Kat817

Many years ago, my brother was almost killed in a car accident, it left him with brain damage. He is now 45 years old, and has the reactionary level of about a 10 -13 year old. He is permanently a pre teen/young teenage boy......mouthy, infantile one minute, and grown up the next. In other words, he knows everything, all the time, he argues pretty much non stop, and everything is either totally lame or really cool. He does odd jobs, heavy physical labor type of cleaning, and yard work to support himself. Most adult men cannot be around him for very long, because he is annoying as hell. He disagrees, and questions EVERYTHING! My DH works really hard at being his friend, because he cannot make and keep friends, his mental attitude is not one people want to be around. Men his age, work all day, have bosses, and families, wives, and kids to argue with they do not choose to associate with his personality. It sounds harsh, but it is true. I love him, he is my brother, and there are times, I have to leave, I have had enough, I cannot send him to his room like I did my own kids! However..... He gets along wonderfully with like minded, similar aged mentally, kids--------he laughs and jokes and pokes fun at all kinds of things with kids. He is not however without ALL understanding, and he does realize it is inappropriate for a man his age to hang out with kids. Not only is it inappropriate, it is DANGEROUS! One accusation, and he could be locked up for life, because he has not got millions! My point is, if MJ had the ability to reason enough to do the good deeds he has done, and had the knowledge necessary to know to hide his kids from cameras, he should be able to understand the same lesson my brother lives with every day. Grown men do not hang out with, and definitely do not sleep with young children like that. If he felt they needed love, then they needed loved in broad daylight, not hidden behind closed doors of a bedroom. It makes sense to me that if you feel a child needs attention, then doing so in broad daylight in public, sends a second message to that child that they are loved without it being hidden. To only lavish it on a kid in a hidden manner tells that kid they need to be hid. Wrong. And $20 million bucks is a lotta money to keep your kid from any more traumatization of testifying. He was not normal. He could reason tho, and CHOSE not to, saw himself above reproach because he says he would never hurt a child. You can say almost anything if you have enough $$$$.

Large metal boxes (for lack of better descriptive abilities!) with slatted sides, that hold pads usually made from excelsior (shredded curly wood---usually aspen) that water is pumped up and dripped down over------and they surround a large squirrel cage type of fan---as it spins it pulls the cooled air from the water soaked pads and blows it into the house. Work great when it is dry.....not so great when the air is wet too......

I liked some of his early music as a single performer---post Jackson 5. When his last (I think) video come out, my DD told me to watch it, and it was something about his childhood. To us it seemed pretty evident something had happened in HIS childhood as well. Extremely wierd and sad video, wish I could remember the name, and I might be able to link it-------but anyway, it has been proven that molested people have a higher tendency to molest. Did it happen with him? Who knows? I DO know he had enough money and resources to get help-----it was not as though he was without options. He seemed to me pretty normal for a music star up until he got burned doing that Pepsi commercial, so I kind of believe he got seriously addicted to pain meds or something then, and it allowed the wierdness to flow unchecked. Because like him or not, you must admit he turned into one very truly Wacked out person. The Wacko Jacko fit much better than King of Pop. Had he kept himself in another manner, he may have kept the title KOP--------but not when he wigged out .....IMHO. What surprised me is how the news people, went from exposing his every gaffe----and referring to him as Wacko Jacko etc, to now they act like they loved him forever, and they were all personal friends. It happens often in death, that they iconize and idolize someone after they die. Personally I would love to pull some footage of some of these anchors blasting him and criticizing him.....and put them, side by side with their patronizing loving reviews now.....ridiculous!

The news is consumed with Jacksons death---and it is such idiocy! For years they talked with nothing but scorn (and I am not saying it was not deserved) about him, only mentioning his craziness etc. Now the anchors are all acting like he was their best friend, and they supported him always etc. He was such a good guy kind of talk...... Gimme a break!!! At least maybe this give Farrah's family some privacy, and did not make such a circus of her death. Otherwise there would be reporters camped outside the prison where her son is, trying to get in! I could not believe she was only on Charlies Angels one season! Wow! Rainy looking day here----but it won't last. Just the unusual humidity will. We normally have temps in the high 90's to low 100's, but it is usually dry heat, with no humidity in sight. We don't run on refrigerated air, we use swamp coolers, and when the humidity hits, they are worthless. So it is gonna be a miserable day! My hair doubles in size!! LOL Back before my cancer, my hair was straight. I knew how to deal with it---it was straight if it was sunny, straight if it was raining....it was just straight. Then when it fell out and come back--it is all kinds! Some straight, some wavy, and some REALLY curly! And if I walk past the bathroom when Rick is in the shower, and get a whiff of steam....POOF! Well this weather is acting the same way!!! When we go to our place in TX---I french braid it, for simplicity!! But that is for puttering around the ranch, not work, I cannot do my own neat enough for work. So I put it in a twist, and I have like 2 hairs that are pulling and making me crazy!! Grrrrr Guess I will go make some oatmeal, it will take me through the day. I work until 2---then I am done for a couple of days. We have tons of family coming in---so guess I will stay busy. Take care!

