The Greater Fool

Welcome, First, this is worth a call to your medical team. If it's nothing, let them tell you. The caring folks here and curmudgeons like me can share our experiences, give you encouragement, tell you what we did when we might of had a similar situation, but again, give your medical team a call. Now, having said that, is the itchy, red incision warm or hotter than the skin around it? Do you have a fever? Do you feel ill otherwise? If yes, definitely call your medical team. It could be an infection. Good luck, Tek

Welcome. While we can share our experiences, this sounds like something a call your medical team would like to get. It may be nothing or it may not. It may not even be related to your surgery. Good luck Tek

Go look at your pre-op pictures. Remember why you did this in the first place. Did you have a journal of any sort where you may have talked about how you felt back then? This may not actually help. I'm not sure anything any of us can say at this point will help. You don't remember why you had surgery 8 months ago yet want to get back on track? Those are amazingly contradictory ideas. If you don't know why you wanted to lose weight (aka 'motivation') why bother getting back on track? OK, how about: How do you feel about your weight now? If you're not unhappy with it then congratulations you are at your new goal. If you are unhappy about where you are but ambivalent about change, as it seems from your post, then you may have simply given up. Being unhappy and not caring is an obvious hint that you may be depressed. Get help of the professional variety. Talk to a therapist, now. Good luck, Tek

Glad to hear it. Your partitioned stomach needs to learn the new paradigm that it's not needed. You eat, it thinks it needs to get on the job. It will take a minute for it to learn it has no job. Good luck, Tek

These are actually pretty standard questions. The standard answers are pretty much you just had surgery. As long as you're not feeling pain, everything else can go either way. Hungry / not hungry, both are common. Rumbling / no rumbling, again common. Your plan at 1 week is purposely bland, gentle, and boring. Keep doing your plan. They key thing early on is to stay on plan, learn how to eat again. Staying on plan, following your rules, is the most important aspect of your surgery aside from your actual surgery. We got where we were by doing what we thought was right. It wasn't. The surgery changed your plumbing. Your plan changes your head. Stick with it. Good luck, Tek

Give a call to the Doc in the morning. Who knows what they encountered in surgery, so it may be totally expected or totally not. Either way, they are your medical team and the best source for information about you and what they did to you. While the kind hearted souls and curmudgeons like me want to share our experience and comfort, we are just voices in the dark. You had your innards messed with 4 days ago. You will have a lot of new sensations and experiences which will take time to learn and interpret. Fun times ahead for you. Enjoy the ride. Good luck, Tek

How did OMAD, or any other off-normal or crash diets, work for you pre-op? Did you lose? Did you maintain once you did? Return to your plan. Your normal, everyday, sustainable plan. Allow your plan, which is no doubt much healthier, do it's work. It may take longer, but it is sustainable and maintainable, and you will again re-establish good, healthy habits. Habits and health to take you through all your other challenges for the rest of your life. Good luck, Tek

Call your doc. Don't listen to idiots like me. Except when they say call your Doc. Pain is your body's way of getting attention. This is likely the result of a movement that pulled something inside, totally innocuous. Less likely, something is wrong. Good luck, Tek

Yes, bring it up with your Doc/Nut, and follow their plan. Following your plan, particularly early on, is where your success will come from. If your Doc/Nut say it's OK, as with most things, small bites, chew thoroughly, then chew more.

"That many a true word hath been spoke in jest." (James Joyce)

Hey, that's my shtick! Tek

I disagree with the first 1/3 of your post. As humans we project our experiences and feelings on what we see of others. I asked my wife about this idea that all marriages have abuse and she (and I) totally disagree. We also were up close viewers of our parents marriages and saw nothing close to abuse. Arguments? Boy howdy! But no abuse. The second 1/3 I don't disagree, but have a different take. In physics, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Marriages are not physics, but in some respects like a balance scale. When one side changes the other side must compensate in some way or the scale goes unbalanced. if or when we throw things out of balance we don't know what will happen on either side of the balance. We are often surprised what actually changes and where. The last 1/3. We are notoriously bad at predicting the future. All we can do now is express possibilities. Intentions are slightly better than predictions, but not by much. If we could predict the future accurately all those failed marriages would not have happened. They never did make long marriages. They only ever made marriages. People in the new ones working at them make them long.

Welcome back. Congratulations. Stay on plan. Tek

Welcome. Tek

This is perhaps the wrong forum, you're in the RNY forum. I can't imagine any google search could be better informed than those you've probably done. A 2 hour drive doesn't seem particularly excessive to me. Though, I've commuted that long in SoCal, so not sure I'm a judge. The Lap band forum here seems dead, so not much help there. Good luck, Tek

Not all guys are as open and eloquent as I am Generally, we're idiots. Most of us only have a theoretical idea of how women work. I think I was getting to a point, but I think I lost track... Hey NFL is back! Woohoo! See my other posts. Tek

If my wife approached me this way it would have resulted in a fight about how to properly communicate. Worst case, it would be interpreted as an ultimatum, and we are both proud enough to take the 'or else' option. Which is why we never come close to such. Insecurity is not something you can emotionally manipulate away, unless the goal is to get the insecure person to shut down. I suggest open, honest communication that treats your partner as an equal. Tek PS: I don't actually believe you speak to your partner this way, it was just internet bravado. Or so I hope.

