Kat817

Talking about fires....and confessions.....years ago, many, many years ago (!) my Mom worked for the local sherrifs office as a dispatcher. They also dispatched the local volunteer fire dept. She worked the midnight to 8AM shift, and my Dad left for work about 7:30. It took Mom less than 4 minutes to get from home to work, but my brother who was 2 years younger than I, were alone for that 35 minutes or so everyday. We were 9 & 7. We lived in a very old house that had floor furnaces. He and I began scuffling and fighting as usual one morning and kicked a balloon into the furnace and it caught fire! He refused to leave, as flames flew up from the furnace! He sat there eating his Cheerios. So I grabbed the dog and run to the neighbors. Of course by the time I got there, I had no idea how the fire started!!! Confession!!!! So the neighbor calls the fire in, this was before 911. My Mom gets the call, and she dispatched the fire squads etc. and it wasn't until she was writing it in the log book she realized she just dispatched fire units to her own house!!! So she got a jailer to take over and flew out of the office, almost run over the Sheriff! Meanwhile the fire trucks are arriving, and one ends up sideswiping the one already there, causing several thousands of dollars in damage! I hear one of the firemen say the fire is out. My brother dumped his cheerios milk on it...talk about stink!!! About then my Mom comes flying in!!! She sees all the trucks, and was hysterical. In reality there was never much of a fire, just a scaredy Kat me!!!! LOL By the next morning we had a mean ass neighbor who come and sat with us as we got ready for school!!! No more fires tho!!! Kat

Been busy stitching away on a plastic canvas thing for Kinsey. It is just a simple earring holder. All she wears are tiny little post earrings, and when they are all in the jewelry box, they are all but impossible to tell apart. So, I am making this to hang them on. her bedroom set is orchid with hot pink stars---so I am stitching this the same, and have a few new pairs of earrings to put on it. I only started it so I know I won't have it ready for Christmas, but----will have it for her soon. Jane, hope you are feeling better, and that your health is improving, I just worry about you. And don't you know it is not fair you lying in bed this close to Christmas!! Sorry! I know you would prefer to be running around doing all the little things too. Wish we could all take turns taking your place for awhile! How's that!? Wind is picking up outside, it is blowing our storm in. Snow overnight, and through Tuesday, then Another storm to hit Wed. night they said. Looks like it is a white Christmas in the making! A few days ago I got a phone call from my former DIL. She said my granddaughter was asking about her Dad and she was wanting to get in touch with my son! I told him, and he didn't react like I hoped he would, he was hesitant. Finally today he called her, and he talked to his daughter. And then tonight he went to see her, and we have not heard anything. I am so excited!!! It is causing friction in his marriage I know, and I am trying to be understanding about his wife feeling insecure---but this is his child, she knew he had a daughter when she first hooked up with him, and then later when she married him! How would she feel if he didn't want to see his son, and yet she wants him not to want to see his DD. Manda has seen his ex off and on, and is 'friends' with her on my space, so we get to see pics of the kids. She has 3. Will try to keep this understandable!!! She dated this kid all through school (former DIL is who I am talking about), shortly after graduation about the time my son met them, she ended up pregnant. Boyfriend got scared and took off. My son began dating her despite her pregnancy. He was there when her son was born, and on the way home from the hospital they stopped by. He tells us he loves her and to treat this baby like it is his. So we did, we fell in love with Mason, love him to this day---he is 7 1/2. So shortly thereafter they get married, and she ends up pregnant again. We find out this one is a girl, and everyone is thrilled. Until one day son gets off work early, comes home and catches old boyfriend in bed with his wife! So they divorce. Old boyfriend moves in and is present when granddaughter is born----we were all there, me included! So Daddy #2 was there to raise baby #1, and Daddy #1 was raising baby #2! Then they divorced too! She then had another baby that we have never seen---with and I am totally serious here---a very dark skinned Navajo, EMO, mortician! Tight pants, hair in the eyes, black clothing and nails and eyeliner etc. Well she never married him, and has since come out as a lesbian and is living with a woman. When she moved the 3rd or 4th time while our son was living in CO, he lost track of her, none of us saw her for a long time. Come to find out she was living with her parents in Marble Falls TX. He continued to send CS--and all his checks come back. Through the years all have come back eventually except a couple and they were never cashed so he has no idea where they went. Rick told him to do this so that when he finally caught up with her, he could be up to date and not in arrears. So he sent the checks---and while he could cover one at a time, he does not have the $$$ now to cover them all, and keep current as he was allowing us to believe he could. So he was hesitant about seeing her, knowing he is headed for financial responsibility---AS HE SHOULD BE!!!! Some days I look at him and wonder where in the hell his brains are, and how he ever became so chauvenistic! He was not raised by us to be that way! So....with any luck I might not be finished shopping, I might get to buy for my granddaughter!!! Now here is my dilemma! I want to buy for both her and Mason, I love him! What about the other child? I am not a mean person and hate leaving a child out like that, but I also am not made of money! So do I go less, and spread it out....or buy only for the DGD??? Sorry....it is such a mess of a story! I am afraid to be excited! Potter (the dog I now own) is settling in. He is afraid of Rick, but slowly getting better. Rick is trying so hard too! I think Jason must have been mean to him..... Well I am off to bed. See y'all tomorrow! Night night Kat