I usually get up, listen to the news or read the paper and leave for work, but the only thing on is Michael Jackson tributes. Not needing to hear all that over and over and over. I liked some of his early single music---but he just got way to freakin' wierd for me! My personal opinion is that when he got burned making that Pepsi commercial, he became addicted to pain meds and spiralled out of control from there. But sleeping with kids, and dangling babies over balconies? And they want to compare him to Elvis...nah! By tonight, my in laws will have all their kids home (well I mean we WILL sleep at OUR house not theirs, but you get the idea!!) as well as the local grandkids and great grandkids, but the family from Denver is coming with a couple of grandkids and6 great grandkids. Kinsey will have a blast, there will be girl cousins!! LOL Sadly I am afraid much of the family is coming because they fear my SIL not making it through this blood clot ordeal. She sure looks rough---so scary. Hope all is wonderful in Alabama. Miss you all! How did Carson do on his vacation???

Been trying to get my housework done, we have family due in for the weekend. Rick's sister is bringing her 4 grandsons down from Denver tomorrow, and then his brother and his family with his son and 2 granddaughters will be here too---so, lots of family, and I do not want to be stuck at home doing the things I need to do to be ready for next week working again! Hope the Alabama crew is having a blast!!! I know they are! And in case I forget.....Jane TY----you are such a sweetie! Love you!!!

Thanks for all the well wishes on our losses, y'all are the best! One was expected, when you make it to 96, and have heart issues, it is not a big surprise. She was ready, so we accepted that. The second was not expected, and was heart breaking. This little girl, was a part of our family, was being raised by my niece. She was both physically and mentally handicapped, and remained at about an 8 year old level in maturity. She was loving and sweet, and special in every sense of the word. She fought asthma her entire life. She was born being told she would never walk, or eat on her own, through many surgeries, she did both VERY well!!! She was very active in Special Olympics, and my niece coached her in many sports there. She got pnuemonia a couple of weeks ago, and her lungs were too weak to fight it. They opted last week to turn off the ventilator. So incredibly sad. We were at the Grand Canyon when we got the news, and we headed home early. Ironically the last time we saw one another was at her Grannies funeral, and she was upset, so the last words I said to her, were that it would all get better and remember we loved her. Now they are together. She was a Navajo Indian, so the services involved her natural family and their cultures as well as our family and the customary funerals of our church. Some serious differences! They have some odd beliefs, and customs, but all were attempted to be followed. They had live chickens at the service! Her parents were dead, and she had been being raised by grandparents who did not speak English, and are both well into their 90's. So she lived with my niece most of the time. We will miss her forever. And I do appreciate your kindness. Ed McMahon, Farrah, and MJ----all from my childhood, and all gone now--does that mean I am getting old? No! Wait!! Don't answer that!!!!!

I have been in and out quickly for a couple of weeks, we have dealt with a couple of deaths, and my DH and I escaped town for a long weekend and went to the Grand Canyon. So I have not been reading in the mod forum or anywhere for that matter. I got the same email, I knew nothing about it before now either! I have no idea of the reason or purpose behind it. I have no plans to change my posting habits. And do find it a bit disconcerting that anyone is watching it closer than I am myself!! Today is my late day to work. The office is closed, and I just check my labs, and deal with my own things. Got the laundry done last night, finished it up this morning, then managed to get the house cleaned today, so I can do the family from out of town thing this weekend, and relax a bit I hope! Love the attitude Ebony!!!

If she knows----try to use it to your advantage, and say things without having to "say" them......and while you are at it....lay it on thick Baby!!!