Same with me back when. As bad off as I apparently was, they likely wrote it off as a lost cause. Good Luck, Tek

When my wife and I started walking we did New Balance and were quite content. I forget if we were pointed at a particular model or what but 17 years later it doesn't matter. She still insists on NB. After I decided I was going to continue running I switched to Nike Free. They are much lighter but less support. I've never worn anything else since. When I was doing 90 mile weeks then marathons, I went through a pair every 6 weeks. They are like being barefoot. Tek

I totally get your pain. I can't imagine. Perhaps more accurately, don't want to imagine. If you need to talk, find someone. If you can't find anyone, PM me and I will as often and long as you need. Personally, I accepted that I might die from surgery. The last thing my surgeon said before wheeling me in was "You know you might die in surgery? Do you want to continue?" It never occurred that I might writhe in agony for weeks before I did it. Something pre-ops should definitely ponder. I died during my bog-standard tonsillectomy when I was 4, and my abdomnioplasty when I was 45. Each time I hemorrhaged but I felt no pain. I'm even more thankful now thanks to your story. My thoughts are with you. Tek

I'm a guy, was married 27-28 years when I started toward surgery. My wife was like you, outgoing, social, etc. I am like your husband, introverted, insecure, a curmudgeon. Ok, here we go... I've heard it said "WLS makes good marriages better and bad marriages worse." My wife supported me 100%. But I initiated a similar discussion. Since I was always huge, I couldn't be sure that I wouldn't change. What if I did? We finally decided worrying about it doesn't and won't change anything. Worrying now (then) was wasted energy. I had no intention of allowing WLS to kill my marriage and we had to settle there. It wasn't just one discussion, we had it several times before and after surgery. Each time we reconfirmed our commitments to each other. Unless your husband is typically a jerk to you, I wouldn't count his insecurity against him. It's a fair concern. You both have issues and you love each other. But, once you remove your issues he fears he won't be good enough for the new you. Talk about it. Reassure him in no uncertain terms your feelings and intentions. Each time it comes up. Affirm your feelings toward him. If he is a total jerk, well surgery or not you have some thinking to do. My experience won't help you here. For the record, our marriage got better. My insecurities about the new me didn't blossom, but I'm still insecure. I am still me and I'm still in love with my wife more every day. She reports the same... but I think she's just being nice Good luck Tek

If you are completely following your program, as you seem to be, you are doing it right. Don't change a thing. The scale is lying to you. I should copy and paste. I was too large for any scale but my surgeons'. So I couldn't do to me what you are doing to you. Yet, in month 5 I only lost 8 pounds. Grrrr. My Doc couldn't care less about my weight if I was following my plan and feeling well. For the record, the next month I lost my second largest amount, and I didn't change a thing. I also don't ever weigh myself except at annual physicals. I do what Doc did: I measure how I feel, am I content, am I on program. You know, the important stuff. Numbers on a scale? Not important. There are a ton of things that can result in the scale not moving. By now, you've read about the ones both real and imagined. It doesn't matter. The scale doesn't matter. Don't let the scale do you. You do you. Tek

I suggest you talk to your Doc/Nut and ask what their exercise program for you would look like. If the gym is really your thing, talk to a trainer. I don't care for exercise for it's own sake. Never did it, never will. As such, I had no reason to research the 'optimal' approaches nor what happens to our bodies while doing it. It seems like MsMockie *HAS* done such research on gym type exercise. My advise to me was: Do what I like, as I won't sustain what I don't. I like walking around doing stuff. I thought being able to run 3 miles would be an interesting challenge. Then I started binge running. It wasn't about exercise, it was about enjoying what I was doing. Good luck. Tek

You are being pedantic. I, however, also messed with your premise. Sorry. Running a mile and walking a mile burn the same 100 (on average) calories. You just burn them a bit quicker the faster you move because you do the distance quicker. Where do those calories being burned come from? First, from any free calories that may be in your digestive system. Once those are unavailable, from fat. Once those become unavailable or your body can't access fat quick enough, muscle, bone, brain. Now that we agree on this, let's reason things out. You go to the gym, stretch, get on your cardio machine for 30 minutes. You totally rock out, 6.0 speed. Cool, you burned, on average, 300 calories. You burned what was available in your system for the last 12 hours. No fat burn. You must do this, what, about 7 times to lose a pound. Look: You were right. Woohoo! I, on the other hand, went outside. Time for a 15 mile run before work. 15 miles = about 1500 (on average) calories. Since i was eating less than 1200 a day, my body had to start converting fat. At some point in my longer runs, I also started converting muscle for energy, which became a problem. So yeah, I burned fat during running. Running on a treadmill is boring. The few times I had to do it I hated it. Running outside, around parks, golf courses, along the beach, listening to audio books, is both educational and fun. Enjoy Tek.

I've got you by a few years still. Get off my lawn! Tek