BayouTiger

Hey y’all! Hope everyone had a nice Easter! I didn’t want to limit this to just Ladies in the title because I figured maybe if people just shared what they did, it could be a thread to help both guys and gals struggling with post op wardrobe issues!! So, today I sent 4 bags of clothes to the St Vincent de Paul shelter. Which was literally all of my clothes minus my “after” picture clothes I’m saving for reference. I’ve gone from a 24-14/16 since New Years so my old clothes are worthless. I’m worried about what to wear when I go out and about that’s not stretchy yoga pants and an oversized tee. If I’m losing a size or several inches every few weeks like has been happening I just don’t know what to do for ball games, drs visits, seeing humans IRL because anything semi-nice or structured that I buy, is gonna be pointless in a month! I didn’t think about it AT ALL until I realized, for Easter, I had to wear some workout leggings and a baseball tee because I have no real clothes! And even some shorts I bought less than 4 weeks ago don’t stay on my hips anymore. So I need clothes but don’t want to spend a million dollars on clothes that I’m gonna donate in a few months or less! Just wondering if y’all have any good ideas! I also don’t want to look like a slouch, but I don’t want to buy an entire new wardrobe til I’m way closer to goal than just 2 months out of sx. thank y’all!

So at my (almost) 8 weeks they adjusted my plan and bumped my calories up by almost 200 a day... and my fat... and my carbs... and my calories, because I simply wasn’t getting much in, and had lost 80 lbs in 3 ish months and they said for me that was a bit faster than they wanted to see it come off especially since I still haven’t been cleared to exercise yet. Well that was about 11 days ago and I’ve been doing right by my new NUT plan and getting everything in... well I’ve GAINED almost 9 lbs since then. And it makes me sick. Honestly I’ve cried every time I’ve gotten on the scale so finally, I just put it in the cabinet and deleted the entries from my app. I keep telling myself they know best and just stick with it, but seeing those graphs going the red way and not the green way is very NOT encouraging. I just need some positive words!! Thank you eta: not cleared to actually do what I consider “work out” but still walk 2.5 miles AT LEAST per day!

No lie, I start week 8 today, and have made no fewer than 6 ricotta bakes so far (I wasn’t on purée til week 3.5!) it really is the BEST! I added an egg to the recipe and increased the protein by 2 g per serving. When I feel like the WLS foods are getting yucky and monotonous, I pretend that I’m eating a fancy lasagna and honestly it’s so filling that I don’t miss the noodles at all! And I’m a BIG pasta girl! I’ve moved on to more solid foods now, but you can betcha bottom dollar we have a giant pan of freshly made ricotta bake in the fridge as we speak. It’ll honestly probably be in my dinner rotation permanently when I’m done with these stages! Admittedly I do add some low fat mozzarella to the recipe to make it more rich and protein dense. That does add some fat and calories, but when broken down over the 6-9 servings, it’s not much at all. My NUT has actually said to add low-fat/skim cheese (in moderate amounts) to meals to increase the protein as long as I wasn’t completely out running the calories and fat. And like I said across my recipes, once you portion it out, it’s only +15-30 calories and a gram or so more of fat. But then 2 added g of protein. So that’s my tradeoff!!!

This was my whole point about including the excerpt about me being previously anorexic. It’s NOT a sustainable thing, and yeah I was 96 lbs for 3 years surviving on 148 calories a day as a 3 sport athlete... but I ended up at 263 pre-sx... so it doesn’t work and it IS counterproductive in the end and long run... me, case in point! I just don’t see 800-1000 calories as “starving yourself” if you’re getting the right macros. Perhaps it’s the warped mind from when I was younger and actually living through (intentional) starvation. But I think it’s super important that even if not a medical professional, in ALL medical instances that we focus on the individual PT and their unique makeup and PMH, and not generalizations or broad spectrums, to provide the best care and treatment. @Jaelzion well said about the speed of loss not being important, I learned a lesson in that this week. Had a -25 month, a -38 month, and then I gained 4 lbs in my last 21 days. Was losing at a very very very molasses-in-July type pace. Now it’s coming back off, but in like 1/4 lb increments. So I have had to tell myself it will happen, be patient, keep following your plan, drinking fluid, and taking vitamins!!!

