Kat817

I began in a 46DDD or E, and after my weight loss, I am in a 38DD. There does not seem to be a lot of change in the cup size overall----minimal at best. For a long time I stayed in the DDD cup size, and in some bras I still take it, but the band size has changed dramatically, all the back fat and side boobs went away---YAY!!!! I would not complain with what happen to mine. I always joke that I went from a 46DDD to a 38 Long, but it really hasn't happen, I am just not built that way, bigger around, than long....so it has not affected cup size much. Kat Kat

I only have 8 or 10 letters depending.....wait let me count-If I am in trouble I have 13!!! If I use Kathleen!!! LOL Believe me being called Kathleen, was never good luck, I was always in trouble....or once I got married! I have 1 person in this world who calls me Kathleen and that is my old 3rd-4th grade Sunday School teacher, she STILL calls me Kathleen, everyone else calls me Kathy, Kat, Kitty or Sis!! And Rick calls me Woman!! LMAO! Well Pamela is probably feeling no pain by now-------she is a partyin' down!!! TracyKS, that story about the boyscouts, just made me cry. What a horrible thing to happen, I cannot believe it barely missed happening again! That is so sad, and scary! I am thankful you and yours are ok....it could have been bad. We were high 80's today, but no wind, so we are going riding again after work, 4th day in a row, I love it!! I think I have a house guest tonight, and it might be kinda wierd! A couple of weeks ago, Becky brought home a kitten from work, and her DH was unhappy, saying they did not need another cat. He has 2 big dogs, and they have an old cat....but, all the animals have adjusted, and life went on....until last night. Gary come in from the field working, and brough home a baby bull snake. Becky was furious! They argued I guess most of the evening, and he was going to supposedly take it back out when he went today, and they got up and it had escaped the aquarium. So she told him until he can show her the snake to prove he found it, she is not setting foot in the house. I love Becky, but I hope he finds it quickly. I am worried it went into the vents----they have a big house, he may NEVER find it! BUT....I too would avoid the house. Laura you might like them, but I am a chicken-------and snakes EAT chickens! Jane----glad to hear there is not muscle damage to your heart, there are so many things they can do for the rate fluctuations, from medications to ablation, that it sounds like they will watch you closely, I look forward to hearing the results of your holter. Please let us know. We went to the bookstore today, and Kinsey left her baby doll behind, so guess I will go back tomorrow....always something with that kiddo! Suzanne, I'll have a margi with ya--surprise me with the flavor!!! Well, I am going to go unpack the junk I bought...will check back later! Kat

:party:Terry-------HAPPY BIRTHDAY my friend, I hope it is happy and as wonderful as you are.....enjoy your beads, it has been such fun planning a surprise for you.....we love you lots, you are a Violet to be treasured.....((((hugs)))) Kat

I too have to be up at 5.......when Kinsey gets here, she goes back to sleep, but I seldom do----if I do, then I am not ready to go to bed when Rick is which is in about 5 minutes!!! We had a nice ride, and son was on good behaviour, he has decided I might not be an evil step monster after all, at least he hugged me hello, and told me he loved me when he left, so he is being normal, just VERY stressed over the car deal.....sure hope it all works out for them. If the wind had stayed down it would have been better.....but it was still nice. Come home and had some dinner, and a slice of watermelon, which is sitting heavy in my stomach, not feeling like it wants to go anywhere, anytime soon. Not much on the agenda for tomorrow....at least not yet! Terry, I too will wish you an early birthday, as I will be snoozing soundly when midnight rolls around, at least I hope to be!!! TracyKS---you feeling any better? Will see y'all in the morning, on Friday the 13th.......leave it to Terry to have a memorable day for her 50th!!! Nighty night girls! Kat

Will be thinking of you tomorrow Frangi----you will do wonderfully!! Look forward to the news you too are out of surgery!! It will go by fast, can you believe mine was over 3 weeks ago???? Kat

Yay!!! So glad you are through the surgery part Becky---please be sure to thank your sister for letting us know. I tried to get my DH to do it, and the board just confused the hell outta him, or so he let me believe!!!! Rest up! Kat

