MaryBnSC

Hi Folks, I had my lapband put in 3 years ago. Hard to believe it's been that long and I'm still wearing the same clothes! I want to share my story. I'm not going to lay all the blame for my 'failure' on me, on the lapband or any one place. I believe there is enough blame for everyone! But honestly, I'm sick and tired of feeling guilty so I've moved on from the anger part. I thought this lapband was the be-all-end-all! I went thru so many hoops to get it. Insurance paid most, but that doesn't mean it was easy! I remember asking the surgeon why he was recommending the band versus bypass. He told me that because I was in overall good health (other than the weight), I really wasn't a candidate for bypass. Right - now anyone who feels a little plump can get it (I know - a bit of an overstatement, but so what). Apparently, my lifelong battle with weight and the 140 extra pounds I was carrying wasn't enough. Fine - the band was still billed as the savior. So what if it took me 2 years versus one year - so I thought then. Here's what I was told. I was told that immediately after surgery, I would have restriction. As a matter of fact, I remember DISTINCTLY the dietician telling all of us hopefuls that we'd never be able to eat more than 1/2 cup of food at any one sitting - ever again. I remember her going thru the whole idea of thanksgiving. Sure you could have stuffing and gravy and turkey and whatever - up to a total of 1/2 cup. It may have been no more than 1 cup. It's been a while, but I seem to remember it being less than 1 cup! Anyway - that's what we were told. I am not imagining it - I can see where she was standing when she said it! We were told we would not have to diet. The only thing we'd have to pay attention to is making sure we were getting enough Protein. This all made perfect sense to my naive brain. If I could only eat less than a handful of food, I'd better make sure it counted, nutritionally. I was told that I would get my first fill within 6 weeks. I had to heal from the surgery. Made sense. I would have subsequent fills every 4 -6 weeks until I hit my 'sweet spot" I was told that there was no way I couldn't lose weight. Here's what I found out: Immediately after surgery, I was STARVING! I was on the Clear liquids, then thicker liquids (milk, etc), then Soups and squishy food, etc. I promise you - I had NO (Zero, nada, nil, nothing) restriction whatsoever. Sure, I was sore and tender, but there was no restriction at all. I remember calling the dietician on about day 4 telling her I was almost nauseous, I was so hungry - all the time. She gave me permission to move on the soups a few days early. I lost weight pretty quick initially . . . .because I wasn't eating!! DUH! I was a good girl and followed their directions to the T - paid for their Protein shakes, etc. I never had any restriction after surgery and before my first fill. None. Zero. I was easily able to eat more than 1 cup of food (lets err on the larger size of food portion). However, I was so scared to do anything against the wishes of the great and powerful Dr.'s, I did exactly as I was told. I lost probably 10-15 pounds before my first fill. First fill comes around. I was OVER THE MOON with excitement! Finally, this very expensive tool I'd purchased was going to actually WORK! ahhhhnah....I drove up to Columbia (SC - where I had my surgery) and finally got in to see the Dr. He gave me a shot to numb the site, then gave me a .25 cc fill. .25cc's. He assured me it was going to make a difference. Thankyouverymuch, go see the receptionist. I made another fill appointment for 4-6 weeks down the road and went home to suck down clear liquids for 3 days. Still no restriction. I went back to this same clinic 2 more times (4-6 weeks in between). They gave me .25 cc fills each time. The 3rd time, the med tech had the audacity to give me lip about not losing as much weight as he thought I should have lost. Poor Poor guy. I let him have it. I told him that this thing didn't work. I had NO restriction at ALL and if they'd actuially LISTEN to me instead of blaming me, patting me on my wittle head and pushing me out the door, we might get somewhere. I told him I hadn't failed - this TOOL failed. They'd sold me a freakin' expensive bill of goods and I was PISSED! I'm the one who worked 18 months to get it. I drove to and from my city to his to see them. I begged, borrowed and pleaded with my insurance company, I went thru the surgery and recovery, I lived on liquid diets. All HE did was show up to work that day and happened to get my chart! Don't tell me I failed! YOU HAVE FAILED ME!!!! I never EVER went back to that clinic. And by the way - it's one of those "Center of Excellence" places. WHO CARES! I ended up finding a great Dr via "FillCenterUSA" online. I had to drive a long way (Denver, NC)and pay more $$ but he was SO much better! He gave me a fill I could actually FEEL! Awesome - but that's a different story. I can pretty much eat whatever I want. I have restriction but it doesn't keep me from eating anything. The whole "you'll never have to diet again" is crap. The band does not stop you from eating junk. It may only stop you from eating as much. But you can easily eat around it. It's up to me to make the right food choices, just as before. Long story .....long....I'm pretty unsold on my lapband. I have 2 family members who had bypass after I had my lapband surgery. I'm the only fat one left. Do I blame it all on this band? Of course not. I make the choices as to what I put in my body and how much I make it move. But do I think these Dr's and companies sell us a bunch of hype? You better believe it. They see us as desperate. The bigger my pant size is when I first walk in their door, the bigger $$ signs they see. This thing is a tool. It is no different and no better, in my opinion, than the points counter I used on WW. It's just a tool. So, I've failed at the lapband thing. So what. Does it define who I am? Nope. I still have it. I probably need a fill, but won't get one done until I am ready to tackle this issue completely. I read somewhere someone else had their failure story and one of the reponses was the "rules" about nutrition, etc. I think I'll print it out. After a while, you forget, you know? That seemed helpful. My point for writing this is simply to tell my story. I'm not looking for sympathy or a good butt chewing. Sometimes, it's helpful just to get it all out and 'down on paper'. So here's to another summer wearing the fat suit on the beach. But Priase God I get to go and play on the beach! With my adoring husband, great kids and their families and the most precious 8 month old granddaughter ever born! Maybe next year, eh??

