NewOutlook

First off there have been actual studies done that show that fat people get promoted less and in general get paid less then their thin counterparts. Personally I can tell you that I am a naturally outgoing and smiley person. I just smile at people for the heck of it and it seems to get a good reaction. I only shop at Women's clothing stores because I am a size 24, down from a size 26, and heading downward so I don't deal with that issue. I can tell you one thing though from past experience when I was younger and both fat and then thin that fat women are not even looked at by men unless it is to yell out their car windows letting you know that you are fat. As if you didn't already know this. When I was younger and fat I had no boyfriends and no dates. When I lost weight and got down to a size 10. I was suddenly innundated with dates. Men I had worked with for over a year suddenly started flirting with me and asking me out. I was miss popularity. One even admitted to me that it was because I had lost weight. As soon as I gained the weight back I was single again. On another note I have noticed something else that I find hilarious. I have a friend who is normal size and very pretty. She ia s sweety and doesn't mean any harm but ever since I got banded she has been trying to feed me every time I go over to her house. She keeps asking me if I want something to eat. She is so funny. She doesn't even realize what she is doing but I can see it. She is worried that I will lose weight and become competition. When ever we go out she is the one who gets all the looks from guys and she eats it up. If I lose too much weight she will not be the only one and subconsiously I think she has realized it. So she is trying to feed me and keep me fat. I love her to death, but I just say no when she tries to feed me. I will never be true competition for her nor do I want to. But I will get down to my goal weight and I will get some men looking. That she will just have to deal with.

I think I understand what you are talking about. I have a problem, not when I am not eating and sometimes decide I am hungry and want to eat. That is not the problem. For that I just chew a piece of gum and it solves the "my mouth needs to be busy" syndrome. My problem is when I am eating something I really like. I just have to have one more bite. The only thing that has saved me is that I usually end up throwing it back up. That is a nasty little lesson. I can't say I am totally cured yet but lets just say that I do it a lot less often now. And drinking doesn't do it for me. That just makes me bring it back up faster. So I never drink while I am eating anymore. It's a hard lesson, but I have learned that they are all hard lessons; eating too fast, one more bite, not drinking while eating, trying to eat something I know I shouldn't, like McDonald's fries. I tried that one 3 times and all three times ended up running to the bathroom before I finally gave them up. All I can say is I feel your pain. It is a long hard road and nothing gets solved overnight. Just take it one day at a time, try different things that may help you. Take a portion on your plate up front and put the rest away in the fridge, or if eating out ask for a to go box up front and put half in the to go box and close it for later. Try destroying the food after your last satisfying bite so it isn't edible anymore, like blow your nose in your napkin and then put it on top of the food on your plate. Anything that works for you. Once you get that one down and can get the will power to stand not taking that last bite write again and let us know what you learned to do. Maybe it will help everyone else here who hasn't beaten that demon yet. :cursing:

I PB a lot. I did today over breakfast. I was running out of the house because I was late getting up and was eating my muffin on the run. It was so good and I was so hungry that I ate it too quick and as soon as I got to work I had to PB. Then I tried again to eat it later and I ate just one too many bites and back to the bathroom. I had my lapbanding in September and have had to overcome some really lousy eating habits. But as I do I have been able to get through longer and longer times without PBing. It just means that I still have lessons to learn I guess. I go in for my second fill in a week and hate to have to admit all this to my doctor but I know it will not be anything he hasn't already heard. http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/t/w1mbpGO/weight.png"></A< a>>