Glad you birthday girls seem to have had nice days! Suzanne I have been meaning to ask you if you too are shedding or what??? This KAT has stopped shedding for now, but holy cow, I have lost so much hair I feel light headed!!! Long day. Wierdest funeral I have EVER attended. The Navajo have such cultural differences, it was just bizarre. When they ask if anyone wanted to speak, my nephew stood up, as did one of Marvin's Special Olympics friends, and so did her birth brother. He went first and he spoke FOREVER.....and I have no idea what he said, he did it all in Navajo, for over a half an hour he mumbled on in Navajo. There were lots of challenged people there, and they were really getting antsy. Then the little guy she did her olympics stuff with read what he wrote, and it was such a sweet, childish from the heart telling her goodbye and thanking her for always making sure he was ok when he fell....it was touching! My nephew tried to really draw all components together, the birth family, ours, her job (she worked in the kitchen at a Del Taco) and her Special Olympics. But they opted to keep things separate. They would not join in the dinner the SO provided. The Dr. that my DD used to work for that Marvin loved so much apparently paid for the funeral we were told---how amazing is that? Anyway at the cemetary, they stay and watch the entire process, of burial, and the pall barers (sp?) do the shoveling, and they cannot leave until the ground is returned to normal. Even the jack hammer like tamping machine---pounding the earth down----was horrible. OH YEAH---several of the kids brought live chickens to the service! Something about life going on. Wierd! My DD had a rough time with it. Went on to work after that, just as an escape more than anything. I had a headache, and to be 100% honest, the thought of 60 Special Olympics kids, enclosed in a gymnasium, the temps being high 90's outside, and all the chaos.....I went to work. My SIL looked like she died 2 days ago. Poor thing is seriously ill, and I am not sure anyone is taking it as seriously as they should. Her blood clot is even bigger--it now runs in the arm from the elbow, up behind her collar bone and into her neck, her neck is swollen. She goes to the hosp. twice a day for lovenox shots, and takes coumadin daily, but the clot is worsening, not resolving. And they are not doing anything else. Scares me! The clot is following the path the PIC line was in----which leads to the heart....hello! Do SOMETHING!!! She used to do the drama thing to get attention, now she is almost too weak to even bother. She looks about 75 years old. She used to look way younger than her DH--not any more. And it isn't the weight loss, she lost weight, and was saggy (like most of us!!!) but this is sunken eyes, and yellow hair as opposed to her old white shiny hair. And grayish white waxy skin. Seriously scares me! Y'all have lots of fun, and have a few drinks for me, I'll miss you all like crazy!!! Kiss baby Carson for me. None of you forget your shirts from Suzanne, she wants your pic in them!!! XOXOXO

There is an old saying that the reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. Sucks, but if allowed to go unchecked as in your case Glou, it could have easily been turned into a them against you. I think you caught it at a PERFECT time. Plus your DD does not see you expecting her to act or eat any differently than you do yourself. She has fun with you at the gym, and sees you working on yourself, while seeing your Mom do none of this. I am 100% behind you in your DD being your maid of honor---no one else could do it as well. As for who marries you----who cares more about you, and your future happiness, a minister you met once or twice or your best friend??? My best friends son just got married, and the brides grandfather had himself ordained so he could do the honor. He is VERY active in the church, teaches Sunday school, and is the go to guy when the minister is gone--------but he had to go on line to get documentation to do it legally. It was a wonderful, moving, service they had. To be able to reference the couple in a different light than just them standing there, makes it so special. I think how you want it sounds wonderful. This one wedding we attended of my husbands cousins, when we got there, they herded us all around to the side of the house. It was done at an old plantation home in central TX. The groom and his attendants were getting ready at another home, so when they drove up and Marcus got out of the car to walk to the front of the service area, NO ONE was there! Then the soloist, began singing, and everyone---all the guests filed in, and stood, and the bridesmaids and all were at the end, followed by the bride being brought in by her entire family. We were instructed at the side of the house to reply to the question of "who gives this woman in marriage?"----"We do, her family and friends and we welcome you Marcus". I would have LOVED to be in the front of the group and seen his face relax when people were really there!!! Point being, it is YOUR wedding, and if you want to get married in zebra stripe hot pants, or by your friend----do what makes you happy. Beth, everytime your Mom says something negative, find yourself a catch phrase like " I guess I shouldn't be surprised YOU would feel that way" and when she questions you about it, avoid answering!! Make a game out of it. That's what I do with my MIL!!! A well placed chuckle, just make them feel like you are placating them like a misbehaving child, and it gets their goat pretty well!! We know you can and will do any damn thing you want!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUZANNE AND JUDY!!!! :thumbup::thumbup: Hope you have a wonderful day, followed by wonderful years. Enjoy your special day!

