Kat817

Long, but good day. I feel like crap, thinking about seeing a Dr. tomorrow. Sinuses are infected, and throat hurts, running fever, the usual crud everyone has. But I feel it dropping lower in my throat, headed for my lungs....then I get really sick. Son showed up, didn't speak for awhile to anyone, there were enough here that there was chaos, so it didn't matter, then he began doing just as I said and acting like nothing happen. Rick told him, it was a family holiday, and he was not going to bring anything up, but they WERE going to discuss what was said, there was a non commital kind of grunt, nothing more. Manda brought a guy she has seen a few times, but they went to school together, and his Mom and I did chemo together back a few years ago. He is a nice kid, but her polar opposite! She is very political, and he is the opposite, she is vegetarian, and he has yet to meet a veggie he likes he jokes! But he had his 2 year old daughter, and we all had fun. They fit in well. I think they are just friends, but who knows!!! Her vegetarian dinner was awesome she said, and everyone seemed to like the normal dinner. Ricks Mom and Dad refused to come to dinner, they went out for chinese, then come to visit us, and then to go visit his sister, but refused to eat with either of us. I do not have enough room for her family of 4 daughter, who are all grown with families too. I simply do not have the space, my home is little. And we were not invited there, she made it known, She actually made it a point to tell us we were welcome anytime, but it was too much for my family to be included too. Which is reasonable, but if I am gone, and take the kids, that leaves my Mom and Dad and brother alone.....and I can't do that. So if they want to pout and eat chinese, more power to them. I packed leftovers to take them tomorrow, as a gesture to say "here ya go, I don't feel too bad for you!" Rick was upset. Youngest DD did not make it til almost everyone was gone, but that is normal. I am glad it is all over, cleaned up, and I can do nothing. I normally love this holiday, and I did not even decorate my house this year! Bah Humbug!! LOL Well I am off to watch Breaking Bad, and go to bed, hoping I feel tons better tomorrow. Hugs to all of you, hope your days were wonderful!

Well Rick made it home, we got aome more work done in the laundry/pantry/garage....it is able to be walked through, and that in itself is an improvement! Got my ribs cooked, brisket is cooking away. Got the back porch cleaned.....then Kinsey come over and we dyed 18 eggs, and had a blast!! We made special designs, and just had fun! She helped me make a macaroni salad, and make some wild rice to fix in mushrooms for her Mommy and Auntie ( DD's are vegetarians). Then we spent the afternoon taking turns hiding and hunting eggs in the yard! We forwent any "organized" Easter Egg hunts! We went last year, and in her age group they just had eggs dumped on the ground, and thousands of kids, and parents were horrid. So we just did not even mention them. She giggled and hid them as hard as she could for Papa, then did the hot....warm....cold thing to help him find them. She had fun. Tomorrow they will have an egg hunt at church, and people will be nice about it! Rick and I are going to dinner as soon as he finishes putting a fuel filter on Gary's bike. Our work list seems to have no end this weekend!!! Then just between paragraphs now....my phone rings, it is my DIL, asking what she should bring tomorrow, and what time......WTH? We figured they would go to her families, and ignore us the way things are. But he is going to try to pull the old "pretend it never happen" routine. Gary is here now so we will wait to discuss how to handle it when we are alone. Y'all are part of my 'alone' LOL.....you know what I mean!! Well I am off to get dressed to go, and maybe make a cheesecake. Lots to do still......and now ponder the son and DIL thing......

Hey girls, Rick and I had a productive night, we got the cabinets changed out in the pantry area. Got new fluorescent lights put up in there and the rest of the garage area. We moved things, and threw things away, and attempted to start organizing (again---house is just tooo small!!) we worked til about 11, come in took a shower and crashed. I ma coming down with a sinus infection, my head hurts, throat hurts, and my nose is bleeding.......but I powered through! Slept in a bit this morning, got up, was trying to get the gumption up to start again, and Rick got called in to work! GRRRRRR Now I have disaster in every corner, to try to repair on my own...feeling like hell! Isn't that about right??? On the bright side, when we change out washer and dryer, it will begin to take on a whole new look out there! I want to do it slowly, and pay cash for it as we go! I do not want to bust into savings, or payment anything. Got email yesterday, they added Motley Crue to our Sturgis line up!!! It is going to be their only stop in America on this tour they are on. Much of their music is not something I care for, but they have a few songs I really like, so I am ok with seeing them. Jenn--brisket is easy the way I cook it! You have to cook it loooooong and slow, because it is a muscle meat, and tough otherwise. Now when I tell you this you will think I have lost my mind. I got this from family who runs an actual TX restaurant!! Take a full brisket--flat works best for slicing--there are 2 or 3 different cuts from the one area, the others are kind of triangle in shape, the rectangle "flat" cut is easiest for cooking and slicing nicely. Take it, put it in a large roasting pan fat side up, season with garlic powder, then spread a can of concentrated orange juice over the meat-using as much of the can as you need to cover the meat with a decent glaze of the orange juice---not diluted, full strength concentrate. Then cover the pan tightly--either with a lid or with foil crimped down tightly over the roaster (I do both, foil then pop on the lid). Bake it at 250-275 degrees. I cook mine overnight. When Rick leaves for work I take it out, leaving it covered tightly, and let it cool. Once it is cool, remove the foil, there will be black in the bottom of the pan---it is the sugars from the OJ. The meat will NOT taste like orange juice. I put it carefully onto a baking sheet, slice it length wise first, then into slices. Then I drizzle it with BBQ sauce, and before dinner that night I pop it into the oven long enough to heat it again. If you try to slice it hot, it shreds like a roast. And electric knife works great on it. Typed out it sounds like a lot of work, but it is really pretty simple, the longest stretch is cooking, and I do it while I sleep!!! Do not open it until it cools, the citric acid in the OJ will tenderize the meat, and flavor it. If you want the smokey flavor you can add a few drops of liquid smoke to the pan with the OJ. I cook babyback ribs, and racks of ribs the same way--just not so long. Smothered in the OJ, baked slow, and then we finish them on the grill with the sauce---to crisp them up, but the meat slides right off the bone! That is what I am cooking today!!! Going to cook the brisket today, as well, so it will be ready for me to heat to eat tomorrow! Does anyone watch the show on AMC called Breaking Bad? Well I have hours and hours of work.......guess I will get to it. Congrats on the job issue Jenn!!

