lunadreams

Just got my date for July 20th, pending insurance approval and clearance from my PCP!
I'm both excited and freaked out...

the thought of regain is what has kept me on track for the last six years. I did bounce up 20 lbs after hitting my lowest weight (which admittedly was too low for me - I look better now), but that 10-20 lb bounce back during year 2 or 3 is extremely common, so I wasn't shocked by that. As for now, I know it'd be really easy to gain weight if I stopped paying attention - and the thought of that makes me pay attention! I still log my food and still weigh myself at least once a week so I can jump quickly onto any gain and get it back under control. This will probably be a lifelong thing...

Thank you so much for all the details of what it’s really been like!

My endocrinologist told me that people with lower BMIs may be covered, but only if there is a serious medical issue.

No one can answer that question for you. Only you can decide whether you're up for a permanent change in your relationship with food. But we can share our experiences. Like many people, I had a tough first week after surgery, but by week 3, I was much better. I had no major complications and I lost all my excess weight. I have no regrets or complaints of any kind. There are lots of people on here just like me. The thing is, people are more likely to post about unusual or negative experiences, so you won't see a lot of folks logging on to post "Everything is still fine." So reading the posts can kind of skew your impression of how the surgery goes for most people. Complications happen, but it's more common to come through the surgery just fine, with no major problems. I wish you all the best in making your decision!

I've been planning to have the sleeve, and have done all the pre-op requirements. If all goes well, I want to do WLS over the summer. I've been planning on the sleeve, as it's what my surgeon recommended for me, but now I'm wondering if I should go for the bypass.
I'm in my late 40s (done having kids, so fertility/pregnancy is not a factor in my decision), have a BMI of just over 35, with PCOS, diabetes, hypertension, and recently diagnosed with small Fiber neuropathy (we're not sure of the cause, though I've read a study showing WLS improves symptoms). When I asked my surgeon why she recommended the sleeve, she said it's because I have relatively less weight to lose, and, although it will require work and being vigilant with diet, she thinks it will be successful for me, and is less invasive and risky, though she also said she would be willing to do the bypass if it's what I want.
My endocrinologist said that the bypass has additional mechanisms by which it can resolve metabolic issues, but she'd suggest asking my surgeon about her rate of complications with bypass. She also said she'd be less inclined to push bypass for me, though, because my diabetes is well-controlled on one medication (A1c is usually between 5.7 to 6.0). My cardiologist strongly advised me to go with the sleeve, because she has a number of patients who were a "hot mess," medically, after bypass.
I want to resolve my cardio-metabolic issues, but the risks of bypass also really concern me. I've never been anemic, but I've been deficient in other Vitamins and have experienced Hair loss and other issues as a result, so I'm concerned I may be at greater risk for deficiencies and other unwanted consequences with the bypass.
I'm not sure how to decide this...help?

I’d definitely be open to an LGBTQIA+ forum, here or elsewhere.

I’d definitely be open to an LGBTQIA+ forum, here or elsewhere.

The soonest appointment the surgeon I consulted with had was about two months out.

Every so often I feel torn on these forums about my role and what I should say.
On the one hand, I'm a veteran now....and have had success with this whole undertaking that I feel pretty proud of. There are a lot of struggles and things that I can comment about with some hard earned observations and experiences. I can be all.....mentory...and have good mentor-ish things to say to newbies.
Sometimes I feel a responsibility to *provide a good example* and only say things that are in harmony with the bariatric sages...and play the proper acolyte to the Bariatric Authority.
But here's the part where I feel torn.
I also want to tell the truth. I want to be the kind of poster I really enjoyed reading when I was first looking into this crazy ride.
I want to be unvanished, raw and HONEST. Because I value that in people. I value that risk. I value those stories....because sometimes people really need those stories. Even if they're terrible advice and provide a terrible example! Sometimes just knowing someone else....occasionally has a horrible day and eats the entire pack of four Yasso bars....helps you to live your life and forgive yourself.
I want to say: Yes, I drink diet soda. I know it's probably unwise and I also know there's hype about it that's untrue....AND....I know a lot of you drink it, too. And some of you drink real soda.....and will probably rot in hell for it. LOLOLOL
Ya'll won't admit it....but I've seen ya. I've peeked in those windows and I know you do all sorts of awful stuff. You eat peanut M&Ms and drink soda and beer and buy the occasional McDonald's kid's meal and can of Pringles. At Christmas, you cheat. You eat stuff you shouldn't. You ate Halloween candy. Ok, it was just a couple of pieces...but it made you happy.
We're not perfect. We screw up. We make questionable choices. Sometimes regularly. We STILL have unhealthy food moments. We're works in progress.
Can we talk about it as adults...knowing it's a crap example...but also knowing that it's human?
We still do weird assed extreme things in realtion to food.
How many calories in two almonds and one dried cherry? I HAVE TO WRITE IT DOWN.
How many grams of protien in one pint of donated blood? How many calories do I lose when I menstruate? I had a cold and blew my nose ten times and the internet says snot is made of protien...do I have to up my protien?
I once heard a lady on one of these boards say....she had her flinstone chewable multi vitamin....for dessert after her meal. And it was delicious. 😳
Is it wrong to admit I wanted to slap her?
I'll admit it...I ate a S'more about two weeks after I had surgery. I remember it as the most exquisite thing I've ever eaten...and I nibbled that one little square of heaven all night in front of the fireplace with the Christmas lights on. Licked it, actually. Down to a stump. LOL.
And Yes, ..a part of me is still screaming at myself.....You had a freaking S'more right after your surgery???? What the actual H*ll???!!! What were you thinking? (I lived...crap, I even lost weight to goal...but I commited this food crime. Guilty.)
Sometimes I think we lose our humanity in this environment....because as some folks have noticed, there's a competative thing. Some weird ick factor of needing the best score...the tiniest dinner...the least daily calories. "I'm going to get down to my original weight of 9 pounds 3 ounces if it kills me. Could someone please eat the other half of my lentil? It's too much for me."
And then I think....crap, maybe these folks really ARE as together as they seem and I'm just nutty and disordered and still fighting through this mess everyday three years out...isn't normal...
But then I look at the number of folks who wash out...and think......nope. MOST of us are struggling and screw up. MOST of us continue to screw up and figure it out.
Would be fun to do the research to put an actual number on it....
But I'd bet at least 90% of us...have secrets they would never disclose in a forum like this about one screw up or another.
I think we need a Confession thread. Where correction is not allowed. Where worry and concern (and abject horror) are forbidden to be expressed. Where we can just let that other lost soul know....yep, I licked a S'more, too....you're not alone.
All sins can be forgiven. Tomorrow is always a new day.