Tracy, I often fluctuate as much as 4 pounds depending on what I ate the day before. Any salty stuff and hello pounds!!! They go away as soon as I flush my body with fluids, but it is still such a downer to see it on the scale. We come home yesterday, and received our court summons, we have to answer within 20 days. So that means $$$ flying out the window in the next 20 days. Just telling me I made the right decision to stay here, no matter how much it sucks. Wish I was rich! Wish all of you were too!! I mean heck if I am gonna be wishing I might as well make it worthwhile!! I do know in the many ways that count I am rich beyond belief, but it sure isn't helping pay things---like attorneys! grrrrrrr still rather pay him than her! Kinda dreary here this morning. Supposed to rain later today. Matches my mood perfectly. Michelle, I hope they find your problem soon. Do you take any sort of antacid, or sleep on an incline? I have to do both. Not due to my band, but due to GERD, which I had before, then they repaired the haital hernia during my banding, but the area is pretty weak, and it has herniated again, and the reflux is back. Even when I was 100% unfilled, it was an issue. I cannot eat late, try to flush my pouch before bed, take OTC antacids and sleep on an incline. Have for years. Rickhas issues with GERD as well, and since his esophageal tear, the reflux is dangerous to him, so we raised the head of our bed, and added pillows--it is normal now. I have an air up wedge pillow I take when I go anywhere, where the bed is not adjusted. Got a request from my niece for help with expenses of the funeral. So need to get some $$$ to her. And I have things to cook for that meal, and my SIL's anniversary party this weekend, gotta cook for that....and I really do not want to do a damn thing! LOL But for now, I better go to work. The fun times never end here folks!!! See ya tonight! Oh yeah-----forgot which muscles I use for wood hauling....they are reminding me this morning! I worked out!

I am exhausted!!! We hauled the truck and trailer, and my Dads truck full of wood, and unloaded our big truck and the 18 foot trailer when we got home, and the temp is in the high 90's! But it is only open M-F and this is the only weekday Rick and I are off together, so it was now or who knows when. PLUS the wood is cheaper in the summer months, although it has gone up in a MAJOR way. We used to get a truck load for $5.00 and now it is $30.00! But still cheaper than having it delivered, and come winter we will be glad we did it. The ONLY other positive thing I can think of about it, is it was amazing exercise----I hurt everywhere! My tan is coming along nicely from it tho! Rick's brother from Denver is in town---he stops through on his route, he travels for work. So they went to see his sister here, she had the huge blood clot caused by the PIC line, it run from her elbow to her collar bone. Today her neck swelled and she has another one in the neck, even though she is getting the lovenox shots, and taking coumadin orally. Scary stuff! So the boys went to see her. Then we were all supposed to go to dinner. Well it is going on 8---and now the sister thinks we all need to eat in her little nasty town, and there is noplace to eat there! And it keeps getting later and later. They know I do not eat late, so I am taking it personally! I am seriously wanting to send Rick and stay home, but he would not go either, and he really enjoys time with his brother. So gonna suck this one up and deal with it. My kitchen is still a mess-----guess I should use this time constructively and clean some, so will talk at y'all later!!!