Hey guys~~~ Busy day here, got my laundry done, all my wrapping done, the peanuts finished roasting, most of them bagged (still some cooling), made breakfast, then dinner....took the dog for a walk, vaccumed up the mess I made dropping the box the peanuts came in---peanut skins everywhere and fyi---they cling to the vaccum! Lots of static electricity I guess! Feeling really blah..... Love your dishes Terry! Judy, it is not bragging, you know when you do a good job at something! We beat ourselves up when we screw up, we need to acknowledge when we do things well too, I think it is high time we are nicer to ourselves! Pamela, it sounds like my house, Rick has not touched his honey do list these days off. He is going to find himself cleaning my vaccum filters in the dark!!! Suzanne, I think Abby is a lucky little girl, it reminds me of Kinsey, all the adults around waiting to praise her efforts!!! I buy the gingerbread house kits at Walmart each year, and I build the basic house one evening, then the next morning I let the kids decorate---the windows may not be even, or even resemble windows, but they are so proud of them! This will be my first year building one with Connor if I can keep his attention long enough to do one! SomedayI will learn how to size my pics and will show you some of their work! I think Abby, Macy and Kinsey could have themselves a great time together.....until Robby starts chasing them!!! LOL Can you imagine them all together? Add in another boy with Jenn's Dylan!!! Chaos would ensue I am sure!!! Well I am off to put laundry away, maybe another short walk with the dog. Made a decision that I KNOW myself around all these goodies, I cannot avoid these days----so I am just going to make an effort to up the exercise until the goodie fest is over!!! Maybe then with the exercise and hopefully no steroids soon, and holidays over, I can drop this weight again.....I sure as hell hope so. I see a fill in my future!!! TTYL! Kat

I have a card, that was given to me at my first fill appointment. I use it at buffet style restaurants, and have had no issue with using it at all. In those cases, I don't eat anywhere near what I used to! And doggy bags are not an option there. In other restaurants where I can get a doggy bag, or a to go container---I never use it, and I take my leftovers home. Now if one of the places I wanted to go and use it would not allow it, I would go anyway. The company and the outing is more important to me now than the food!! LOL And I am sure there were times the buffet style places lost money on me pre band! I read on a similar thread awhile back about a bandster who was put out that they did not honor her card, and she said she filled no less than 20 plates heaping full and left them sit on the table. Those kind of actions will ruin it for everyone.....I hated reading that! What a waste! A couple of weeks ago, we met our family at Golden Corral for Breakfast. We do it once a month or so, meet there, eat, and then we can all go our separate ways. We get to see one another, no one has to cook or clean, and each family pays their own way. In our group was myself, my SIL, and a niece and we are ALL banded. And the cashier was a young man, no more than 22-23 years old, and terribly obese. He ask us tons of questions, and is actually interested in the surgery! Kat

Sherry is home and posting---the world just feels more "right" now!! Glad you are home and well---hugs!!! BBL~~ Kat