I'm home, and beat! My Mom shopped her heart out!!! We bought several outfits, and tops, and a couple of pants, and a pair of sandals, and a pair of tenny shoes....and some sunglasses, and a nightgown, oh and some make up-------we hit every place in the mall. Kinsey was not on her best behaviour....she wasn't "bad" she was just curious, and wanted to touch everything, and go look at this and that, and had to go potty 10,000 times.....I am tired!!! So tonight we are supposed to go riding with my son....so far he is the only one still not speaking to me. But right now he is madder at his wife than me.....and after tonight, I will be #1 on his list again!!! They are fighting because he says she got scammed on a car they bought on ebay-----key word being they but somehow now that it is a problem, it is all her fault, because they only had to buy a car because she wrecked the other one. So I am gonna butt in tonight!!! I feel like causing havoc!!! LOL I love him dearly, but there is not a doubt in my mind, my son can be a true male chauvenist, and a total ass.....but he is my chauvenistic ass son.....so, I can say it!!! TracyKS.....until your last sentence, about Aunt Flo, I kept thinking OMG she is pregnant!!! I know Robby was a miracle child, but major weight loss, can sometimes reverse infertility!! So when I read that, there went that idea----hope you feel better soon!!!! OMG you guys should see the teeny tiny size 0 sandals I bought for the baby across the street, they are the cutest little shoes I have ever seen! Yeah NM is hot----but I am cold.....it has been 90+ for days, and I have used the AC in the car, but not at the house, I am always cold, and this place is so well insulated it has never even reached 75 in here, so I stay cold!! We use a swamp cooler, but it can get it cold enough in here to grow icicles off of places icicles don't belong!!! It is not unusual for us to hit 100 and stay there for days on end---but we have not gone above 95 yet this year. The comment on there about the wind feeling like a hair dryer is sooooo true!!! Here, even if it is hot, and the wind blows, the wind is cooler-----not in Comanche---it blows hot air, took me forever to get used to that!!! So are we all going to call Terry at midnight to remind her she is getting older??? LOL Just kidding Terry, we wouldn't do that----would we? Hoping to get Manda over here this weekend to do my pics, and pull that one from Terry's group for me! Will really try to get it done, and have her take a picture of me....such fun! Well I gotta go get geared up.....long pants, boots....hair up....not thinking it sounds like much fun now, but once we get going it will be wonderful. I forgot to tell you my Dr. told me to give it another 7-10 days before getting in the saddle again, he was worried about mounting....I have a horse I can pop on from a fence, so I might push his time line up just a little, not a lot but I wanna go!!! I had a friend pass away in TX while I was there, and I didn't know it! This was a woman who taught Kindergarten when Manda was in K--but another class, and we got to be friends, and through the years we kept in touch, her DD and Manda are friends. She was diagnosed with ALS several years ago. She moved to Arizona to be near a huge clinic, and had a great life there. Lots of activities through this clinic/center. Then about 4 years ago her DH was transferred and they went to Big Springs TX. She had hell, no Dr.'s up on current protocol etc. She was progressing pretty rapidly then, and was down to using a letter board to communicate from a wheelchair. So one of her DD's relocated to be near her, and then not long after the DD and her husband got there, got jobs, bought a home etc. My friends DH was coming home one night and was hit on his motorcycle and killed. So she was there, with her kids having relocated etc. alone. She was put onto oxygen 3 days before she died, the muscles to breath were finally taken away, along with her ability to swallow. It is such a horrid disease. I am glad her journey with it is over....I feel so bad for her DD's. Her other DD and her partner, are trying to convince the other sister to move one more time, since they are now all each other has....they want to be together. If you would remember Darrel's daughters in your prayers, I would appreciate it. Better go get changed......time to ride! Kat