LOL same here...I am up. I am getting ready to go into town and take Easter things to my 2 oldest grandkids, well to drop them off with their other grandma. Then to DD's to take Corvins. Might meet Rick for lunch. MIL called this morning, trying to talk like all was normal, she never once mentioned the elephant in the room.....typical. I talked to her very normally, she is old, and has been stressed enough lately. If she wants to call me I will talk to her fine. I will not do the same with my DIL as much as she thinks I should. We have to make ourselves understood. Sooooo glad it is the weekend! I am cooking brisket for Easter, it was something my Dad loves, I mentioned it and Rick was in total agreement! Not your average Easter meal, but it will work! I am also going to make some stuffed portabellas, for the girls, and likely my Mom, I think she sounded like she would prefer that to brisket!!! I'll check back in later.....

Suzie, the window motor is EASY to replace! it is a couple of plastic plugs, and the only expense besides the motor itself which should be between 80 & 120, I'd guess, is about a bucks worth of clips to put the door panel back on with. Either when you do it or have it done, have them check the condition of the track, if it looks worn, replace it then, where you combine your labor costs. Jenn, I suck too....I saw the birthday announcement on FB, but I never receive anything from any of them besides Pamela. But it showed me what they thought of me quite simply and quickly. I have friends that we don't always agree on everything! We are still friends, but apparantly with them we were never really friends....it's life, it happens, and I learned! IMHO they lost a good group of women, and it is truly their loss. Tracy, sorry your friends break up is so heart rending, I understand some of what you are going through. I have been in a zoned out place with the mess with my son. Rick is adament, we stand our ground. And not enable him to act out like this. His Mom (MIL) is babying son, and mad at us for not moving on like it never happen---which is what he wants. To be able to rage and then act like it is normal to talk to a parent or anyone like that. It is not, and it is not acceptable. In the meantime, I am heartbroke, I am not going to Tball practice, son does not want us there. Well actually he said that the other day, now he has his wife call and tell us when it is, so we know we are welcome, but HE does not have to atone, apologize or in any way acknowledge he acted like a horses ass......sorry, I am going to shut up about it, it just weighs so heavy on my mind. I miss my boys....but mostly I am scared for my son, I know this is signs of what affects his Mom, and she has been through hell, I want more and better for him, but HE has to recognize it....and has yet to do so. Rick is thinking we should buy chickens, and raise chickens up on our property here. He wants fresh eggs. Build a chicken coop, raise chickens, feed chickens, so what do ya think, in the end, eggs about $12 a dozen???!!! LOL Right now if it would relax him and make him happy, I would build it myself. Tracy the finances suck! We have similar issues through the years with Rick's ex. At one point she was obtaining credit using his info like they were still married. We got it stopped but it still reported in on him, and she does it knowing everytime your credit is inquired on it lowers your score.....and there is nothing we can do short of a new civil suit each time she does it....and that is expensive! I have days I enjoy the yard work Cindy---most of them in the Spring and in the Fall, the heat of summer, I am like you and avoid it!!! Last year we did our yard AND the neighbors, but looks like he will be able to do his own this year. Too bad he is not well enough to do ours too!!! JK Rick has no issue with mowing......I hate the constant dealing with watering........but it is less yucky than the fireplace in the winter...so I'll take it. Speaking of which, guess I will go get some wood. We have had, sun, clouds, rain, blowing sideways rain, snow, blowing sideways snow, and lots and lots of wind today......snow.....green grass and yellow daffoldils poking through the snow. So no cooking out here. Pork chops on the stove! See y'all in awhile!

Sorry about the weather not cooperating Michelle! I actually washed my car today, the brakes were sqeaking, so I knew it was really grimy!! As for your hysterectomy, it is a wonderful thing! Ranks right up there in competition with my band! I would not trade for either of them! I had a fully open surgery---from hip bone to hip bone, and pubic bone to belly button! But I had cancerous endometrial tissue to be removed. I was down for about a month---not lifting, not driving, that kind of thing. I was limited in my doing for a full 6 weeks, but I felt great after a couple of weeks. I have never taken any form of HRT, have never had any issues. I went through much of the menopause type issues prior to surgery--because the cancer had choked off my ovaries. So.....I have done just fine without any HRT, and I will be the big 50 this summer. Had lunch with Marie, and we sat and talked for well over 2 hours! I went and washed and vaccuumed my car, and come home and fixed dinner. Was an uneventful day. No communication at all with either the son or the inlaws. Looking to get a pissy call from his siblings over it in the next day or so. But Rick is standing strong that he is not enabling him in his actions anymore. It is time for him to see a Dr. and get some medication for his bi polar issues. Will just ride it out, keep my mouth shut, and see where it all lands. Thanks for letting me vent to y'all! Will check in tomorrow. My Mom and I are heading to town with Kinsey to get her Easter shoes, and to get things for Easter dinner. Not sure what to have.....what have you all got planned???? Ideas??