I think in many ways when the year mark passes, we get complacent. It is like we have a goal for ourselves for that year mark, and if we meet it, we relax some, and if we don't, then we are rightfully proud of what we DID accomplish, and relax. I saw that happening with myself! In fact several of us who were banded at the same time discussed it, and we thought maybe if we went looking for it, we could capture some newbie spirit, and also guide the way for new bandsters.....so we come here to bother you as mentors!!! There were a bunch of us in April 06, tho not as many as you 07's. Slowly but surely the 06 support thread dwindled, members quit posting, not just to our thread, but altogether. Then several of the remaining 06'ers began running.....and our thread sort of became a challenge thread, to see who could beat someones time etc. Well I cannot run. Not the marathon type running they did. Hell I bust my butt running across the yard in Gruene!! LOL Seriously tho, it was very cliquish---and I was not getting much out of it. Then someone suggested (bless Betty --Guysis) that we mentor the April 07 group. There were times I wanted to cry, you guys were dropping weight like flies, and I wasn't!!! LOL But you gave me back the impetus I needed, and the support I needed, and the friendship in the band I needed! And you grew to be so much more than band friends!! So 2.5 years out, I am and I do get tired of the eating regulations! And I am doing so many things wrong I don't even want to list them! I know exactly where you are coming from TracyK....I do, there is a part of me that is raring to go too. But with all that is going on right now---I do not want to just set myself up to fail. I am conciously trying to adjust what foods I find myself snacking on etc. I tried today at my Aunts funeral dinner, to keep to the Protein and veggies, and avoid the sweets---telling myself, if I am going to cheat and ingest all those calories, I am saving it for fudge!!! Sad---but I did not eat the Cookies and the cakes! And I have no fudge here, it is at my MIL's---she makes a totally different kind than my Mom and I love them both! But I did not make any yet, and keep it! LOL All this reminisching just to say THANKS!!! You girls have kept me going for the last year and a half! And made such an impact on my life--love you all!!!!! Manda is finishing moving into her apartment as we speak. Jason did not leave her the key to the storage unit, and he left town, so she cannot move everything, but she will be able to survive. Whether her dog does or not is another matter, he hiked his leg on my bed this morning--on the bedskirt I just bought! Talk about pissing me off!! I am going to do my best to get through this....any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. He did it less than 3 minutes after coming in from outside. The bedding, the carpet, everything is new, never had an animal around it prior to mark it or anything. Well, I am going to go get something accomplished -- has been a day where I got nothing done!!! Wish I had Jenn's new kitchen....mine needs cleaned, sounds like a reason for a new one to me!! LOL Talk to ya soon! Kat

Oh Suzanne, I no longer feel so alone in my hazy, kinda crazy buzz tonight!!!! I had a stressful afternoon, and my hives went freakin' crazy! So Rick and I went to dinner and he ordered a beer, with our mexican food, and suggested I do the same......so I did. I felt so mellow after it, I had another! Then one more for good measure!! LOL Feelin' pretty easy goin' right now. Broke the news to my DD that we are going to the inlaws for Christmas dinner. She absolutely hates going there! BUT.....it is fair, Rick should get to spend some time with his family too. And it is less work for me! And less expense! And she can just deal with it! No news from Jane???? Well girls, I am gonna take my tipsy butt to bed!!! Tomorrow is a crappy day. We have a funeral for the father of one of Rick's long time friends tomorrow at 10 then my Great Aunts funeral tomorrow at 1. What a day...... Everyone take care, I will check in at some point tomorrow. I hope I still fit in my decent clothes for the funeral!! C-ya tomorrow! Kat

I really don't have any issue with the way either of them looks, what amazes me is to look back at past presidents and first ladies, and to see how the office ages them! They go in looking one way and finish up looking waaaaaaay haggard and old and frumpy! Kat

Just checking in for news on Jane.....be ok Jane, we are worried about you! Weather here is clearing, it is cold. Manda is having to work today, they are doing the needy family deliveries since they were snowed out of doing so the other day. I have slippers to buy for my parents from my brother, to go with the rest of the things I got for them yesterday. Also have to take Mom in to exchange Manda's mattress topper. She bought it before Manda made the decision to leave, so she had a King size bed. Now she has a full (double) size------so it needs to be exchanged, and will sure be easier now than following Christmas. Kinsey is finishing up lunch, then we are going to vaccum and go on in to town and finish up our stuff. I do the main floor, and she uses the hand vac around the wood box! I have my own little slave!!! Went to chinese with DS, DIL, DGS, DD, and DGD last night---oh yeah and Rick! Then we come back here and the kids ran wild. OMG! Finally said something to my DIL about the potty training. He asks to go especially when he sees Kinsey go off in the bathroom! He had poopy pants, and she ask me if I had any diapers. I told her I had girls pull ups, but if she wasn't going to bother potty training him, she was going to have to start carrying the diaper bag again, that is was not OUR place to buy him diapers! She said my son is embarrassed to be carrying the diaper bag with him being so big. I just looked her in the eye, and did the one eye brow raised thing like....well???? does that tell you something???? Finally I said well then I guess HE needs to train him! She tells my MIL they don't want to because they like having him as their baby. Puhleeeze! Well my Mom is ready to go, so guess I will get it done. I have a throbbing headache, and feel like my face is fatter than it was over 100 pounds ago. I have hives on the back of my neck,and on my inner thighs. This is REALLY not what I want to be doing! BBL~~~ Kat

