Nanook

Yes and maybe she could combine her tour with Bristol Palin!:crying:

I would think they would be drilled on all current events of the day and possibly even know who the judges were ahead of time.

How many other contestants had their breast implants paid for? Maybe she did it just for the implants and said whatever people told her to say. If she prepped that much on her body I'm sure they prepped on what to say too!:crying:

It's ok Plain we all make mistakes.

hollyberries, You might want to join www.obesityhelp.com as they have a revisions section under the surgical forums. They also have a RNY forum there as well as any other WLS you can think of. You may become a bit disallusioned though as you'll see people revising from every surgery there is so nothing is perfect and in the end it's a still remains a major struggle which is something I am preparing myself for. I went into lap banding thinking I would be successful and never was so now going for my revision to RNY 6/11 I am being a bit more realistic. I also joined a local support group which helps a lot with my questions and they have people there that had the surgery years ago and what issues they have had since then. You actually see them face to face which is a totally different experience than a forum. My daughter had the RNY a year ago and has dropped about 140 lbs but now is at a "stall" so it happens. This is the time she needs to kick in for herself which can be difficult for her and I'm sure doubley for me! Anyway good luck to you with whatever you decide, Nancy.

Patty, Before the Christians came I believe there were native American living here.

I agree with what you've said Julia, I'm just glad I live in the northeastern part of the US where most states have legalized gay marriage or are in the process of doing so! Nancy. PG is that what upsets you so much because you post from Connecticut?

Thanks Lisa, I like to be prepared for "anything' and how to avoid things like ulcers would be good. I hope you're doing much better now. I had an endoscopy after my lapband was removed and they found small polyps but said they were probably caused by my gerd medication but weren't cancerous or anything. Is that sort of like the nods you were talking about. I forget the actual name but they were in the fundus of the stomach (I think) lol. Anyway I too have been bad with NSAIDS since my removal and know to take Tylenol but it's never as effective but you've got to do what you've got to do right? I think those hiatal hernias can be tricky sometimes they see them and sometimes they don't but that's good if yours was fixed. Well have a very Happy Mothers Day, Nancy.

I think you're being honest and there's nothing wrong with that but I think you know that you can't change someone elses behavior. If my husband had come to me and told me that I was too fat and he wasn't attracted to me anymore I'm sure I would be a puddle of devastation! He also gained weight along with me and has gone up and down. I've never told him to and he's never asked me to. We've been together since 1980 and have been up and down a few times. With my impending RNY revision surgery he is thinking in terms of losing weight now too because he knows that it will be easier for him if I am. My sister used to get on her husband for his weight all the time and I don't know if that was the real issue or not with her dissatisfaction of him, they've been divorced for a few years now. Anyway my advice which is different than most here would be to really think about what you want from him. Are you afraid of losing him to death because of his weight or is it something else? Becoming thin either for the first time or "again" can be a very emotional experience for you and you might need to get in touch with what your true feelings are about yourself and your marriage in general, good luck to you Nancy.

Head hitting desk really hard:nonod:

OK let me ask you this Beth. Do you think your neighbors who you hold in such high regard would be the least bit offended by any of your posts where you're using the words "fag and flame" even if it is only to refer Perez Hilton? I have a feeling they would.

Of course I find someone being called a bitch and/or a cunt offensive, but Perez Hilton and I aren't on a forum together.

DownInSocal, I agree with what you've said. There's also a fat acceptance movement. I find some people who have faced hatred and discrimination before like your example of being overweight tend to be sympathetic to others who also have suffered discrimination and hatred while others take their anger out on others to make themselves feel better. Did I say "others" way too often??

Beth it did become about you when you used hate speech like "fag and flame". I don't understand how you feel it's OK to use it against "one" person when it's here for all to read and become offended by. Why don't you take responsibility for it?

I personally don't take Perez Hilton as personally as you seem to do. To me he's just some guy who has a blog spewing out National Enquirer type info. I don't read it myself or watch it unless he's in the news. I take issue with you using terms like fag and flame. Is your hatred of him because he's gay it seems that way when you use hateful speech like "fag and flame"?

I'll just put in my 2 cents for what they're worth. I chose the lap band after I was scheduled for RNY. I was afraid of the final commitment as well as the obvious invasiveness of RNY. So I had the lap band in 8/07, had it removed 10/08 and am now going through pre-op once again for the RNY I should have gotten in the first place. I think the real trick is figuring out which proceedure is the best one for you and I mean with your weightloss. Some people do well with the band and just the mere restriction works wonders and also some don't have complications. Those are some you can control and some you can't! It's really your job to figure this out as I've learned. Picking the lap band because you can always revise to another is not a good reason for picking it. Do you really want to go through two surgeries+? I have no problem with the lap band just it wasn't right for me. So research as much as you can and I've started going to support groups for RNY and it's really helpful too. Good luck Nancy.:thumbsup:

Beth, I think your true colors are showing for the times you're using the terms "fag" and "flame" etc...sounds like a homophobe to me!

