will be out on the 22nd that is why Angel sent out the email................. :-( The higher power stuff is where I got stuck before too......I would rather be in control and can't figure out how to fit in a higher power.......it never really clicked with me. But I think the fact it didn't click might mean something :-) LOL. Maybe me wanting to be in control all the time is what gets me in trouble. But yea I am not sure if it would work for me or not either. A sponser is a really control issue for me though..........that would bug the crap outta me to have to answer to someone all the time or if they got in my face.........*********Sigh******** Debating if being in control all the time is really all it is cracked up to be. :w00t:

I am down 1 pound this morning. No dinner last night so that is why I am sure...... You go through the main fill center in Arizona. They than call and make the appointment with you three way for the closest location. THe lady I work with done in Arizona is Charlotte Yazzie. You have to fill out an online application. The first appointment is 365 and includes a lifetime sign up fee. You get like a binder and book at the first appointment and a fill, and a check up on the band. After that you call and schedule an appointment through the Arizona office when you want another fill. After the first one it is 165 a fill. You can go to any fill center in the USA once your signed up. So if you move or if a closer location opens up.......you can change with no extra charge. The year plan is 1200 and includes 8 fills. I knew I didn't want to do that one. THe good thing is you get an appointment the next week. They get you in fast.....1 8663455872 Charlotte Yazzie is who answers. I am happy to be back at Kaiser. I really like the fill center too but Kaiser is a good fit for me right now. But if fills get crazy again I can always go back to the fill center .................just wish they had one in Sacramento.

IF the sleeve was around when I had surgery I probably would have taken it. All the appointments are hard and I worry about my insurance all the time. With the sleeve I would think your ok if you lose your insurance. I had a hard time finding a fill doc to see me without insurance. I didn't realize how hard it would be to find someone.....

Ah I am not sure I want a sponser.......LOL. Kaiser and the food logs are enough of a babysitter for me right now. Can't you go to OA and just sit in? I am also looking at Celebrate Recovery down the street from my house. I told Dr. Baggs is was sad at 38 years old that I need to have a babysitter and do food logs........we both laughed and he said your not alone in needing to do food logs!! LOL.

John I don't think a fill would help you much!! LOL. WHat is the follow up appointments like with the sleeve?? HOw many times in a year? Sounds like you throw up alot at first??

50 is good!! Ali you could lead the group at Point West?? I thought about it but I don't really like being up front that much. I sorta want to be in the group and not leading it this time around. Maybe later. I always tackle the big issues even when I try not to!! LOL. JOHN- No way I would go to the middle east and I also am NOT eating in front of people this week. I make funny faces when I get to full.........and people wonder what is wrong with me. CANDRA: We think so much alike........I feel like I am reading my own post sometimes!! Where are you?

Ah COCO.........yea. I so loved the fill center and agree with everything you said. They made me feel like I needed a fill not like it was my fault. They were quite shocked and upset about what was going on with my fills at Kaiser. They told me to file a compliant with Kaiser and I sorta think they read my binder and called and complained too. They treated me so well and made me feel like I was a success even when I gained three pounds. THey also said the same thing if you hit a plateau and don't lose for three weeks it is time for a fill..and if you gain for SURE you need a fill. I am so glad you like them I think they have the same philosophy as the one I went to. IS this through FILL CENTERS USA? that is who I use they offices all over the country. THe general philosophy in lap band world is if your NOT losing or plateau it is time for a fill. If your losing at least two pounds a week you don't. That is why Kaiser is so confusing. They do it backwards. My fill doc said that was not ethical...........but I am not gonna negetive it gets me in big trouble on this forum. But that is why I filed the compliant becuase I had research and second opinions to back me up. And I am losing now and doing great just a week after a good fill!! Makes a point it is hard to think it is not YOUR fault when the band is to loose and your not losing or gaining. Just that the band isn't being used like it was designed to work. COCO I so hear ya IM me later............and I actually thought you were gonna announce you were pregnant!! LOL. I hope that is not TMI but I thought..........