Brandy--do you have plans? Is he leaving? Are you? Do you have a place? The busy season will make it a bit easier to distract your kids from the tension. I sounds like you have 2 girls, I would make the holiday about them, and start new traditions with them....like a Christmas Eve Girls only tea luncheon or something, something you can continue with just them even after your life moves on. You CAN do this. It is not always going to be easy or pleasant, but if you keep your kids in mind, you can get through it. If you have not been doing so, document everything, watch your bank accounts, and insurance policies. Stay strong! Kat

Yay for Sherry!!! So glad she is alert and ok.....we can all relax and let her heal now....and she will likely leave us in the dust!!! Love ya girl! Kat

Oh Jane, hope all is well, and you are home soon! Love you!!! Has been a really long day----and I am off to bed. I had both grandkids today, OMG.....I really AM old! See ya tomorrow. Lotsa prayers for Jane! Kat

Since I am not working, I almost get insulted when Rick suddenly starts picking things up, or grabs the vaccuum, like I am not doing MY job to his standards. He insists that is not it. Makes me wonder----am I really IMPOSSIBLE to please?? Kat

First of all.....Sherry, you were in my mind when I went to bed, and again when I woke up----hope all is going wonderfully. Hugs and healing power being sent your way.(((((((Big careful squeeze)))))))) Betty--I hear ya sister!!! I preach the same thing! I never have been seriously tight except the first 3-4 days following my 2nd fill. Until I got sick, then I would get tight--and I would always wonder how people lived like that. As I sit now I have no fill. I had not felt the need for one too bad, until these meds, now I KNOW I need help, but at the same time, I know the meds are causing the incessant hunger, and I am afraid I would push the band limits, and would prefer having to re-lose the weight as to ruining the ability of having the band. I am much like you in the respect, that I recognize in myself, a need to wait til the holidays are behind me. Although, them combined with these steroids, I may be back to my start weight by then! I swear, I think about food non stop these days. It is a struggle to eat things that are at least semi healthy! I have never eliminated carbs completely, although I do (did) try to get them from veggies, Beans, Peanut Butter, that kind of thing. I avoided sugars and starchy carbs. Once I quit them, it was not hard to do without them. Sherry I am fully, totally on board for a daily check in with exercise. Now that I have this dog.....he needs walked, maybe once the snow eases I will get off my duff and do it! I can also use my DREAD mill, and my EllipticHELL machines!!! I feel kind of psyched up for a new calendar year, and a fresh start. Not sure if I have went into this ---- but my DD and her husband divorced 3 years ago. They remained civil all along, and did really well sharing their daughter, Kinsey that I speak of so much. His computer activity was a big issue in the divorce--he was involved with another woman on line, as well as into the war game thing. Well, a year and a half passed, and one thing led to another, they decided to try to reconcile. So they tried it again. My DD had just been diagnosed with her RA, and was in a bad flare, and was concerned about what would happen with Kinsey if her health failed completely. So for awhile things were good, then slowly slipped right back where they were. He was again yelling all night on the computer playing games. He began a weekend job at a ski resort--alone, would not allow them to accompany him. She felt like there was more going on. He has an excellent job, he works with my DH, and he makes upwards of $28.00 per hour. It is not a money issue. He would go days without seeing or speaking to them, with both of them working. He refused to go to Kinsey's Christmas programs, he had battles! Well Manda finally said enough, and rented herself an apartment. So until it is ready---and the snow quits enough for her to move the beds and such, she and Kinsey are staying with us. She had 2 dogs---and her apartment is no pets. But it is something she can afford on her own if he flakes on child support or something, with the economy the way it is, she wanted to be self sufficient. So my Mom and Dad took the chihuahua, and we have the pug. We figured this would be less traumatic on Kinsey, since she would still be able to have her dogs in a way. I mean I keep her daily, so she has Potter (the pug) here to play with. We are trying really hard to keep things easy on my granddaughter. Right now Jason--her dad, the ex, is being difficult, but that is to be expected, he is hurt. I have faith he will eventually come around again, and be a good dad. Til things settle my posting will be erratic. Now I share my computer with DD as well as DH!! Let us know how you are ASAP Sherry!!! And then we will work out the details for our GOAIG-again (getting our asses in gear-again) plans. Having some of you in the same complacent place I am, and also having some newbie excitement here, is going to help us all I think!!! Better get up and dressed, my Dad is coming over so I can cut his hair. Catch y'all later! Kat