Suzy, I think that Cindy can give you valuable insight and help in helping you to get what all Gia should have available to her. Much of the time that is our barrier, simply not knowing what to ask for and what should be done for us. I am so thankful she chimes in on that! Thanks Cindy!!!! I also think Gia is VERY lucky to finally find herself in an environment conducive to her learning, and one that is consistant. Homework first today, as well as tomorrow and Friday---not dependent upon crazy Dads mood. Hard to say if she has help, and has the supplies she needs how she might excel. I hope she does, she has a hard life, I hope it is not harder than it has to be. With kids like that, I always wonder if they were called names at home, or even at school, because they are fully understanding of what they mean. Glad things are still going well for the 2 of you. Cindy, has your student mellowed out at all, I know you were hoping he would when he felt welcome and accepted in your class. I worried about you whether something had happened with him! I am such a chicken~~ I would likely have thrown in the towel. Glad you are braver, and can make a difference in their lives! Jenn, enjoy your planning on the Spring Fling. There will always be reminders of Kev. ALWAYS. But as each day passes, now that you have really put it behind you, it will change how those memories affect you. Someday down the road, you will smile at memories of him before his accident, and be able to place him into 2 different people categories. Before the accident and After the accident. You'll get there, and someday you will be truly happy where you are at, and be able to look back at it differently than you can at this point. It is like death, and there are many stages to go through. Suzie, are you still planning to be through here in Sept.? So exciting!!! Tracy, how is Macy doing with her school stuff? Cindy and Suzy, made me think of how she was doing as well. Sandals, would be ok maybe today but we are due to drop back into the high 40's & low 50's later in the week. Besides I need a pedi BAD after winter!!! But our grass is getting green, and daffodils, and hyacinths, and tulips are all coming up. YAY!!!! Michelle, you selling yarn today? Or building fence? No change on the son situation. Trying very hard to not be snarky and post something on my FB!!! DIL usually does that kind of thing to me, and it pisses me off so bad, I am restraining myself. I hate when she does--airs everything, and puts me to having to defend us as all the family is on both our friends list. She will do it today when he is at work, just waiting for it........ Well I am off to shower so I can go have lunch with Marie. Then I think I will come home and try to clean some in the laundry/pantry area. We have new cabinets for the pantry.....what a mess that is going to be to change out!!!

Hey girls~ Long day here....son is on a rampage. Not sure what REALLY set him off, but he chose to blame it on everyone and everything else, which sad to say is pretty normal for him. I would not admit this to just everyone, but I know you all know I love him, I just totally and completely dislike how he acts sometimes. It scares me, I see the bi polar issues his Mom has manifesting in him, and he refuses to see it......scares me, all the while his actions infuriate me. So.....spent the day dealing with his drama. Took my FIL to the urologist today, they do not think it is prostate cancer, they think he just basically needs it roto rootered. Sounds painful....but they say it is minor as far as procedures go.... My inlaws are on my "do not call" list right along with son, they enable him. They rely so much on him, and he knows it, and they baby him and allow him to act out with no consequences. His wife puts up with it, and so do they, so he feels it is us at fault. So for awhile I am avoiding contact with any of them. Poor Rick is wavering between upset and totally furious. Won't bore you with all the details....just bare with me for a few days while I have a break down! Going to lunch with my friend Marie tomorrow, then Wed. my Mom and I are going to take Kinsey to buy new Easter shoes. Got the kids Easter baskets put together today---spoiled little beasts!!! LOL Guess I will go play some Solitaire---y'all have a good one, will check in tomorrow!

Sunday morning~~~I've read the paper, fixed Rick some breakfast, and am sitting here eating a bit of cottage cheese---morning is not my usual eating time! Worked out to where he was off yesterday, so we went to Durango, hit a motorcycle swap meet, where we bought a hundred bucks worth of parts, and traded a bunch, and did the biggest business, with the guy across the street!!! LOL Well it was his booth, but the stuff we got was from a friend of his. We had a good time, walked around downtown for a bit. Come home, went out to dinner. Was a non cooking day. We met Becky for breakfast, they ate, I snipped a couple bites from Rick, and was way enough! She and Gary were fighting, from the night before, so only she come to breakfast, Gary was pouting, refused to go or to go to Durango, because he was mad at Beck.....we just avoided it! Except Rick, without even knowing what they were fighting about made it worse!! Half of their fight was Gary refusing to go to dinner unless it was someplace that he could get a beer....the other half was him refusing to pick up after himself. So she walks in when she gets here to go to breakfast, and I was not ready yet (she was 20 minutes early---which is so NOT Becky!) I was getting ready, and she and Rick were talking. We had been laying on the couch the night before watching The Blind Side, and he had taken his socks off, when we went to bed he left them there, so when she sat down he saw them on the floor and picked them up and took them to the hamper, and she about come undone!!! Ranting and Raving about how hard was that, because Gary cannot do it! LOL So I guess she threw a hissy before she left, went around to all the tables he had stuff piled on, and knocked it off onto the floor----and then left. I have been afraid to call and see how things are! LOL They are nuts! They both work full time decent paying jobs-------hire someone to come in once a week or so, and quit fighting about it! He is over 50, she is not going to change him now, they have been married since she was 16 years old, you would think she would have discovered he had faults a few years ago!! Rick and I do not fight like that, it freaks me out! I get mad, not usually at him, and yell and carry on, and he looses it sometimes about things, but we are neither one confrontational with one another---more so with others! Becky and Gary we refer to as "The Bickersons" they snipe at one another all the time! I just talked to her on the phone, told her I told you guys about them, she said to tell you he is still a pig, and she is still right! He snorted in the background when she said it! They crack me up! Tracy, we are built similarly, weight in the front, not in the hips etc. And the PT told me that is part of the problem with my back, that going from relaxed to it having both all the weight from my breasts AND the belly suddenly, caused a spasm that would last until the weight was removed for a period of time, usually over night, only to begin again the next day. She said if I would do the warm ups, it would help, and it has....hope it continues to help you too! Michelle, what a good friend you are, working for nada!!! But what a great way to network if you do want to get a small part time job. Lots of people to come face to face with, and word of the owner....hope you enjoy yourself!!! Suzanne, glad to hear that Sister is settling in and healing from her surgery. It is not a long recovery, but it does cause some pain. People want to act like it is nothing because you have no real incision!! My one knee, that they did the patella (kneecap) release on, was a long recovery, and no one "got it". The meniscus clean and repair on the other one, was a week or less in me getting almost back to normal, the knee cap was more like 6 weeks, and by then the scabs were even gone from the poke holes! Both were totally worth it tho!!! Wish I could catch your cleaning bug....I am sooo lazy! Jenn, enjoy your day reading!! I am off to help Rick measure where the new carport is going to be off the side of the shop......$$$$$$$ it never ends........see y'all later!!

