bitteroldhag

God, I really want to move to Canada. Is there a warm spot there? Or a spot where anyone other than a Californian can afford a house?

Ah, yes, don't you love the bigots? I have never had anyone dare to tell a fat joke to me. I think people know I wouldn't take that well. But I've had thin people criticize other fat people with me. I don't like that and have tendency to tell them I don't like that. But it's okay to tell fat jokes these days. But no one tells them to me!

Use his schnozz when his you-know-what give out? That's classic. I sort of wish I had a husband with a big schnozz. My own schnozz is short and I look like a pig. It's a serious drag. I always wanted to have a hooked nose, but alas. You all are hilarious. It makes me feel much better about being 60 with acne rosacea among other problems. It's currently nearly 2 a.m. and I'm sitting up with the dog who is afraid of rain. It's been thundering and raining and Jasper freaks out. He's really old but now deaf unfortunately, so maybe sleep is in my future. We can only hope. I did get a new mattress since I have spinal stenosis which means my backbone is narrowing and mashing on my spinal cord. That isn't so bad, but the spots where the nerves stick out from the spinal cord is also narrowing and that hurts. The new mattress is foam rubber and I can actually sleep on my right side for the first time in over a year. It's wonderful. I'm poor since the damn thing cost a zillion dollars, but I'm happy.

What sex drive? I haven't had a sex drive in years. I guess I'm too old for that stuff. It just takes too much energy. Luckily, I'm single. It would be a major drag if I were married since many men sort of expect that sort of thing.

I was informed that I have acne rosacea when I was in England. I hate it. My nose is going to be deformed someday. What did you get for it?

Our Wal-Mart was recently "upgraded." After 6 months of the new store, people still can't find what they want, but if they happen to find the right spot, what they want isn't there anymore. They dropped a slew of products, pretty much ruined the deli (their Black Forest ham is delicious), added some off brand restaurant, and, above all, added these little carousels for the plastic bags they put stuff in. I go in there and can't find what I want despite the fact that they've had this stuff for the 15 years I've lived here. Our Wal-Mart was one of the first 10 ever established and it is ruined. They have the little carousels so shoppers will put their own bags in the carts. We already have the lousy carts that never work right. We already have to take the stuff we buy to our cars ourselves, and now we're supposed to put stuff in the carts so we can trundle them out to the car. I know this because our housekeeper also works at Wal-Mart. She works in housewares. They totally gutted the floral department, the hobby department and the fabric department. We can get cotton fabrics and that's about it. I have to drive 25 miles to the nearest bigger town to get any of this stuff at other stores, not Wal-Mart. We used to have a fabric store, but Wal-Mart put them out of business years ago. Wal-Mart used to have very high shelves stacked with stuff. The high shelves are gone despite the fact that they no longer have security for shoplifting. My housekeeper said they determined that having security guards was more expensive than just letting people shoplift. The high shelves apparently contained useful goods that are no longer available. Maybe the lack of anything to shoplift has deterred crime. My response hasn't been a good one. I am v-e-r-y slow in paying for my stuff so the clerk will give up and put it in the cart. I have quit buying groceries at Wal-Mart. It's worth it to me to pay a few cents more and go to the good grocery store. I used to spend about $200-300 a week at Wal-Mart. The last time I went I spent $59 and that was for stuff that only Wal-Mart carries. I have been shopping at Wal-Mart since a store came to our town many, many moons ago. Now I don't. I wonder what genius decided to drive away all the shoppers. If your store hasn't been changed, be warned. It may come to your town next.

I don't agree. Most of us are the children of immigrants and not all of them came legally. This is just racism dressed up. Shame on you.

My God, I don't think we need to hassle younger women who find older men interesting. I just wish some younger men would find me interesting. Actually, one does, but he's only about 5 years younger. Some people are just born older and understand older people. BetsyJane -- I relate. My mother is 87 and lives with me. I'm the servant. She's not in good shape, but I think she's going to live forever just to spite me. I had a dream once that we died at the same time and met my uncle on the road to heaven. It was like driving through Nebraska or Western Kansas and heaven was in the mountains. Well, he's dead and we're still alive and I'm getting worried. What if I do die when she does, assuming she ever does? That would really irritate me. Mother had colon cancer earlier this year. She had it removed and the doc told her she could live another 10 years. Since I intend to die at 72, that will leave me exactly 2 years of freedom. I'm rather upset about this. Maybe I should live longer just to spite her. What do you think?

I can't believe you had your skin tags surgically removed. I just cut mine off with scissors. I cut one on my neck off tonight. God, I hate skin tags. I had some sort of old age thing on my leg and asked my doctor about it. She said it was an old age thing. So I cut it off and it hasn't returned. Botox is ridiculous. I note the ads in TV and the models are about 30 at the most. I didn't need Botox at 30. Besides it is botulin toxin. I don't think I'm going to willingly have botulin toxin injected until I'm really senile.

Very weird. I can't even feel my port. I recommend you check with a doctor about it. Maybe it has floated to some part of your abdomen that is sensitive. My port certainly has floated all over the place. If you had it stitched into place, maybe the stitches are tearing.

