kelly Lake

I'm EXTREMELY nervous about beginning to date again. I'm 48 now, 5 ft 4". I have one child 24 yrs old that lives with me as well as My amazing 80 yr old Mother. I am bisexual, I don't smoke & rarely drink (only a teeny amt & only on very, very special occasions). I married the wrong guy, back in 2009, Divorced in 2017 & due to my severe back issues I had R&Y on Aug 24th 2020. I've struggled with my weight throughout my life, reaching my heaviest in May 2020 at 313, I weigh 196 now, I'm VERY proudofmyself (insert high five). I have approx 30-40 lbs left to reach my tentative goal of 155-165. I honestly just don't know where to start with dating again, I used to be soooo great with dating etc and had tons of confidence but now I'm going through all these changes with the weightloss process. Plus my thinning & graying hair, YES apparently increased "graying" is a possibility after wls ugh lol.. I'm also in the process of waiting to get my final upper denture plate as You can't get the final fitting while losing weight, it was news to me that you lose weight in your gums too! So that definitely puts the pause button in effect for me where dating is concerned. I also don't want to sound 😕 discriminatory by saying this but I don't want to date anyone of any significant overweight status, low activity levels or crappy eating as a habit. These are all simply triggers for me as a recovering binge eater so I wouldn't want to invite that into my future. I need to date someone who will encourage my more active lifestyle, share these activities with Me & enjoy getting/being as healthy as possible throughout our lives. I was dying & basically immobile a year ago, I have 3 spinal diseases so the 115 lbs I've lost so far was definitely killing me in more ways than one. I never want to go back to that life & maintaining my healthy lifestyle is key to keeping my mobility and the much improved mental health that goes with it. I just don't feel the confidence yet or quite know where to start lol. Annapolis Md is a busy but beautiful and diverse city so there's lots of amazing single ppl here, I'm just not sure where to begin or when to begin either lol.. Thank you for reading my story. - I don't have any "new" before/after body pics to share so here's an older one comparing 313 & 216 AND a brand new one of my hands at 313 & 196. Lol Kelly H.

I had my Gastric Bypass Surgery and Galbladder removal on Aug 24th 2020, just almost 20 weeks ago. I have lost 68 lbs since Surgery and 88 lbs since my heaviest weight in May of 313, Im about 224.4 now. Everything is going along pretty textbook except for 1 thing. I have horrible Aching Continuous Pain in my legs (especially my left leg, outer thigh close to the side of the knee and a lil in the outer calf sometimes. It's not fatigue and I get plenty of all my vitamins and supplements plus I eat a high protein, nutrient rich diet and add electrolites to my 64+ oz of fluids each day. I am having Telemedicine appts with my Surgeon and my Nutritionist today thankfully and I plan to consult them on this but have any of you experienced this? Tylenol muscel creams and some stretching usually helps but I have had nights where they just didn't cut it and it felt like my bones were on fire! I definitely cannot continue to endure this nightly as I have for the last few weeks. I understand that a large quick weightloss can change your gate and how your body carries the weight causing nerves, tendons and muscles to respond this way but Jesus It's awful and it quickly goes away if I get up and walk around. It starts promptly with lying down in bed and persists regardless of position. I have chronic severe back issues that began about 12 yrs ago, My pain & loss of mobility along with weight gain topping me off at 313 lbs (I'm 5 ft. 3") got so severe that I had 7 back surgeries in a 3 yr period that ALL failed. DDD Degenerative Disc Disease, Spinal Stenosis and a some herniated discs prompted my Back Surgeons to declare me officially inoperable, so they along with my Primary Dr. & Counselors recommend I have Bariatric weight loss syrgery & I'm so glad I did! Its very frustrating for Me now tho to have regained about 80% of my mobility and reduced the regular daily & constant pain in my back by about 60% so far only to have this awful pain in my legs at night every freakin night now. I'm losing sleep nightly causing me to be tired all day, get less done, not exercise, be easily irritated in the day, agitated and frustrated. I NEED this to go away and I cannot take any opioid pain meds outside of the required serious post op situations. I am in long term recovery from a physical addiction to pain meds caused by an over prescribing horrible Pain mngmt Dr. Side note: That Pain mngmt Dr. is No longer allowed to practice medicine. Any shared experiences and info is much appreciated 🙏