I agree completely and can see how my response can sound too harsh. I wish you well on your journey to amazing health!

No, I do not belive the surgery is a scam. And with all due respect to cat lady, it amazes me that it's now the answer for a 50 lb weight loss need. I guess when you've been carrying around an extra 100+ lbs, 50 seems easy! However, it's all perspective - my perspective/view is different from where I stand. Cat Lady, if you've researched it and feel confident its what you need and have a great support system in your Dr's and staff - go for it! This is simply my experience. And like the title suggests, the story hasn't ended yet!

Ah! I'm so clever - fill-osophy! Anyway - moving on! I am fortunate in that my Dr. is part of a "Center of Excellence" in bariatric surgery. But then again - maybe they made that up! I doubt it, but I don't have anything to compare it to. Anyway, for banding, they offer the J & J or Realize band - whichever one you choose (I let him choose and he chose Realize). Their fill adjustments (for the Realize Band) are 1st fill - 2cc's, 2nd- 2cc's, 3rd - 1 cc. That's what I was told, anyway (had 2nd fill today). From the looks of what everyone else says, that seems to be fairly common. However, I have a friend who had her surgery in Mexico (great facility/Dr, just cheaper). She didn't have anyone to go to for a fill, so basically did it herself for about 4 months. Then she found a place in NC - the fill center. She was able to go there for a fill and check up. Her fill experience was so completely different - I feel jipped! She went in, laid down on the table and they inserted the syringe. They then tilted the table up until she was upright, with the syringe still in her port. While she was upright (leaning against and strapped to, I assume, the table), they slowly filled her port. They'd fill a little, then have her sip Water. They'd fill some more, and have her sip some more. When she got to the point where she couldn't swallow, they backed out some of the fill (making sure she could swallow), then she was done. Basically, instant sweet spot! When I mentioned this to the PA this afternoon, he said that different centers had different philosophies. Thing is, he really didn't say they were doing anything wrong. He just said that I should be patient. What's up with that??? Anyone else experienced that type of fill? I'm seriously considering checking this out. My insurance pays, but only for a certain amount of fill visits. It's interesting. Mary

