Yoda

Wow. Okay, so this is the perfect example of what happens when people are provided incorrect information and when it is taken “out of context”. I was going to let this go but it disturbs me that folks are jumping to conclusions and making assumptions based on erroneous info. Granted, they were given this "out of context" info in the first place so I can see why this may have happend. Therefore, I wish to clarify. I was the one who pm’d Donna with the so called “negative message”. First of all, the reason I sent her a pm instead of writing my post on this thread was because I did believe that some would think of my belief as being negative and I did not want to start a debate along those lines here on Donna's valid and important thread. However, for whatever reason, Donna decided to choose to share a few words of my post; albeit out of context….resulting in people being misled about what I had said and more importantly ....meant. To clarify, I did NOT say that I thought Donna was not ready due to the fact that she started this thread and asked questions. In no way, shape or form did I say that. For the record, I think it is fantastic that she is using all resources she can to obtain any and all info. What I DID say was that I believed if anyone had to ask the specific question, “is having kids worth it” than I believed they aren’t ready for that step. Lets face it…if someone gets pregnant (unplanned) it is a moot point at that time to ask oneself “is it worth it”?… “oops, maybe I shouldn’t have gotten pregnant because I don’t know if it will all be worth it” (too late!). In my belief (& experience, I might add….for those of you who think “I don’t know what I’m talking about”) once you are at the point of being on the verge of adoption, you KNOW it is worth it. In other words, you know deep in your heart that no matter what….(ie. even with all the downfalls that you may face along the journey of parenthood) it is sooooooo worth it to have a child and you know this in your heart of hearts….therefore….you go through all means to adopt. So, all this to say that what I actually said to Donna was that if you have to ask yourself “is it worth it”…..than perhaps you aren’t as ready as you may think. I believe that you KNOW deep inside that it IS worth it and that is why you want kids in the first place. That is what I said and I meant by my pm. But, you all received a few of my words out of context and jumped to the conclusion that I was some senseless moron who accused Donna of not being ready “in general” because she was asking all these questions in the first place….when in reality I was questioning the fact that she was asking THE paramount question … of “is it worth it”. I actually commend Donna for asking all the other questions and gathering as much info as possible. Of course it is natural to have all those other queries...my "issue" was ONLY with the "worth it" concern. Herein lies the problem: someone asks for advice and I guess I mistakenly thought that meant ALL advice…not just the popular and sugar coated “nice to hear” responses or “this is what I want to hear” advice. I won’t apologize for my honesty; especially when it was requested and not unsolicited. And….please note that my pm was not written in a mean or nasty way at all and I did wish Donna all the best in her Quest with whatever happens. Anyone that chats with me or e-mails/pms me or knows me in any way knows this about me and my character/personality and to assume otherwise on this misguided provision of info is just wrong. Finally, I still stand by my original remark. It is my belief that if one has to question whether kids are “worth it” that they are perhaps not fully ready to go down that road. What is wrong with that statement? It is not (& was not) a negative characterization of Donna or anyone. I understand that some people may not agree with me which is fine…that is why it is called an opinion (which again, I stress was asked for!) but I will wager that many do agree with me. Afterall, why would someone voluntarily choose to go ahead and adopt if they didn’t feel that it would be worth it? Anyways, I merely wanted to clarify my point so that some of you won’t be so quick to make judgements on something for which you don’t have the full story. That being said, despite any replies that may now occur to this post, I won’t see them; I won’t re-visit this thread because if past behaviour I’ve witnessed on other threads comes through and people get unjustly defensive and vindictive, this won't be a thread that will appeal to me. So…on that note….I've said my piece. Donna: as I said before: I wish you luck with this and know you will follow your heart. I hope that from this people will learn two things....1) not to give misguided info on what others have said and 2) not to always jump to conclusions knowing you don't have the full story. Have a good one! :mad:

Good luck tomorrow Jude!!!!! Will be thinkin' of ya.

congrats on your ticker Kim! Thanks for sharing Mandi!!!! I'll take note!! Cloe: another hump....you'll be okay!!!! It is prob better than pre-banding behaviour!

That is AWESOME!!! Congrats!!!

don't worry Squiggle....all those thoughts and anxietys are perfectly normal!!!!

Hey Penni....I sure don't envy you your position. Tough one and only you can make the correct decision for yourself. I know that either way,you will go into it with your eyes wide open and that is the best you can do. If it were me, I would likely chose the Lapband route again and give it another shot (of course, it is easy for me to say this not being in the position you are in). As for the insurance questions, I will plead complete ignorance since I am not American and have no idea!! All that being said, good luck on your journey of decision making!! (oh yeah, and YAY you for maintaining since Jun!!! and it is great you have options now!).