Lol oh no, it was too broad and deep of an ache and pain. Felt like growing pains, like when your legs ache from fatigue but x 1000 and its all over. The extra iron I began taking fixed it in 2 days its almost completely gone now. Barely noticeable

Thanks, Yours is probably your gate shifting, that is very common for sleeve patients and bypass too but vitamins may be part too. I just had to up my iron and take all at once in the afternoon

Mine is 90% better and mine was Iron, I had to up my iron to 60 to 65 mg a day minimum.

Yes, many different ones including $3000 hospital grade down to the cheap $35 one insuranceprovides for at home use, ithe all only gave a few hrs of relief thats why i had 7 surgeries and they all failed tgen gastric bypass which getting weight off it is the only thing to decrease my pain at all and increase my mobility and stamina.

I have accepted tgat my future eating habits will never look anything like my old eating and tgats how I got to 313 in the first place. Tge surgery really is just 1 tool to help you reach your weightloss goals. I don't eat a lot of carbs at all, less than 60-65 grams a day 70-75 if I exercise that day. I don't really do keto as we can't have all that high fat and its not healthy long term. I just find creative ways to satisfy my favorite food cravings and whatever I "think" I can eat I put half that on my plate. If you eat sugary starchy foods more & more gradually on the regular you will decrease the amt that tgey bother you or cause dumping thus making it easier to incorporate them daily and putting weight back on. I lose 2.7 lbs a week on avg on about 600-800 cal a day but my day is mostly Protien then veggies with healthy fats and a small amt of fruits and carbs. I have been speaking with a councelor ev 2 weeks and my Nutritionist every month to make sure I stay focused, satisfied and don't make the wrong choices destroying my chances of success. Snacking is my biggest issue, Sugar free candies, Skinny Pop corn, popsicles, beef jerky, cheese sticks etc. I had to get all snacks out of my room, car and severely limit the amt I buy myself. I can easily stall if I snack on the wrong foods.. I had an eating disorder in my 20s and I had to totally rebuild my relationship with food, its still hard but being disabled and in pain daily was harder.

313 was my top weight, 307 on my first appt with the Surgeon in Dec 2019 and I was 293 on my surgery day Aug 24th, I'm only 5 ft 3 5" had a Bmi of like 53 and a waist of 59 inches, My waist now (20 weeks later is 41 inches). I chose the R&Y because I wanted the most restrictions and requirements possible, the extra accountability that comes with the stricter reginine of supplements for life, low fat and no sugar. Dumping syndrome is AWFUL!! its nausea, the cold sweats, upset stomach etc like a sudden flu that happens in minutes. It happens if u have too much sugar, Fat or just too much food in your stomach, especially with fluid and then it goes through faster than it should. The 30/30 rule is for real! I also felt in all my research and my surgeon agreed that my GERD (acid Reflux) and my EOE Eociniphilic Esophogitus (Spontaneous regurgitating) would both be better with the R&Y. Gerd can get worse with the sleeve. They were right and my Gerd is gone and I no longer need meds for it either. I'm down 68 lbs since surgery and I'm 100% confident I made the right choice for me. I also Didn't want to go through a revision of sleeve to Bypass if it didn't work well enough for me. I have lost and gained 100 lbs multiple times in my life and I never wanna go through it again. I need the stricter food guidelines for my progress, the accountability and responsibility keeps me on track. Not 1 item with real sugar in it since 2 weeks before surgery. Fruit is my only real sugar and I am careful to eat very small portions of low sugar fruits like berries and some green apple. I put pyure sugar sub on things that need it but thats rare as things do taste sweeter. You really have to make the decision that's best for your individual wants, needs and preferences. I had a lot of pain post op, I did have my Galbladder out too tho so I have 9 incision scars instead of the 5 most ppl have. It took a few hours for the nurses to get my pain under control and I had some pain for first few weeks at home. Then suddenly it was gone. I also rejected no less that 2 dissolving stitches from 5 of my incisions, this has happened to me before with other surgeries. I would do it all over again tho.