Wish it was that easy for all of us Jenn, I would have us all at goal, and staying that way!!! I can wish with the best of them!!! My Grandma used to tell me "If wishes were fishes we'd eat them for breakfast" My Dad had another about wishing in one hand, that isn't worth repeating!!! LOL It's dreary outside, and we have a wind advisory for the afternoon. Yuck. For years and years my mail come in the mid afternoon, now we have a new carrier, and she delivers it in the morning, at like 9 AM---I hear someone on my porch and freak out thinking someone is here! Strange, how you get used to things certain ways. So far the day seems without things to be done.....little things, need to go pick up Ricks Rx. But lazy day. Wish it was a regular week, Rick would be off the next 2, but with this schedule, since he is chasing frac this week, he works this weekend. The paycheck will be nice, but I miss him. He just called and said he wanted SOS for dinner---he had heard someone talking, and it sounded good. I am always hounding him for dinner ideas, and then when he has one, it is always sooooo wierd!!! LOL Well I better go make my calls. I have to check on MIL, or her feelings get hurt! Will talk to y'all later!

Kinsey has bugged us for over a month to see ToothFairy. We kept delaying, and she kept begging. Well today is the last day, and I felt bad! It is a movie, and she wants to see it, and I know how I feel when Rick puts me off from seeing one I want to see. So we went to see ToothFairy. She laughed, she thought it was good. It was about what you would expect. There were things she totally missed, the play of words, the Fairy things....but she laughed a lot. I enjoyed being with her. about half way through she climbed into my lap--so I got to spend some good time just holding her and snuggling, and smelling her sweet hair---just loving on her! I kept calling her Puffy Muffles all day---she still giggles! I have rice frying for dinner--I have the bourbon chicken waiting. We will go to Connors Tball practice, then come home, I will scramble the egg, stir it all together, and dinner will be done. Easy Peasy. Kinsey wants some to take home. Manda will let her have it all, and she will eat hers minus the chicken. She is good about fixing meat for Kinsey. Then Rick will head to bed early, I am sure he has to be out by 3 AM tomorrow. They are going out into the reservation, and it is a long ways on the dirt---and it is supposed to storm. Hopefully they get in and the job done and back out, before the roads get bad! Glad your sisters surgery went well Suzanne, I prayed for her good outcome, and strength for you!!! LOL. True story! Tracy--I hear ya on the cost of the fills, as well as being ready to do it. I am not wanting any fill, but I know I have to BE ready in spirit, or I will hurt myself! My SIL and nieces still fill and unfill and will, she came so close to dying, and she has not changed a bit, she throws up all the time, and goes from super tight to unfilled several times a month. She has regained about 40 pounds I'd guess, and she wants it gone immediately. She fills tight, and thinks it should kill her cravings, and weight should fall off. It doesn't. The more times you lose it, I think the harder it gets. Then she irritates it, cannot swallow anything, gets dehydrated, unfills completely, goes to the ER for and IV and then it starts all over. Crazy. I just plug along, and have been the same weight for months. I want to lose more, but I guess I have not wanted it bad enough yet. Soon I keep saying!!! Jenn, have fun with your planning, and emotionally, just let the feelings come, and then they will go too. You cannot wish yourself to be rid of them and they magically go, anymore than we can wish ourselves rid of the weight and it automatically go away. Would be nice tho huh??!! Cindy, Michelle, Laura, Suzy......where are you?????

Off to take Miss Kinsey to the movie. Connor does not like movies, he wants to talk, and wants the lights on....and is non stop motion. Kinsey likes to lift the arm between the chairs, snuggle up, keep the popcorn close, and watch. She is my movie partner. She soooooo wants to see Alice in Wonderland, but I am told it is too intense for her. Dang it! Rick left for work at 1:30 this morning! He went to bed at 6 last night! Kinsey was here, it was skate night, and we woke him up laughing. She saw some guy on Survivor on TV who was very well built, and she tried to say "wow he has puffy muscles" instead it come out of her mouth as "wow he has puffy muffles" So all night we giggled over Puffy Muffles. Today we will go where we will not wake anyone! BBL----everyone better check in, getting worried!!

I think getting exact number would be near impossible. A couple of months ago, my Dr. called me to see how it was going, I had not seen them in a year. My Dr.is 6 hours away, so, since there had been no problems, and especially through the winter, I do not even think about going to see him, it is over several trecherous mountain passes! I faded into the woodwork, because I was simply maintaining. I am slowly working to lose some weight regained during a stressful time in my life, but overall, it has been no issues, so no check in with the Dr. And I am sure I am not alone in that. Not to mention the patients who change Dr.'s when problems arise. Even without problems, I was banded in MX, and have a Dr. here closer--even tho it is 6 hours away! To get exact numbers would be really difficult! Good Luck all!

