The Greater Fool

Perhaps you should reread. I clearly stated that had you not been so clear that you were being helpful, it would have been easy to misinterpret what you wrote. I even THANKED you for being so clear. Sometimes you can't win with some folks. Good luck, Tek

Written communication doesn't have the benefit of additional key elements of communication such as tone, inflection and body language that typically inform the intent of the speaker. Thus, it is reasonable that when speaking of possibly sensitive issues in written communication it is wise to state clearly what is and is not the intent. Unlike some people, I like try to work on the principle of charity which is to assume you actually ARE trying to be helpful while your words actually make you seem like a back-biting shrew. Thank you for clarifying your position so clearly. Good luck, Tek

Makes sense. As I understand stereotypes, guys tend to be "fix-it" sorts and women tend to be "express-it" sorts. Of course, stereotypes don't always pan out, but for me it's pretty much spot on, if not a bit weak. I tend to hear complaint's as pleas for help. Add to that my personal issues of being a programmer, for which virtually every statement of fact is a requirement for a fix. And my severe OCD which all this amped up to completely irrationally and annoying to anyone in my vicinity. Even as I express my understanding that not every complaint is a plea for a solution I feel compelled to jump on every last thing as a demand for a fix. Imagine the joy of being me, and the special joy of being married to me. For those that have expressed relationship complications, feel free to private message me as I have an individual action plan for every comment made in passing that has ever been posted here. I can even help with your grammar and punctuation. I hope everyone can solve every last problem that doesn't require a fix. Good luck, Tek

Perhaps y'all can help me understand. The complaints (they are complaints, right?) seem to indicate you are unhappy with the way things are. Yet, the complaints seem to have been going on this way for years. If all the complaining is serious and you are really this unhappy for this many years, what is the point of the continued complaining? After all, your spouses are ignoring your complaining. Yet, here you are. Are you actually unhappy or is this complaining all in good fun? If all the complaining is all in good fun, but you are actually satisfied with the way things are, what is the perk? Why? Is this just a game you play? Help me understand. Of course, I don't intend offense. I'm not judging by any stretch. Good luck, Tek

I would be most concerned about shortness of breath and is something I would get in to see a doctor about as soon as I could. Good luck, Tek

Anytime you have skin rubbing against skin a rash is possible. Once irritated, fungus, yeast, and/or bacteria can add additional rash fodder rather quickly as such things love open irritations or sores. Things to do: Keep the area clean: Wash the area with soap and water frequently; Keep the area dry: After washing dry the area thoroughly, Powder the area: Baby powder, something like Gold Bond or Gold Bond Medicated, or anti-fungal powder (see next item); Address a possible fungus: Apply anti-fungal cream or powder. Athletes foot products will work if you can't find anything clearly labelled 'anti-fungal', as it is the same fungus; Hydrocortisone can help but it won't fix fungus; Make sure any creams, ointments, or lotions you use absorb to dry quickly, or it just becomes another irritant; If all else fails, you may need a prescription anti-fungal, anti-bacterial, or anti-whatever that you Doc can address better than us strangers on the internet; Good luck, Tek

Interesting times ahead. Good luck, Tek

Ignore the number on the scale. What's important is how you feel about where you are. If you absolutely must lose those 10 pounds, and keep those 10 pounds off, get comfortable with dieting for the rest of your life. Sounds horrible to me, but lucky for you, you're not me. If you find you are happy and comfortable where you are, welcome to your new goal. Congratulations. You still need to eat and drink mindfully but it doesn't need to rule your life the way weight loss diets do. Go off and enjoy your life. Those numbers we have in our heads are crazy makers. Yes, you were at your best when you weighed that wonderful weight when you were younger. That's the weight you want. But your body has changed. You now have a larger frame which dieting won't change. That larger frame requires more muscle to move around that dieting wont change. If you get to that perfect number you will not look or feel like you think you will. Whatever path you choose, make sure it's what you-now want, not what you-then wanted. You-then was young and stupid. You-now are experienced and wiser. Good luck, Tek

This would be a good reason to get some professional help in the form of a therapist. Therapists can teach you coping techniques for your fears. Good luck, Tek

No. Surgeons have different drug protocols just as they have different diets, and different every other darned thing. If you need a PPI, he'll give you one then. Good luck, Tek