Well good morning all!! I am off to take my Mom shopping today--Pat you will pleased to know I am making this a MOM day----focus is all hers!!! Shopping, mani, pedi----spoil her all I can! Thanks for the heads up!!! Betty---years ago, (lotsa years!!!) when I was a young teenager, I heard my Grandma (Moms mom) and my Dad discussing something about forgiving. She said "When you forgive a man his sins, you do not reheat them for his breakfast"--my Dad laughed and agreed, saying he sure was glad she taught my Mom that lesson. And jokingly ask if I was listening. I said yes, but that made no sense. So they explained how unfair it is to say you forgive something, then use it as amunition at a later date. That when something is over, it is over. Through the years, I have without question done my share of throwing old hurts into someones face....but that quote is still burned into my brain, and I seriously try to live by it. Way back when Rick and I were dating, it come up, and he said his ex could recall, and name every single thing he had ever done wrong, and did so regularly. So I decided then and there, not to ever do that---and he on his own even---actually noticed!! He has never brought anything up to me after it happens, he works it through and it is over....working it through sometimes takes awhile!!! He told our son one time something and brought up some other infraction he had commited---which were frequent for awhile! He said it even felt wrong then!!! I would hate to lay in wait for him to hit me with my screw up again.......especially this one! LOL I want a pool.......so now I am going to go pout!!! LOL, seriously, Mom called and is ready, so I gotta run....will pop in later to catch up with the rest of you girls!!! Hugs~~! Kat

Cookie, you have made an excellent point.....typing in a forum such as this, it is more than difficult to make ones point without it coming out sounding harsher or even sounding flip ---not what you intended when typing it. It has happened to me often. When you cannot make eye contact, or see body language, it is much harder to make a point in the way you meant it to be. I hope that you make some progress finding out what the problem is that is causing your reflux even unfilled. I know my own situation, is that I had serious reflux prior, to surgery, and a hiatal hernia was repaired during surgery--and that last a few months, but returned. We did the swallow studies, and my band is working, it does not seem to affect the reflux....meaning, my diet does not make a difference, nothing does. Ends up I have herniated again. This does not surprise me! Both of my parents have the hiatal hernias, neither are banded, nor any other WLS in their history. My Mom has had surgery on hers, only to do just as I did, and it happen again. If I take my Prilosec, and sleep on a wedge pillow, on my side, and avoid evening food--I do ok. The thing is, I fully believe with all my heart----it would be this way even without my band. It was this way before it! So.....hoping they find a cause and a help for you, and that you can begin working your band again since it has proved to be successful for you. I personally know I am guilty of lumping people and posts together...a comment here and a comment there, and I lump them together unfairly. Sorry if I did this to you..... I believe when a thread is something that makes you uncomfortable, then ignore it. I would not leave anyplace that brought me pleasure and happiness, because of one section, or one person. This is a big site, plenty of room for everyone. Kat

Suzanne, the key in the math question was the wording the "By" half as opposed to "In" half. You obviously did not have the 8th grade math teacher I did.....he loved screwing with us over word problems, there were times I thought my Dad (who was a Math professor for awhile---before he gave up on the next generation!) was going to go to the school and throttle the teacher!!! He seriously took pleasure in outsmarting us----and the only thing I really learned is to never trust a word problem!!! LOL The first couple of questions put me on guard, or I would not have gotten the rest, and as it was I was questionable on one, and cannot remember which one it was, but got it right apparantly!!! Today I am taking my Mom shopping. She has a list, because Dad told her that it was ridiculous her saying she wanted clothes, that if she wants clothes to go buy them! She is really bad about doing for everyone but herself....so she is planning to buy shoes, and clothes.....this could be fun!! So this friend of mine from my NJ thread, is telling me, she does not think she is depressed, she is just tired of being the caretaker, and the peacekeeper--and making sure everyone has everything but her, she wants some ME time. She is a bit older than I am, and it made me wonder if my Mom who has been getting in "these moods" was feeling the same way. SoI have really made an effort not to dump my problems on her, and to move the conversation to her more often, ask her opinion without her help. This special shopping trip JUST FOR HER, on her birthday---and she is loving it! So today I will be the Gopher .... I will stand outside the changing room door and gopher other sizes or styles or whatever!!! I didn't do great on CTCD yesterday.....I ended up eating a small piece of cake. But even felt victorious with that because there is a big plate full in the kitchen, and I ate a little piece and was done! Michelle, you saying you love to remember Pamela pronouncing Susanne.....makes me laugh remembering when I ask in the kitchen if anyone had heard her say it, because someone referred to her like our Suzanne here--pronunciation wise, I mean. Everyone freaked out thought I had heard Pamela refer to her with a bad name.....and all I meant was it is pronounced differently than they thought. The looks on everyones face was priceless!!! I love having those memories!!! Pamela, I am glad Susanne (said the right way in my head) is going to be home soon, I wondered how you were doing, you have kept yourself very busy I noticed. Bet you are ready for some quiet home time, when home is not so lonely!! We used to have end of school parties here, I miss it!!! We would have Water games, and water fights in the yard, we found that those big car washing sponges were much better than water balloons!!! We would fill the wading pools with water, and you can dip and throw, and not hurt anyone, no filling and tying, it was such fun. We would order pizza, and have an ice cream sudae bar. Manda and I were talking about it the other day, she said she plans on continuing it with Kinsey. Well Kinsey has finally woke up, so I need to get us ready to go pick up the Birthday Nana she says! Everyone have a great day..... Kat