The protein powder + yogurt + some PB2 is an EXCELLENT high protein option. Got me through like 2 weeks when savory foods weren’t appealing!! You’re doing GREAT Laurent (you too Aubrey)!! You will NOT fail! You’ve got this!! You’ve got a support system here. A lot of people (including me) lose their support systems after surgery because people suck, so this community is super helpful and important in recovery. I’d you need anything PM me. I’m a newb (8 weeks out) but since you’re behind me, I can give you some tips and tricks that got me through the first 2 months!!

Had to quote this ^^^ because my cell bio studying butt REALLY appreciated the shoutout to the metabolic processes!! Long: Just to add. Quite a few peoples nutritionists, surgeons and PA’s programs are VLCDs. Atleast for the first 6 months. Mine doesn’t have me going over 1100 til June. I have a biology degree with a chem minor, so I truly get nutrition stuff. However... If it’s recommended by the team, who am I to say no, you’re wrong, I need to be eating more... To a surgeon who’s been doing bariatric surgeries since they were invented, and a nutritionist with a masters in dietetics from Vanderbilt... I get where you’re coming from, I really do. And I think you’re coming from a very sincere and concerned place. But from a purely scientific standpoint we are all different. And we cannot be treated as a one size fits all. There are people with diabetes, cancer, chronic pain, mental illness, etc. who go through these surgeries and lifestyle changes. All of those pts need to be mapped out differently based on THEM and their past medical history and their familial history. Our metabolic rates, our sugars, body fat, all the stuff that people want a “baseline” for, really don’t have a true baseline. Because it’s not one size fits all. It’s never a one size fits all. What might help you lose weight might make me gain it. What is too much body fat on you might be too little on me. If it’s going lower on Cals and carbs to lose or jumpstart, I don’t see that as such a negative thing like you’re portraying. You don’t have to restrict to something absurd like 500 cals, but dropping your daily calories by a few hundred for a short period of time is proven to be a huge factor in re-jumpstarting your weight loss. There’s a distinct difference between starving yourself and not eating a lot. I was a dx disordered eater when I was a teenager. I know what not eating is. And (I’m gonna use me as an example but I know there are plenty more, but want to only speak for myself) the 750-900 calories I’m getting a day is a heck of a lot more helpful and nourishing than a single low fat string cheese wrapped in a piece of ham and one blue Gatorade per day for 2.5 years. And I am eating 750+ calories of sustainable, clean, organic veggies and lean meats/seafoods with no additives or anything fake—very sustainable over time. Was being anorexic healthy? Absolutely not. Not advocating for that but rather in the opposite direction. You need to eat, but the devil is in the details with each pt and not in the broad “calorie range” scope. I see a very big difference in starving yourself and not eating much because of that previous experience. Just my .02$... Like I said, I really enjoyed the post, I just have a hard time even thinking about telling my doctors and team they’re wrong with giving me the diet they have me on, when this is the plan that’s been laid out for me, and many others as well. And they’re professionals. I mean, I paid almost $28K for this surgery (thanks no insurance and 4 days in the hospital), I’ve got to be able to trust that what my team is doing is to help and not harm me. And that they wouldn’t put me on a plan that will ruin my metabolism and make me unable to lose properly and gain back ridiculously. And that’s where these posts get harmful. Because they can have people doubting the road they’re on. I know for a fact it freaked me out good and well. We are all on the same, but separate journeys. I have to remind myself of that daily. You’re a good person Creekimp and very very knowledgeable. I honestly learn something new every time you post. I hope you dont take this as hostility but rather as an open dialogue as you are a vet; and I’m 2 mos post op with a medical profession and bio degree so I only know what I know from that. I promise I’m not being contentious but I know online tone and inflection aren’t always picked up and seen!! Also, how do you force yourself to eat that much in a day. I eat 6 “meals” a day and have to literally force myself to eat to almost misery each time to meet my goals. Do I need to add more fat or something to increase the caloric value of my food?!