Well Tracy, do you need a fill? Maybe if you get one, you can "start over". Tell yourself you were JUST banded. Do the liquids---like in a 5 day pouch test---then work back into it. I personally will do better when our weather changes. I sit here at the computer if I am at home. If I can get outside, I DO something. I can work in the yard etc. You have a nice new house, with a nice new yard, so you have somewhere to work!!! I understand the depression. I also understand a bad back. I have been extremely lucky with mine, and since I have lost weight, it has made a huge difference in it. I herniated L4 L5 at the S1 station. I did several weeks of PT with it, and have done stretching exercises almost every day since PT. I do them in the morning, in bed, before rolling out, just limber up the muscles a little bit, so they don't spaz out. That was a non medical suggestion given to me by my PT therapist. She said most of her patients reported better days if they stretched and warmed the muscles before putting strain on them by getting upright. So every morning I lay in the warm bed, on my back knees bent, and allow my legs to fall to the left and hold, then push a little further and hold, you know just push it a bit. Then to the right, same thing. Then I curl my knees up to my chest and hold. Opens all the vertabrae up. Then I just stretch, arms above the head---open it all up. Then I roll my top half--shoulders to the right and then to the left. Then one more time I bend the knees and let them drop to each side. Takes less than 2 minutes. I no longer do the daily exercises she gave me. But I faithfully believe in the morning ones! On the days I jump up without them---if someone comes to the door, or whatever, I have headaches, or backaches that day. Might be in my head, but it seems to be so. The last MRI I had of my back, the herniation had retreated by over 37%. Nerve paths have regenerated, and I am no longer in constant pain with it, but it will flare occasionally, but has not been BAD in years now. I remember the pain, and refuse to stop the stretches and find out if it helps that way!!! If I can help you reclaim your MOJO in any way, let me know, I will do it gladly!!! Put a call in to my Uncle, he is my voice of reason in the medical field. He said blood clot is not good. The proximity to the brain is scary. But he said if it is, it could have been there for awhile, and be causing pain and inflamation only when it is getting bigger. He was kind of iffy about the treatment plan, but said, it is all a sort of guessing game due to her age, and the inability to withstand some of the more invasive tests. So....we will enjoy the time, and go as close to back to normal as we can. In other words she can go back to annoying the crap out of me!!! LOL Rick is very relieved, I do not plan to share the info I got with him, or the other siblings. It is good for them to relax some. DIL wants me to go with her to the grocery store. I don't really want to go. I am going to stay home and do laundry, strip the bed, all the things I have let slide. Might keep Kinsey tonight while the girls practice. Will check in with everyone later today since I am gonna stay home!!!!

Well another day, and more DRASTIC changes! The oncologist, was still uneasy about the "look" of the lesion on my MIL's lung, so he got together with the radiologist who read the CAT scan, and the oncology phlebotomist, and they are questioning whether the spot could be a blood clot. So....the new plan is not to biopsy it...they do not want to take a chance if it is, of dislodging it. So they are going to work up some medication changes, and up her dose of blood thinners, continuing the coumadin, while adding Plavix, and lovenox shots bi weekly, and are going to rerun the scan in 2 weeks. Meanwhile, my SIL in Denver who is with the insurance company hired an attorney to deal with the Dr. who told her it was without question cancer, and she had between 3 and 6 months to live. He told her if she had a biopsy it would cause it to spread, and chemo or radiation would kill a woman her age, that her best option was to go home and be made comfortable, and gave her hospice information. So when we heard, we went to the oncologist, and all this has transpired since. It shook the family, and we are not looking to get rich, but he gave outright FALSE information! She has the picture he drew for her of where the lesions are, and there is nothing supporting the things he wrote on it, or told her. So....we are cautiously optomistic. The oncologist told us, lung cancers are one of the most commonly misdiagnosed cancers there are, because there can be so many types of benign growths in the lungs due to the fact we breath them in. And we all have to breath!! Made me think of you Suzanne!! So.....hoping to get good news. I know she is 82 and will not live forever, but heck her Mom lived to be 98! And the issue of predisposition to similar cancers, I want to know, if Rick is more likely to develop lung problems, ya know!? I know that everyone has to pass away, I hope for her as for anyone, dear to me, that it is easy and pain free. So hoping this is very good news, how they will deal with the blood clot has not been fully decided, IF it proves to be such. Will let ya know! Rick is in bed, he has to leave at 2:30 AM! This is his week in the field under the new breakdown at work. He has not worked in the field, in over 5 years! Now he will be out one week a month. He said the hours kinda suck, but he is enjoying the being out there a lot, and is going to hate going back to the shop! Hope it all works out ok. Having to pack a lunch again.....forgot what all I used to put in it! LOL Supposed to rain and snow tomorrow. I am going to cook something for us and the inlaws, then I plan on doing NOTHING! I ended up taking Mom to town today, she has been feeling neglected I think! Not consciously so, but she was I think!!! She likes to go once a week or so, and she had her surgery 2 weeks ago, then I have been at the inlaws non stop, and she was sure glad to go shopping again! LOL Talked to my SIL, she said when she got home yesterday, it was well over 60 degrees out still....a little windy, but nice, they went out to dinner, and wore no coats. Tonight there is a foot of snow in her yard!!! YUCK! Well I am off to bed. Not feeling real sleepy, but just want to veg!