Well here it is another day, and thankfully a much better day! My DH come in, and simply showed me yet another reason to love him like I do, he did not say a word, just opened his arms. We have totally different ways of dealing with issues, I rant and rave and have to talk it to death, and he withdraws into himself, and works it through in his mind, finding a logical reason for what was said or done, and he makes peace with it---often times never saying a word. I totally HATE that! I do not deal well with the unknown, so I want to hear what he is thinking, I want to hear his reasoning....and he simply does not care to discuss it, he says doing so always leads to other arguements, and so then we fight about how to fight!! Well yesterday when I was in such a horrible place.....I read a thread began while I was in Texas by one of the Shrinking Violets called Forgiveness. In it, was a section about if you are the one needing to be forgiven. And without question that was me. I said horrible, mean hurtful things---and knew even as I said them that they were not true----but.....no excuses. Anyway the article said, if you were needing forgiven, to allow the person to do it on their own, not to force them to relive a hurt, to make yourself feel better. It said all kinds of things that felt like it was talking straight to me! So I said a little prayer, and went with that, let him guide me.....I did not call to tell him my excuse for saying this, or a backup for why I said that, or simply to hear his voice because I was scared. I let him work through it. He come home, and he still loves me in spite of my Bitch Outburst. I know it still hurts him, but he does understand that I really have been stressed....between the surgery, and even going to Texas and spending sooooo much time with just his Mom. So today I had my Dr.'s appt. and while I was in the waiting room, I got these visual disturbances I used to get with my migraines. I did it last week too. I have not had migraines since my hysterectomy, except for a couple the first month after I was banded. My migraines have always been from estrogen surges. So I ask him about it today, and he said it is pretty common, that especially with my fat necrosis issues, I am probably getting a pretty big hormone surge in my body....he said it will be a week or 2 of PMS type of mood swings. I dared to look up at Rick and he had this half smirk on his face, like "No shit?" So he has not said anything to me about it, but he is loving, and is back to himself. I am VERY VERY lucky. My infection is still there. I am on another round of antibiotics, and see him again on the 23rd. He said it is looking good, and the drainage is actually not a bad thing, that it is keeping the infection from building on the inside.....so let it drain, and if this round of meds does not kick it, we will put in a PIC line, and hit it twice a day with IV antibiotics. I do not want that!!! So thinking positive! I got a wonderful, helpful PM from Pat--she is so great!!! I wish I had a pool----and I wish I was rich, I would go to Sherry's party just to shock her!!! LOL, instead I guess I was born just incredibly beautiful---LMAO!!!!! Sherry, sorry you are going through so much with your accident! Mandy, are you still feeling ok following yours?? Not long after Rick got home last night, one of his guys called and he had locked his keys in the truck. So he had to go get the spares at work----and ask me if I wanted to go. We decided to ride, and it was absolutely perfect riding weather, no wind, warm, but not hot, not cold. And it also allowed us some time to "be" with one another, and close enough to touch----I tend to rub his shoulders when we ride--he throws a hand over my leg, and rubs my calf! But it is not exactly conducive at 60 mph to be talking.....which was probably good!! But it was such a perfect ride, we hoped to do it again tonight, and the wind is roaring! Dammit! Jessica I keep meaning to tell you how great your new avitar looks----you look wonderful!!! Diane---where ya at today??? Well I better go get some things started for dinner, I planned to grill---will take a chance and see what I can burn down in the wind!!! Talk to y'all soon! Thanks so much for the support! Kat