Go the the ER. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Now. Good luck, Tek

I had my abdominoplasty at UCLA. Don't remember the surgeon (who didn't do WLS). Staff seemed friendly and efficient 15(ish) years ago. Doesn't help much, does it. Good luck, Tek

Your medical team's answer, actually, is the only answer that matters. What we say, as you know, strangers on the internet, should not matter to you at all. But, you do you, I guess. Good luck, Tek

I could not weigh at home for about the first 2.5(ish) years, so that would certainly kill some of you. Once I could, I did it for a couple weeks until I drove myself crazy (not a far trip), then gave it up. Once I stopped my monthly follow-ups, I didn't weigh between annual doctor visits. Still don't. The scale no longer has power over me. I guess when you go through a couple/three years of only weighing monthly you learn it's not the end of the world not to know your EXACT weight. Just keep following your plan, then rest happens on it's own. Oh. Scales lie. There! Good luck, Tek

It's normal. If you didn't lose weight for another couple weeks it would still be normal. Get off the scale, it doesn't make you lose weight faster. See? I didn't do the "scales lie" routine. I can change! Good luck, Tek

This is called "grazing." If we sit and eat a bite of food when room for a bite of food opens up, we can eat quite a bit of food. Change it to include less than appropriate choices (not actually necessary, though) and we can easily get back up to our pre-op weights and more. It is also called "defeating your surgery." Don't do it. Follow the rules, and get up from the table when your rules say to. Don't build on the bad habit. You can do it, you've done it mostly for this long. Good luck, Tek

You can puree virtually anything. Thai Chicken as a favorite, Chicken Alfredo (sans Fettuccini), even did Mongolian BBQ. Pulled pork. Any protein you like, with a whatever little sauce you like for moisture, along with a veggie you like, just pureed. I was eating like a king, if a king ate 2-3 ounces of good food without chewing. Things like mashed potatoes were not in my program, nor were typical refried beans (too much fat, I learned later they make me dump anyhow). Focus on protein first, then veggies. Puree is easy! Good luck, Tek

If you have chronic pain, I would (and did) get myself to a pain management specialist. There are all kinds of new therapies for chronic pain and pain management stays on top of them. I swear by them. Good luck, Tek

I have it on good authority that scales lie. It must be true since I hear myself saying it all the time! Smart scales just have more to lie about. Minimally more to obsess about. Good luck, Tek

As usual, some people who hit the average swear by it, those that don't ridicule it. I hope EVERYONE draws the appropriate message. If it's not clear, statistics are crap. Here is the truth: A certain percentage (50-60%) hit average loss which is also 70-80% of goal. If you hit that and are happy, more power to you. [ETA: When I started, at my weight, I would have killed to hit average. I would have been fine.] If you're not happy with that, the averages need not have power over you. I lost goal and past goal, through little fault of my own, other than binge running. Anyone, through ridiculous acts or normal behavior can beat the averages. Statistics are lies. HUGE lies. I could post my statistics. Yeah, I have them. But I know they are mine, only mine. And may make a lot of people feel like crap: For 2 reasons: 1) I weighed more that most people here, so my monthly losses seem crazy, not so much for me as others (starting higher and lower) beat me. 2nd, I shot past goal because I was running 90+ miles a week. I couldn't eat enough to stop losing weight. What good does it do anyone here to know? None. Do you. No one here lives you. You may lose little or a lot, I think it's a crap shoot. Just don't compare, that is a losing game. Good luck, Tek

There are lies, damned lies, and statistics. You lose at your unique rate. Comparing to others, not matter how great yours are, are disappointing. Good luck, Tek

Any day now... Good luck, Tek

huh. My surgeon said it was because the risk of swallowing it was just too great, however small each patient thinks it may be. Our pouches / new stomachs are the perfect size for a piece of gum to muck it up. And unlike actual food, it doesn't dissolve. When you have to stick a grabber down someone's throat almost weekly, you tell your other patients "just don't chew gum." Good luck, Tek

Well that certainly is making bad situation great. There was a time when I wanted to go to school for my avocation but could never get more than a semester before a new project came up that demanded all my time. I'm too tired now Again, congratulations. Good luck, Tek

Congratulations on your success. Our stories aren't dramatically different. Dammit, I'm still working. Good luck, Tek