Long post but I wanted to provide what happened to me to try and help!!! Weeks 4-6 were exactly like that for me. Couldn’t even keep dissolvable zofran down. (Bizarre I know). Was getting like 100-150 calories & 15 g protein a day... if that. I ended up GAINING 6 lbs because my body was starving itself. Also ended up at urgent care with a banana bag 3x bc of it 😕 Basically I was told I had 2 options. Wait it out, or he goes in with the scope. I said no thanks to the scope. I’m at 57 days post-op now, I’m eating (750+ cals/90+ g protein a day) and cooking and smelling things again. That nauseous pit in my stomach and sinking feeling in my throat that was there 24/7 is gone! It just happened. I woke up one morning and my mom was cooking eggs and I asked for some. Wasn’t nauseous like I used to walk through the house holding my breath while there was food being prepared. Ate 1/2 of a medium egg and slowly built up my textures and flavors and added on to my meals from there! It’s tedious and it’s annoying and we have all these goals and rules, and we want to do it right so these things SUCK; but just stay the course, don’t get discouraged (I know that’s hard leaning over a trash can 5+ times a day, been there) but do the best you can with how your body is reacting post op, and hopefully with a little time and trial and error, it’ll get better like mine did. Have either of you tried like swansons sipping bone broth? It sounds weird but is packed with protein, it does have a slight flavor and I add garlic powder and a pinch of Cajun seasoning, but I was able to tolerate little sips of it at a time when I was sick! It REALLY helped. I couldn’t do warm stuff for 6 weeks so I let it cool to room temperature, but some people the warm is really soothing and good for them! Also, bari surgeon, NUT, and the 2 MDs I saw at urgent care all agreed that when you’re in that nauseous can’t keep anything down stage post op, the thing you should be focusing on isn’t protein intake or calories, but rather fluids. I didn’t even think about that. I’d get upset the protein shake made me sick; and quit putting anything near my mouth for hours. Trust me, severe dehydration is TERRIBLE. My lips and face were literally bleeding. My fever was over 102 and my pressure bottomed out. No hyperbole, one of those 3 days I drug myself to urgent care, I thought I was literally dying. I got on Amazon immediately and bought a 32 oz tumbler and I just keep it filled all day long and sip away. Not saying this to scare you, just want you to try and get your fluids in!! Sorry for being longwinded, I know how y’all feel and I just wanted to provide some encouragement!! It gets better!! I didn’t think it would, but the difference between week 6 and week 8 have been light years. AND once I started hitting my calorie, fluid, and protein goals again last week, I dropped 4 of the 6 lbs I gained in caveman mode! If y’all need anything, please feel free to PM me!

Hi y’all, I’m back for some support because I can feel mine waning so quickly it’s actually outpacing my weight loss. So today I got to see a friend for a second for the first time since November. (I’ve lost 48 lbs since then). She told me I looked “sickly” and “50 lbs is plenty” and that I was going to regret “butchering my body” in 10 years when I end up back where I started. She said all what I’ve done is undermined the hard work that people like her have put in to do it “the non cheaters way out.” I was actually stunned to hear those words uttered to me. I’m not trying to toot my own horn, but I’m nice to a fault, like I get told by people all the time I have no mean bone in my body. I didn’t have the guts to stand up for myself in that moment. I would never dream of being unsupportive of ANYONE trying to better themselves. So seeing people I’ve confided in and spent so much time with in my adult life turn on me for something that was done for health reasons that would have eventually killed me, has absolutely demoralized me. I don’t need to be coddled, but a little bit of “yeah we’ve seen first hand, your health deteriorate in the last 2 years, this is definitely something that’s going to help you so we’re here” would just mean a lot. But alas, I guess my expectations are too high. This is my 3rd friend in 3 weeks to completely rail on me and tell me how dumb I am or how big of a failure I’m going to be, and I don’t think this isn’t the kind of journey that I can do on my own. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know who to confide in, and I don’t know how to convince myself that people are gonna judge and I’m just going to have to be okay with it. But I’m struggling. Never thought doing something to save my life would rid me of all my 3 best friends. And these aren’t co-workers or acquaintances, these are hang out every weekend, talk daily, been doing it for 5 years, type of people. How do I get through this? Any advice is welcomed and appreciated. Sorry for being so long winded. If you read this far, thank you. I just needed to vent.

