Sugar1

Thanks Di... yes, I did speak with my lawyer. We actually have a 4-way meeting tomorrow to hash things out (should be fun) and we will advise my future ex and his lawyer that I will be moving out with the children on February 1st... By then we will have a separation agreement signed (I hope!!!)... I work for lawyers so I have an idea of what kind of things can happen, but I didn't think he would be so low as to tell me I have to take the kids and leave the house that they have been living in for 13 years of their lives... but that's okay, I hope he and his father rot in hell!!! Yvonne

Hi all... I haven't been on LBT since late November, so I don't know if anyone remembers me. Things have been a little crazy for me on the road to singledom. My separation from my husband has taken a nasty turn. He refuses to leave the house and, so I have decided to take the step. I was avoiding leaving since we have 2 12-year old children and didn't want to take them from their home, but the stress is affecting my health now. For the past month I have not been able to eat anything without throwing it up. I don't know if this happens to you guys, but stress tightens my band. I have been living on coffee, cigarettes, and soft mushy foods, but only when I am not home. If I am home, I can't even drink water... it just comes back up. Whenever I eat or drink anything, I can hear gurgling (sounds like hunger pangs) which makes me believe that my band is really tight. Anyone have any ideas on this? I spoke to my internist about possibly giving me something for the stress and anxiety (and yes, I am having anxiety attacks from worrying about money and legal fees) but I was told that the "anti-depressives" could possibly make you gain weight (so I am definitely not taking those). My blood pressure which was finally normal after many years has been creeping up again (although thankfully the weight has not crept up -- yet). I feel like I am in turmoil and if I don't get out of the situation, I am going to end up hospitalized. As for me, I cannot wait to be single again, free from the control of HIM!!! I am signing a lease for an apartment tonight (not really big enough for the 3 of us, but it will do for now) and we move in as of February 1st. I hope I make it until then... Hope I didn't bore you guys, but just wanted to catch up. Thanks for "listening"... Yvonne

Finally able to post here... 103 lbs down... 38 to go!!!

Way to go JC on your date and I am so happy for you that you didn't lose your band. Manatee... that woman was just so rude and ignorant. The nerve of some people.

Wow Manatee... you look awesome. I would definitely use that pic in your profile. Great smile!!!

JC -- what happened at the doc????? Yvonne

JC... cool new toy... do you like it? I have been thinking about getting the Envy but my contract isn't up until March so I have to wait until then... I do a lot of texting and want a phone that makes it easier to do... but for now, I am stuck with your run of the mill cell... Yvonne

Apple... I think I will hop on the eliptical tonite... my daughter is sleeping at a friend's house and not there to keep me busy... thanks for the idea... I will make sure the Ipod is charged and ready to go!!! Yvonne

JC sounds like your small weight gain is actually muscle... it must be with all the exercise you are doing... Yvonne

Tonia... good luck with the surgery on Friday. Yvonne

Hi all... been away for a few days. It was so relaxing not being home cause my husband hasn't left yet. I don't know what he is waiting for, all I know, is it is very uncomfortable with him there... we don't talk unless it has to do with the kids... I did notice that he took his wedding ring off... mine has been off for weeks now. He is home all the time so I don't know if he has actually looked for a place to live yet and the kids are asking me all the time when he is leaving... my answer is the truth, I don't know. I've thought about asking him, but.... question to you guys... we live in his father's house... how do I go about asking him when he is leaving??? It is a sticky situation, but I'm confused and so are my kids... arghhh... I just want this over with and move on ... I have been speaking with a lawyer friend of mine and she said that as soon as he moves out I should immediately get a separation agreement in place which I plan on doing, but HE HAS NOT GONE ANYWHERE YET!!!!! Anyway, we had a great time in Six Flags... I went on 1 of the roller coasters (Batman) and I actually fit in the seats... that was a great feeling that I could do that with my kids... although getting off the ride was not a great feeling... I was so dizzy and had spaghetti legs... oh, well, the experience was great though... now it's time to get the kids ready for school next week. Thank goodness all the running around starts again (more time out of the house). I started walking again with my daughter ... 4 miles a night which is good for me... I am walking again tonight and I feel better when I do it. Now I just need to hop on the eliptical machine that's sitting in my living room gathering dust... Yvonne

JC did the doc talk to you about replacing the band after you have healed, especially since you are so near goal? Would you even do it? Yvonne

<p>Hey JC... I see the insomnia is still hounding you... you posted this morning at 4:19 a.m.... have you been able to sleep any better? And how's the hamstring? Your strength and determination is so inspirational. I hope that some day I have the same strength and determination... right now I don't feel like doing anything and have been stress eating... I haven't gained anything, but I'm scared I will start to gain... grrrrrrr</p> <p> </p> <p>Yvonne</p> <p> </p> <p></p>

