kirsty39

Your article was so right on the money!!!! I cannot believe how much compassion you have for the obese. I can relate every aspect of that article to my life. I remember vividly the school nurse in 6th grade yelling out my weight of 144 pounds. The shame and humilation started from that day on! Here I am turning 40 in 2 weeks, still feeling so much pain from obesity. Emotional pain that I am still trying to let go. When I think of the cruelness of some I feel very resentful. Being told by the Marketing Director of my company "Start running with me, eat healthy and I will make you a Rep" Are you kidding me? I was a 20 year old, beautiful, OBESE, young women with lots of aspirations. One month later I was let go. I wish I had lost weight so long ago, I feel like I missed out on alot of opportunities. Not because I didnt try..Believe me I pretended to be sooo confident. Almost to make up for my disability. Now, that is what I consider it. I speak to someone once a week to deal with my emotional scars. It really does help. I applaud the Doctor for writing such a honest, eye opening article.

How bout this one. I am a server at a popular restaurant where one of my regulars called me over to tell me "wow, now you look like a normal person, oh you know what I mean" i responded, " i know I was a fake person before" that shut her up. then " wow, your apron hangs straight down and doesnt stick out anymore" wow gee thanks.. get some class people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was banded July 29, 2008, so 1 month after you, I have never experienced pbing but I have experienced over eating and feeling so much pressure in my chest and upper rib cage. On those occasions I know I screwed up, I could have waited to long to eat or just had too much. I understand you are very frustrated and want to blame the procedure. I think you are frustrated with yourself, I am in no way judging you. I have had my share of upset, guilt, sabotage. If you want to try to get on track just take it slowly. Try to excercise it really makes a HUGE difference. I have not been perfect since my surgery by any means. I wake up with the intention to follow my plan, but somedays I get sidetracked. I react to stress in my life that I am suppose to use new coping skills for (not always so easy, when life is being unkind) Just try to add some activities, the gym I hated so much at first now it is my sanity. I dont know you, but I do know if you make a few changes, measure your food, write it down (we eat alot without even realizing it, it is such habit) and excercise...You will SEE a difference, try for a week, act like you just has surgery and kind of start over. Dont waste precious moments being obese.. I have lost 53 pounds and feel sooooooo much better> I have 48 to go but my energy level is unreal. You complain about energy, you have to get moving to get some. Dont regret this operation or fool yourself that we can eat "normally" If any of us were capable of such a thing we would not been on this site right now. We are here because we have addictions to food. Good luck and maybe you should have an unfill, if you are truly so uncomfortable and NOT overeating.

I can totally relate! I felt the same way, I will NEVER eat like that again, i said to myself!! Until my life fell apart in NOvember, 70 year old mother needs rehab, loss of my job, then to top it off, my husband gets hurt and cant work!!! Very minimal income coming in, I had to get assistance, never thought that would happen, so I ate to soothe myself, I thought i had learned new coping skills but they went out the window and the food just called my name, I had surgery 7/29 and have lost 60 pounds, I have been at a stand still since early november, i still go to the gym, i start in the morning with positive self talk by the afternoon I am staring in the cabinets! I try to stay so in control for my 3 kids under 10 years old, I dont want them to worry, so when Im by myself i feel like i am having a breakdown.....I think things will turn around for both of us, its the ebb and flow of life. I guess it teaches us to be grateful for the little things.. Today will be a good day if I keep my food in check. I have certainly learned not to be so quick to judge... Just remember the amazing things you HAVE accomplished!! and lets rock on to 2009!! best of luck to you ...kirsty

I'm in, I did step aerobics yesterday, 45 min w/ 15 minutes of strength training with a medicine ball, today I just got back from cardio-kickboxing, so much fun, really makes me sweat!!! I go to the YMCA 4-6 times a week, my kids go in the daycare. I cannot believe I am going to say this but I think I love to exercise, and it definitely helps the scales move. Good luck everyone! love to hear how everyone mixes up their workouts

Hi, i dont know how to update my weight, i am not computer savvy. Will someone tell me how to go in and update? I have lost 3lbs and wanted to change the number. Thank you so much kirsty

Hi, I do the same thing, instead of being proud of myself and my accomplishments, 48 lbs and exercising at the gym 5 days a week. I focus on the bad stuff, the days that arent so perfect, how much more I could be down right now if I stuck completely to my plan. SO I can totally relate to your blog and agree that we should be proud of ourselves. Without this surgery I would NEVER had lost more than 5 lbs. Believe me, congrats girl., you will get to your xmas goal, we just have to refocus, you are already doing fantastic. I was banded on 7/29 in boston. GOod luck Kirsty

Hi, I would love to be in the challenge, I am not very computer savvy and dont know how to add my stats, could someone tell me how or possibly add me on? I would appreciate it, I love this website, have not joined in on anything yet though. This would be perfect Surgery 7/29 282 Current 237 would like to be 217 by new years eve!! Thank You, Good luck everyone. WE are worth this!