Not saying that it happen to them, but I was shocked to see our credit score had dropped dramatically. And we are not doing anything really to make that happen! We have slowed our spending, yes. DH's hours were cut, we have had a wage cut, and even though I have gone to work, it barely evens out, so we have cut the frivolous stuff, and have actively begun stashing for the possible oncoming lay off. I paid off my car. No more monthly positive payments on my credit report. We had 3 credit cards. MC, Visa and a work related American Express of my DH's. We carried a small balance on the MC, but recently paid it off, the Visa, we used but paid off each month. Well they (Visa)sent us a letter stating that we fell into a category that they were reinstating the yearly charge for simply having the card. So I called, and they would NOT waive the fee, so we cancelled the card, and WHAM it affected my credit rating!!! We replaced it with another card from our local bank. We have always kept 2 major credit cards, one we carry to have with us for use, the other remains at home, where if something happens and we lose our usual, we have a back up plan, if finances are involved. We once lost a card (was a switch pulled at a restaurant in CA) and when we cancelled it due to that, we were in a cash crunch, while on vacation! So we have kept back up ever since. So add to the closed account, paid off car, a new inquiry into our credit, and it lowered it again. Even though they issued the new card, and it come with a higher credit limit than we requested, it ALL worked against us! We pay our bills on time, and I would not have hesitated to apply for any type of credit---and didn't---when I got the new card. But I ask for a copy of what they got and was SHOCKED! We went from excellent credit-----comsidered gold, to silver I would say, and we did not default a single thing, we still pay everything on time, and are not overextended. Our home is paid for. Now so are our vehicles, we own several pieces of land, and have little debt. And we are punished for it with lowered numbers!!! They told my DD to get a pre approval for her home loan, and then to wait at least 3 months, or if anyone checked it again it would lower her rating. Where is the common sense in that???? Sorry your sale fell through. I really would have pre approved, but I would not have thought I would have to! Will keep my fingers crossed for----------- Your home to sell Ebony's job to come through Beths job to come through--and that she and CC stay break free while they rollerblade!!! G4E's health to return, and pain to go away Lu not to be subjected to any more surprises Tap and I not to see any snakes!! What did I forget??????

Good morning! Slept great, even though I was still stuffed!! Terry, several years ago, when my DD was nursing at a Dr.'s office, my neice was doing the billing for the same office, and they had this patient they all -- the entire staff--fell in love with. She was mentally and physically handicapped, and sweet and loving as the day is long. Her parents are not in the picture she was being "raised" by her grandparents. Her name is Marilyn, but she hates it! She wants to be a boy---and be Marvin. It is not a sexual orientation issue, she has never matured to the point of that swaying her, she likes boys toys better! She loves transformers and Power Rangers! She died Friday at the age of 43, but never really aged past a maximum of 8-10. She was VERY involved with Special Olympics. Eventually my niece became her caretaker, she took her all over the country to compete with SO, and she coached many of her teams. She would spend the night with my DD, and spend hours playing hide and seek with Kinsey. She was small in height, but kinda husky, never making 5 foot though. And she would launch herself on you like she was 2 and hug and love you. She loved me, she called me Aunt Kathy, but she loved me most because I was Manda's Mom!!! She loved my DD and my niece--who she referred to as Mom-----dearly. They WERE her family. So if you figure she really was over 40----her grandparents raising her were well into their 90's! So the only livlihood type of life she had was with our family. She was at all functions, she was included in all pictures, she was on the Christmas, and birthday lists, she was family. She was sweet, and innocent, and we will all miss her forever. Due to her physical differences her lungs were compromised, and she suffered from serious asthma. So when she got pnuemonia it was always difficult to come back from, and this time, her poor little body was too tired to fight anymore. Services for her will be Wed. it will be difficult. Thanks for all the love I feel from you Violets!!! I also have wonderful news. My cousins twins arrived this morning, healthy!!! The little boy, Blake, was 6 pounds and 3 ounces. The little girl, Macy, was 5 pounds and 13 ounces! Mom was still in surgery, they are tying her tubes and fixing a rupture (hernia), so Dad took time to call the Grandma who called us! He said she is awake and responding, they are doing it all with just the epidural type anesthetic, so she is ok, and the babies are fine! Which is wonderful---with her age, the odds were higher for problems, not to mention her having MS! So......life goes on. Tears of sadness, tears of happiness, and they comingle...... Rick and I are off to get a load of wood today to begin restocking our winter store!!! We are taking a picnic lunch and making a day of it. So I better get moving. I am supposed to be getting dressed while he went after the pick up!!! LOL here I sit in my robe still!!! So excited for all of you going to Alabama!! Jealous, as well---but excited for you---you will have such a good time! They are holding my SIL's anniversary party Sat. since they cancelled before. She is not doing well at all. She has serious health issues from not eating for so long, her body is rejecting itself in auto immune ways----all her lymph glands are HUGE! Her Dr. does not seem worried, I am afraid it is going to kill her! But change Dr.'s??? No way. My MIL is beside herself. I shrugged it off for awhile, but I am telling you she looks ready to drop dead. Scary stuff!!! Makes me really be HEALTH concious of how I am trying to get this weight off. I MADE MY -5!!!!!! In a healthy manner, I did not starve----ever! Gotta go, I hear the truck!!!!!

