Rockbandster--you do have an abrasive way of putting things!! While I agree that will power doesn't cut it, the answer is not as simple as that. To say that you need an identity as a healthy, fit, vital person is the same as saying you need will power.
The path is different for each of us. I have an eating disorder. I am a binge eater and an emotional eater. Have been overeating most of my life to stifle the pain. FOR ME, the answer is Overeaters Anonymous. I founde a healthy eating plan for me in June--no sugar and very little white flour--I switched to whole grains and found my food much more satisfying and healthy than before. That and the support, and the steps have helped diminish my cravings. "New studies" as they say, have shown that overeating and eating high simple carbs gives a hit of dopamine and serotonin--that feel good feeling. Great in my hopelessly serotonin/dopamine deficient life.
Once I started to lose weight I began to hope that I could have a WLS and not "eat over" it. I have the power to ruin any weight loss program with my compulsive eating and self-destructive behavior. So the AGB and OA ( which is the same eating plan--just smaller amounts) might work well together for me.
So far, so good. Banded 12/15/08. Lost 50 pounds pre-op and another 12 pounds in 2 weeks. Thanks to my newly active lifestyle, and walking, too. My self-esteem is up, my mobility, etc.
OH, I FORGOT!!! In Overeater's Anonymous we do not believe in willpower. We admit that we are powerless over food and that our lives had become unmanageable. This is a great relief TO ME. Now I know I am not lazy, crazy, etc. and can got on with things.
So, Rockbandster, this is the beginning of the answers I have found for me.
Anyone else want to share their thoughts and ideas? What you do? How you feel?
This is a great place for support. I have seen a lot of it. Lets keep it up. Thanks for listening to my random thoughts. kathy