Dont feel stupid! We are all humans. It happens. What i've found being a part of this community is the amount of information that we get from our respective programs are vastly different in many ways. Some get like NO info and no prep from a NUT or psych, some get TONS of info. Some plans do a calorie vs carb thing. Some dont allow any form of beef for 6 months. Some are a 6 step process to get you back to "normal food." Some say hey 4 weeks out, do what you can handle. What I've done over the last 6 weeks is researched from reputable bariatric centers across the country and kind of make a mishmash of the most helpful information and stuff that kept popping up. That, along with following some of the vets on here and reading through their posts have helped me greatly in the "What not to do" aspect. I honestly didn't get a lot of info for my surgery. Most of what I knew was from being with my ex who had the surgery a few years ago. But the packet I did get was not thorough and quite contradictory throughout. The nutritionist even got mad at me for using 2 T of 35 calorie mayo when it was ON HER RECIPE. So I totally get feeling and being misinformed and ill prepared. This isnt something thats easy and its not necessarily a line of thought that we're used to when we've struggled with weight our whole lives. So just give yourself grace, do your due diligence, and take care of that new and still healing stomach, you worked hard for it. The important thing is that you recognized your mistake, you did the right thing in calling your surgery center, and now you know. Like CatWoman said, most of us have been put on a no pasta, bread, high carb/dough NOPE list until months and months out, for example, mine is a nono til 8-12 months. Dont feel stupid, this community is amazing and super helpful. People can come off like theyre being harsh, but I truly believe that Its because they want everyone else to succeed too. Don't get discouraged. Keep your head up. And reach out to pretty much anyone on here and they're more than willing to help!! Goodluck, hun. I'm rooting for you!

Hey! congrats on your surgery and progress so far. Try not to freak out. I think at some point we have all messed up and had something we shouldn’t or too soon. I know what the nurse told you is scary about complications, but just monitor yourself and maybe give yourself some extra time for digestion before putting anything else in your body!! So my plan had me go from puréed food to “soft foods” so I just wanted to share a couple things you could try to bridge the gap between the puréed and regular food stage (I’m not allowed regular food til month 3 post op, but my plan is kind of strict) but what I’ve been eating in the soft foods/transitional stage has been like smothered green beans, moist soft chicken (I made a low-fat low cal gravy), sweet potatoes, ground Turkey (made some really good stuffed bell peppers with some this week but I’ve been really sick to eat more than half of one), I’ve done ricotta bakes (look it up, life changer), low cal/fat “lasagna” with egg instead of pasta, some ground chicken patties with spinach and green onions. what my NUT/surgeon told me is the new stomach is trying to learn how to digest properly for even months after surgery. So things very starchy or carby are dangerous because they can become gelatinous in the stomach!! So please don’t freak out, I know it’s scary! Monitor yourself and if anything starts feeling wrong besides being full, contact your doctor!! You’ve got this!!!

