NickelChip

100% this! I bought a lot of bariatric versions of things that I think helped me mentally before surgery, because feeling like I was preparing made me less anxious, but that I truly did not need. This includes portion plates and special containers, not to mention way too much protein powder and things like jello packets I've barely touched 5 months out.

It's great that your body is starting to regulate! But also... periods, boo! I started using the Mirena IUD after my youngest was born, so going on 13 years of no periods (although not everyone has that luck with it). However, the last couple months, I have had noticeable spotting that lasted several days, and also the tenderness in my breasts that I always had with my period. So definitely there's something changing for me, too, with weight loss, even though it's being masked a bit more because of the birth control. I was starting to wonder, since I'm 50 now, if maybe I was done (hard to know if you've hit menopause with Mirena) but this seems to have answered that question, anyway.

After having my surgery cancelled last month due to the abrupt closure of my hospital's bariatric practice, I have a new date at another hospital in the area and can hardly wait for the time to fly by. I'm scheduled for gastric bypass on February 21. Any other February peeps out there?

The curls are gorgeous! That's a really nice length and style to frame your face, very flattering.

I'm right at 5 months, and over the past few weeks, it has become HARD. In the beginning, I was dropping weight, had zero interest in food, and was totally motivated. But since the beginning of July, I've lost a pound. Actually, I've lost and gained and lost and gained that one pound multiple times. I've started feeling hungry sometimes again, and that's triggering all sorts of bad behaviors like getting up when I'm trying to avoid work (I work from home) and looking in the cupboard for a snack, not to mention craving sweets. It's been a constant fight. Not getting that reward of watching the scale dropping all the time kind of saps the motivation, I think. And the novelty wears off and you start to realize that you're in this for the long haul and maybe you start to rebel a little. You're not alone. You say you're afraid of being judged, but you are judging yourself every time you do things you know you shouldn't do. You said it yourself. You're disgusted by what you're doing, but there's a reason you're doing it, and figuring that out is going to be the key to stopping it and changing. I feel like there is probably a voice you hear in the back of your head telling you that you can't do this. Maybe there's literally someone saying it to you in your life, but most likely it's a voice in your head from a long time ago, one that sounds like you but probably was someone else when you first heard it. For me, it's my grandmother, and to some extent my dad. Never happy, never praising. Expecting perfection and scolding "for your own good" over every little thing. Ridiculing my weight despite being overweight themselves, but also overfeeding me because that's what they knew. Food was the enemy, but also a reward from emotionally stunted caregivers who had no other way to show affection. When you can never fully meet expectations at a young age, you learn quickly that you will always fail. That may be the role you've played in your family. Maybe it's everything, or maybe just one thing, like being overweight. And when you start to succeed, it feels frightening because it challenges everything you have been taught to believe about yourself. If you're not "the fat friend", who are you? Or maybe being "the fat daughter" kept a jealous family member happy because you weren't "competition" that way. There are so many reasons we get into these patterns. But the point is, the patterns feel normal and safe. So you make sure you don't succeed and change too much or for too long. You're used to being disappointing to yourself. You can live with that. But admitting you're capable of succeeding and changing is really scary. Allowing yourself to challenge the roles other people want you to fulfill is the hardest thing you can do. At least that's my experience. As for how to change, my first suggestion is talk to your team. That's why they're there, and they know what's going on because they've seen it before. Face it head on. Nothing they say is going to be any worse than what you are saying, and doing, to yourself. If you can get set up with a therapist, even better. Second, get every source of temptation out of the house. The alcohol. The junk food. Whatever is making you stumble, get rid of it. Do your shopping online from now on, or curbside pickup because it is way easier not to give into temptation that way. You can't binge on what you don't have. But skip the gym. It's really only about 10% of your success, anyway. Focus on water, protein, and vitamins. You don't need the false guilt of the gym to make everything worse. And third, get help from people you trust who are close to you if you can. Accountability is key. If going out to eat is an issue, tell your friends or family that you need their help not letting you go out to eat. Explain why you can't be around snacks, or why you won't be ordering alcohol, and ask for their help. If you trust even one person in your life to tell what is really going on, tell them. You need another voice cheering you on instead of just your own head bringing you down. Bottom line, something about what you are doing right now feels comfortable to you. It's a pattern that you can live with, even if you hate it. Something about what you were doing when you were following the rules was making you uncomfortable. Figure out what and why. You can't change your habits until you change that voice in your head, and until you can love yourself and cheer yourself on instead of being your own worst judge. But you have to believe you're worth it and be willing to do things that scare you in order to get past this fog and get to where you want to be.