Terry, sorry you are feeling blah! I do know where you are coming from. I do 90% of the housework around here, but only now that I am home all the time. When I had the day care, and was away from home, I got more help out of DH. AND I had someone come in and do basics once a week. Now I do it all, and it is done to a lesser degree!!! LOL I really missed Leona doing my house today when I was scrubbing the damn stove top-----talkabout nasty!!! This afternoon we went to see Gary---and he is looking like Gary again! He has color, and was talkative---such a relief! He is beginning a soft diet by mouth again. See how it goes. Today he swallowed one of the cameras---the way they eventually say they will do routine colonoscopies. As it works through his intestinal tract it will take over 40,000 pictures. He wears this monitor type thing while it is working through. So I can see if you are in the hospital it would be ok, but out and about---it would be seriously cumbersome! Then we drove Kinsey (she & Manda went with us to see Gary) through some Christmas lights, and she and I come home and dipped pretzels. I know they are easy to buy, but they are easy 'candy' for her to make, and she loves being in the kitchen! Manda got the first load moved to her new place today. She was not able to go to work, they closed to all but essential field personel due to the weather. It is due to snow another 6" tonight. But tomorrow she goes with the team to deliver to the needy families they adopted. She said she thinks she needs the reminders---life could be so much worse. Jane I am sorry you are hurting! I hate that! I am looking at biopsy soon I know and I am dreading it. Mine will be less invasive I am sure, they deaden my leg and drill away!! LOL, sounds trite, but true! I should be wrapping some gifts, but putting off making the mess! My neighbor was taken away in an ambulance a little while ago. He had a heart attack several years ago, but has seemed to do fine since. He actually walked out, on oxygen, and then they settled him into the back of the ambulance, and attached all the leads, and BP cuff. His wife followed the ambulance, which was not using emergency lights or siren. He is not a bad guy, he always speaks, and he talks heart issues with Rick a lot. She on the other hand is a bitch and a half! She treats everyone else like they are miles below her. She will not speak if she passes you in the store, or if we happen to go to our cars at the same time. They own a realty company, and a title company, and are part owners of the local Country Club Golf Course. They had a party one night, and when I come home, one of their guests had parked IN my driveway! I could not park at my own house! I come so close to just having it towed---but I called and when she finally lowered herself to come to the phone, she was MAD that I was insisting the car be moved. She didn't like me before and likes me less now! BUT, she treats all the neighbors that way. Why they do not move out to the green, I will never know! Luckily all my other neighbors are equally lowly people like myself and we get along fine!!! LOL As for the allergy tests, we have done many. I know several things I am allergic to. None being in bloom, or an issue (cats) at this point. When I dealt with these hives last time, when my Grandma was dying, they decided they were stress related and called it idiopathic uticaria.........unexplained hives. I had no problems for years, and voila` here we go again. Thinking maybe the debit card thing, and then the IRS thing, coming so close on the twisted intestine thing---I might have overloaded. Not to mention that we have 3 kids and grandkids and they would never be stressful or anything....oh yeah and demanding inlaws I had to deal with in Texas for a solid week.......yeah it could be stress I guess!!! LOL Well I am going to hit the shower. I cut Ricks hair, and feel all itchy. I am not sure how you do that Jane---I feel his pokey stubble hair all over my shirt! Talk to y'all tomorrow!! XXOX Kat