Hi Folks, It's been a while since I was here. Not sure why, but for what it's worth, I've determined that I definitely need the comradery (sp??), encouragement, feedback and accountablilty of a discussion/support group. Here is the Readers' Digest Condensed Version of my story: Had my surgery on October 7th. Had my first fill on Dec 6th. At the time of my first fill, hadn't lost much. Got the lecture about what i should be eating, yadayada. Never mind the fact that I was feeling NO restriction. After I left, I realized he was really pushing Adkins - I don't like Adkins. Anyway, the holidays hit and I got busy. And to tell you the truth, I got rebellious! I was mad at this stupid band that wasn't working the way they told me it was going to work! The closer I got to my 2nd fill date (today), the madder I got. By the time I got to the office today, I was ready to let loose on someone. Got on the scale and gained 4 lbs! Great! Isn't it productive when we rebel? Only hurts ourselves! Anyway - get in the room with the PA - poor James. I pretty much laid into him (obviously explaining that I wasn't mad at him - but I was mad, all the same). I explained that I might not have done what I should have done, but they needed to understand that the little device I'd paid dearly for wasn't doing its' job. I told him I felt like I'd been sold a $40,000 bill of goods that wasn't delivering as promised! If I wanted these results, I could have saved myself $39,970 and bought a bottle of Hydroxycut - without the scars, thankyouverymuch! He tried the patronizing route first (not good), saying "do you remember what they told you at the seminar, that you wouldn't feel much restriction until about your 3rd fill?" I said no - it'd been over a year since the seminar and they never mentioned that at all, not to mention all we'd heard from the nutritionist, etc was to expect no more than 1/2 - 1 cup food, at the most. besides, I have a friend who got her band filled one time! They filled it until she couldn't swallow - then backed out a couple CC's and that was it! Sweet Spot! None of this 2CCs at a time crap! To make a long story short (?), I believe he 'heard' me. If not, I like to think he did. It feels satisfying to 'dump' on someone. I got my 2 cc's and my appt for 3rd fill in 4 weeks. But I've come away determined to lose weight before my next visit - whether I feel any restriction or not. I only hurt myself when I take out my frustrations on . . . myself! Makes no sense. But honestly, it PISSES me off! Those seminars are filled with desparate people grasping for a lifeline. They parade a bunch of pretty, slim 'afters' in front of you. You see stars. I didn't expect it to be an easy walk in the park, but I'm telling you - they never EVER said that it'd be months after surgery before I ever felt any type of restriction. And it really pisses me off when they look at me like I'm a total failure! Would I have made the choice to have the surgery? Yes - no doubt. But I'm not an idiot. I'm an adult. Tell me the truth. Don't set me up for feeling like a total failure (again). Warn me a little! Anyway, so much for whining. I'm over it. Now it's time to press on. I'll be on yogurt and Soup for a couple days, then it'll be low carb/hi Protein (south beach-esque), kicking up the walking and getting serious. No more taking out my aggravations on myself! Thanks for listening! Mary

I had my fill appointment in NC with the Fill Center USA doctor. The appointment went very well. He spent a lot of time talking and listening. He talked about what foods to eat, but focused more on the types of foods that most people have problems with (such as bread, red meat, white meat chicken, which was a surprise to me) versus what was best for my diet. He also discussed quantity. Asked questions like "can you eat a whole hamburger (yes)? Are you wanting to eat the fries, etc (no)? How much Protein are you getting a day (apparently, not enough)? Are you drinking a Protein Drink or taking a protein supplement daily (no)? I felt like I was really 'heard'. He never made an attempt to badmouth any of the other Drs or facilities, only seemed interested in my situation. Anyway, the fill went well. He adjusted it until I could comfortably drink Water (took it to where it was uncomfortable, then backed off a bit). Ended up adding another 2 cc's. That was 3 days ago and I feel great. Went out to dinner with friends last night and definitely notice the difference! There is a chance I could have gotten the same 2 cc fill at my regular Dr and had the same results (whenever it is they will actually call and schedule me an appointment - still waiting). But what became clear to me - and I will address this with my regular Dr the next time I see them - is some of these 'centers of excellence' are so concerned about keeping that title, they forget that we are all individuals. As someone else put it, they tend to have an 'assembly line' one-size-fits-all mentality. Maybe they just need someone to politely remind them that we are individuals. I'm down 8 lbs from the morning before the fill, so I'm excited and re-energized again! Mary