Emotional night. Cannot even describe the oddities of the cultural differences. They upset me, I know they have their beliefs, but some of them seriously angered me, one of her uncles saying in broken english, that she died because she embarrassed the tribe. I wanted to choke him, but he was an old, stupid man. They wanted me to say my goodbyes while the family was there watching me and instructing me in certain things to say, and I could not touch her. Was a sucky thing to be honest. I brought some pics of Marvin we had taken through the years, and her Navajo family would not look at them, or allow the board of photos that my niece prepared be present, because looking at her in that manner might keep her from being allowed to move on, and trap her spirit here on earth. I know they have their beliefs, but it was just sad. The rest of the day was great. All the kids were here, and Manda's friend was here with his twins Jacob and Isaiah. The ones Kinsey always referred to as the 2 boys with one face. The 2 of them and Connor played hard. Kinsey spent most of the day with her Dad, only getting here after most had left. And she was so sunburned, Manda was furious. Her little face is beet red. Food was good, company was good, lots of laughing, and playing, and talking. It was a nice get together. Then my MIL tells me, it just breaks her heart to see me be able to eat like I do and her DD cannot. I was unsure how to take it, gave her the benefit of the doubt that she just wishes my SIL could eat as well. She says that she is still not eating. Which is not surprising, there has been no attention being paid to her, first her MIL passed away and now Marvin---so no one is focusing on her, and that upsets her. Abbey and the son out law, were here, with Corvin, and he is such a sweetie, he is laughing all the time. He thinks I am hilarious, he would start in with the belly laughs, and have us all laughing with him! Such a cutie! He is not as big as y'alls boys!! He is 5 months old, and is almost 14 pounds, and is 25 inches tall. He is in 6 month sizes, has 2 teeth. He still is nursed mostly, although he is being introduced to Cereal now, he sorta likes it, but gets frustrated and is ready to nurse soon after trying to eat!! He is like a Water faucet with his drooling! He soaks everything! More teeth on the way I guess! We bought him this stuffed toy at the Grand Canyon---you know we HAD to buy gifts for the babies!! Anyway it squeaks, and everytime we would squeak it he would squeal loudly and just laugh like crazy. It was hilarious. Realized after they left we forgot to give Connor and Kinsey theirs....duh. I am ready for bed, but I ate waaaay too many ribs today, and it is just slow digesting! I did ok, with avoiding the side things, the chips etc, kept to the Protein, because they were SOOOO good! Now I am miserable tho, and ready to go to bed. Will see y'all tomorrow. Was going to be off, because we were not going to be back, so going to go ahead and take the day anyway----YAY!!!

Well we have things underway for our cook out, most of the prep work is done, and Rick has cleaned the patio and yard, and grill----even tho it is Fathers Day, he too takes pride in it all being nice for everyone to gather. Tonight I have to do something very foreign to me. In the Navajo culture, the spirit remains in the body for 5 days. They used to build a raised alter, and leave the body in the open closer than normal to the heavens and let the body remain there for 5 days while the soul rested, awaiting entry into heaven. Not exact, but I cannot remember which leader is supposed to transport......they told us---they being Marvins grandparents. So now they have the waiting time, and during that time, we are supposed to say our goodbyes etc. to her. So they literally booked me a time to be at the mortuary with Marvin to say goodbye. It is tonight. I have sat in mortuaries and cried, and even said goodbye, but this is the first that is ritualistic. Has me a little unsure, and I am afraid tongue tied. The last time Marvin and I talked back and forth was at my BIL's moms funeral a week and a half ago, and she was sad, and getting sick then, and the last thing I said to her was "It'll get better baby, don't forget we love you" as Rick and I hugged the kids as we were leaving. She was a bit shy at first but overall very outgoing, so I know she is busy winning everyone over in heaven. Manda and I had this talk last night. She said she feels stupid for even saying or asking, but that she has always been comforted by knowing your soul is at peace in heaven, and all your ills and ailments were gone. She was concerned that Marvin would not be Marvin, if she was releived of her retardation. I really hate that word---we also discussed that! But y'all know what I mean, it is not derogatory, just descriptive. In the end we decided God does not make mistakes, so Marvin is just how he intended her, and we will see her again as we know and love her. Sad conversation with my kids, but I am comforted knowing where they are in their beliefs. Even though we have my SIL telling us repeatedly how immature and inaccurate our beliefs and feelings of life/death/heaven etc. are. It is fine by me, I prefer immaturity then!!! I have the Beans a bakin', and the corn bread salad a chillin' and ribs are ready for the grill. The rest the kids are doing! Hope you all have a good day. Pamela my heart is with you today, I know it is a hard one for you. For all of you that no longer have Dads around to Celebrate with---(((hugs))) wish I could make today easier for you. See you all tonight after my "time"