momof2. I hear how hard this is for you. People look at the lapband as a cure all, a miracle. Just get the lapband and it will do all the work for you. It is so dissapointing when you test it and find that you are can eat all the things you used to eat. That if you push it you can still eat quite a bit. That the lapband won't make you change your habits of a lifetime or get you off the couch to exercise. I avoided getting lapbanded for years because I felt that eating was my last fun thing. I am a divorced mom of 2 who has raised them alone for 10 years now. I had to give up everything to do this and I felt like eating was my last outlet. But finally when I was almost 300 lbs I realized that if I didn't do something quick I was going to tip over the 300 lb mark I decided it was time. My last joy was going to kill me. The truth was my real joy will be walking my daughter down the aisle when she gets married, watching my son graduate from law school, playing with my grandkids. Those are the joys I was not going to experience if I kept eating the way I was. So I made the decision and started my journey down the lapband road. On September 8th I had my lapbanding surgery. Because my doctor put me on a liquid protein diet 2 weeks prior to surgery I was already down 14 lbs by the time I went in. That was a motivator right there. I had my first fill almost 3 weeks ago and it was rough. I was back on liquids and mushies for a week. When I could finally eat again everything solid got stuck and I was pbing every single day. But finally a few days ago I was able to eat regularly again. I hate to exercise but I walk almost every day at work for 20-25 minutes with friends. We talk and the time flies. I stay away from candy, cake and ice cream. I don't drink my beloved Diet Coke anymore. I eat really slowly. Because I eat so slowly I am full after only 6-8 bites. When I order food at a restaurant I ask for a box when I order and insist they bring it with the food. I immediately cut my portion in half and stick half in the box before I start eating so i won't even be tempted to overeat. Usually I end up putting even more in the box after I am done eating and one meal lasts me 3 days. I drink and drink and drink water, water, water. It is working. I am losing weight. Slowly but surely it is coming off. I have a set back now and then and put a lb or 2 back on when I just have to have something salty but it comes right back off in a day or two. Here are tips that will get you going: 1. Drink lots of water. Flavor it with Cyrstal Light if you need to but get it in. At least 40 ounces a day. 2. Get a friend to walk with and walk. Start with 10-15 minutes a day at the mall or somewhere and go for it. You will have so much fun talking you won't notice the time go by. 3. Chew, chew, chew. 20 times for each bite and wait at least 1-1/2 minutes between bites. That will help you know when you are getting full before it is too late and you are stuffed to discomfort. 4. Ask for a box when your food is brought and cut half your portion and put it right into the box and close the lid. Lunch for tomorrow. 5. Make a list of at least 5 small goals and the rewards you will give yourself when you get there. Lose 10 lbs go see a movie. Lose 20 lbs, buy a new outfit, etc.... 6. Come to this or another site every day and read about how everyone else is doing. I guarantee they are having the same problems you are and it will make you feel better to not be so alone. 7. Buy at least 2 things each week at the store that are low fat or low sugar to replace something you love. IE: Frozen Yogurt or sugar free ice cream or popscicles to replace fatty ice cream. Promise margerine to replace regular. You get the idea. 8. Love and forgive yourself for the past and move on. Wallowing won't solve the problem. Doing something good for your body will. 9. Last but not least remember the lapband is only a tool. If you don't make the hard choices and follow through you will still be where you were before the surgery only with scars on your stomach. 10. Remember we are here and we care. We will always listen and support you. Good luck on your journey. You can do it. Newoutlook 40lbs down and 60 to go

Hi. I just had my first fill yesterday. I am seven weeks out from surgery and all is well. My first fill was a little tough though but going okay now. My doctor did 4ccs at first in my fill. He hit the port on the first try by just having me lay flat and then do a parial sit up. I was suprised he wanted to put so much in the first time but he is the expert. Anyway after the fill he gave me a cup of water and asked me to slowly drink it and left the room. I took 3-4 sips and it got stuck. The nurse came back in to check and I told her what happened. She gave it some time to go down but it didn't. Finally after about 20 minutes and it hadn't gone down my doctor came back and took out 1cc. So my total first fill was 3ccs. The rest of yesterday I spent on clear liquids. Today I am back on protein shakes and cream soups. Tomorrow mushy food, etc... So far so good. So don't worry about the fill. It will go fine. Just make sure to drink some water before you leave his office to make sure everything goes down okay. Good luck and keep up the good work.

Hi. I applaud you for thinking about lapband surgery. I am approximately 4 weeks out from surgery. I thought about this surgery and discarded the idea for years before I finally buckled down and did it. I kept saying "but my only vice left is eating. I love to eat". Well I ate my way up to almost 300 lbs. So finally it was time to realize that I was not going to be able to get it off with Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig or any other way. I went to a seminar about lap band surgery and liked what I heard. My insurance covered it at 80% and I had it done. I have already lost 36 lbs and now that I am back to eating solids I am losing weight at about 1-2 lbs a week. I have talked to many, many people who have had lapband surgery or know someone who had it and I have heard only good things. I would definately do it again. I am not saying that lapband surgery is going to solve all your problems. It is just a tool. You have to change your eating habits or it won't work. But the band forces you to change your eating habits. No more shoveling food in as fast as I can. No more taking large bites. No more eating anything and everything. No more carbonated beverages. No more sugary sweet stuff. Or at least not much and not for a while. I now take very small bites and chew, chew, chew. I now drink water, water and more water. I now put my fork down between bites so that I don't put too much in and plug my band (ow does that hurt). I am now walking 15 minutes a day 3-4 days a week to start. My cholesterol dropped almost 50 pts in a matter of weeks. My health is better. I can reach my toes again. I look forward to the weeks and months ahead and watching my body change. When was the last time you could say that? Yes. I am a believer and a convert. My vote is yes. If you have tried other methods and they have failed and you are truly tired of being 100 lbs overweight or more then yes. Go for it and enjoy your new life.