Hey Mimi! I'm going to reply to your privately! Mary

I just went for my first visit yesterday (Denver, NC). I was banded in Oct (08) and have had 3 fills for a total of 5 cc's. I still wasn't getting the restriction I needed and was getting very frustrated. My Dr would only put in a teeny, pre-determined amount for each fill, despite the fact I was complaining about no/little (hit and miss) restriction. Weight loss has been very slow. A friend of mine was banded in Mexico and used Fill Center USA for her fills. Her experience was so different than mine, I was intrigued. Fast forward to yesterday. I drove up to NC, met the Dr (Ahigian) and had a great experience. Just as my friend told me, he talked to me for quite a while, then I laid down on his table, he found my port (one stick, no need for numbing), pulled out what was in there (he got 3.5 cc's, explaining that some will always be held in the tubing between band/port), then stood me up (the table tips up) with the needle in the port. Had me drink Water while he adjusted the fill - if the water went down too slowly (should not be restricted) or was painful, he'd back a little out. Took about 10 minutes to get it just right. He ended up putting in a total of 5.5 cc's. I had to stay in the office waiting room, finish another bottle of water within 15 minutes (and be comfortable before I could leave. It was a great experience! And today, someone from FCUSA called me to see how it went. I'll continue to go to my regular band doctor (insurance is covering it), but at least now I feel like someone heard me and I might actually get this tool working the way it was designed! (By the way, if you are checking my math and wondering why I would go to the hassle for .5 cc, he actually added a total of 2 cc's. I'd had 5 cc's before, but only 3.5 was actually in my band. There was probably .5-1 cc in the tubing. I actually saw him take out 3.5 and add 5.5) Mary

I've taken the bull by the horns and have made an appointment with a fill center Dr in NC. I go on Wednesday and am really looking forward to it. This is the Dr my friend goes to. She has done amazing and is a walking billboard for the type of fill he gives. He basically fills until you cannot swallow Water, then backs a little out until you can. From what I understand, I'll have to stay there for a certain amount of time (an hour, maybe?) and within that time frame, be able to comfortably drink a bottle of water. PStroud, I'm happy it's working for you. I can see that your experience has been different than mine. Perhaps you were told it'd take a long time before the band worked. I was not. I distinctly recall sitting in the nutrition class and being told how we'd only be able to keep down about 1/4 cup of food - and would eventually work up to a full cup. Emily was standing right by me and I can picture her as she was saying it. This has nothing to do with how much I like the staff at the clinic. I believe they are doing everything on the up and up. There is nothing illegal or unethical about their actions. It's simply a matter of $$. This a $$ making machine and the more times they can get me to go in there, the more they can squeeze out of my insurance company. You might think I'm whining or being weak. That's fine. But I'm not concerned with what others think. My decision to call the Fill Center was based on comparing my experience and results to another persons experience and results. Hers has been better than mine. My last fill was in February. They said I couldn't come back until the end of March, but they weren't booking March yet and they'd give me a call the first part of March. I've heard nothing. I am simply not going to be patronized, humiliated or treated like I'm a stupid, fat, lazy 2nd class citizen anymore. I am taking it into my own hands. I fully understand that it is up to me to make the changes and the band is a tool. But if the transmission is broke on your car, you don't blame the car make/model for driving poorly - you fix the transmission. Therefore, fix the tool to make it work properly and I'll get this car driving in the right direction. Do you know the only questions I am ever asked by the clinic have to deal with the type of food/drink I am getting? They have never once asked me "how much can you consume in a sitting". Wouldn't that be an obvious question to determine whether or not the band is working or not? (Mechanic: "How's it driving?" vs. "Where are you buying your gas? Do you drive with the windows up or down??") Guess I'm crazy. I just want this $30,000 damn tool that has left scars on my body to actually work! I don't blame the band (the transmission). Right now, I blame the mechanics who won't fix it. Therefore, I think it's time to take my $$ to a new mechanic.