Man, if I had a dollar for every critic who said this to me on these boards. It's a past time of a certain type of dieter....to send me hate mail and try to shame me for being outspoken.
"You're still overweight! You shouldn't be telling people what to do! How dare you not feel ashamed at that weight!"
Shakin my head over here.
If I wanted to be 140, I could be. Have been. Looked god-awful and felt like I was starving all the time.
If I wanted to be 160, I could be. Have been. I wasn't particularly hungry, got a reasonable number of calories, but thought I looked older.
I like a little more round to my angles. I like less sag, fewer wrinkles. Not real interested in cosmetic surgery. Picked the best option for me.
I like eating 1600 calories a day. I like having space in my diet for a couple pieces of fruit because I think phytonutrients are beneficial and important. I like how i feel eating a high Fiber diet. I like room to be a vegetarian some days. I like flexability. It's how I can face this as a lifelong change. It's how I can make peace with food forever....cause I know this plan is WORKABLE in pretty much all situations. I can eat on my plan during a holiday, a funeral, a birthday party....during a power outage, while recovering from an injury, during extreme emotional stress, on the road, and while dealing with my inlaws. LOL.
I typically weigh 165-170 pounds. I LOVE this weight. It is NOT "the best I could do because I couldn't get to a "healthy weight" ", it is an intentionally chosen set point. It's a choice. This is, I am 100% certain...the MOST healthy weight I can choose for myself.
That whole...Arnold Schwarzenegger's BMI was technically Obese when he won Mr. Universe figures in. BMI is flawed. It doesn't differentiate between light muscle frames and heavy muscle frames, bigger bones, smaller bones. Different ethnicities. Different body styles.
My feet, depending on the manufacturer are size 10 or 11. My shoulders are more broad than most men's my height. My butt, thighs and calves are overdeveloped because I rode huntseat and jumped horses for decades, even when I was quite heavy. My husband says they have a kinda superhero quality now. LOLOLOLOL
So here's the thing....If you feel inclined to send me a snarky note about how I shouldn't say anything....because I'm not American Media model skinny, you might have a problem.
As it happens, I have a good friend who models. He's 5' 10", weighs 157 pounds soaking wet, and they STILL wanted him to use coke for a week and fast...to look more sickly skinny for his last national ad campaign.
Our impression of body image in the media is grossly distorted and unhealthy.
And a lot of folks here....get a grossly distorted and unhealthy obsession with their eating habits, their BMI, the number on the scale, and how it defines them.
Please, please, please remember....health.
Physical health, strength, endurance, good labs, fewer medications.
Emotional health...loving yourself, enjoying your life, feeling challenged and happy.
Mental health...finding balance you can live with for a lifetime.
Love your strong healthy body. Love your good food choices that provide good nutrition to nurture that body. Love the flexability to make it work though the tough spots.
Avoid the fixations, the extremes, the inflexable rules, the disordered eating (and disordered not-eating)
You can trust yourself to get to where you need to be....without punishment.
Love yourself. Love yourself. Love yourself.

I just visited my endo and discussed this. Her opinion was to monitor my sugars post op and that if my sugars were fine after surgery I shouldn’t need Ozempic or Metformin anymore. Definitely a conversation to have with your doctor.