Hi all~ Wanted to check in and update. We took MIL to the oncologist yesterday--the actual one who will be treating her case. He is not as pessimistic as the other. He said the one large spot is problematic. With her age, she is not a surgical candidate. He is not concerned with the small areas, and disagrees that there is liver involvement, due to the recent blood work, her liver function is spot on normal, so he says he is going to leave it alone and allow it to continue functioning as normal. Since she had never had it scanned before, the lesion they found may be something she has had for years and be uninvolved. He is also approaching the small lesions in the lungs that way. But the big one which is aver 5 cm....has to be dealt with, and found out what its make up is. If you make an OK sign with your thumb and index finger that is approximate size. It is on the peripheral side of her right lung--which means it is not on the inside near the heart, it is on the outside, nearer her armpit. So the plan is to sedate her, and do a needle biopsy through the back. Problem is she is on coumadin for the blood clot! So I am giving her a shot---forget the name, it is a new one, much like the Lovenox I gave her before, only this one only needs given once a day--I give it for 4 days, beginning this weekend, then they will biopsy then I give it for 3 days, then she goes back on her coumadin, and we see him on the 1st of April for the results. As of now the plan is to use radiation only for treatment. He said he can quite easily see the ability using the radiation to extend the previous 3-6 months to live, to 1-2 years. Which at 82 is good. He said with her not being an active person, due to age, she can get by with less lung capacity. Surgical removal is ideal, but opening her chest is ill advised with her age, and blood clot history. So there is where we are. Good news as we all see it. Family has went back to Denver for now. BIL will be back this weekend, and will be here to take FIL to the urologist this week, to find out about the blood in the urine issue. We figure he too has cancer, likely of the prostate---he has had prostate issues before. So will figure that one as it comes at us! I have fixed enough food they are ok for a day or so. We will be popping in and out, but let them settle back into a routine of NOT having someone with them 24/7. Then SIL and I will take turns bringing food in. I am on the hunt today for plastic plates with sections, and lids. So I can fill them and deliver them, and pick up the used ones. Something like a lunch tray with a lid would be PERFECT! That is my quest!!! Rick worked late last night, got home about 9. He ate, we went to bed about 10 and I slept til the alarm rang at 5:30 this morning, got up with him for about 45 minutes, then went back to bed! Slept until almost 9:30!!! I was totally exhausted! I feel pretty doggone good right now!! LOL I better get myself dressed though and get on with all my stuff for today. I have to take the swing canopy frame to the canvas place today to get a new cover put on it....and buy a cushion for it. MIL said she sure missed her swing, so Rick and I are revamping it for Mothers Day, a bit early, so she can sit in the sun, and get better! Thanks for all the well wishes guys here and on FB. Miss chatting with you all!

Well it's been a long day---once again spent doing a lot of cooking~ my DH is getting really tired of it! Anyway we also did a lot of playing cards, and Rick and I took Connor and Kinsey to town, and let them have lunch and play in Burger King. Then Rick went and bought Kinsey a new bike so she could ride out there with Connor. She simply is NOT the daredevil he is! Not that it is a bad thing, he is wild!!! He worked with her on her riding, he is much more patient with her whining "I can't" than I am!!! LOL He and our son got the old John Deere up and running---it is old, it is one of the old "Popping Johnnies" It has the smoke stack that goes pop pop pop while it runs, it is soooooo cool, and it is MINE!!! Well as I say it has been a long day.....so I am gonna take Suzies advice' date=' and make my hubby the last thing I do tonight!!! LOL Could not resist Suzie!! I'll check in in the morning!!! [/b']

Well it is almost 1 AM, and I am just getting home. I wake up, and go to the inlaws. BIL and his wife went home today, SIL is still here, and will be until following the oncologist appt. Today my FIL tells us he is again passing blood in his urine, so we took him to Urgent Care, and were told it could be anything from a rupture to cancer. There is most definitely blood in the urine, but no infection. So he sees a urologist a week from Monday. From there we went to get his hearing aids adjusted, then went back to the house. Rick wanted to come home from work and just veg out, he is tired, but his Mom had a fit. She wants everyone there, otherwise she has too much time to sit and think.....so he stayed awhile, then I sent him home, and we sat around and played cards and dominos for hours....thus I am just getting home. I spend most of my time, cooking and cleaning. At dinner tonight there were about 20 of us. We went really simple and had a frito pie bar set up. I made the pulled pork the night before and there were closer to 30 of us. I had a huge crock pot full, and there was not a bite left! I have spaghetti sauce thawing to make for tomorrow. Then we plan on going out on Sunday, and after that it is going to be alternated with my SIL here to help feed the folks....I am gonna go broke! Not to mention all of them, hit the table for games, and leave me with the mess......one is notorious for it! Anyway.....all is well. Jenn glad court is over, now the real healing can begin, with nothing hanging over your head. Sounds silly, but it does make a difference. Rick has been on a happy countdown, we finish the Child Support in June, so he has been telling everyone only 3 more months, and was sooooo happy. Now he says since that Dr. told his Mom she might have only 3 months, he feels horrible wishing it to hurry. Things change so suddenly. Tracy, Suzie, Michelle, Suzy, Cindy......I am thinking of you ALL, and hoping we get some home time this weekend, and I will catch up....till then, everyone hang in there, and take good care of yourselves and those you love......I'll talk to you all soon!!!