I am home. We cut our trip a little short, we got bad news while there. Our little "Marvin", passed away yesterday. The news was just heartbreaking. Such a sweet, loving and innocent soul. I consider myself extremely lucky to have had her in my life. Her actual name is Marilyn ---- but I ask that you remember her as Marvin in your prayers. She is pain free, and regaling the angels with her stories now---but there are lots and lots of tears being shed for her here. My niece is beside herself, she is blaming herself for Marvin being alone when she went to OK to bury her Granny. Poor thing, she had no idea of course. They changed antibiotics multiple times, but her lungs were pretty scarred from years of asthma, and the pnuemonia just would not respond to treatment. I was sitting there at camp crying last night and leaned over against Rick, and when I looked down --- there on the ground lay a penny, mud encrusted....but still a "penny from heaven" I have no doubt. I am sorry you have been so sick Heather. Hope it is all much better for you and the wee one now. They are delivering my cousins twins on Monday. They said the boy is now close to 6 pounds, and the girl about five and a half. So in order to keep her from spontaneously going into labor they will take them by c section Monday. The boy is breach in the birth canal area, if she begins to dilate seriously, he would be in jeapardy. So Blake and Macy (!) will be here in just hours now!!! You girls have a nice Fathers Day----we are cooking out for the dads----son is doing the cooking so Rick gets a break too! I on the other hand am in charge of most of the sides! Normal tho----isn't it??? XOXOXOX

Just waiting now for the tire on the bike to get finished, trailer is loaded, we are ready to roll!! My grandson is like your boys. He was a roly poly----had dimples where his knuckles were supposed (?--who says?) to be. His thigh rolls had rolls!!! Our son is 6 foot, and his wife is 5'5" or so, and Connor is not real tall now, but he is SOLID-he is built like a brick! He is a slow talker, he is 3 now, and talks, and talks pretty plainly---but he still just hits the highlight words, and expects you to fill in the sentence! Kinsey on the other hand was mini for years. Still her little skorts we bought the other day---little denim and cotton mini skirts with shorts under them, are a size 24 months---and an 18 month would have fit! And she is 4 and a half years old. She is just very petite in build, she is tall though. She is 39" tall and barely made 30 pounds. Where as Connor is only about 33" inches tall and 40 pounds!!! We bought a spinning teeter totter thing for them to play on in the backyard a few months ago---in early spring, thinking, they were always going to be fairly close in size so they could play, and they love it, but Connor can manipulate it, he can keep her airborn at any time he wants----which is frequently!! I fully expected to hear lots of whining when he first started doing it, then I realized it was Kinsey....she says to hell with it, and jumps! Thankfully it is not far, as we know fully well-------she BREAKS!! Her hands where he has dimples have itsy bitsy sharp little knuckles. He has big brown eyes, she has big blue eyes, and there is not a common drop of blood between them in reality--but everywhere we go, people ask if they are twins, and then say how much they look alike! Cracks me up! Just like the people Manda works with say she is just like her Dad, they would have known they were related.....and they only are because we are married! We are kinda concerned about our trip, this is one of the free weekends to National Parks! Yikes it could be crowded! But I reserved a camp spot and the guy told me it was cancelled earlier in the day and is an excellent spot, one of the first reserved usually. So at least we have that taken care of. We are staying in Tusayan---and decided to just kick back and do the arches another trip----too much riding time not enough relaxing time. We are going to do a 4 mile evening hike. Last night it sounded fun, today it sounds like work!!! Everyone take care----not taking the lap top, not thinking there will be any currant (current!!) bushes out there in the desert!! Will come home in a better frame of mind.....power of positive thinking...... hugs My neck is seriously hurting this morning. I got a crick (sp?) in it while french braiding my hair. My shoulders were sore from CPR class! But I am thinking maybe the muscles in my shoulders and neck were worked out too, and then arms in the air braiding-and my arms are fat and heavy----now my neck is jacked! LOL

