1000islandgirl

Good Morning Everyone! So I have to tell my Father that I'm having the surgery on November 10th and I'm telling him tonight. I'm really nervous about it. He is the sweetest thing on Earth so I'm probably causing my own anxiety. The thing is my Aunt Susie (whom I'm named after) had a gastric bypass 46 years ago<<<yes you heard that right 46 years ago! In those days they reversed the operation after the patient lost their weight. My Aunt had the first operation with flying colours. The reversal was another story. After surgery while still in the hospital she got sepsis and eventually went into a coma and passed away. She was only 31 years old with two young children. It is a tragic, tragic story and I'm sorry for telling it however I don't want my Dad to be completely freaked out. I'm not at all freaked out. I have been on this journey since August 2019 and I have gone through all the medical and psychological testing required. I've done my research and the team that is taking care of me is from a "Bariatric Centre of Excellence". I'm not afraid. I'm excited. Besides that I'm pretty healthy. So any advice? What would you say? Would you even tell him? Suzanne

I had to do 3 weeks of Optifast (liquid diet) prior to surgery. What helped me is that my bariatric team said this liquid diet was to shrink my liver. They have to hold the liver up and out of the way when doing surgery. Apparently liquid diets really help to make surgeries more successful. I just kept telling myself that I wanted the best possible outcome for myself and that it was really important and it was only three weeks! Out of a lifetime of being obese three weeks was nothing! I knew this was my last chance to change my life and get healthy. Plus a note on the fridge listing "why* I was doing this was helpful too. Hang in there! It does get better.

I am in Ontario and almost 6 months post op RNY. When working through the OHIP process for bariatric surgery there are a lot of resources provided including documentation on all the do's and don'ts etc. I believe that all of these surgeries covered by OHIP are funnelled through the Ontario Bariatric Centres of Excellence. This way they were able to achieve some level (using that loosely) of standardization. I would be very surprised if the clinic/surgeon you are going through doesn't have some sort of similar options to offer you. Sometimes advocating on your own behalf isn't easy but I personally think the surgery is the easy part. The rest is what's hard. I would like to send you a pm but I have never done that in here. I will give it a try.

Thanks for this. I'm going to give this a try. I have cravings for something sweet and occasionally wind up taking a bite or a small piece of something my significant other is eating. I will have to get some pumpkin puree as it is not a normal staple in my cupboard. I wonder how long it lasts once its opened. I will have to google.

I think I am wanting snacks more often than I should. Perhaps this is because I can't eat very much during my regular meal and my body wants more? I think to deal with this issue I'm going to go back to recording my food to actually understand how much food I'm taking in and I'm going to get some therapy. I think that the surgery helped my fat body, it didn't help my fat head...lol. Before surgery I tried many things to help me get it "right" although I never did. There are a ton of reasons why I ate and why I eat now. I want it to be about nourishing my body and not about all the other reasons why I want to eat.

Hamburgers are one of my favourite foods. Of course I also liked the fries that usually came with them. We are in a lock down situation in Ontario, Canada so there isn't an opportunity to go to a restaurant. At home I eat just the patty with all my favourite trimmings and I cut small pieces with a fork and knife. I can eat about 1/2 to 3/4 of a patty. With the trimmings I feel quite satisfied. I think it is quite "normal" to order a hamburger with no bun in a restaurant if you don't want the bun. I'm just shy of 6 months post OP.

Perhaps if you think of consulting a surgeon as more research, you will be less nervous. When you consult with a surgeon or enter into a program to have surgery (as we do in Ontario, Canada) you have all kinds of tasks you have to go through, blood work, seeing a nutritionist, maybe a psychologist, other testing like EKG etc. At any point in the process you can still change your mind. I didn't consider anything as a final decision until my surgery date was booked. I realize there are different processes every where and different requirements but it took me over a year between the first time I contacted the Doctor to my surgery and I learned so much along the way that even if I hadn't undergone the surgery I felt that time was still invaluable.

I had surgery in November of 2020 and I'm 32 lbs away from my goal weight of 175lbs. I can relate to what you are talking about. I am way smaller than what I was and I have pictures to compare myself to but it isn't how I "feel". I still feel really big and sometimes feel very bloated and puffy. I think I really have a distorted view of my size. My boyfriend tried to help me with my perspective when we were on a hike this past weekend. He very discretely and quietly showed me women who were larger or smaller than me. Friends in WLS please don't think we are judging these people. He was only trying to give me a visual perspective of my journey so far. He also reminded me of times we went hiking in the past and how I would sweat profusely and be out of breathe and so very tired when we finished a hike. It really helped me realize that the main reason I did this was to get healthy and my size or number on the scale doesn't matter. It only mattered that I was able to continue to do what I love (hike) more easily and with greater energy so that I could better enjoy this hobby with him.

I was told that as long as I wasn't taking any of my pain medication anymore and if I wasn't too tired to drive it was ok for me to go ahead.

At any given moment in time people are going through their own stuff right? You have your issues, problems and bias and so does every other person on the planet. How you choose to respond is the only thing you can control. I've heard the saying "don't let people live rent free in your head" from OA (Overeater's Anonymous) meetings I've been to and by a friend I have who attends AA meetings and is a recovering alcoholic. That saying implies that you should "do" something if you have something that is playing on your mind. The thing you decide to do can be anything from writing about your feelings on the matter, working on letting it go, or talking to the person about the situation. Perhaps what you did here ...telling us the situation is all you need to do. You got it out of your head and onto paper (so to speak). Sometimes the "action" we should take is only with ourselves. If you feel this will cause conflict that you don't want to deal with at this time, for whatever reason, it is ok to no act or react to it.