Fly by check in~~ Family made it in safe. MIL is resigned herself to die. I told her the key was to be "Living with cancer, not Dying from cancer" she told me they were just words it was all the same. She tries to be upbeat, but refers to dying over and over. She wants to talk about it. Wants to talk to us about FIL. But no one will let her talk. My SIL locally her grandkids don't know. They are leaving on Spring Break vacation and they don't want to spoil it for them. Well with all the family in, they of course were there, so where my MIL is scared and needing to VOICE things, she is not being allowed. I mentioned it to my other SIL so she is the big mouth, things might change, we'll see. She is staying through the appt. on Monday. BIL and his wife are going back tomorrow. They have to babysit their granddaughter on Saturdays. Sorry but that just rubs me the wrong way. She is 17 months old. Mom and Dad are neither one working, but that is the day off they usually have so they spend it with her. But these ARE extenuating circumstances, but nope they will not change plans so they can spend a little more time with her now. He comes through on a regular basis with work, but his wife does not care for it here. And her Mom died suddenly without warning, last year, so she resents the fact he wants to be able to spend some time, since she didn't get that. OMG how petty people can be!!!! Anyway, gotta finish my pork--time to pull it and add sauce. Dinner was mine to do for tonight, so I did simple. SIL made chicken and noodles last night. Will check in tonight. Was thinking of you yesterday Suzanne, hope all went well at your cousins funeral. HUGS Tracy---no advice on the job----you saw how I did!!! LOL Suzy---let us know how Gia is doing with you! Cindy--let us know how the boy is settling into class, or not, we are worried abotu you!!! Michelle---how's Reggie doing?? Seriously gotta go!!!

Family is coming in from Denver, and I am off to help my MIL get another bedroom cleaned. I'll check in when I can. Probably late and early. They made my MIL an appt. with the oncologist today, then changed it to a different Dr. on Monday, said he would be better suited for what this is. My SIL is going to be mad, she is headed in for the appt. tomorrow. Because you know, my SIL here and I cannot go to the Dr. with MIL it HAS to be her, she has a medical background. She works for the insurance company! I am being so hateful! I guess it is anger and nowhere to go with it, so everyone gets their share!!! Son turned down his job with this happening. He is so impetuous. I did not want him to go, but just wish for once in his life, he would think something through without just jumping......too much to hope for I believe. The girls handled it better, than he did. They do not live next door either. I better get going. Would prefer to be here today yacking at y'all. Thanks for the prayers!

Hey y'all~ Quick request for prayers for my MIL, and the family. She got her cat scan and blood results and all in today, and was immediately summoned to the Dr.'s office. Looks like cancer began in her liver, and has metastisized into her lungs. Family is trying to process this tonight. FIL is freaking out, and he wants to be taken to Texas so he can just stay there out of the way.....yeah nice job of being supportive....grrrrr I know he is just upset, but c'mon! Anyway, we meet with an oncologist on Friday, and will go from there, the PCP acted like with her age, there is little choice of doing anything. But he is an ass in my opinion anyway. Prayers appreciated as always....thanks my friends!

Awwww Suzie, I am so sorry, I seem to remember you telling us about her accident....is that right? I think you are probably right, the Irish funeral on St. Paddy's will be a combo of mourning, and celebrating, but that is how Irish wakes are---and if your cousin had any of it in her, she would want the life she had celebrated. It is a terrible shame it was cut so short tho. Rick and I had a friend who fell from the ledge at his apartment, when taking out the trash one night. He fell 3 stories, and no one knew, a woman walking her dog found him the next morning. He was very well known in our school. He was really friendly, and an amazing athlete, but his biggest claim to fame in our small school, was that he was the only black student. He was adopted, and he had a hard time with dating. All the parents liked him fine, but did not want him dating their daughters! It was never an issue for me, he was in the IN crowd and I was not!!! I am reading a series of books all set in Ireland, and what little has been said of the funerals, tho, I think you are going to be expecting the right thing. They are innterweaved novels by Maeve Binchy. I was nauseated all day yesterday. My stomach was just yucky no matter what I ate. Lost my lunch, and should have went to liquids, but didn't....ended up losing my dinner too, and was freaked out to find blood. I behaved then. Nothing more by mouth for 12 hours, then on to liquids I am. They are settling well, my stomach has lost the "puky" feeling. Will stick to liquids, and will move on to soup for supper, and then soft tomorrow. I know better!!! My husband was wigging out! He had that massive GI bleed, and he was trying to haul me off to the ER. I told him it was not a lot, and I am not on blood thinners like he was (which is what almost killed him), and if I threw up more, I would gladly go. I did not. I slept well. Got up, was NOT hungry in any way, so did not eat. Finally decided I should drink some, so been doing that. I have regained 3 pounds----maybe this will MAKE me get on it and pay attention to the right way to eat again. I had salad for lunch yesterday, and that is hard to digest anyway, and with my stomach being upset, it was a bad choice. When will I learn????? Well I am off to put up a few Easter decorations.....I feel like I am totally slacking off!! Again Suzie, I am so sorry for your loss...