Hi all, I am about 30 days post surgery and am not scheduled for my first fill (and my next appt) until the first week of December. I really wish it were sooner! I have read a couple of posts voicing the same concerns and worries I have - not feeling much restriction, feel like I haven't made as many changes as I should, ... This is totally different than any other weight loss attempt I've done and I feel a little like I'm lost out here! Like I said, wish my next appt was sooner so I could 'connect' again with my Dr., dietician, etc. Last time I saw my Dr (to remove staples), they gave me a couple of books about the Realize My Success website. I signed up (you have to have a code from your Dr). I am not sure how it works. I'm wondering if my Dr and other team members (dietician, counselor) can access it and keep track of my progress via the website. (As I type this, I realize how silly this sounds and will call them in the morning to see if they do keep track). It seems like a great site, but there doesn't seem to be any feedback. Anyone else have any comments or experience with this site? (It keeps telling me I haven't updated the weight in over 2 weeks. My scale is completely different from the Dr. scale - that's why!). Mary

Hi folks, I'm sure this question is probably answered somewhere in this vast sea of topics. Forgive me if I'm repeating it here. Had my 2nd fill yesterday. Still not sure I'm getting much restriction, but instead of whining about it and using it as an excuse, I've decided it's time to just "act as if" until it kicks in (next fill in 4 weeks). When I go in for a fill, I have a questionaire to fill out. It asks how much Water and Protein I'm getting per day, if I'm snacking between meals and if I'm hungry. Then, when I get my release paperwork on the way out, there is a list - says to get 60 grms. protein, eat 3 meals a day with no Snacks. (Also lists water, but that's not a problem). Here is my questions about this: Is 60 grms of protein a day normal? What does "hungry" mean? No no - I'm not stupid. But if I eat lunch at 12 (say a protein shake), and dinner around 6, I'm getting hungry about 4! I'd consider that pretty normal! I just wonder what the right answer is. For those of you who have found your sweet spot, when you eat until you are full - even if it's 1/2 cup of something - how long does that last you? When are you hungry again? Right now, with little restriction, I'm having a yogurt - then feeling kinda hungry again in a couple of hours. I will check with my dietician later this week, but wonder what you guys do. Thanks in advance! Mary

Exactly what I was thinking! Does it really matter? Mary

Wow - awesome post! Not too wordy. Not too emotional! Just right! It's the encouragement I need. You said "Best of all, I feel normal. Most of you will know what I mean by this. I don't worry about the size and strength of chairs. I don't measure myself against others to see if I am the biggest person in the room. I just...feel...normal. " Powerful words. We ALL have done those things! I believe that when I am comfortable in my own skin, when I know I'm looking good (and I mean "put together", not anything snooty), it completely allows me to be unselfish and concentrate on others! Sometimes when we are going through this battle of the weight, we might feel guilty, like we're doing it out of vanity. Sorry charlie. IMO, it's the exact opposite. And only someone else who's been there can understand how completely self centered and self absorbing it can be to constantly - know matter where you are or what you are doing - be thinking "do they see how much my butt hangs over this chair? (ETC)". I can't wait until I hit that 'normal' feeling! (Of course, I am still 5'10", so I'm most likely always going to be the tallest woman in the room - but I'm ok with that!) Thanks! Mary

Would love to stay in touch. Don't worry - I won't bug you to death. I'm sure we are both busy with life! I went through Riverside Surgical at Lexington Medical Center - Dr. James Givens. How about you?