Hi Everyone, My surgery is on Nov. 10th and I have started my liquid diet. It's Day 2 and I never though I would get through Day 1 without eating my arm off! I was sooooooo hungry. I had a headache (I took tylenol) and I went to bed early to try and sleep through the hunger. I don't know how many times I opened the fridge door and stared inside. The funny thing is there is next to no food in there but ...........mannn.......I could have eaten anything! I'm glad Day 1 is over with. I've had my first shake this morning and I'm drinking coffee and water. I am currently working from home because of the pandemic. I'm trying to keep my mind on my work but as you can see I'm here and sharing. I'm sure today will be easier than yesterday. I'm sending positive vibes out to all of you...wherever you are in your journey. Be kind to yourself!

I'm pre-op as well and I feel like I have been working on coping mechanisms for quite a few years now as I became more and more aware of how I am a sugar addict/compulsive overeater. I don't go to OA now but I have gone many times in past years. Friends from OA taught me how to use things other than food to help me cope like: Calling a friend, going for a walk, journal, praying/meditation, quilting. I would say journaling has been my biggest help. When I didn't know what to write I either just put my pen to paper and kept writing anything for 15 minutes. Even if I wrote the same word &uck 1000 times I always felt better afterword. You could write a gratitude list or.......write about an issue that's been bothering you. You can burn it afterwords. No one has to see it. Another thing is to write a letter to yourself but do it from the perspective of a good friend. In other words a good friend would be kind, forgiving, loving and caring. She/he would want to take care of you. Best wishes on your journey.

Wowzer Congratulations! You look terrific! I feel sad that I didn't do this sooner. I'm so glad you did this now instead of in your 50s like me. Good on you girl...enjoy!

Congratulations! I love this post!

I have a boyfriend "policing" me and I haven't had surgery yet! This is not anything new and it's not just about weight it could be about anything. This past weekend it was about the dishwasher. He doesn't live with me although we will be building a house together in the next 2 years. He is aware that he does this and as soon as the comment about whether or not I should be turning the dishwasher on, was out of his mouth he realized it and apologized. I think its a habit for him and I'm going to keep saying things like I did this weekend. I asked him "if it was really that important to him when I ran or didn't run the dishwasher?" I told him he better start to consider "which hill he wanted to die on"....LOL.....he got the point. I figure if I respond back without malice but gently make him aware of what he is doing and at least make him aware ...it will help. I love him and he is a good man! I'm just not going to let him be the "food police"

Welcome!

Good Morning, It does sound like quite a journey already for you! I'm sorry that you have had such trouble with eating but I'm glad your Doctor is taking good care of you. I don't have any advice because I'm pre-op but I'm just wishing you a speedy recovery. I know it must be hard being at work with little or next to no energy. ~Hugs~ I hope things get much better very soon.

I like the Optifast shakes. To the vanilla I have added Mio water enhancers so if I want something a little fruity it is great. I just had blueberry/raspberry and it was good. I like the idea about adding instant coffee to the chocolate. Someone else told me to add mint extract. Day 4 for me!

Thanks everyone for your thoughtful replies. I told my Dad last night over a cup of coffee (decalf LOL) and he was very supportive. He asked a lot of questions and I answered them to the best of my ability. I explained to him why I hadn't told him sooner and he accepted that. He said he would support me in anything I wanted to do. He understood my feelings and he is very happy for me. My Dad is 80 and my Mom passed away in March of this year. I didn't want to worry him. We had a bit of a cry and quite a few hugs. All in all it went very well. This is a great group. Thanks for your help and support.

Hi Marvy, I have 4 Optifast shakes per day which amounts to 900 calories. I'm on Day 3 and starting to feel less hungry. I have to do this for 3 weeks. Good luck on your journey

Good Morning, My bariatric team gave me a few choices but this is the number one choice. Celebrate - Essential Multi 2 in 1 Chewable (Multivitamin and Calcium) Orange/Pineapple I will take two a day Celebrate - Iron +C Chewable (Grape) 1 per day I haven't tasted them but I have heard from others in my area that they are good.

Thanks so much for all of your responses! They are helpful. I called the clinic and found out I can have sugar free jello...yay! But you all are correct in saying on the 3rd day it gets better. It is Day 3 for me and my appendages are still in tact (I haven't chewed anything off yet).

I believe in therapy and have used it whenever something comes up in my life that is hard (i.e losing my husband, closure of a large plant that I worked at and my Mom). Mother daughter relationships can be complicated and once you add addiction to the mix it gets downright hard. I highly suggest Al-Anon because of your Mom's addiction but I also think OA wouldn't hurt. Try a few meetings. I also think that food addiction is part of the reason I am the weight I am. One therapist said to me "If someone pushes your buttons......move your buttons" Whenever I was going through a particularly hard time with my Mother I distanced myself, not as a punishment for her but as survival mode for me. Through the years I discovered that my Mom had NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) and this helped tremendously. Although she was never diagnosed by a Doctor I worked with my Doctor to see how I could still love my Mom yet work on myself. Your work is your work and her work is her work and we are all at different levels of maturity (not age) but emotional maturity. Do your own work. Focus on yourself and hopefully you will be out of the house soon. When things get tough inside the house............go outside for a walk....go visit a friend...go walking with a friend. I wish you success on your journey

I'm pre-op but I heard about these from some friends in a local wls group. I ordered some for after surgery. I guess they are more like a Kool-aid consistency and they taste like candy! https://www.revolution-nutrition.com/product/isolate-splash/

Hi, I'm pre-op so no advice here lol. Just a question. Did you have trouble afterwards? Dumping?