Thank you so much to everyone who has responded to this. But because of all of the helpful and incredibly kind comments I felt the need to update. I haven’t logged in in a while, I actually deleted myself off of all social media. I have an app that I take pictures every 3 days and I measure/weigh myself, and that is the only documentation that I need. At the advice of my Therapist (whom I’ve moved to seeing twice a week in these last 3 weeks) I did this to focus on me and my journey and not to let unsupportive people even enter my thought process. I can honestly say I’ve lost all of my people but my mom, dad and brother. One of the “friends” came around when she came to my house last week to pick up some tickets because I’ve been extremely ill the last 2 weeks (I’ve kept about 750 total calories down in 11 days and have had to get IV fluids twice, have to go back to the surgeon Monday 😕 I’ve gained 6 lbs back and have been so upset because NUT said my body is actually going into like “caveman mode”) When I walked out of the house she said “Holy sh!t, G you look absolutely amazing, I’m so proud of you.” And I’m not gonna lie, I busted into tears on my front porch. She then told me that I had inspired her to get back in the gym and she bought a digital food scale with the app like mine and same for the digital body scale. She actually looks really good as well. I’m really glad she came around. We’ve been supporting eachother now, in different ways (I’m not cleared to do anything but walk still— 47 days out) but keeping eachother accountable. The other 3, I don’t speak to anymore and the negativity that has left my life has been amazing. I don’t allow my family to post photos of me or anything anywhere so only the people that I have chosen (my family essentially) have been who have known so far. And that’ll be it. As you all know, this is hard. It’s SO hard. I was run over by a 1 ton vehicle and had 8 operations and had to learn to walk again 3 different times and that was a county fair cake walk compared to this. I just wanted to say thank you to all of you. I know you’re strangers on a message board, but you guys have been better “friends” and support system than I could ever imagine and I’m so so grateful for each and every one of you.

The most hilarious thing to me is that one of the “friends” gets Botox, fillers, and a second one just recently had a gingivoplasty because she “didn’t like the way her teeth looked.” How is having cosmetic surgery any different or cheating than WLS? They’re just cheating age and poor gum maintenance! But that’s all fair game, when we try to do something for our health it’s put in the “pathetic” and “vain” category. It’s so messed up.

Thank you so much for saying this. I really really needed to hear it today. It has literally made me cry. I still haven’t fallen asleep (it’s 8:15 AM here) because I tried taking my medicines for the first time since surgery last night (i can’t crush them) and it went absolutely horribly. Those negative thoughts are very prevalent this morning. I really appreciate your response, I know it’s probably frowned upon as far as a little white lie, but I decided I’m not telling another soul and from now on I’m just gonna stick to the “I had a hernia and diaphragm repair, and I’ve been dieting and exercising”

Thanks for the support :) talking to her today made me realize that ultimately what I’m feeling is pretty normal because of the massive changes going on, my natural issues with anxiety and depression, and being young and trying to overcome these health problems. Being told 4 months ago I would have a stroke in the next 6 months and probably die at 29 was a huge eye opener. Being reminded by my therapist of my WHY and not my WHO really helped me today. Because the WHO isn’t important. It’s the WHY! My sister used to be my best friend until I started being successful in life and she became jealous, cruel and even a slight saboteur. So I should have known it would seep into this. No contact is hard, blocking her number was hard, but truthfully blood only matters for transfusions and transplants. Doesn’t mean you have to keep blood around if they’re toxic. I agree that it will benefit me immensely in the long run to be mentally stronger, and really what’s weakened me has been these “friends/family” so hopefully with them all completely no contact, it’ll enable me to focus on myself and instill positivity in myself instead of being constantly being drug down!!! Thank you for being such a great resource on here, Hop!

Are you wanting to flub and eat the corn chips, or are you talking about flubbing and eating the fudgsicle? If just the fudgsicle, give it a few more weeks and try again, I know someone who had issues with dairy until like 3 months out and then she magically could tolerate it one day once she got on more solid food. Now if youre talking about eating corn chips, please dont do it. You went through a lot to get this surgery and something so abrasive like that so early is just a disaster waiting to happen. Remember, you have staples holding freshly dissected tissue together. Those staples are not invincible and are susceptible to tearing, herniating, leaking, and getting infected if you push it. This was major surgery. I know its hard to resist the real food. My dad showed up with gumbo, jambalaya, and chicken shawarma the other day. My nephews came over with one of those giant tubs of cheese puffs. At one point I had to get up and go for my hourly walk just so I wasnt tempted. You are stronger than you know just for going through with this major life change. Full fluids are only for a couple more days! You can do this. Please reach out if you need anything. Goodluck.