I am at the same weight as you, I was banded 7/29 have lost 40 lbs, I am also eating too much, till I am way full. I know I need to cut back, but my fight with food is always going on in my head. I also go to the YMCA 6 days a week, I am happy with the my weight loss and cannot backslide. I have had 3 fills, i think I am at 5.3 ccs, I get really really full. that isnt my problem, it is stuffing myself too much. I havent lost any weight in a week, it is my own fault.

I went from a 24 to a 18, I bring them to a support group and we have a clothes exchange. I also give the more worn ones to salvation army. congrats on your success, dont you love when your clothes fall off!!!! kirsty

Hi, I was banded on 7/29 in Boston and have lost 21 lbs. I cannot wait to get my first fill on sept 11th, I have absolutely no restriction and am completely starving, I have been excercising daily at the Y and just being very strict with myself, my doctor told me with the first fill is only 2cc, he can get me up to 6cc pretty quickly, so i am looking forward to that. Basically, if you dont get a fill, its like your not using the operation to its fullest potential. I dont think that your diverticulitis had anything to do with your surgery, I am not a doctor but have been hospitalized twice with that, it is one of the most painful things i have Ever experienced!!! I feel for you, usually that is from little bits of food, seeds, corn, poppys, nuts, popcorn, cuc seeds ect...gets stuck in your intestine and causes infection. I have to avoid all of the above or get a huge piece of my intestine cut out... no thanks..i am paranoid that i will get an attack again, so i am really careful.. I hope you feel better soon!! When is your fill scheduled for!! Good luck Kirsten

HI Lisa, Start a food and feelings journal, I find it sooo helpful on all levels. Just get a regular 1 subject and start. Right down How much your eating, try to write it down right after or during when you eat, otherwise you will forget to write things down.. Push the Water and see if you are sabatoging yourself with any higher calorie items. If you are honest in your journal, your weight will start coming off again! Good luck! you can do it... Kirsten banded 7/29 Boston Medical day of operation 272 now 250.2

Hi, I also had a terrible time with the protein shakes, I went to GNC and bought something called Isopure. It comes in 20 ounce bottles, many flavors, kinda taste like a kool aid drink, I could make it last 1/2 day and it has 40 grams protein in them!!!! Thats huge. I suggest trying these. They got me through the first 2 weeks. (about 4.29 per 20 ounce bottle) but worth it! you wont need them anymore very very soon! good luck

I also struggled with this decision, I am a waitress and am still out of work because of the lifting restriction. So, I told a few CLOSE friends at work, then word was getting around, so before I worked my last nite, I told my manager and the staff, they have been very supportive. Also, it motivates me even more that they know, it keeps me honest. I didnt undergo the months of torture BEFORE the operation (all the appts ect...) to not give this 110 percent, some days it is much harder than others. My mother was not supportive, because of course she is 70 and was worried i was going to die. As much as i told her it was non-invasive blah blah, so I stopped talking about it with her and told her the week before I was going in. Now she loves that i did this, she might see her daughter a normal weight in her life time. SO, it is a very personal choice. I know that my mother worried every minute for that week that she knew.... you have to weigh the options. But also make sure you do have SOme type of support system... Best of Luck KIrsten Banded 7/29 weight surgery day 273 weight today 252.6 yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was banded 7/29 and had to stay an extra night at the hospital because I was sooo sick, I could have never ever got on an airplane after that surgery.! I am 19 days out and feel lots of energy now. By the 4th day after surgery I was feeling a little better, the gas pains were horrible and I had a very hard time sleeping even with the pain meds. And i would do it all over again! i could not lose 1 pound, no control over food at all, I lost 50 lbs when I was twenty and gained it all back within 6 months! You will feel better, and empowered! Now I am feeling hunger, my fill is not for another 4 weeks, so now I have to kick in and do the work! I thought the liquid part was easy, you dont have to choose the foods to eat, that is a huge problem for me, I am writing it all done, being honest with myself, I already have slipped up twice, making the right decision is something you have to be in the present to do!