Thanks Grandmalisa, I suppose I was just hoping since there was a rather large gang of sleevers here there might be some revisions to RNY too. I already belong to the other forums and that one you mentioned is very helpful. I went there a lot when my daughter had the RNY and had issues too like strictures etc... I hope things are better for your now with your ulcers etc.... How do you know you have an ulcer, just curious not a side effect we've dealt with in our household and hopefully won't. Take care, Nancy.:thumbup:

You did a grear job BJean, thanks, I can't type much today because my daughter's parrot bit through my index finger:eek: I think I'm done on this subject for now...

I wouldn't worry about grasping it you either do or don't. It wasn't meant to be a "joke". I just wanted to mention that I saw Oprah today and she did an interesting show on children being bullied today. They focused on what they called sexual harrassment bullying with children in grade school and middle school. They specifically had three parents on there whose young boys had committed suicide by hanging themselves after being bullied this way for a while. One child was buried just yesterday. Younger children are being bullied and boys called "fag" and girls "whore or lesbian". These kids don't even grasp what it is to be gay etc... at this age but are sexualized at earlier ages due to movies and TV etc... Anyway I bring it up because it was an important show, I think and you could go to Oprah.com and read about it and get other links from it. One thing that they mentioned is that we've told kids in the past and were ourselved told to "just ignore the bully" and this is the wrong approach. Kids need skills in which to deal with bullying and others who are standbyers need to be taught not to go along with the bullying and what the consquences could be. I'm sure some of this bullying could be passed down from parent to child so it does concern me when we use God to make it acceptable to condemn homosexuality what affect this could have, so think about it, Nancy.

I believe she was born that way but identifying it as most of us are raised to be straight in our culture came later.

Thanks Joan I can see so clearly now!