Hey Candra yep we are alot alike!! And guess what my hands annoyingly always swell when I exercise. LOL. And the 12 step stuff is hard!! I have never really done it.....just that since I think I have control of food and not food having control of me...........that got me thinking .....cause the first step is that food is a problem for me........ok I think that is true!! LOL. So maybe.. Than Dr. Baggs saying it is an addiction straight out like he did got me thinking too......next time I see him I want to ask a few questions I just thought of. I am sure he has seen it all. I think the biggest thing for many of us that you can know how to recover and do well and yet not do it. Cause you can't cure an addiction with the head it has to be cured with the heart...........And it is so easy to know what to do and yet not actually FEEL it!! I think the feeling is about letting go and that is hard for many of us. Me for sure..........Dr. Baggs and I talked about that a bit. How you can read every book (which I have) and do tons of research and even work in the field of addiction and still when it is you..........you have to go with the heart and with the feelings or else the knowledge won't help. It has to sink into the skin......and for some of use control freaks that is scary, uncomfortable stuff. Just my thoughts this week.... I am sick as a dog had to come home from work. Terrible cough and my lungs hurt. Had pneumonia twice really bad so when I get sick it always goes to the lungs. I have no apetite and am trying to eat something cause my bottom tummy is growling. THe top tummy doesn't want anything right now. LOL. I think all the coughing is not making my band happy. Faxed the food logs in and gave Kaiser my personal email. MIght be easier than phone calls that always seem to come during work hours when I can't talk. So the coffee and cinnamon twists............and a 100 calorie bag of cookies two nights ago. Still under 900 everyday but I don't think that matters as much as the fact I did it. The salad made me crave sweets really bad last night........today I am craving carbs like crazy!! Salad again? I don't know......... NICOLE: Dr. Jenkins in Auburn will take fill patients too. And the Fill Center was great. They still email me once a week with helpful tips and support group stuff. COCO: ???????? I think I know actually??????? HEATHER: I wanna see your home too!! So exciting!! EVERYONE: Hope all is well!!

Morning all...............Riley layoffs announced at 1:30pm today here too. I am not on the list but my good friends are and I am feeling sad and grateful at the same time. Sorta guilty too. I lost 5 pounds and the restriction has let up just a bit. I am faxing in my food log today. I am stuck again on that number. I am only eating about 600- 900 calories a day so maybe that is it? If I eat more than that I ache down where the band is.............can't complain. I had to remind myself to eat yesterday cause stuff is sitting for a long time in the pouch and the thought of adding anything in is not appealing?? I love it when I am like this!! Love having to remind myself I need to eat three meals. But I do feel it fading out every day. Can't complain about 5 pounds after seven months of bandster hell. But darn it 10 would be nice too.................I go back on June 3, 2010 and have to be down a bit. Today..............hmm. I am thinking about food today and not as tight so I will be sad if the restriction fades out. But than I will get another fill so it will all be good. Guess what started the obession with food..........SALAD last night........of all things!! Could salad be a trigger!! I sure hope not!! CANDRA: I am thinking about the Overeaters annoymous. Seriously. I read through the twelve steps a few days back and realized I have not even conquered 1 in regards to food. So I think it would be very interesting to find out more. I am a Food addict too!! Dr. Baggs was so kind as to let me know that........but I agreed!! LOL. PAM: your kicking butt. You probably one of the reasons I decided to get off my butt and start working it again. Don't wanna be left behind. your gonna be under 200 really soon and I am gonna have to kick butt to get there with you............LOL NICOLE: I sent you the stuff for the fills center. I wish I was a doctor and I could give you a fill!! LOL. But the danger with being able to give fills.........at least to myself.......is that I could cheat!! Hope you and Auds are doing well. NICOLLIE: Wanna hear about the fill center and how you liked it. I liked mine. They just called me yesterday to ask about my weight loss and how I like the doctor. They are good about calling me three days after a fill to see how I am and than a couple weeks after that to check in. Kaiser should do that do but they are just to busy. I am gonna stay with Kaiser and try to work the program with them. I can't afford the fill center right now but I can always go back if I need to which is nice. I talked to them yesterday and they agree I should be with kaiser if i can be. EVERYONE ELSE I MISSED-- I have a meeting and have to get back to work. LOL. Hope you all have a great one.

Woke up hungry and been hungry all day!! I think the fill honeymoon is over now!! The weird thing is the top stomach is FULL but the bottom one is growling. It growled something fierce at the grocery store and everyone turned around to look at me. I know it is the band but how can you tell other people that. I am sure they felt I was ill with some terrible gastrointestinal ailment and should go home quick!! LOL. I feel hungry but the top stomach is full nothing else will fit without a PB incident. Which I refuse to have. I am so scared of PB's and my stomach swelling. But it is a weird feeling. I had to get used to that before and I need to get used to it again. I feel like I have been on a long, long lap band vacation and have to learn some things all over again. Pat: Head hunger is the worst. Psychological addiction is always worse than physical addiction and guess which one we got stuck with?? LOL. This is really hard stuff. A serious mind game. CHRISSYPOP: Don't know you but congrats on the surgery. And that relaxation CD helped alot. I still use it when I can't sleep. LOVE that CD put me to sleep everytime although last time I woke up in the middle to hear something about "little magical creatures are smiling calmly down on you" THat can't be right be right though.........anyone know!! Sorta woke me up cause I thought what am I listening to?? And I am not sure I want magical creatures to smile on me and what are they doing above me............LOL. Someone needs to stay awake all the way through and tell me if that is true. I can't stay awake more than five minutes. Ok gonna try the dinner thing.............