Message me anytime, I care for my Mom so if I don't get right back to you I will as soon as I am able

Thankfully He & my other surgeon both agree I don't have any of the supporting symptoms that would indicate a clot. I had an appt with my Dr today. Its likely my gate shifting from an 88 lb loss in 8 months, 68 lbs since Aug 24th along with some possible deficit in one or more of my vitamins. If the bloodwork doesn't show any deficit I will be assessed for restless leg but its likely the muscles readjusting to my walking pattern and activity levels.

Definitely not my back, I've lost huge amounts of weight in the past with these back issues but today I spoke to my Dr. Hes going to look at my new bloodwork this week but based on my supplement intake and symptoms he suspects its my muscles shifting due to the fast loss of 86 lbs or it could be restless leg syndrome. I won't know for sure til after my bloodwork comes back and I see my primary. Ugh.. For now my heating pad and tylenol are my best friends lol

Congrats on your upcoming surgery, I had Bypass on Aug 24th. I don't care for milk but the premier protien shakes are pretty good. The Banana, Caramel, Strawberry, Blueberry and Cookies & Cream are the best in my opinion plus you only need them for about a month then youll be eating mostly regular soft foods then solids gradually. You'll do great 👍

I did A LOT of research on this and I found my best option was R&Y & Im so glad I did it. I wanted the extra restrictive requirements, responsibilities and accountability for attention to my diet requirements. It's quite a commitment either way, a lifelong change to better your health. However R&Y route is a bit more intricate and to go that route does require some discipline and commitments like the taking of supplements for the rest of your life, I don't mind because they don't bother me and I've found affordable ones I like. I lose about 2.7 lbs a week and I have very little that I cannot eat, real sugar and snacking are my 2 nono's.. Dumping syndrome is no joke and makes you feel quite crappy, like the flu but worse and verry sudden, so the knowledge that if you eat too much, too fast, drink with food or the wrong foods you'll feel like absolute crap keeps me in line and accountable as well. I seem to see a lot more ppl getting revisions these days too that had Sleeve vs R&Y (In my opinion) so its really about looking honestly at your personal relationship with food, discipline level and weighing out the pros and cons of each procedure for you Personally. Msg me anytime!

Its important to measure out your food and I honestly never felt a lot of restriction with soft foods. I did however experience the nausea and cold sweats of dumping syndrome if I was eating too much at one time, the softer thinner the food the easier it will flow through the stomach quicker and cause you issues. Just use a measuring instrument and follow the recommended guidelines for starting out. I found thicker protien oatmeals, scrambled eggs mashed up, mashed cauliflower, greek yogurt with some pureed berries in it, pureed tuna fish and chicken salad things like that helped me recognize when my tummy was nearing its full mark better than the thinner soft foods did. Now I had R&Y tho not sleeve so I may have a bit smaller area to work with but message me anytime if you have any questions or jus wanna talk to a fellow gastric patient

Congrats on Bariatric Surgery! I had my Gastric Bypass Surgery and Galbladder removal on Aug 24 2020 and honestly I was discouraged by my initial weightloss because I was comparing my losses to others. I was told to set reasonable obtainable goals for myself to start off and to focus those goals around fluids and protien and never the scale. I am at almost 20 weeks post op and I've lost about 68 lbs so far, 88 lbs since May. I was reminded by my surgeon tbat everyone gained tgeir weight differently so We should expect to lose it differently. I am proud of every singke pound I lose and I have also had weeks where I lost nothing. I will say snacking was the culprit there! Lol.. Just focus on the actions you can control, simple healthy guidelines and see how your body responds to them. No more than once a week weigh ins are best I know my weight can fluctuate due to salt, hormones, time of tge month etc so I don't weigh on my cycle and I shoot for every Sunday evening as a guideline. Message me anytime for anything!!