Mischa, I am not attacking you in anyway, infact, I enjoyed our conversation last night. But Nova hit it on the head. I dated someone who was almost 2 years post-op VSG when we met, and she had JUST started drinking soda again then, for the first time, as her program didnt allow it (at all, but she felt that at 2 years she was good). In the 3 years we were together, she gained back 66 lbs of the almost 100 she had lost. When she went back to her surgeon and they did a scope, her pouch had stretched to almost 3 times its size he had it post surgery. He attributed it NOT to her increasing her food volume increase, but rather resuming her ritual of drinking diet dr pepper often. And he's not some quack doctor, hes one of the foremost Bari surgeons in the United States. I'm not in any way saying that this happens to everyone or even a lot of people that returns to drinking soda after their surgeries, but I just wanted to give you a real life experience with it and why people are worried about you wanting to drink something so carbonated with such fresh incisions and so soon after surgery. Carbonation expands exponentially once its digested and encounters stomach acid and causes your stomach to distend to accommodate the pressure and volume that the gas is taking up (why it makes you burp so much)... right now your stomach is so small, that even a tiny bit of expansion can really be dangerous. Maybe not catastrophic, but I would hate for you to cause yourself more pain, as you're already nauseated and not feeling well. Might I suggest getting on Amazon and purchasing some ginger chews. When I was going through my hernia and nausea issues, they were a lifesaver! Goodluck hun, try and stay positive, I know some things may come off as harsh, but the people (the very very vast majority that I have encountered) really just want to see others (including you!) succeed!

Goodluck tomorrow, Tim!! I can’t give you any advice on pain bc I had a hernia and diaphragm repair and that sucked, but definitely get up and walk whenever and as soon as you can! The CO2 pain is worse than the staples in your gut!! I’m not sure if you’ve ever been under general anesthetic, but if you haven’t and don’t know how you react, I would just ask for a few CCs of Zofran in my IV from the CRNA prior to them taking you back. It’s not got any narcotic, sleepy, or negative properties or side effects except being an anti-nausea and anti-emetic. I do terrible with anesthesia so it’s my go to. My last bit of advice is to work really hard from day one to train yourself to take in VERY VERY small amounts of fluids at a time. I’m a gulper always have been. So I’ve had to REALLY work on it. Because that restriction is legit the first week. But it does open up and you can drink and not feel parched!! I actually tried my first protein shake and instinctively took a huge chug of it and sat up straight miserable for 2 hours waiting for it to go down. So that was my lesson. Baby baby sips til my pouch opens up a bit more, which my surgeon said will happen as I’m able to add more than just liquid!! You are going to do GREAT!!! You have a ton of support on here! Your posts are great!! Please keep us updated!! Goodluck and congratulations! Ill be thinking about you!

It was my first time, and it was an immediate “ohhh nooooooooo!!” When I tell you I thought it was going to come through my nose if I breathed, I am not kidding. Honestly of all the binging and shoveling I’ve done throughout my life, double hamburger, large cheese fry, large Diet Coke in a sitting (and like 15 minutes 😬)... that was the most miserably full I have ever been. I guess our old habits die hard lol. Now I’m terrified to start the puréed stage.

