BlueParis

Hi all! I'm finally on vaccation and wrapped up my job! It has been a hectic month to say the least, My feet barely touched the ground! I'll check in tomorrow and am looking forward to taking the time to read all of your updates....

Ive made it to my cute little music festival in the Loire valley. And I really feel happy and at peace for the first time in a long time while being around a lot of new people - I’m not ashamed of my body or of how I move. And I also realised that I’m happy grazing little bits of food and sitting down for a meal with people and not feeling the need to stuff myself but also not feeling like I’m missing out. I wanted to share this with you folks because the last few months have been quite (very) tough at times and you’ve been my sounding board and holding me up. I know my journey is far from over and that the road ahead is a long and winding one, but… I have no doubts that I made the right choice for me. How’s everyone getting on ?

Hi all! Sorry I've been in a whirlwind (I'm not sure thats how you say that in english...) of work for the last few days. The political situation in France is very unstable and unsettling right now and because I work with public funding it's been more than crazy. I'm in Canada but am having to unexpectingly having to fly back to France early later today ( was meant to be in the US next week) to be able to hit the floor running if **** hits the fan with the election results Sunday. That said... I am proud of myself because I put my foot down and will not work through the weekend. I'm going to a music festival in the loire valley instead and will dance and be merry. Happy belated birthday @LisaCaryl! I hope this next trip round the sun is a good one and that by the end of it you are where you want to be. @NickelChip I'm happy your holidays went well and applaud you making good choices when away from home. I've got to the point where I'm loosing very slowly ( 5 pounds in 6 weeks) and so am just trying to make the best choices I can without over thinking things. I've finally dropped to 67.5kg (148.8lbs) (BMI 23.9) and have accepted things are going to be slow from now on .... I have three weeks of hectic work left before I'm on holiday for 5 whole weeks before starting my new job in September. Once I'm on holiday I'm going to try and up my steps and focus on eating the best I can( and drinking less alcohol) and I'll see where that gets me. @RonHall908 Like every true Parisian I know .... I leave Paris 48 hours before the games start! I'll be away on holiday for 5 whole weeks with my partner. The longest holidays we have ever taken. The games are going to be hectic and access to a lot of areas in the city are restricted - most of the bridges are also closed ... so we're just leaving the city... like every sane person I know! That said... in France we get 5 weeks of paid holiday a year plus 1 extra week if we work over 35 hours a week (my case) plus 11 bank holidays plus basically unlimited paid sick leave plus like an extra day when you move houses, 3 days for a wedding, 3 days for the death of a parent, 2 weeks for the death of a child, 6 months full pay maternity, up to 5 days a year full pay for sick children under 14 etc etc etc ... so we only use holiday days for holidays so every summer ( office working ) Parisians tend to leave paris en masse for most of August - we all joke that the 15th of August Paris is empty every year ... so this isn't so specific to the olympics! I did go for a walk in Versailles not long ago and saw the prep for the horse racing ... it's going to look so so cool with the chateau as a backdrop!

I just want to +++ this re vaginal estrogen cream for UTI prevention @kristieshannon your comment made me think of https://x.com/mvankuikenmd on twitter who I love !

@Noelle74 How's work? I'm about to leave Paris again for 3 weeks and head into a crazy tunnel of meetings and flights and travel and conferences till the end of July ... I've finally dropped to under 69kg but now know that my weightloss is probably going to slow to 5-7ish pounds (2/3kg a month) so I have a long slog in front of me and If I reach my goal it won't be until December I reckon. I'm not sure how I feel about this. I'm trying to look at the progress I've made so far and concentrate on the fact that although my BMI is at the top of healthy it is healthy. Looking back at pictures is helping. My collar bones and hip bones are starting to make a reappearance at last and that I'm happy about. I've decided I also probably need to seriously act on my drinking too and will count my units this next month and consider seeing a shrink if I'm averaging over 14 units a week. By the way how are everyones scars ... mine are still so dark - see last picture! One Week Post op Two weeks post op One month ish post op Last week (so 4 months post op) This evening (not the best outfit but I'm in Pjs already - folded top in and up to show scars)

@Noelle74 Good luck with the job! @gracesmommy2 I'm still stalled ( nearly 6 weeks now!) so you have all my sympathy @NickelChip I hope you enjoy your holidays! @LisaCaryl I hope your knee continues to behave @RonHall908 Thanks for the podcast recommandations, enjoying them ! I'm going to give my week another stall and then do a one week liquid diet I think...

I hope everyone had a lovely weekend. Thank you all for your messages re my stall! I'm still stalled ... no suprise there. I'm going to try and track what I'm eating this week as I haven't really been tracking at all. Just trying to be sensible and go with the flow. I'm still being very conciencious about everything I put in my mouth and reckon I'm averaging about 1200-1300 calories a day max. I know I could eat more protein but as I eat so little meat its a bit complicated esp when I'm travelling. I hate protein shakes and anything with an artificial taste, I'm really not into processed foods. I do love carbs. I know what I'm eating is far from perfect but I'm also trying to "live" as normally as I can without getting ultra focused on food because 1) I just don't want to 2) I know that it won't be substainable for me to track/only eat specific things/100% certain avoid things long term 3) food is a real source of joy for me as is cooking. Cooking is my way of calming down and disconecting my brain after work but I'm an improvisation whats left on the fridge cook not a planning cook 4) I've very scared of being too "strict" on food and ending up with a transfer addiction as I have a very addition prone personality and I already smoke (cigarettes daily and weed probably 2/3 times a month) and drink (much much less than before the surgery when I was drinking too much) and even though I haven't touched a Benzodiazepine (xanax) in 3 years and 8 months (go me 😌) I had a big enough issue with benzo abuse to have to take a month of work to come off them. I'll try and track properly tomorrow and for a few days but for example today from memory I had ( I also had water) Breakfast : 1/4 bagel with butter, coffee with semi skim milk Mid Morning : 2x Coffee with semi skim milk Lunch : Palm sized bit of omelette with courgette, red peppers, kale, onions, cheese, about two tablespoons grated carrot salad Mid afternoon : Tea with semi skim milk and sweetener, bit of brie cheese about twice the size of my thumb Supper : Palm sized bit of omelette with courgette, red peppers, kale, onions, cheese Herbal tea Before bed : About 4/5 teaspoons of vegan pannacotta (soy milk, sweetener, orange flower water, cornstarch, pistachios, maple syrup) Herbal tea