I figure you are talking about the quiz Pamela linked.....remind me what #6 was.......! Kat

Some fonts, especially the script fonts come through in teeeeeeeny tiny size. I am on a 21" flat screen LCD monitor, and it come through dang near impossible to see with my poor old eyes!!!! Kat

From an April 2006'er to an April 2008'er......CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! What an amazing group of NSV's!!!! My question is, how can any Dr. look at that and not be supportive of this surgery??? When I was banded I was taking 2 meds for high blood pressure, taking Metformin for high blood sugar, and had been on cholesterol meds (they sent my liver enzymes soaring though!) and anti inflamatories for my aching knees........and now I do not take a single prescription medication!!!! Well right now that is a lie! I am on some antibiotics following my TT--and you should have seen the look on my pharmacists face when he saw me!!! He told me, he figured we had gone to mail order prescription service.....I told him nope we got rid of the Rx's altogether!!! He was shocked by my change!!! YAY us!!! Keep up the GREAT work!!!! Kat

I think at 19, if you are prepared to do the work involved and deal with the occasional highs and lows that the band --or most any --WLS brings with it, then you are old enough! I personally think getting control on your weight when you are young is IDEAL! I wish I could have done this years ago! If you are properly using your band, and as you lose weight you will learn better eating habits, better exercise habits----and those are lessons that will benefit you your entire life, and it can be a life that does not sideline you due to your weight. Personally, my band has been a huge success. I have so much better eating habits now! Plus it has allowed me to discover how eating certain things does affect my body differently. If I make a meal out of a Protein source and some veggies, or a salad.....I can be full for hours. Even banded though, if I make a meal out of something high in carbs.....say mac and cheese---it does not keep me full for very long, and it kicks my cravings into high gear!!! Now that does not mean, I do not eat mac and cheese, it means when I do, I know I need to have something like a cheese wedge ready to eat when I get the munchies later....because I will!!! And I know to tell myself, I am not hungry, it is my body reacting to the carbs----so I am better able to control it! I just sat here reading the last few posts, and seriously laughed out loud! I was eating a small piece of cake as I read the post about not eating cake!!! I am not supposed to be eating it today, a group of us are avoiding junk food-----but the neighbor brought it to me....so I took a few nibbles!!! That was enough! I do not want to eat the whole piece, let alone a whole cake, which I would have wanted to before. But 2 years later, this band and my new habits, have given me a whole new way of eating.....and I do not feel deprived in any way....I eat everything, just in different amounts, and in different ways. You have to have dedication to it though because that does not come right away. Chewing is KEY!!! You must chew your food well! It allows our body with a band to process the food. It also allows you to truly --I mean REALLY--taste what you are eating. Many highly processed sugary, or fatty foods, are really good, until you really chew it, and it is nasty!!! Most of them end up feeling like you are chewing a mouth full of lard!!! It changes how you feel about foods! I am not sure even a 16 year old could not handle the surgery---the problem I have with 16 year olds, is it is often a decision made by a judgemental parent pushing a child that they see having a problem. That is wrong on so many levels, and could be the cause of the child being obese in the first place! Take control while your young though, and enjoy your life--don't waste years being obese if you do not have too. Kat

I self paid---and do not regret it for a second. I love my band and what it has changed in my life. My only thing I would change, is I wish at times I had used the $$$ to pay for an attorney to battle the insurance for me, they were being horrible, and mine should have been covered. But however it happen, it has been WELL worth it! I was banded in Mexicali, MX, and paid $$7740.00. But that was over 2 years ago.... Kat