Busy trying to get things together, Rick and I are heading to the Grand Canyon tomorrow. He is on vacation, and I had originally ask for next weekend off to go see y'all and since that isn't happening, I am taking this weekend off, and going to the big hole in the ground with my hubby, and getting the hell away from it all!! We are having a new rear tire put on the bike first----so will leave tomorrow afternoon, ride to either Monument Valley or to Lake Powell, depending on our choice of routes----and then spend the night, and go in on Friday, spend Friday and Saturday checking things out, probably leave and go to Arches National Park on Saturday, and then head home. We are going to do Fathers Day cook out on Monday, as we are both off, and Dads are both retired----and are ok with it. I'll be in tomorrow before we head out. Lunasa, when I am properly filled it really does help with my hunger issues, but I understand not everyone is that way. It is a SOLID 3 day BATTLE with me. I do not allow myself any sweets at all. During that time, I allow myself anything else I want----then once I get the sweets out, slowly the cravings ease, and I can go back to a healther diet. I was unfilled for a year with no issues, then steroids popped almost 40 pounds with no problem!! I am working to get it off. I am down 3.5 of our -5 pound challenge for the month. So I am going the right way again, just a much slower trip this time around. Talk to y'all in awhile! XOXOXOX

Setagirl, I found myself in similar eating patterns when I began my fill again after a year being unfilled. I had massive amounts of stress in my life, (my DD was incorrectly diagnosed with a fatal disease among other things---and we went for awhile believing we were going to lose her....)was was put on steroids to deal with the hives from that--and ended up on the quick gain diet, eating sweets because they went sooooo easy comparitively. In the end, I needed an unfill, I was too tight. If I cannot eat hard Protein, my Dr. considers me too tight. Once I was unfilled to where I could eat meat again, and vegetables, then I MADE myself go cold turkey on sweets----after just a few days, it was MUCH easier. During the time I was not allowing the sweets, I said screw the diet, and ate anything else I wanted! After the sweets "left my system" the cravings eased, and I worked myself back around to a healthier diet. But being ABLE to eat the protein was key. Might be something worth exploring anyway. I will say the weight coming off this time is MUCH slower going than the first time with the band, and I am not eating more, I am actually moving more----and snacking much less, it is just slower loss....hate that! Good Luck

Sooooo happy for Haydee!! I sent her my happy wishes on FB, since I could not get on here. Life is still kinda blah, but it's ok. Seriously considering the change in jobs. I am enjoying working, and I really like the work I am SUPPOSED to be doing. It is the new "do 2 jobs for 1 check" crap I am not liking, and the office manager, is taking a crappy attitude over my not liking it. So I am sure that is part of my blah. Well I am off to cook some dinner, and will check in later tonight. Hope everyone is good-----I'll read when I get back. XOXOXO

Sorry Klausy abused you Pamela.....maybe I need to go visit him. I am in a seriously dark mood, very depressed, and feeling kinda angry as well. all without reason. I would probably feel better if I could just cry and get it over with.... Rick didn't do anything, he has been trying all day to raise my spirits. We went to dinner with my parents, as a late birthday dinner for my Mom, Manda and Kinsey went. I didn't even eat. The waitress pissed me off over the sides options---and she was being hard nosed over it, so I just cancelled my order. Earlier, the guy in the cell phone place pissed me off so bad, I am still using my Razr, and he lost the sale on the new phone. I have to snap out of it, or it might be an interesting week at work. Think Rick will be glad to see me go at any rate, he is confused. And I cannot very well tell him the problem, when I do not know what the problem is. Will check in tomorrow. Everyone take care.

Rick is gone......off riding his new chopper! Scary stuff the first ride! Hoping all the brake lines and bolts, and welds and all hold like intended!! He called and all is well. Bike looks amazing going down the road! Other than thinking about going to a movie, I didn't have any issues with the guys being here working on the truck. I enjoy them, the ones that were here are ones I like, and enjoy having around. It was the same way when we had kids at home, they all gathered here, seldom did we just have our own kids, there were always extras!!! Now there are no kids, but the guys all gather here---Rick has the popular house!!! LOL Only 2 stayed later--the kid with the truck, and another single guy---so I fixed dinner, fed them, and they sat around the table takking til almost midnight! I read, listened, watched a movie---all at the same time. Now.....if he stays gone on the bike too long, I will be unhappy!!! He is off all week, he can go solo riding. I do not want to be home alone all day---and I know he knows that, so he better come home sooner rather than later!!! LOL He will, he is a smart man! Guess I will go put clothes on and maybe some make up so I can be ready to go when he gets back. Not sure what I want to do yet-----but something! See y'all later!