Pamela, brisket is what we had, and it is one of the easiest things in the world to cook----but, I know the ones we buy and cook are huge! Way more than you would want for just you and Susanne! Maybe some holiday, or when you are entertaining? Was wanting to go riding today, but we are still getting snow flurries, and my girl does not like wind in her nose, let alone snow, she gets VERY stubborn, and unhappy. So she can veg in the barn, and I will go shopping with my husband! I am shopping today for my brother---doing his shopping for Mom and Dad. His mental state he gets very flustered when confronted with crowds in the store, and trying to get sizes right, and make sure he can cover it all financially....he goes into overload. So, he ask for my help. Which is not a problem. Wow Pamela, I bet you are still floating through your day, the light is getting brighter at the end of that tunnel!!! Kinsey and Potter (the dog) are both extremely clingy, and vying for attention. But all in all, she is doing ok. I keep trying to be normal, make her follow the same rules, and such, and to still refer to her Daddy frequently enough to reassure her he is still in her life, but not so much as to make her want to see him right now, because he is refusing. He is trying to figure out a way to win his wife and daughter back he says. Manda's reply was "why just to ignore us away again?" Then I left, and took Kinsey and the dog out to play in the snow! We are going out to build a snowman here as soon as I get the kitchen cleaned....and here I sit at the computer! My pie hole report is not improving! B--an egg, a couple of slices of bacon, then another strip of bacon for a snack........I need to build an igloo not a snowman, and go live in it without food! I am dreading the snow play, because the cold really infuriates my hives. But all kids need to make snowmen and snow angels. Laura the nursery will be cute when ya get the crap outta there!!! LOL TracyK---you should send Macy to play in the snow with Kinsey, then I would be off the hook! And just in case you have the desire to spend ALL your money, I have some extra bills I will donate for you to pay!!! Ain't I sweet??!! Well, nothing is getting done, it is almost noon, I am still in jammies, Rick is in the shop, Kinsey is in a swimming suit-----time to get it together!!! BBL girlies! Kat

WTG Pamela!!! I am so proud of you, for continuing and pushing yourself through the hard times you have been through! I knew we would not be the only ones to see it!!! You GO GIRL!! Yay You!!!! Like I say I am just so damned proud of you---I know you are so happy, I just sit here grinning like I did something!!! LOL XOXOXO Kat

Below is an excerpt from our forum rules: When using this forum, you agree that we cannot be and are not responsible for the truth, completeness, objectivity or usefulness of any user-generated content, nor do we endorse any content, including, but not limited to, postings or replies to postings made by members who are moderators. We do nothing to verify member identities. You assume all risk in your use of information from other members. At all times, in all threads, in all interactions both here at LBT as well as anywhere else on line you need to keep these things in mind. Your face to face interaction with your own Doctor or nutritionist is your best bet at continued good health. With that said, sharing ideas, and OPINIONS here is always a great motivator and works as a wonderful support system. NO ONE ---- here, or in your local Dr.'s office has all the right answers for all the questions at all times. The non combative, polite exchange is totally appreciated in this thread though--shows lots of class!!! Kat

Luluc---my horses are the same way, whenever they tuck their heads to keep their noses out of the weather, you might as well just stay in the barn! Spoiled beasts!!! Good thing they are not actually expected to WORK in the weather!!! LOL They actually do better in the snow than the wind. Hoping for a ride tomorrow! Kat

Spudgirl, as your weight continues to drop, you (if you do like I did anyway!) will come to a point that you can look at the excess food and decide if you want it to go to WASTE...or eat it and let it go to WAIST. When I could see with my own eyes, the band was working, and my weight was becoming something I could control.....the waste vs. waist was an easy choice!!! And I soon learned to cook less, and not make it an issue!!! Good Luck! Kat