Maaaaaaaaaan, hearing stuff like that (Argon and Loriely) makes me even more sure I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH RESTRICTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You slay me Mandi!!! Cheeeers for you!!! :clap2: :clap2: :clap2:

Okay, in honour of LOVEULOTS17LOV who just got her first job, I thought it would be interesting to say what our first jobs were!!! I'll start.... Other than the obvious babysitting gigs, my first "real" job was at 17 when I got a job at a short lived fast food joint called "Frisco Jacks". It served sourdough with different toppings (not dessert like toppings....but real meal toppings....like chili etc). I was soooo embarrassed when I started working there (it was in an upscale mall to boot!) as I had to wear this BIG ol' BRIGHT RED chef's hat with a matching apron...and sometimes they made me stand out in the mall with a tray of freebies to lure the customers in..... It taught me a lot though and I met a lot of great people!!! However, it also told me that I would never have a career in the food prep or food service industry!!! LOL

VERY inspiring!! THANKS and WELL DONE!!!

pssssst....mine is probably somewhere in Texas now too (hopefully) on it's way to the working stiff's home!

Hi Wheezy...and yes, Welcome!!! You'll feel better soon!!! Be sure to take your pain meds!

LOL @ visual of Dr. pulling out a half eaten child's leg from Neenagh's stomach! ewww

I hear ya Joyce....that is my fear as well. Headlines keep saying that the case has been "solved" and "cracked"> Helooooo...he is merely a suspect!! I hope it will be solved but it certainly isn't yet!

Glad it helped Neenagh. Yes, blending is KEY as well. Foget that shaking thing or stirring with a whisk....put it in a blender and blend 'er up goooood. Then, add your extract and blend again. Then sip away! BTW, your granddaughter is a cutie petutie!

Hmmmm *looks at Neenagh's avatar*.... hmmmm ummmm, aren't you a bit young to get the band?? :nervous

LOL @ Neenagh...maaan your band date can't come soon enough!!!!

I'm hoping that the one I sent will be at its destination sometime next week!!!!! Don't worry, I'll be here lickety split to post a thank you as soon as I get mine!!!

WOW. Thanks for sharing! That is soooo awesome; I'm so very happy that you are doing well and have recovered so quickly!! I'm sure it is still a difficult road....so take it easy on yourself, and ALL THE BEST!!!

I think I know what you are gettng at ratgirl....for the most part yeah, I feel the same (& hope to soon feel better than I did before!!). But...unlike some others, I find I am obsessing about food WAY more than I ever did (but I never really did "obsess" before....and I hope this obesessing goes away eventually). Why am I obsessing? I guess because I find myself thinking all the time about what I can and can't have (ie. as meal times approach) or what I should or shouldn't have...or what I miss....etc etc etc. It seems much more of my life revolves around "thinking" about food now and I really dislike that. But, as I say, I'm hoping after the learning curve is over that this obsession will go away.

I agree dovie....sooo many niggly things that don't add up and if he wasn't involved with the famiy somehow....how could he have known some things (ie. the note as you said, and the layout of the house) etc etc.... That's why I really hope this forensic evidence is a match.... ...and yeah, it will take awhile before all the facts are out....patience is key, I guess...but inquiring minds sure wanna know!!

Welcome to the fray, Lila!!!!! *evil laughter* :biggrin1:

That's why the media is so interesting and sometimes misleading....different reporters report different things. I heard on CNN this morning that it wasn't the parents but some professor at a university who is/was making a documentary on the killing who tipped off the police. Karr had been e-mailing this documentary guy with info etc...and some of the "info" and knowledge he had was stuff he wouldn't/couldn't have had if he weren't involved somehow. So finally this professor guy tipped the police. Maybe after Boulder's press conference today and on Larry King tonight we might find out more solid info.

Sherri: definitely ask to have it checked to see how much is in there. My first fill was 5 ccs and I struggled with no restriction for a few weeks..went back for my second fill and got 2 ccs; still no restriction; on my 3rd fill they found out only 2 ccs were in there....which means the original 5 never went in in the first place!! So here they thought I had 7 ccs when I only had 2 in there!!! So for SURE ask about it. It should be standard practice for them to do that when they do a fill anyways, but unfortunatley that isn't always the case.

Hiya MC! Welcome and congrats on your approval!!!