Say it? Try living it! Ay yi yi!!!!!! I DID discuss it with my Dr. this morning, he said it is normal! I would have opted not to talk to him about it, but I had eye issues, like I was trying to get a migraine as I waited to be called to be seen. I used to get them regularly, anytime I had an estrogen surge, but since the hysterectomy the only ones I have had were in the 2 months following being banded. He said this fat necrosis, is likely causing estrogen surges---just friggin' wonderful.......hide the guns! My infection is still present, not worse, but not better by much either. So.....another round of antibiotics and see him on the 23rd. He said while it is not ideal, the drainage with infection is perfect, it is not building in the incision, or inside my body, it is just not ready to heal yet.....so 10 days, if it does not go away then.....then we get mean with it he said and I get a PIC line, and twice a day hit it with IV antibiotics. I do not want that.....so this round of pills will fix me, I am thinking positive.....for now! Wait a sec and that may change!! He said I could drop to a waist high compression if my belly button can handle the waist pressure. It is still tender, so going to leave the high waisted ones on during the day and go less at night. I was down a whopping half a pound from when I saw him last, but he did say I have an easy 5-8 pounds of fluid retention remaining....he pointed out dimples and swellings, and said it would all go away-----I loved him right then!!! Well......I am wanting food.......so have to find something that is not crap!!! LOL I'll check in later---hugs~ Kat

All of the newer bands are larger. It is less stress on the stomach my Dr. said. If you think about it, it makes sense. I understand it does take a bit longer to get to proper fill level, but if it is safer, it is well worth it!! Mine is the old Inamed band, but it works for me, and I am not talking bad about it!! As for my Tummy Tuck, yes it was covered by insurance, because it was deemed a medical necessity, due to skin tears under the apron of skin, and I had a long history of documentation with problems concerning it. I think your latest addition, concerning eating more than a couple of bites is very important. I agree eating a healthy, normal amount of food is key! I have always been able to eat....when someone is full off of 2 bites, I would consider that too tight, and you are not getting enough nutrition to support your body. I know we are using restriction as a method of weight reduction, but if you cannot eat healthy amounts or eat healthy foods, then, the weight you are losing is not a healthy weight loss. Our body requires food to fuel it to operate --- what we choose to feed it, makes a huge difference!! You would have thought I would have figured that out years ago!!!! Better Late than Never! Kat

Poor Tracy, first she was addicted to food.....she kicked that!!! Then she was still addiced to cigarettes....she kicked that!!! Now those damned MJC's........ya gotta kick the habit girl!!! But then again, my heart feels so happy this morning I might try one to celebrate with you!!! But oh yeah, I don't like coffee!!! Not laughing at you, just with you......ever try making something similar at home, that would be good for you as a meal replacement.....someone mentioned a protein shake they thought was similar.........nah would never work. I say use them for rewards!! But like I say I am a bit giddy today!!! I am out the door to the Dr. Then to the bookstore, then to lunch with my friend Marie. Mom and I are going tomorrow, going to spend her actual birthday together. A friend from another thread gave me some insight to dealing with my Mom and my MIL a bit better, gonna put it to the test!!! Well maybe with MIL if she ever talks to me again!!! BBL~~ Kat