Plain I found this on line written by a Kathy Labriola and after reading this I doubt you'll have any more questions. WHAT IS BISEXUALITY? Many people are 100% gay or lesbian, and are drawn sexually and emotionally only to partners of the same sex. Others are completely heterosexual, bonding in sexual and intimate relationships only with people of another sex. But what about everybody else? A significant percentage of people do not fit neatly into either of these categories, because they experience sexual and emotional attractions and feelings for people of different genders at some point during their lives. For lack of a better term, they are called bisexuals, although many people prefer to call themselves "pansexual," "non-preferential," "sexually Fluid," "ambisexual," or "omni-sexual." The Kinsey scale of zero to six was developed by sex researchers to describe sexual orientation as a continuum. Heterosexual people are at zero on the scale, gay and Lesbian people are at six at the other end of the scale, and everyone in between, from one to five, is bisexual. People who fall at one or two on the scale have primarily heterosexual sexual and affectional relationships and desires, but have some attraction and experiences with same -sex partners as well. People at three on the scale are approximately equally attracted to both men and women. People at four and five on the Kinsey scale choose primarily same-sex partners, but are not completely gay or lesbian and have some heterosexual tendencies and relationships as well. WHO IS BISEXUAL? As you can see, there is no simple definition of bisexuality, and bisexual people are a very diverse group. There are several theories about different models of bisexual behavior. J. R. Little identifies at least 13 types of bisexuality, as defined by sexual desires and experiences. They are: Alternating bisexuals: may have a relationship with a man, and then after that relationship ends, may choose a female partner for a subsequent relationship, and many go back to a male partner next. Circumstantial bisexuals: primarily heterosexual, but will choose same sex partners only in situations where they have no access to other-sex partners, such as when in jail, in the military, or in a gender-segregated school. Concurrent relationship bisexuals: have primary relationship with one gender only but have other casual or secondary relationships with people of another gender at the same time. Conditional bisexuals: either straight or gay/lesbian, but will switch to a relationship with another gender for financial or career gain or for a specific purpose, such as young straight males who become gay prostitutes or lesbians who get married to men in order to gain acceptance from family members or to have children. Emotional bisexuals: have intimate emotional relationships with both men and women, but only have sexual relationships with one gender. Integrated bisexuals: have more than one primary relationship at the same time, one with a man and one with a woman. Exploratory bisexuals: either straight or gay/lesbian, but have sex with another gender just to satisfy curiosity or "see what it's like." Hedonistic bisexuals: primarily straight or gay/lesbian but will sometimes have sex with another gender primarily for fun or purely sexual satisfaction. Recreational bisexuals: primarily heterosexual but engage in gay or lesbian sex only when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol. Isolated bisexuals: 100% straight or gay/lesbian now but has had at one or more sexual experience with another gender in the past. Latent bisexuals: completely straight or gay lesbian in behavior but have strong desire for sex with another gender, but have never acted on it. Motivational bisexuals: straight women who have sex with other women only because a male partner insists on it to titillate him. Transitional bisexuals: temporarily identify as bisexual while in the process of moving from being straight to being gay or lesbian, or going from being gay or lesbian to being heterosexual. Many of these people might not call themselves bisexual, but because they are attracted to and have relationships with both men and women, they are in fact bisexual. While literally millions of people are bisexual, most keep their sexual orientation secret, so bisexual people as a group are nearly invisible in society. Gay men and lesbian women have long recognized the need to join together, create community, and to organize politically. Long years of hard work have led to significant gains in political and human rights, as well as a visible and thriving gay and lesbian community. Bisexual people have been much slower to come out of the closet, create community, and form political and social networks to gain visibility and political clout. Many bisexual people have spent decades working in gay and lesbian organizations, and in recent years, bisexuals have become more accepted as part of the Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender community. However, the rigid dichotomy between gay and straight has caused many bisexuals to feel alienated and rejected by gay men and lesbian women, and in recent years many independent bisexual political and social groups have sprung up. Many bisexual people complain that they feel like outsiders in both the straight and gay/lesbian worlds, and that they can't fit in anywhere, feeling isolated and confused. Studies have shown that bisexual people suffer from social isolation even more than gay men or lesbians because they lack any community where they can find acceptance and role models. Many gay men feel that bisexual men are really gay, that they are just in denial about being Gay, and that they should "just get over it." Many straight men are homophobic and hate and fear both bisexual and gay men, often victimizing them with harassment and physical violence. Many straight women reject bisexual men out of misguided fears that they have AIDS, and admonish them to "stop sitting on the fence and make up their minds." Bisexual women are often distrusted by lesbians for "sleeping with the enemy," hanging onto heterosexual privileges through relationships with men, and betraying their allegiance to women and feminism. Straight women often reject bisexual women out of fear they will make sexual overtures and try to "convert" them to being bisexual. Both the straight and gay/lesbian communities seem to have only two possible models of bisexuality, neither of which represents bisexual people accurately. The first is the "transitional model" of bisexuality, believing that all bisexuals are actually gay or lesbian but are just on the way to eventually coming out as gay. The other is the "pathological model", that bisexuals are neurotic or mentally unstable because they are in conflict trying to decide whether they are straight or gay/lesbian, and that they just can't make a decision. Both models see bisexuality as a temporary experience or a "phase" born out of confusion rather than an authentic sexual orientation equally as valid as heterosexuality or homosexuality. Some people see bisexuality as inherently subversive because it blurs the boundaries, confronting both heterosexuals and gay men and lesbian women with sexual ambiguity. As a result, bisexuality challenges concepts of sexuality, traditional relationship and family structures, monogamy, gender, and identity. Bisexuals cannot conform to the ethics of either the gay or straight world or they would not be bisexual. Instead they must re-invent personal ethics and values for themselves, and create responsible lifestyles and relationships that serve their needs even though they don't fit anyone else's rules. Some researchers have note that being bisexual is in some ways similar to being bi-racial. Mixed-race persons generally don't feel comfortable or accepted by people of either ethnic group, feeling that they don't belong or fit in anywhere, as their existence challenges the very concept of race. Like bisexual people, they spend most of their lives moving between two communities that don't really understand or accept them. Like biracial people, bisexual people must struggle to invent their own identities to correspond to their own experience. Forming a bisexual identity helps bisexual people to structure, to make sense of , and to give meaning and definition to their reality.

BJean, That's the way we should be about people and most of us have a hard time. I too admit I struggle with things like Plain mentioned earlier "the nuances". I had issues when my daughter first announced that she considered herself pansexual I had a hard time grasping it. I just wanted her to pick a sex so I could deal with it in my head. Now I've learned that there are so many different types of people out there and as you said their sex life really is none of our business. It's best to just live and let live. Sorry if I rambled too much, lol Nancy.

Patty it seems to me you have many relatives who are gay. Some people don't like to be labeled so it's really not up to us it's up to them and we may not necessarily completely understand where they are coming from. Just like your sister I saw in the news recently that the actress Kelly McGillis has come out of the closet as gay. She is in her 50s and has been married twice, to men, and has had children. She had a lot of trauma in her life and her feeling was that God was punishing her for being gay, that's how she came to terms with it. She has now reconsiled the situation and feels free to come out and be at peace with it. The trauma did not cause her to be gay she was gay since she was old enough to know. Anyway I would suggest, if you have not already done so seeing a film called "Prayers For Bobby". The film stars Signourney Weaver and it is about a very devout Christian woman whose son is gay and commits suicide. You might gain some insight from this but bring your tissues, take care Nancy.