Hey guys... I haven't been around in a few days... guess I've been feeling VERY stressed out. My kids are away this week at a friend's house and I have been home with my husband and it's been quite strained. Yes, he still has not moved out... I am not sure what he is waiting for. I don't even know if he has been looking for a place, cause he is ALWAYS home. I was out with some friends on Monday night, so that was good, but I was home from 6 p.m. last night and it was so stressful. I think this stress has caused a muscle spasm in my neck and I have not been able to move my neck or shoulders for 2 days... I wish he would move out already. I have noticed that mail (you know, banking mail) has been missing for a few weeks, so I am going to take a 1/2 day from work on Friday and see if I can find anything in the house... when he is home, I can't go near the desk as he starts to freak out... I hate having my life in limbo. I am the type of person who is a planner and I like to have things orderly, and right now, my life is chaos. I am going away this weekend with a friend and her kids and my kids and hopefully I will be able to de-stress, although with 7 kids don't know if that will happen, but at least I will be away from HIM!!!!! That's one thing through our 18 years of marriage that I have always complained about and it's that he is smothering, he's always around... has no friends, doesn't socialize... what a FREAK... I have no idea why I married him... I just wish I had the support of my family for the split. My mother is so angry with me and blaming me for all our troubles and saying I am doing a terrible thing to my kids. Funny, but she split from my father when I was 8 and married a violent drunk a year later... can you say pot calling the kettle black??? Sorry for the ranting.... Yvonne

Kristi, wow, you look amazing. Totally different. Manatee... you look great!!! Keep it up. I am sure you will be able to start deal with dating soon... I am not ready to post my pics yet. I have ugly duckling syndrome.... Yvonne

April, do you like slimfast? I use the chocolate Royale for lunch and I make a shake out of it with ice in a blender and it's yummy and fills me up...I also find that Special K bars keep me pretty full too and they are only 90 calories. I actually look forward to the slimfast for lunch, especially when I put it in a blender. Good luck and stay focused. Don't get discouraged. Yvonne

JC, great pics of you and buddy.... he's so cute, I just love dogs. Love my little Yorkie, she's so funny, makes me laugh so much. Yvonne

Crispy, JC you guys look amazing. Crispy, I too wear a 14/16 on top and 18 on the bottom and you look way smaller than I do... way to go girl! April, thanks for the welcome and congrats on moving up your doc date and the weight loss. You can definitely do it... are you on a liquid diet? I was on Optifast before my WLS and lost 16 lbs in 12 days... what type of diet are you doing? Yvonne

Oh, yeah, Diane, he is too much a coward to talk to the kids with me. I told him that they overheard us and overheard him say he was moving out and t hat we should talk to them together because they have questions. His response was "they can ask me whatever questions they want, but there's no reason to sit down with them now." So, it's left up to me. Yvonne

Diane -- I have a boy and a girl. They are actually both fine with the separation, however, they are confused because he has not moved out yet. I don't even see that he has begun looking for an apartment yet. I am going to have a talk with him this weekend and tell him that since the kids know he is moving out, he has to do it soon because it is confusing them. Other than that, they are fine. Since I work for lawyers they know that by law he has to support them and we don't have to move away from our home. Thanks for your prayers and I will keep you guys posted. Yvonne

Hey Crispy, thanks for the welcome, I already feel like I made friends on this thread. JC when is your next doc appt? I hope all goes well, keep us posted. Yvonne

Losingjusme... wanna be my date... I am trying to arrange availability to go, would love to meet you all... keep me posted... my e-mail is yconigliaro@aol.com. I'd love to help if I can... let me know Yvonne

Denise, thanks for the welcome. I already feel like you all are my friends. Yvonne

JC, Shannon & Derby, thank you guys for (1) making me feel welcome to the thread and (2) for your support. I am sure I will be looking to you guys for continued support. Between you guys and my friends here at home, I am sure I will get through this phase of my life. Right now though, I feel like a loser and like the 25 years with my husband were all a lie since he has told me that our marriage has been s&@t from the beginning... Thank goodness for my 2 wonderful kids who have supported me and have told me that they support and love me. Unfortunately, their relationship with their dad is strained, and of course, I am getting the blame for that from certain family members and from him. I'm just really tired of being shot down and blamed for everything wrong in his life. Anyway, thanks guys and I'll be "talking" to you. By the way, JC, I wish I had the energy you have.... I've just taken up walking 3 miles a few nights a week which started out to be not for me, but for my daughter who is a dancer and was told by her teacher in order for her to move to the next level must lose some weight and the walking was to help her, but I feel better (you are 100% right about exercise) doing it. It feels like an accomplishment. Anyway, gotta start working now... Yvonne

Hi All... I am new to this thread. I have been married for 18 years and have been with my husband for 25 years. Our marriage has basically been over for the past 12 years but because we have 2 kids, we have tried to work it out to no avail. We decided this past Sunday to separate and he will be moving out... when I have no idea since I don't think he has looked for an apartment. I have been with him since I am 19, so I didn't have much dating experience except for one long term boyfriend before him. The prospect of me having to date at some point in the future is VERY SCARY, given the fact that I was banded a little over a year ago, have lost 90 lbs so far with about 50 to go. I don't think after he leaves I will be able to have the tummy tuck, my arms and legs done, so I am having this fear of being alone for the rest of my life because no one will want me with all this excess loose skin. Even though I have lost 90 lbs, I still don't think I look good... how do I get past this and are there guys out there (I'm 43) willing to look past the body image, or am I destined to be alone....??? Yvonne