So glad to hear all the good news Jenn!!! Looks like all the wishes for a great year ahead, are already coming true!!! Keep us up on what all is going on, I know it will take awhile to get a routine, but we want in on all the changes!!! This time change kills me. I can't go to sleep until late as it is, so it makes me sleep in til it seems half the day is gone!!! Went and did some grocery shopping, think I am set for the week. Almost got in a fight --a going to jail kind of fight for me!!! I was walking in, walking behind a man on crutches, with a boot cast on his left leg. We just entered the cross walk into the grocery store when this car comes flying up, swerves around this guy and just goes! There is a STOP sign!! So big mouth me, I yell "Hey Moron, can't you read?" The windows are down, it is lunch hour, and there are 3 high school boys in the car. What he did to his tranny I don't know but he stood that car on it's nose he stopped so fast, and come flying out of the car at me!! Cussing a blue streak! The man on the crutches tells him, "if you lay one hand on her I will wrap this crutch around your head"! He is yelling at me to mind my own F'n business. I told him, ya know if you can't read the stop sign, maybe you shoulda stayed at school! One of the other kids kept telling him "Brad come on, lets go, Brad come on" So I looked over, he is in my face, calling me names, and yelling, causing a HUGE scene. I kept telling him to get out of my face and to slow down. I was repeating it when the manager come out, while the manager was trying to talk this kid into calming down, a couple of the employees, placed shopping carts in his path of leaving, and before I realized they had done that, a cop showed up. They took statements of what happen, from the man on the crutches (whose name I now know, and know he fell on the ice and broke his ankle!) and myself, and told us we were free to go....he told the kid it sounded like he owed us an apology, and the kid told the cop F that--the bit*h has a loud mouth! He was rude, but he was right, I do!!! Unfortunately now I have to worry about any repercussions, and I do not think before I yell!!! So I left the store, and ran to the Sonic!! As I was waiting to pull back into traffic after getting my drink, this guy---late 20's or so, rode by on a bike---he had his hands both in his pockets, and was riding a 10 sp. mountain type bike, hands free. He was in my guess, half keeping his hands warm, and half showing off!!! So he waves to me and rides on, putting his hand back in his pocket. I waited til it was clear and pulled out....just up the road, I passed him, and it made me nervous---if he fell, he would fall right into or under my car! And there is mud and clumps of mud and ice everywhere, the road debris following these storms is bad! He sailed right on through the red light, never looking for cars....and a truck was turning left, just missed him! Still hands free. I have to pass him again, so I changed lanes. Next light, he sails through again, and about half way through, I have no idea what he hit, but he went down and skidded into the curb---if it had not been in a wide open intersection, he would have fallen into traffic!!! When he hit the ground he had not even managed to get his hands out of his coat pocket! A man got out to help him, I didn't. He made me angry!!! I could have been the one to run him over, through no fault of my own! But I'd have to live with it! Moron! Again!! So I come home. Not a good day for me to be out and about!!! I am idiot enough alone without exposing myself to all the others out today!!! LOL Come home, made a salad, 3 times bigger than I will ever be able to eat! LOL So sitting here snacking away at it! Anyone wanna go get in trouble with me????

We had a great day yesterday....even tho I was in a wierd mood all day. Not happy, not sad, not mad, I felt like I was stuck in neutral all day, just waiting to shift into gear.....very wierd! We did some yard work, and we took a great motorcycle ride. Took Kinsey and Connor to breakfast, and spent time with them. Son is again looking to transferring to Shrevesport (I HATE that--truly pisses me off!) so since he is being an ass over it we took the kiddo and went to town!!! He and Kinsey have such fun together! Was a good day. Woke up this morning to 6 inches of snow, and it is snowing as I type! At least the fertilizer we put on the lawn is getting soaked in well. When it soaks in and melts away, our lawn will be pretty!!! All the weather reports said a wet storm was heading at us. So we decided to put the fertilizer on---we put on 50 pounds between the front and back. Then the weather looked great. When the kids left last night, son was laughing that we better get out the water hoses, he could see stars there was not going to be any snow. He just felt it. He was making me mad! He wanted it dry because his work roads are so bad with the wet weather. But lo and behold, early morning brought it on with a vengeance! Made me smile anyway!!! The neighbor laughed at Rick when he said he was putting it on before the storm. He probably isn't laughing so much this morning either!!! Our son has every right to live where he chooses. He did however have children, and when you do that, you then make choices with them in mind, not just yourself. My DIL is not a diligent Mom, she is a loving Mom, but not one to watch close enough, etc. Where they live now is on our property outside of town which is connected to the property my inlaws live on. Connor spends much more time at my inlaws than he does at home. He eats there, plays there, and is given tons of attention there. He has 13 acres of land, he rides his bike, and now his skateboard, and he runs and plays with no traffic, and he follows my FIL everywhere he goes. They are talking about an apartment, in a large complex---because a friend lives there. Connor had 5 grandmas at his party 2 weeks ago, when Garrick turns 1----he will have none. The job son is lookiing at is not paying any more, or does not have any more of a future than the one offered him here----but it doesn't matter he will do what he thinks he wants to and to hell with everything else! I am scared for them, and it is much easier to be angry than it is scared. I am doing nothing today. Making meatloaf for dinner, sitting around reading my book. Sorry to come on and do nothing but complain. But everytime I think about this it makes me mad!!! LOL I spend 2 weeks a year of vacation ferrying family around, and now I get to spend the other chasing them to see my grandkids. What would I do with a vacation just for the sake of vacation anyway?????

Well Suzie, we went not so gradual a taper, it is still longer than I wanted. Lori is that way I may have her take more off still....but it is better that way to go in stages, it is much easier to take more off than too much be gone!!! It is blonde!!! Will add one to facebook, but I cannot size pics for here, I am illiterate!!! If anyone wants to help, I might make a new avatar. I am off to "babysit" Mom while my Dad goes to town. Sorry it irritates me, he would not let me drop the payment for him, and Mom was planning to mail it. So apparantly he just wants to get out. Fine, but I have things to do too. I love my Mom, went and checked on her this morning, and would have this afternoon too, but did not plan on spending 2 hours. He would come see us, but he did not stay for hours when either Rick or I were recovering from surgery! Sounds so petty, I know, but I had plans, and he hits me with this. Anyway....... Suzy, I think you being a newbie at this, and Gia being a newbie to the system, is pretty good together. Some of those kids who have been in several foster homes, and such, know how to work things!!! They have to in order to survive sometimes I know, but I think they would be more inclined to take advantage, and to push to see if you would make them leave too. Where with Gia, she has not been tossed a dozen different directions yet, so she is not as jaded. So glad she had someone to step in! You two will hopefully find your pattern, and settle in. And the whole go home early thing with you....that is ALL kids!! Off to Moms with me.....see ya later.