What did I ever do? How did I ever cope? I cannot imagine life without my Violets now. I love you all and thank you so much for the love and concern during my breakdown. I knew I could pick up the phone and call any one of you and I thought about it---but talking about it was not an option, the emotions were too close to the surface. Rick once again showed me further reason to love him, he come in, did not say a word, just looked at me and opened his arms. No recriminations. I have to say if you have not read Terry's thread on forgiveness, you need to go read the article she printed in there. Terry, things would not be where they are without the article, I told you yesterday, how much I needed that just then, I truly mean that. Like you Tracy, I am a get it out and get it done kind of person, Rick is not. Never has been, and I know that about him, but tend to try to force the issue. One of the items in the article Terry posted, said something to the effect, of not bringing things up again if it is just to help yourself, if it is going to re open the hurt for the other person. Don't rub salt in their wound to ease your own hurt. I had sooooo many excuses! I wanted to defend myself---but the fact remained the words come out of my mouth, and into his heart, and whether I am stressed or not, or have a mini point here or there, it isn't going to change the pain he felt on hearing the words, so letting them go away as opposed to reminding him of them every time I turned around yesterday, I did as it said, and let his hurt guide me.....Thank you so much Terry. The family is still not speaking to me.....not sure how I want to handle that. Going to think on it for a day or so, see if it too will mellow with some time. Rick is not a cruel man, he is not going to keep this buried and hit me with it in 6 weeks--------he talked through a lot of it with a friend I know, I heard his take on it this morning. This friend is a guy he works with, and his wife had a TT just over a year ago, and she too ended up with infection, and all along Rick keeps telling me it is ok.....that Dennis' wife did this too, and he said hers looked really bad, and now looks normal. Every step he tells me she did that too! This morning the only referral to anything was Rick telling me he would meet me at the Dr. and according to Dennis (his friend) mood swings and unsteady emotions are pretty normal following anethesia, and he was sorry he had not been more understanding over the stress I am dealing with over being infected. And you know--one of the times I had to fight myself not to pick up the phone and extend the arguement was to tell him he had no idea how stressed I was, and how much I needed him home, which was part of why I blew up. I am so grateful that Dennis said similar things, I want Rick to know there were extenuating circumstances.....I am not the horrid person I was for the 2-3 minutes it took me to blow things up. It also seriously eases my mind to know that apparantly his wife too had some outbursts! I scared myself. If I had handled things MY way, we would have resurrected this over and over yesterday, and only succeeded in adding issues, and continuing the hurt. But after reading that, I did my level best to allow Rick to set the pace, and let him decide whether to forgive me, rather than trying to force him into at least saying he did....and I prayed, for him to see his way to forgive me (!) and also for strength and guidance not to do that again! It was harder than I know how to say, not to pick up the phone just to hear his voice, even if it was mad at me. I KNOW I would have without that article.....Terry began the thread while I was gone. I believe it was divine intervention that it popped up where I saw it when I did. My Mom has Kinsey, so I can do the Dr. Not sure if I am meeting her in town to do her shopping or not. Tomorrow is my Moms birthday. I finally just ASK her what she would like! She said she would like to get another outfit for this upcoming reunion. So, we are just going to go shopping, and let her pick it out....my treat. I would love to be able to know her size, and pick it out, with all the trimmings and surprise her, but that isn't gonna happen, with sizes all over the place like they are, so....we will shop together. I looked through Terry's pics....I wanna do it again too!!! And I have to say, I decided it is going to have to be a goal, to try to get a bad (for future blackmailing ya know) picture of Haydee! Girl you have to be the most photgenic person, you are ALWAYS beautiful!!! She never seems caught in mid sentence, with her eyes half closed and her mouth hanging open--the shot I do so well!!! Laura----or Judy------or some photo capable person........HELP! I want either the first or the last pic in Terry's set......the ones of all of us, made into a small enough pic I can replace my picture and use it in my signature. Mine of all of us is not as good. Can someone help me?? I am scared to see the Dr. this morning. His opening it up last time was a bit unpleasant, but since it is still problematic, I don't know what to expect, and I hate the unknown!!! I wanna skip it and go to lunch with Terry and Haydee. Isn't today when y'all are meeting and eating?? So far so good for me, made it through yesterday CTCD, and so far today I ate watermelon for breakfast! Going to try to keep myself in check! Well.......enough rambling. Again, thank you all, your love and concern went straight to my heart, and helped more than you know. ((((((((hugs))))))))))) Kat

I have my Gruene pics on disc, but have not loaded them onto the computer yet, and I don't have a photobucket account, was going to get Manda to do that. Then maybe she can tell me how to do the disc from our water pics. As for before and after TT pics, I have not done an after, want my infection to clear first--it is kinda ooky looking. And my befores are done in the middle of the night, the night before surgery, in the mirror in the playroom!!! They are pretty pathetic. When I get them I will email them to all of you, but on the site I am using my original before and a new after, not showing the nudity!!! Maybe soon Rick will be willing to take my picture....we'll see, so far we have not spoke of things, and it is icy.......and now I know he discussed it with our son, which is not fair, because none of the family is speaking to me....Now to be fair, we had this out while he and our son were together, and he was VERY hurt by what I said, and being a man, the hurt eventually turned to anger, and he of course vented, but it went from him to the DIL, and right to the MIL which was part of the whole issue......now no one is speaking to me. I entertained the idea of just disappearing----seeing if it made a difference---but figured that was cowardly! Tempting just the same. I admit fault, I expect to have a little understanding and some forgiving for a temper tantrum, but it is not forthcoming!!!! I am upset, I want to get mad in return, but I can't----I fully accept responsibility for what I said, I can only be upset, and sad, and somewhat scared, that what we had cannot be regained. I have never seen him like this. My insides feel cold. But ironically in the past this sort of thing would have had me eating everything in sight, and now I can hardly stomach anything. Wierd changes. I got this new compression thing, and it has had me with a wierd pain all day, I just realized, it is not muscle related, I think it is my port, having pressure put on it. Will ask him in the morning. Well I am off to fix some dinner, it is yet to be seen if it will be eaten!! Check in later! Kat

