Oblong

What am I DOING?! I just switched my insurance to Oxford. I have a $5k deductible, and after that, they'll cover 70%, and I'm responsible for 30%. The surgery is $7k. With Oxford, I don't have to jump through so many hoops - all I need is my letter from the PCP, they'll schedule me for surgery, and voila! Size 0, here I come! I had prepped myself for this to happen around the middle of December, but it looks like it'll happen sooner. I'd been doing really well with my food until today, when I had a sort of "farewell meal" today at the Chinese buffet. (I know part of it was because I let myself get too hungry; had Breakfast late, and got myself stressed out.) How is this going to be different from Weight Watchers and every other diet I've been on? And this time it'll cost me a truckload of money, not that I haven't spent a gazillion dollars on weight loss programs, pills, different sized clothes, etc., and I'm STILL FAT. Maybe I'm not supposed to be skinny. What's going to make this time different? I love food. I guess we wouldn't be here if we didn't. I like to eat new things, try new dishes. I like the way soda tastes in my mouth. I like the texture of mashed potatoes. I like sushi, Indian food, international food. I won't be able to eat ever again. I can't have champagne ever again, or Sprite. WHAT AM I DOING?! I would love to be able to sit in an airplane seat, and not have to wear an extender, or feel the arm rest digging into my thighs. I want to be able to wear cute things. And what happens if I do loose the weight? I'm 45; the skin's not going to instantly snap back into place. I'm going to look like a deflated balloon. I just don't know. I want to crawl into a hole, and stay there.:tongue2:

GRRRR! I don't know why, but I'm having the worst time getting my letter of approval for my surgery. It's like my doctor doesn't want to approve it. The group (NJ Bariatrics) is well known in the area. I was scheduled for bloodwork, but NJB doesn't want me to be stuck twice for blood draws if I have to have bloodwork drawn for surgery for them. I should be able to just have the results for that sent to my PCP. When I went to see my PCP (a new doctor for me), I'd explained my history with weight loss, explained why I wanted the lap band, and why I was there to see her - to just get the letter that says yes, my BMI is high enough (268 pounds at 4'11") to need the surgery. SHE wants me to keep a food diary, etc. I'VE DONE THAT ALREADY!! IT DOESN'T WORK!!! Plus I told her I'm already working with the nutritionist at NJB! All I need is the flipping letter from her, and it's like pulling teeth. If diet and exercise was gonna work, I wouldn't be over 100 pounds overweight. Has anybody had any probems getting their letter from their PCP? Should I go to another doctor? I don't see what the problem is.:eek:

I went to the new doctor, who did his exam, gave me an EKG, and wants me to see a cardiologist for a stress test because he saw ST-T wave changes. So now, yet ANOTHER delay. He also thinks my lung capacity may have shrunk because of my weight... Or that I have asthma. I've NEVER been diagnosed with asthma, so I'm not really paying attention to that. Feeling a bit discouraged today. It seems like this will never happen now. :-(

Well, I'm switching doctors. I faxed over what NJB needed, and told the doctor that if she had no intention of giving me the letter, to please let me know. I gave her till the end of business yesterday to get back to me, and told her if I didn't hear from her, I was cancelling my appoinment. I didn't hear from her. I called, cancelled my Monday appointment, and schedule one with another doctor for Monday. Wish me luck! Hopefully I'll have my letter by this time next week!

:eek: Hello, all. After being a professional dieter since the age of 12, I've finally decided on getting the lap band. I'm 4' 11", and weigh 268 pounds. (God, it hurts to type that! And I thought I was fat at 118 when I was 18! This is the heaviest I've ever been.). I've done WW to DEATH and through several incarnations, I did the Oxford Diet in college. I did Atkins just before my wedding and was able to get to a point where I didn't look like a HOUSE in my wedding dress (I wish I could have been the perfect size 6 and looked better for my husband!), and diet pills and starvation diets. I must have lost 1,000 pounds over my life, and I'm 45. This is my last resort. I want to be able to eat like a normal person, and not worry about my weight. I would LOVE to be able to go into a store, pull something off the rack, and not have it look like a tent. I caught my mother looking at me the other day, and shaking her head in disgust. The weight just doesn't stay off. I know what to do and how to do it, but it just doesn't work. So it's either this, or wiring my mouth shut. I know surgery carries risks, and the dying part doesn't scare me. I lost my husband last year after only a year and a half of marriage, so I'd get to see him. What I don't want are complications that'll be permanent. I actually was sent to the complications thread on this website when I told someone I was thinking about LB surgery, and she said, "OMG! Don't do it!! It's too risky!!!" But I know a friend of mine who's had her band for about a month, and her husband was banded about a year/year and a half ago, and all seems to be fine. SO, here I am. I've just switched insurance so that I can get the bulk of this covered (I got Oxford), started with my food diary, and I'll hopefully have the surgery by the end of the year. AAAGGGGHHH!!! Anyway... Hi!:w00t:

I actually switched from BCBSNJ to Oxford because they would NOT cover my surgery with the particular plan I had. The insurance coordinator at my surgical center suggested them to me. I just hope they cover enough (Oxford) so that I can afford it.