This is me right now, too. I am looking at vast quantities of things like family packs of chicken breast and feeling like any one thing could feed me for a year. What I'm planning to do soon is come up with meals I can make with as much of the raw ingredients I have on hand as possible, including various dinners, soups, stews, etc. I'll set aside a day or two to do all my prep and cooking, and then freeze everything in single serving portions. Once it's sorted into meals I can heat and eat instead of 3lb flats of plastic wrapped poultry, I'm hoping it won't be so intimidating!

For me, the pain wasn't bad. I needed liquid Tylenol for the first 3 days, a few times per day (tip: look for the ADULT formula because the child formula tastes horrible and is thicker, like gel). I had one incision that would give twinges for about a week, but it passed quickly. I did not experience gas pain. I found a weighted heating pad on my abdomen at night was very soothing. I was very tired and found it difficult to focus. If possible, don't tax yourself.I walked frequently, but not far. So I was moving around but not logging a huge number of steps. By week 3, I felt relatively normal. By the end of month 2, I was pretty much back to my old self with the bonus of quite a bit more energy, and I could navigate eating in restaurants without too much trouble (I went on a weekend trip out of town at around 8 weeks post op).

Hey there, I had gastric bypass but it's basically the same thing for incisions. I suggest something loose and comfy. My surgery was in the winter, so I wore elastic waistband pajama bottoms and a loose top. You may be a bit puffy from IV fluids and surgical gas so expect to feel bloated and not wanting anything tight on your abdomen. If I were choosing an outfit for summertime, I would probably go for a sundress with no waistband or light pajama bottoms and a t-shirt. I actually wore my clothing in and back home because I arrived first thing in the morning and immediately changed into the hospital gown, which I wore until I was discharged, so my arrival clothing was clean. Just brought underwear, socks, and very basic toiletries. You won't need much, but I do suggest chapstick because dry lips is a real problem. Some hand lotion, too. I brought my Kindle and never turned it on.

Officially 5 months post-op today. Here are some progress photos of today compared to two months ago (I missed my 4-month photos because I was on vacation) and to my highest weight, which is almost a year ago. I've been basically stalled for the past 4 weeks with only 2 lbs lost and a lot of bouncing up and down. With vacation, my good habits have slipped a bit. It's too easy to take "just a bite" of this, and also that, and maybe a "taste" of something else... to the point that it adds up way more than I think in a day. And I'm not back in the routine I was in before with walking every day. I have an appointment with my dietician on Tuesday and am hoping to get back on track this week. I still want to lose 25-30lbs so I can't lose focus!

The curly hair looks so good! You should definitely keep it that way, although I understand the frizz and floof issues, especially if you have any humidity. But it looks great!

Oh my gosh, this is really surprising! At my hospital, they took me into a pre-op area about an hour before my scheduled starting time, where I chatted with the surgeon and was introduced to every member of the surgical team, even the medical students. How disconcerting to have a last minute switch you didn't even know about!

I definitely don't think this is a slippery slope because honestly, I loved sweets before surgery and I am still the same person and love sweets now. I just can't/don't want to overindulge in the way I used to, and I find some of the things (cheaper chocolate, for instance) less appealing and not satisfying. My favorite treat (though I will caution that it won't meet strict low-carb targets, but I have not been given those from my program) is to use my Yonana machine to turn frozen fruit into a sorbet-like treat that I can eat alone or top with things like fresh sliced fruit, peanut butter made from plain or chocolate PB2 powder, unsweetened coconut, and homemade granola. I've also found some recipes for high protein acai base for smoothie bowls and am planning to give that a try instead of the frozen fruit on its own. It's basically frozen fruit, Greek yogurt, acai powder, and protein powder that you blend up and can store in the freezer in individual servings until ready to top with all the things above. Also, you don't have to use frozen banana to use the Yonana machine. I've used every type of frozen fruit you can think of with great results as I'm not a huge banana fan.

I'm so glad it helped! It's the same thing I have to keep telling myself all the time.