Hi Gigi, I am still in my first week post op. I finally emailed my dietician this morning and asked if it was normal to be STARVING! I mean, the kind of hunger pains that are just this side of nausea. I have no problem getting my liquids in, including my Protein drinks. Still don't really feel any restriction, but then I don't really know what that feels like and I haven't been pushing the issue (a friend told me "oh - you'll know!"). I told her I had actually 'cheated' and drank a small glass of 1% milk this morning. The hunger pains calmed down some, but within an hour, they were back. She emailed me right away and told me to go ahead and move to phase 2 - full liquids. That meant OATMEAL! WOOHOO! I actually made a packet of SF oatmeal w/extra Water and added a little Protein powder. Had half of it and it was heaven! Here's my point. Stay in CLOSE contact with your team members - your Dr, dietician, counselor. I'm so brand new to all of this, but I know me. They will be imperative to my success. As soon as I start trying to do it all on my own, I'll fall back into bad habits and excuses. I would just encourage you to call your Dr. as soon as possible. So what if you have a moment of :smile2:. It'll pass quick and you'll feel so much better afterwards. Mary

Thanks! Yes, I'm in Sumter. Would love to have a local support group versus driving to Columbia. I think I'll check the Tuomey website to see if they have anything listed on their calendar. Thanks again!

Boxer: It is called "Nectar". It's this giant jug of powder. Mine is Fuzzy Navel flavored. I got mine at The Vitamin Shoppe. I believe you can order it online as well www.thevitaminshoppe.com , I think. It's got 23 grams of Protein per serving, so I make sure I get at least 2 servings a day. (My Nutritionist says at least 40 g. of protein per day). Mary

Today (day 4) has been my toughest day so far. I've been hungry and Sundays are normally our 'anything goes' food day. They had the normal cheesy brats (sausage) for lunch. Daughter went to a baby shower and brought home a left-over plate for her dad. I opened it and the smell just lit up every alarm in my head! There were some sweet/sour meatballs - I had to stick my finger in that sauce - OMG! It's just been rough. We took a walk tonight and that really seemed to help with the gas pains! I am concerned about tomorrow. Everyone will be gone but me. I'm the only one to keep myself accountable. I just keep saying "it's temporary!". One day at a time! I love what Renita said: That's exactly how it's been for me! I fought my insurance company for a year! Then, when I got the green light, the scheduled my surgery for 2 weeks later! It's like I blinked and I was on the other side! I'm still in awe that it actually happened! Mary

Support Group in Sumter?? If they are still active, please let me know when and where! Mary

Love this thread! So many good ideas and encouragement! Now, if we could all just find someone's living room and lay around for a little while together! :eek: My surgery was 10/8 and I'm dragging. I have moments of 'let's go!", followed shortly by "can I sit down?". Got up to go to church this morning and had serious low blood sugar shakes. Mixed up my nectar Protein shake, adding 8 oz Water and about 4 oz apple juice and drank half of it before leaving. I was still shaking by the time we got to church, but having a cup of green tea with a shot of honey seemed to help alot! I still don't have much energy, but at least the shakes are gone. My Dr. has me on Clear Liquids for 1 week, then full liquids for 2 weeks. I think that includes thin oatmeal, yogurt, cream soups, etc. That is followed by 3 weeks of not-so-soft foods - anything you can cut with a fork. Gosh - who would have thought that the idea of some runny oatmeal would be so appealing! Hang in there! This too shall pass (kinda like the gurgling gas in my tummy)!:crying: Mary

Ok - and what exactly is a productive burp? LOL This is so funny! I'm only 4 days post-op and it seems like everytime I take a sip of anything, I get the burps. Somehow, I don't think that's the same thing as a PB! :crying: Mary

Bikini, Its later in the day since you posted this. How are you doing now? Better, I hope! I am thinking about you and hope you will let us know how you are doing! Mary

Mine knows my weight. I have been blessed with a guy who, after 25 years, loves every inch of me, no matter what size I am. He was so cute the day of surgery. We were leaving the house and he leaned over and kissed me on the top of my head. He said "change whatever you want -just don't change your smell!" Wierd, I know - but I get it!