I too just had another NSV for the day----------for the first time in years, I shovelled the walks and driveway---without fear of falling over from a heart attack----seriously! Made me breath hard, but it was a lot of snow, and a lot of work, but it felt soooo good to do it in one stretch, not take any breaks. And not to feel like putting my head down when cars would drive by. In my heavy clothes and bulky coat, I always felt absolutley HUGE. Great exercise! So what did I do? Rewarded myself with a cookie.....DUH! Susan, that was a doubly hard lesson to learn, but I bet you were much more cautious about choosing friends as well as men after that. My first husband cheated with Lord knows how many women. He married again, one of the 'other women' she worked with him. He cheated through many years with her as well. Then a couple of years ago, he moved in with one of my oldest friends. I felt so betrayed! Not by him---by her! He is far enough in my past to leave a serious feeling of indifference. Our child is an adult, I have no connection to him anymore, his life is his. But she never told me. We talked several times a week, and she hid it, lied to me outright. I found out when I stopped by to drop some things off for her kids, she was a single Mom (so I thought!) and always struggled to make ends meet. So when I would see a sale on something that would work for her 2 youngest, I would get it for them. I took some boots by to her son, and guess what?! I ended the friendship, simply because if you cannot have openess and trust in a friendship....then there is NO friendship. She proved herself unworthy of my trust, when I found out she had been with him for almost a year! And the kicker was that it had caused friction between my DD and I. My ex called me about a car I had for sale, and tried to get me to let him buy it on payments. I refused. Child support -- or lack there of --might be a long distant memory---but it was still there! I told my DD I did not want her discussing our life with him. We had plans of using the money to add a patio in the back yard, and he knew that. He was saying things about me being able to buy supplies on an as needed basis if I let him make payments. My DD kept telling me she had not said anything. I actually told her something about how in the hell else would he know??? I found out how. And I all but called my DD a liar, because in reality my so called friend was. Sooooo not worth my time! Glad you found better too Susan! Kat

Hey girls, are we really sure we wanna do the pie hole report???? Mine sucks in a big way!!! LOL Maybe I'll come back to that later!!! The big news is my Secret Santa present went out, and should be delivered by weeks end she said. Now if YOU get my package, be advised it is NOT wrapped inside--when you open the box it will all be exposed. So the choice is yours, open---or stuff behind the tree so the silly box will not show!!! I hope it makes it South without trouble.....wait, maybe it is north of me....West without question. Oh No! It must be East, I think I turned around in the PO parking lot! Never was good at directions, but it is without a doubt one of those---or even a couple! LOL Got my drive and walks shoveled. Rick did them before he left, and I did them again. Now the temp is warm enough even though it is still snowing, that it melts off pretty well when it hits the shovelled areas. My Kinsey is having a bit of struggle with things. She was VERY concerned this morning about her Mommy not coming back. And has ask me several times when she is coming back. Manda has called and texted Jason and ask him to please respond, she just wants to know he is ok, and that Kinsey needs him to talk to her too, to let this be as easy as possible on her, but he has not responded. Rick said he has not been at work. He didn't go yesterday because he was sore from snowboarding all weekend, and then she had the talk with him last night, and he didn't go today. Manda drove as far as the state line (NM & CO), and got stopped at the border, she was required 4WD or chains to go over a small mountain between the border and work. She has neither, she has good tires, and front wheel drive---but that wasn't good enough. So she parked at the checkpoint, and one of the field hands in a company truck with 4WD picked her up and took her on up to work. She is in charge of buying for the needy family her group adopted---and they are shopping today. The family has a special needs child, he has a disease, I cannot pronounce, but he is 9 years old, and weighs 30 pounds, wears a 24 month old clothes. The older daughter ask for new glasses. They went and met with the family to arrange for her to see an eye Dr. amd in conversation found out their washer was out, so they bought the family a washer, and clothes and gifts for the kids. Jeans for the Dad--who works, but just cannot keep up with the expenses medically, and have enough left to buy gifts. Manda said it was so much fun to buy gifts without the cost concern. I mean they still tried to get as much for their money as possible, but when we do the Angel gifts, we always have to concern ourselves with the cost factor--she said this was just amazing, and the feeling she said she could not even describe to me......although I bet it is similar to the Mom feeling I have knowing she is enjoying the giving the way I always hoped she would. Does that make sense??? Before we left for the PO and grocery store, I let the dogs out. Kinsey was right out in the snow with them. That Pug began running circles around her out there, he had us both laughing so hard Kinsey ended up falling on her fanny in the snow! He LOVES the snow! This is his first experience with it--and he rolls in it, and scoops it up on his smushed in nose---and runs like a crazy thing in it. He literally smiles ear to ear---such a funny thing. The chihuahua on the other hand, is not a happy camper. Of course the snow is way too deep for him, he is under 3 pounds, he is sooooo tiny. So he goes to the edge of the porch, does his duty (or doody---as the case may be) and runs as fast as his little twig legs will carry him back again!!! LOL OK.....not that this is seeming to make me behave, it will explain my weight gain! B--peanut butter toast S-oatmeal cookie, then another, then choc. pretzel....then it was time for L-vegetable soup---with crackers and Diet DP S-celery & Peanut Butter, handful of fresh roasted peanuts---and these sweets are not calling my name, they are screaming and threatening me!! Tacos are on the menu for dinner.......lets hope I can semi behave til then. I need Water....I need help! Hives are some better this morning, I had one on my lip.....hate them! others behind my knees. The cold made them worse, but the cleared quickly---from shovelling I mean. Well, off to make more things I do not need to eat!!! Wish me luck. Stay warm everyone! Kat