Ahhhh. Congratulations!! You can so do it!! I didn’t sleep a wink the night before my surgery, and I had a 3.5 hour drive the next morning for my 7 o’clock sx! It’s so worth it!! I’m 2 weeks out and I feel AMAZING. Today I lifted a 20 lb bag of dog food instinctively, and ended up on the couch for the rest of the day (13 days out). But I got my fluids in and some liquid Tylenol end I feel so much better. The best advice I can give you is to get up and walk the halls as soon as your nurses give you clearance. It helps disperse the gas in a major way. The gas pain is worse than the actual procedure!!! I wasn’t allowed out of bed for 48 hours; but as soon as I was able to get up it was almost an immediate difference!!! You might (not everyone is, but I just wanted to share with you just incase cause I wish someone would have told me) be swollen after surgery and it maybe hard to get fluids down the first couple days! Don’t get discouraged! Experiment with temperatures, different types of liquids and SF flavor additives (preferably with electrolytes) until you find something that sits well with you. At the beginning take BABY sips. By Monday (day 9) I was able to drink 2-3 sips at a time til restriction hit, without feeling like I was drowning and that’s when I knew the swelling had gone down!!! I will say a prayer (I really hope that’s okay and not insulting, if not I’ll just send you very good thoughts) that you don’t swell up too much and you’re able to tolerate your fluids super soon!! If you need anything from a 2 week out surgery buddy (I’m 2 weeks out, but bc of being in the hospital so long I’m really on week 1), please contact me! I may not know about the months post op stuff, but I’m right here with you in the immediate aftermath!! Also, vets such as @catwoman7@Jaelzion@JMJames92@ms.sss@Arabesqueeven though not all have had the same surgeries have been a wealth of knowledge to me, I would highly highly suggest reading their posts, advice, tips, and tricks even on older threads. They’ve been a godsend, encouragement, and a stranger support system from afar that I never knew I would need and benefit so much from. Goodluck, stay positive, and please reach out if you need anything!! Please update on how you’re doing in a few days!!!

I actually had an appointment with my therapist today, (thanks to everyone for encouraging me to get in with her sooner rather than later) and after a lot of talking and processing, I went no contact with my sister and 2 other acquaintances for my own mental health. I know I’m going to need every ounce of it in the next 6 months. It sucks, but this is for ME!! I have suffered from chronic Panic disorder since I was in a severe wreck, so when I feel like I’m being insulting, or mean, or anything like that I start to freak out, so I just try to avoid confrontation even if it’s something that hurts me (talk about unhealthy). But that’s something I’m working on. I’m learning quickly the thinner I physically get, the thicker my skin needs to be. My weight has never been a joke per se, but the people in my life have told me my wreck (and 7 major reconstructive surgeries), my hypertension, and the medicine I’m on (serious serious weight gain implications) (125 lbs in 18 months, eating cucumbers and balsamic for almost every meal) isn’t an excuse to have gained this weight nor a reason to have surgery to rid myself of it. So to them it’s just always been invalid. My therapist also mentioned that the reason I’m getting so many negative reactions, comments, and people walking away after telling me I’m an idiot, ignorant, going to be a failure, and am “ruining my life for one year max of looking good” is because almost everyone in my life is either obese or morbidly obese. And to them it’s seen as “not fair” and “the easy way out.” This board has provided more support to me in 13 days than anyone in my entire life. I’m so grateful to have found it and to be a part of this community. Thank you for taking the time to respond and provide me with some more insight and encouragement that I can do this! I know I seem like a wuss complaining and seeking advice and encouragement, and so many people do and have done this “alone.” Thanks again, I appreciate you. I’m gonna start practicing the BCABD way of life and tell people sayonara! I really hope I’m not being a burden on anyone. I know I’m long winded. I’m sorry!

My sister has been the same way. She and I aren’t very close, but when she found out I was having the surgery for my hernia, and was going to have the VSG while they were in there, she made a comment about how “well now you’ve finally got an excuse to make yourself lose that weight.” She knew I had the surgery because I had a balloon in my chest and severe blood pressure issues. But she didn’t care. Im a cheater. But she weighs 135 🙄 That was in November. Haven’t talked to her since. She texted and asked my parents how I was doing, and they told her I had lost 50 lbs and her response was “let’s see how long that lasts.” After that response I said ya know what, sc*ew em all. This is for US. Not for anyone else. I know it’s corny but I believe that the best way to heal, succeed and improve your life is to surround yourself with positivity and joy. If the people in your life aren’t about that. They don’t deserve to be there!!