I think you are buying into the mainstream media's horse patootie. They want everyone to be thin, boring and vapid like they are. I was a very, very thin child and I gained weight due to clinical depression in my late 20s. I've recently read that some fat people carry a virus that turns stuff into fat cells. I think there are many reasons why people are fat and easy answers are not going to be forthcoming. Be happy that you are doing something about it. Be happy that you can afford to do something about it. Lots of people can't.

Oh, heavens. I'm fat and an arrogant bitch. Weight has nothing to do with arrogance or bitchiness.

I hate the hunk, but I'm old. I like the library couple except he's old and she's young. What does that say? Maybe two old people or two young people would be better. Or you could have an old lady and a young man. But I hate most all advertising despite my years in an ad agency. So what do I know?

I have to chew, chew, chew or I throw up. I sometimes throw up even if I chew. But I have the most trouble with stuff like apple skin, tomato skin, peach skin, and meats without something to grease the skids. I usually cut meats in Chiclet sized pieces (thanks TOM) and chew them over 30 times. I eat a lot of pork chops because the go down pretty well if I cut them really small. I can eat potatoes very well and soft vegetables, but fresh vegetables are out except tomatoes without skins. I have eaten about 2 salads since being banded and they went down, but I had to chew so much that I think I lost any nutrition in the chewing. Slime is a major problem. I think it actually stops up the hole to the stomach. I find that chocolate kisses help things go down, and sometimes I just wait around and it finally goes down. I eat bacon and scrambled eggs every day for lunch at about 2-3 p.m. Before that I can't eat, so I drink Unjury every morning. I have noticed that if I'm upset about something, stuff won't go down. My air conditioner stopped up and water ran all over the carpet in the hall and Mother's room the other day, and I couldn't eat anything. Since I had that fixed, I can eat. Weird, isn't it?

Good for you. I had surgery with Dr. Rodriguez. It was wonderful. In a year, you'll be thin little thing.

Can you say martyr? You are trying to do too much. Some of these folks should be able to manage for themselves and you must let them. You can't do everything. Believe me, I know. A person can be overwhelmed easily because we try to do too much. Just tell them you can't do everything and get some help. I have a cleaning lady and home health for Mother. It helps a lot. Look for some way to help yourself and don't be a martyr to other people. Sorry if I seem mean, but I know you have to stand up for yourself.

You're lucky you are 37. A sixty year old man is not interested in a 60 year old woman. In fact, I don't really know any 60 year old single men. But I know some who are younger and one of them seems to like me. He just lost a whole bunch of weight so he probably weighs less than I do, but I'm just thrilled that I weigh less that the starting line at the Super Bowl. One never knows about men.

I'm always very interested to see what people who don't teach think of education. They always think it's terrible. I taught one year of junior high and high school and quit for 15 years. The reason is that parents insisted on putting their kids who were special education students in regular classes. There is nothing I can do with a kid with an I.Q. of 30. Also the principal at the junior high called me in and told me to pass a kid who was a troublemaker. I said if I passed him, I'd have to pass everyone and he said, "Go right ahead." So I did. The kid with the I.Q. of 30 went to high school. People don't realize the pressures on teachers. Personally, I wouldn't teach high school for a million dollars a year, and I'd do a lot for a million dollars. I have taught at the university level for 24 years. I am one of the two full professors in our department who teaches Freshman Comp. I. I love Comp. I because I just love messing around with the students' minds. I lose about 1/5 to 1/4 of my class every semester, but the others hang in there and learn something. In fact, my students this semester decided to name me Dr. Hot Stuff! I wonder what that means since I'm 60 and definitely not hot stuff. But I'm really getting sick of parents blaming teachers. If you do not have a book in the house, how do you expect the kids to learn to read? I tell my students to read whatever interests them, including pornography though that's really boring. But students are probably more literate that we think. They manage to use the internet which primarily consists of the written word. Okay, "you tube" is big too. We must allow teachers to teach, not fart around with standardized tests. Every good college professor has learned that standardized tests are a waste of time. We wanted to get rid of that requirement for our M.A. program, but the president of the university demands standardized tests which cost the students big bucks. We simply ignore the results, and our grad. students are really, really good. Basically I just want to retire though. I'm sick of this crap.

I'm so glad you all are experiencing some of the same things I am. I have lost weight, but I'm wrinkled and droopy. I just hate gravity. Mother wants me to have a facial to get rid of wrinkles, but I claim that I worked for every wrinkle and deserve them. But I'm hanging in there, at least for 12 more years. That is unless something untoward happens and I croak early. The ice floe was a good plan. Maybe we should call Al Gore and complain. My brother and I intended to go up in the Rockies and freeze to death which is a nice way to go except one's limbs get really heavy when they are frozen according to Jack London. In "The Law of Life," he discusses the "being left in the cold plan" which didn't work for his protagonist who was eaten by wolves. That was a drag. Of course, there's always the "driving into a bridge abutment" plan, but you might destroy the whole bridge. That happened here in Oklahoma when a barge captain had a heart attack and drove his barge into a bridge abutment and knocked down the bridge. Killed several people and two horses. However, with the state of bridges in the U.S., maybe I can just drive back and forth across a bridge and eventually it will fall down. But I expect I will end up in a nursing home, drooling on myself and hungry enough to actually eat their miserable food. When I'm 70, I intend to remove the water from my band and eat everything in sight. Hopefully, I will have a year or two of decent food before I end up in the nursing home with "institutional food." It's a sad thing that the only things in life I seem to value are food, drink and naps. But that's age for you. Maybe I can find a nice man. Nah, takes too much energy.