Yeah, there's a definite bias of information (unintentionally, of course) when you frequent bariatric spaces. I've been on this board almost a year, and I really enjoy it, but at five months post-op, one thing I've noticed is the vast majority of people who were posting regularly a year ago, or even 3-6 months ago, are not here any more. That's a lot of diverse experience that goes away, and I would guess that the people who remain are a combination of those who are the most dedicated (possibly to the extreme), those who get the most out of social interactions, and those who experience the most complications in their journeys, along with people who return after several years to get back on track because of significant regain or needing revisions. The people who are hitting their goals easily, losing weight at an average pace, eating and exercising in a way that isn't particularly noteworthy, maintaining within a reasonable weight range, and generally living life without stressing about bariatric issues, quickly become underrepresented voices. So it's easy to start thinking that the average person struggles a lot at every stage, can barely eat or drink for months, exercises like they're training for the olympics, tracks every bite of food and never strays from their macros every day of their life, experiences all the most severe complications regularly, and will gain back all their weight plus some if they even dare to glance at a piece of bread or a dessert on someone else's plate let alone allow a bite to pass their lips. It's easy to become very obsessive about it (raises hand: yes, that's me). And in a situation like after surgery where a lot of things change at once, sometimes it feels like the more you can control and anticipate, the better. At least it does for me. But my advice would be, especially when you are feeling particularly anxious about something, to think about whether there are perspectives you aren't getting that might reduce your anxieties if you were able to hear from them. Like, if there were 20-30 people who used to post in your surgery month group and now you're down to 4 or 5, what might those other people say if you asked them about the thing that is worrying you? My guess is, if they're not posting anymore, it's usually not because they're suffering in silence.

Dumping is fairly uncommon, like 30% of patients I believe, so odds are in your favor it won't happen to you. I've had my heart race for several minutes from what could probably count as dumping, but that was admittedly after having something very high in refined sugar that I had no business eating in the first place. Fruit has never been an issue in that way, but it can be an issue for me with the skin or texture as my stomach can be very picky about that. I have been sick from a peach with the skin on, as well as from a piece of thawed frozen mango that was a bit tough. But honestly, you just have to give it a try and remember that dumping is something that, while it could be a little unpleasant, isn't really bad enough to be nervous about for the vast majority of people.

I have to admit, I'm also unaware of revisions that can be done with bypass. I was under the impression your options are fairly limited after bypass, though I'm no expert. Reflux after bypass can certainly happen, but it's highly unusual, as is stretching out your pouch to an abnormally large size (aside from the regular increase in capacity that is normal). I would think a visit to your primary care doctor would be your first step, or an appointment with your surgeon's office if that's possible (I know it's been a long time, so maybe that isn't possible). You're going to want to determine if something has gone wrong that can be fixed surgically, or if it's something that medication or lifestyle changes could better address.

Congratulations!

I do have a walking pad! Unfortunately, it's been so hot in my house, I haven't wanted to use it. I only have window units for a/c and the heat and humidity have been in the mid-90s, so it's very hard to keep things cool. But I'm going to go to the mall to go walking tonight, and tomorrow it's supposed to be in the low 60s in the morning.

I would also join a Discord group if there was one! I'm still struggling with consistency since returning from vacation. I had to dive back into work and household stuff immediately and my brain power doesn't seem to stretch as far as food prep and maintaining a schedule. I've been stuck between 186 and 187 for a few weeks now. And since my region has been under a heat advisory since last week, I haven't been getting my walks in at all. I keep waiting for something new to report, but I still feel stuck. I will be taking 5-month photos in a few days, though. I missed my 4-month while on vacation, so I'm extra curious to compare this time to my before photos.

Looking great, and I hope you enjoyed the beach! Last summer, I took my kids to an indoor water park at just around my highest ever weight. I had to buy a new suit because nothing I had fit anymore, and looking back at the pictures, oh my goodness. I even looked uncomfortable. We went again a few weeks ago, and I was 4 months post-op. Let's just say that thankfully, the suit from last year went straight to the giveaway bag, and I had to order a new one because even my "skinny" suit from a few years before was a bit roomy. I ordered two new ones and ended up with one that is perfect and one that was a bit tight, but I'm hoping it will fit me well in a few more months. Such a great feeling, and going on the water slides was so much more fun this time than 60 lbs ago, for sure.

If you're basing your bypass opinions on 20 years ago, it's come a long way! I chose bypass and have been very happy with the choice. Having said that, I am an avid listener of Dr. Weiner's Pound of Cure podcast and videos, and I found these videos so valuable when making my choice. Ultimately, I went with bypass for the more durable weight loss and avoiding GERD. But there are good reasons to make either choice, and these kind of walk you through some of that.

At 2 months, I could hit 700-900 fairly easily most days. Here is an example of what I was having. Ignore the goals as this app syncs with FitBit and insists on updating all your goals based on your exercise. Those are not the ones I set!

I keep a mental tally of protein each day but I haven't been writing it down. However, I have an appointment with my dietician on the 23rd so I think I will write everything down for at least a week before so I can bring it in with me to discuss. I always wear my Fitbit, so I have data for exercise and sleep, but obviously having the nutrition info is important. And it would help with accountability and resisting temptation, too. I haven't tried the cottage cheese flatbread but I've seen the videos and am intrigued!