Thank you so much for that post Leslie, I had surgery 7/29 started at 272 now i weigh 257..18 days! at first i had soo much energy. When I got to have mushies at 2 weeks, i got carried away, I did not get sick or have any side effects I just knew I was having what I should not. It is sooo strange how you tried to fool yourself, like you have two different identities, one that is gung ho! one that whats the old you back (but not really) change is scary, but it is what we all need to do!I notice everyone does this at their own pace, some people really "get" it, i noticed at day 15, and had a long talk with myself, that i did not go through 6 months of tests and appt, undergo surgery, to let myself down...my self talk when I am walking really helps, my doctor told me week 2-6 are the most difficult. Thank you sooo much for your post, I love the mention of the thoughts and feelings that come sneaking in, I never ever allowed myself to feel them, i would eat. Now i have my tools, i.e. mediation, a quick walk, journaling, i try to let it go..... Thanks again kirsten banded 7/29 Boston Medical

OMG, I feel your pain, I went from the recovery room, still half out of it, to the swallow test, they had me 1/2 standing 1/2 leaning on the x-ray machine, and told me to drink that rancid stuff!! gross, i almost vomited, i was dry heaving, the entire ordeal lasted about 10-15 minutes but it felt like a lifetime!!! I was dry heaving violently, the nurse said to me "please stop trying to throw up" i told her it was completely involuntary. anyway, i am sure you are fine!, then can tell by the x-ray! good luck banded 7/29

congrats, that is remarkable, because the band is a tool and you have to work it.!! obviously you are very committed. You are an inspiration, thank you for sharing. banded 7/29 15 lbs lost

Hi I was banded 7/29 and also feel great but hungry. I also added more protein bullets. My fill is not scheduled until 8/21 because my doctor is on an african safari, i am due back to the nutrionist on 8/14 to be put on mushies. So, I am in the same boat as you, waiting 3 weeks and 3 days for a fill (but who's counting) lol ... good luck, i have to leave my appt the way it is because of the circumstances, sounds like you are on the right track, but vacation right before a fill., that could be dangerous. All we have to remember is, we have ate all the bad stuff before, we know what it tastes like, we are here because we liked it too much... that is what i try to think when my fit hubby is eating my biggest downfall ever (crispy french fries) if i got hypnotized that is what i would ask to look at like they were brussel sprouts.!!!! so good luck on vaca, let us know how it goes...

hi, glad to see you are better today, i too have taken all my liquid pain meds, so no food, pain meds, or cocktails...this will be surely a test, i feel fantastic and full of energy right now, i hope it lasts..first time i have felt control in a looooonnnggg time.. it feels awesome, i am one week post op today and have lost 9 lbs..bought a scale for the first time in years today..told my kids not to be obsessed by it. they have jumped on my calorie counting band wagon (my 15 and 9 year old) thank god they do not have weight issues (right now anyway) i love the popsicles and the v-8 as well. the v-8 is very filling. good luck girlfriend. we have the power!

I am so sorry that you have to deal with such ridicule and degrading comments from your sister. She totally seems like she has a mental issue to be so cruel to her own sister., she sounds border abusive to me. sounds like she should get checked out for depression, causes, anger, frustration all types of issues that you have nothing to do with. I would cut her out of your life for now, until she realizes why, and changes her ways toward you, this journey is hard enough, surrounded by loving, caring family and friends, forget the negative people, you are bettering yourself, why dont you tell her you dont need her negative energy in your life, (she might call tough love) she is abusive and needs to be stopped and only you can do that. she plainly is insecure, thin or not, she has issues. keep doing what your doing, this site is so amazing, i am so happy i stumbled on it. banded 7/29

I am at day 6, also feeling real hunger, i am not getting in enough protein, i really dont care for the protein shakes i have tried. my big treat is tomato soup, and popsicles. my chest still hurts to take a deep breath, and still have some gas pains. i have been walking every day 20 minutes. it is very hard to cook for my husband and 3 kids, the smells, everything about it makes me sick..then my husband brought home mcdonalds for himself the other day, it is all i could smell, told him he really needed to be a little more sensitve, since my downfall has always been fries!!! but i am journaling alot it seems to help to put feelings on paper, i am 39 and overweight for about 20 years...its my time now, i try to think, i know what all the food takes like, that is why i just had 7 months of hell waiting for surgery!!! keep strong, we are worth this battle, the battle is for us, i dont go to the dr. till 8/14 hoping lots of lbs have come off by then!! lots of water thats the ticket... good luck