I also used Dr. Arturo Rodriguez in Monterrey. It was a good experience. I picked the expensive hospital because I have heart problems and it was the nicest hospital I've ever been in. Everything is marble and granite with gold faucets. We stayed in the Hilton and had an English speaking guide available all the time. I had some pain the first day from the air they pumped in there so take some pain pills. I live in eastern Oklahoma and go to a physician's asst. in Coffeyville, KS for fills. I went and got the correct fill and haven't been back in about a year. I highly recommend Dr. Rodriguez, but make sure he's the right one. Apparently someone else has been calling himself Arturo Rodriguez, and they were upset and sent emails to all of his patients.

BJean -- I think I have finally figured out all the gadgets though I had to read the manual to do it. I even figured out the cruise control which is rather weird in my opinion. Maybe I should have bought a used car from your husband rather than this crappy dealership. I finally got the title today, but I have to sign for it and was busy selling my old car, so I'll have to go get it Monday when school starts and spend a whole lot of money on taxes to get a car tag. I sincerely hope I either die or get put in the nursing home before I ever have to buy another car.

I sold the old RAV and am supremely depressed. That was my favorite car of all time except for my Ford Pinto that I had years ago. Yes, it was the kind that would blow up if you were rear-ended. Luckily a very nice lady bought the old RAV. She needed it because her 86 year old father can't get in cars that are low. My 87 year old mother can't get in cars that are high. So it worked out. She was the only person who called for two weeks, and then I sold it to her yesterday and a guy called this afternoon. She's a much savvier buyer than I am a seller. She wanted to give me her keys while she did a test drive and I couldn't figure out why. It would never occur to me to steal a car on a test drive. Anyway, she kept trying to make sure that I knew she wouldn't steal the car. I finally told her that I didn't think she'd steal the car and if she did, I had her car sitting in my driveway. That seemed to satisfy her. Thank God I'm a professor. I would never make it in business. I'm so gullible and honest that I assume everyone else is too. I'd be broke in a month.

We have a grocery store that uses paper bags for the heavy stuff. I love it. They are so useful. They use plastic for drippy stuff and whatever the bag people can use them for without getting an earful from the customers. But I think I told you all about visiting Colorado where they not only used paper bags, but the guy took my groceries to my car!!! I almost fainted. In fact, he had this big cart which he put the bags in, and I asked if I was supposed to take it to my car. That's when he informed me that he'd be taking my bags to the car. Be still my heart. I want to move to that town just to shop at that store. About Walmart's cleanliness, I go along the aisles and pick up stuff people have knocked off of the shelves. I wonder how much money Walmart loses every year on stuff that people destroy. I have noticed that the other stores here don't have that problem. Apparently Walmart's attitude toward its customers makes the customers have a bad attitude toward Walmart. Or Walmart just attracts a lousier level of customers. I still shop there but I spend a fraction of what I used to spend. I only buy things I can't get anywhere else. I have discovered the Dollar store. They are great for cleaning supplies and stuff like that. I went to the Dollar Tree and bought 3 pairs of sunglasses for $3.00. I can't do that at Walmart. I destroy or lose sunglasses very quickly so cheap sunglasses are great. They also have superior gift wrapping. But our housekeeper (who recently quit, alas, sob) works at Walmart and she says she thinks the new practices have resulted in loss of business. They may be more efficient for the store, but customers are apparently voting with their feet.

I don't really mind changing things around though my furniture stays in the same place for at least 10 years. It's just that no one can find anything. Even the clerks can't find anything. But that's merchandising for you.

I will pack my own cart and rush out of Wal-Mart in the future since I really don't want to impact a clerk's paycheck. Actually, the clerks usually help load the cart so they can get on to the next customer. About loading stuff, I have a bad back. My spine is pressing on my nerves and it hurts. But I can usually load the car, unless my back is really throwing a tantrum. It's just that I'm old. I remember when someone always carried your groceries or whatever and put the paper sacks in your car. I remember when you pulled up to a gas station and an attendant not only filled up your car, but checked the oil, washed the windshield and vacuumed out the floorboards. And gas cost 39 cents a gallon! I remember going to department stores where elevator men in uniform took you to whatever floor you wanted. Then the clerks wrapped up your purchases in brown paper and string. Stores smelled good then. I suspect I was just spoiled as a child and should not mind all the wonderful advances we are experiencing today. Alternatively, maybe I'm senile and starting to reminisce rather than getting on with life.