I know I am not the one you directed your question to regarding band size and fills...but thought I'd toss my answers in. I have the small band---a 9.75 ml, which can hold a max of 4cc.'s. I had 2 fills-totalling 1.75cc.'s, to lose my weight, with the last one being almost 2 years ago. I lost steady--not real fast, but losing! I continued to see my band Dr. and be checked out, weighed in, and followed up, just did not care to be super tight, and refused another fill, until I quit losing. I had a total unfill a month ago, so I could have my Tummy Tuck done 3 weeks ago. My hunger has not returned, but if I am not very cautious, I can overeat, what I know I should. All that being said, I have heard nothing but good things about the new larger band, they say it takes longer to get restriction, but it is healthier for your body, and has less complications--all good things! Kat

YAY---I took Pamela's quiz and scored 11 out of 11---it says I am genius, and my love life should follow. I know better....no genius here, or I would learn to shut my mouth! Laura, way to go on the NSV! How did Mom take it??? You looked great, no one would know you were having the trip from hell. I have done ok eating--skipped breakfast, my stomach was too tore up. Had half a tuna salad sandwich for lunch---was going to just eat the salad, but wanted Kinsey to eat a sandwich, so it was easier! Then we had some watermelon----but before I ate the watermelon, I was picking up around the house, and grabbed my bag of chocolate/toffee covered pecans I brought home from TX---and I sat down here to munch and eat, and saw a post saying something about CTCD--and went Oh yeah!!! So put them away and got the watermelon---we each had a small piece and I am stuffed. Even with no fill it is a slow eating, small amount food. I love it too!!! But I avoided the candy. I drank a bottle of water and a bottle of cherry limeade crystal light wannabee. So far so good. Dinner will not be diet, but I won't gorge myself, and since it is food, not junk, will consider it ok! Tracy the Sonic no longer has the MJC---it went away when the month changed. NO? Well, I tried!!!! LOL Kat

I loved your post!!! I come in expecting to find something totally different!! I often point out to newbies concerned about how many complications they are reading about, that when people are having yet another good day they do not always start threads saying so!!! I am thrilled that you did just that!!! I too met with success using my band! Do I worry at times about the future? Of course! But I decided even in the worst case scenario, something should happen and I would lose my band---I have a whole new place to begin! I have learned soooo much in regards to how to eat the proper foods, and how eating them really does affect my body, my hunger and my future cravings! I have learned HUGE amounts about portion control! Would it be hard without the band, heck yeah! BUT---I am armed with knowledge and support I did not have before! I would also be going into it without over a hundred pounds to lose! It would not be so intimidating! Furthermore, I have given my body a health break! I have not tortured it with high blood pressure, or high blood sugar or high cholesterol for 2 years and going strong.....every day I treat my body right, I have gained life! And as you have said, learning to love yourself again is a bonus in and of itself. Not something often referred to when discussing whether to be banded or not! And the friendships developed here, are invaluable! Just last month 11 of us met in Texas, and had such a good time, we are already planning our next meet up! Never would we have gotten together without being banded, I treasure those friendships! We have all met with varying degrees of success, but I feel confident in saying we would ALL do it again! I personally want to thank you for bringing such a positive experience to light, and I wish you continued success and happiness. Long Live our Bands!! Kat

Turning up nicely.....makes me think of a turned up nose, and just wanted to clarify, it is NOT that lifted!!!! LOL!!! Kat