PJTP my NSV of the day---I try to find one each day. My DD is going through a rough time, and has rented her own place, but it will not have utilities until Thrusday so til then she, and her daughter and 2 dogs are with us. Love the granddaughter being here, could do without her rather nuerotic dogs!! But anyway...the NSV! She has so much stuff packed she ask if she could look in my closet for a sweater to wear since it is snowing like crazy out. I said sure. Pretty soon, she walked out, decked in MY clothes, from Uggs to jeans, to sweater-----she ended up wearing the jeans and sweater. She said she did it to show me what I look like to the rest of the world. I am telling you, if I look anything at all like she did, I am totally flabbergasted, because that is not what I see in the mirror! She made my day! Makes my eyes tear up to know I did it! With my band, and a little help from my friends! Kat

While this is very nice of you to offer....the advertising of your site is not allowed per LBT rules. 8. Direct marketing or selling is forbidden on LBT. Members may use their signatures to indicate a commercial affiliation by including a single link to a web site of their choice, with no more than one line of explanation in addition. This signature text is not to exceed the default font size of forum posts (size=2). You can find the link to the rules at the top of the page under Forum Rules. Thanks for your cooperation, and your understanding that this post may be deleted by an administrator. Kat

First of all, my heart goes out to all of you going through this right now. My DD is going through it right along with you. While I am very happily married now--I DO know where you are at. I have been divorced......twice! I did not make the same mistake twice, I made totally different mistakes, but the biggie was not listening to those that loved me and tried to steer me in the right direction from the beginning! One of the big things I have learned, is that being single can be lonely at times, when the kids are with him, and you find yourself truly alone-------but it is a less lonely feeling, than the one you have sitting in the same room with your DH or SO----and feeling like there is a Grand Canyon between you! Being in a room with someone you love, or loved at one time, and knowing you should be connecting somehow and are not is a far lonlier feeling that actually being alone. Time passes, and while you might at times feel like a chump for letting him/her get their way all the time, if you keep the kids in mind, and conduct yourself in a way that you are not afraid to let your kids see, or to tell them about, then in the end you will win....as you will have their respect. Who cares about what the ex ends up thinking about you? The kids matter. My first D(in this case it is Damned Husband NOT Dear!!!)H, my DD's Dad, was a cheater. He is still a cheater all these years later. It was not me, it is him. By the time I got my fill of his actions, he had 2 kids with other women! I just feel extremely lucky to have my loving DD and no diseases! My second was not a cheater, he was an abuser! I cannot tell you how strongly or how many times my family and friends told me he was a loser----but I knew better, he was an abused child, and he needed love. Uh huh! He literally tried to kill me. After many serious beatings, he tried to kill me and is finishing an attempted murder prison sentence. I took a serious time out then! I spoke with a Victim Impact Panel, trying to get our state to get better laws for Domestic Abuse. Through that I spoke with many people, from psychiatrists, to family therapists, to court advocates....lots of people with similar stories and suggestions on how to learn to accept my mistakes and move on. I did. I had days I laid on the couch and cried over injustices. I had days spent in the hospital recovering from #2. And I had girlfriends who are saints for listening day in and day out to my whining, and crying, and hating, and plots for revenge, and for not calling me on never following through with all my tough love plans! As each day goes by.....and they will, one minute at a time, and all you have to do is get through the next one....and the one after that! It does get better. BBK, I am really glad you opened the thread to get some support, it is something you really need, and deserve! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers---all of you---right along with my daughter, as she too goes through this. I bet though if you look around you, you will see strong successful women, and be surprised how many of them have a divorce behind them. It is VERY sad, and mourning the death of a marriage should be done! Blaming yourself for every aspect leading to it, should not. Hang in there----I'll be here pulling for you! Kat