Got home. Got naked. Stepped on scales. Back at 70.4kg. So up 1 kg (2.2lbs) since last Friday .One full month of being stalled today. Starting to get very very very fed up. No way am I consuming over 1000 calories a day even counting every drop I drink, every splash of milk I put in a coffee. So p*ssed off at still seeing a 7 on the scales. Doing my head in. Going to have a nap and reflect.

I’ll get back to everyone properly later - it’s 8.30am here and I’ve just landed in Paris after a very very early start… just wanted to share this - cattle class on Air France.

So I studied in Berlin for 2 years - when I left Paris I was a size 34… and as the years went by I was still a size 34 in Berlin… and then I got back to Paris and realised I’d gained a size … insidious indeed! But yes, French women and esp Parisienne women tend to be pretty small! The average BMI for a French woman between 30 and 50 years old is 23.2 and for a Parisienne woman between 30-50 years old it’s 21.1! I’m still the fattest woman in my office and friend group by quite a bit - I think (but I’m not sure) that weight is also highly correlated to level of education here and I work in an office with 95% of PhDs … that might explain it..: that or the fact that black expresso and a cigarette is considered breakfast (also guilty of this). It’s hard because you have to « enjoy » food and the wine and the cheese and the pâtisseries at social occasions but you’re also judged very severely for being even the tiniest bit overweight - so basically you have to starve in private. Things are slowly changing but up until about 5 years ago it was basically mission impossible to find any clothes over size 42 ( American size 10) on the high street. Fat people (esp fat women) are despised. I was treated so badly when I was fatter, with so much disdain, so much rudeness, so much disregard. In French public space women’s bodies exist to be desirable and desired. To put it crudely if you don’t look « fu**able » enough you’re not welcome in public spaces… ( also see parralel with female headscarves being forbidden in public spaces and even wetsuits for women being forbidden on some public beaches ( must be swimsuit or bikini) because wetsuits were seen as Islamic propaganda)… In France women’s bodies belong to the male gaze. It’s a complicated issue.

@LisaCaryl How's your knee? Did you see a doc at the clinic? Re wardrobe, I had a clear out and gave a lot of things to my cleaning lady and have just been going down to my cellar to get old clothes out. I have bought a few new dresses, but I but far too many clothes anyway... I'm a french size 38/40 now and hope to be a 36 by the end of the summer which will allow me to fit into most of my old clothes .... but unfortunately not my fave dress which is a 34.... that still seems like pipe dream right now. My posture is getting better and I have less pain in my legs which is nice. 2 days until I'm back home and can weight myself to see if I've broken my stall.

I like crispy tofu in the airfryer. Block of Tofu/Cornflour/Spices/Oil Spray/Salt/Pepper You need firm tofu. A couple of hours before you want to eat take the tofu out of the package and blot it dry, then stack a couple of sheets of kitchen paper above and below it (or clean tea towels) then put a plate with a weight on top of it for 5-10 minutes. In a big bowl add a a big tablespoon of cornflour and the spices/seasonings of your choice for example garlic powder/paprika/liquid smoke/dried lime rind Herbes de provence/ lemon zest and juice/ground bay Cumin/Tumeric/dried corriander Soy sauce/sesame oil/garlic/ginger MSG/orange juice and zest/maple syrup/clove powder/cinnamon/chilli/onion powder Mix your cornflour with your spices and seasonings until well mixed or if you have liquids in your seasonings until its a smoothish paste Wipe the tofu dry again and cut into cubes, tip the cubed tofu into the bowl with the cornflour and seasoning mix and shake the bowl vigorously until the tofu is covered in the seasoning mix. If some of the tofu breaks into crumbs this is not a problem. They will just be extra crispy crumbs! It's best to let the tofu marinade for at least 15 minutes to a few hours but I often skip this part because I don't have time. When you're ready to eat preheat your air fryer to 200°c/400°f. Open the airfryer drawer and spray with oil, tip the tofu in and give it a spray. Shake after about 7-8 minutes and then put back in for another 7-8 minutes of until crispy. Enjoy! You'll find a lot of youtube/internet recipes that are probably easy to follow then mine if you google "airfryer tofu". It's nice as a protein without feeling too "woodstock crunchy vegan"

Congrats on the mega stall break! I don't know if you can get kale where you are ... I promise this is so much better than it sounds it's like crack health food. I was like a bit bleh when i heard about it ... But air fryer kale chips. A lot of Kale, salt, oil Wash kale, take out the big middle stalks, put in a big bowl with some salt and a tablespoon of oil and massage. Put in preheated airfryer at 400F for 3 minutes, shake, back in for 3 minutes. Delicious. Will catch up properly later!

I went to turkey. Paid around 3.5k all in. Aftercare is through whatsapp and calls. It was okay for me and they are pretty reactive (get back to me with in a day) on any questions I ask. They send lists of blood tests to do every once in a while. I'm 4 months out.

Welcome @Dchonlee ! It's going to be an amazing journey I'm sure. Keep us posted on how things go.