Congrats on your impending surgery!! It’s a life changer for sure, and I’m just at the beginning. I have a 75 lb pitbull mix who things shes a Yorkie and loves laying on me, and a chiweenie. I ended up boarding them for the first 8 days, so I gave myself enough time to get though the initial post op pain (couple days max), and where I felt I could safely hold a leash and handle the dogs without ripping up my newly created digestive system. As far as taking care of yourself post-op, I just set up my side table with my fluids and any medicine that I might need so it was within my reach and I didn’t have to go too far. By day 6 I was up and walking every 45-90 minutes, and I had a lot of issues post op and was in the hospital for 4 days. Then one day (day 9) I woke up and it was like I turned a corner and feel normal again. It’s rough until that happens, And finally, about losing the support system, it’s not easy. But this site and the vets have been an absolutely invaluable resource to me and there is SO much great info on here! It’s pretty amazing that strangers from all over the world come together to help eachother!! Goodluck, youve made an amazing decision for yourself, someone told me recently “if they aren’t with you, they’re against you.” That’s helped me realize who deserves to be on this journey with me and who doesn’t. You can do it!! It will change your life in just a short time!!! -G

I’m only 3 months into the program and 2 weeks out of surgery, but today when I took my 2 week progress photos I noticed a big difference in my chest. So I put on my old 48 DDD and my boobs didn’t even fill it half way and the band was gaping in places. I’m not gonna lie I kinda freaked out lol I had a lift and a reduction prior to me gaining the 130+ lbs. So I went digging and found a really old bra and the C cups fit me for the first time since I was a freshman in college (2009). To say it’s bittersweet is an understatement lol I think my first set of Plastics is probably going to have to be my chest. My reduction and lift is basically worthless now and even at my HW, they were one of my few liked assets!! Hahaha I’m so glad you said this, the constant adjusting throughout the night had gotten real old. Being a stomach sleeper with big boobies is not easy!

Mischa, you and I are surgery buddies. I was sleeved the same day you were. I want to reiterate what Jaelzion said. Until yesterday I could not get more than 38 ounces of fluid and 20 grams of protein. I called my program and spoke to my nutritionist and she told me to aim for 50oz water, mix it with some Gatorade zero or some kind of supplement with electrolytes and just fight it out until . I have, by the grace of God been able to avoid needing IV fluids; but these last 2 days have been hard on my actual body. I was getting 5000 steps a day (their goal for me til week 4) and today I couldn’t get out of bed. The weakness has been overwhelming today!!! Just keep sticking with it. It gets easier as your swelling goes down. I’m now able to take 2-3 small sips every 15 minutes. 2 days ago I couldn’t even get 20 oz of fluid. Keep trucking!! I’m just a stranger but I believe in you!!! however, today I tried my first protein shake since sx and out of my old “chugging habit” I took a GIANT gulp. I had to sit straight up for 2 hours until it went down. So please just go at your own pace. I’ve notice you’ve struggled too, although in different ways than I have. If you need anything please DM me, as we are on the same track and will be going through the same stages at the same time. Some of us need support and if you need it, I’m here! Keep fighting, it will be worth it! Goodluck!! Gäbrielle

This. This right here is what people don’t get. It’s a tool. My ex had the surgery in 2016 (prior to us meeting), she lost a decent amount of weight, but made TERRIBLE choices regarding eating after, and in the time we were together she ate so poorly and stretched her stomach back out so much that she went from 4 bites on a first date 2017, to being able to eat 2 orders of sushi in one sitting this summer plus a beer. So I saw literally first hand how just because you have this surgery, doesn’t mean you’re not gonna end up 260 lbs again if you don’t use the tool you’ve been given properly (more like worked your ass off for). Thanks for being so supportive. These “friends” are going on the trash heap. I have no time or energy for these behaviors when I’m working on a better me, I don’t need people tearing me down!! I just had a very small circle (4 people) and now, they’re ALL gone. I appreciate you. thank you for your comment!!!