I purchased 6 of the same item this week. I received an email telling me they only had 4 not 6 so I said fine send me tge 4 and refund the difference. I then received only 2 and emailed them back to hear oh sorry we only had 2. I told them I felt that with the repeated mistakes they should refund the money for the missing 2 and send me another flavore at no charge. In my next email reply I wasn't even given the option to just choose the other flavor for the money I already paid, nope they just refunded my money. I have also found that the majority of the products here are available elsewhere cheaper especially on amazon prime. I will never buy another item from BP and I won't renew my subscription box either. Horrible customer service seriously BP do better!!

I am 9 weeks post op R&Y And I say no worries on the hair I have super thick individually fine hair too so Except for the hairline I'm not really worried about it. With lockdown looming again you hopefully can just be home relaxing losing weight I also got a recommendation from my girlfriend who is a hair guru and owns her own salon, don't wash your hair a lot, once a week if possible is sufficient, ALWAYS take your biotin and an additional hair skin nail vitamin if you can get one, Use gentle shampoo and conditioner and no styling products or tools. Our hair follicles are going into a resting phase due to the shocking traumatic event of surgery and the changes in our diet which is also traumatic to our bodies. Giving your scalp a much needed rest after your bodies traumatic surgery will allow the follicles to rest and recover quicker. Hope that helps!

I also wanted to say I can only drink the premier protien shakes, chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, Blueberry and apple cinnamon. I like them because they aren't slimy, chalky, chunky or too sweet. If you have not found the ones you like keep looking AND when you begin solid foods get lots of high protien meats if you're not a vegetarian that is! I do a lot of lemon pepper cod, I hate canned tuna so I make tuna fish with light mayo, celery seed and relish juice from tuna steaks! I eat my protien first and I just try to make it a priority on my plate. I can only eat about 3-4 oz of food at a time so it makes cooking the better quality more expensive food options go a longer way in my freezer or fridge making options for better quality foods more available in my budget

I can tell you what my Dr told me at that phase I had the same trouble, he said not to worry about that, to get the protien shakes in that I can even comfortably. If its just a half or 1 no prob! but don't fret about it The most important thing in the first 4 weeks is FLUID FLUID FLUID & make sure to take your supplements ♡ Congrats on surgery! I had G-Bypass and gallbladder out on August 24th, 313 is my heaviest weight, 307 on start of program, 293 on surgery day and I'm now 250 (43 lbs post surgery loss) at 9 weeks out.. You shouldn't stress and if you have any questions at all your 1st line should be your mychart to ask the dr. There are no small questions. We're all here to offer answers on general stuff but I do recommend asking your dr too.

I think this may sound super simple BUT my best advice for you is to go back to the basics, Nobody says you have to have any particular food for breakfast. I would just start looking up recipies and meal ideas for postop gastric patients and begin there. Decide on the types of desires you have in the morning, salty, crunchy, sweet, savory whatever it is and try to fill that with new recipie ideas to try. I think its important not to put ourselves in a tiny box where food is concerned. The main reason for a lot of weight stalls and failures with wls is boredom with food choices, feeling like were deprived and in food jail. My counselor (Im a food addict) says to start with what Im craving, then find the healthy alternative to that food that fits into my dietary needs and goals. I think once you're introducing new healthy recipies keeping with your portion guidelines your will see the scale moving again too. I have a lifetime of experience at losing more weight when I eat healthier foods more often throughout the day 4 tiny meals than I did by starving myself and eating once a day what tasted like cardboard. We have to enjoy the flavors in our foods in order for this to work for us, I know that already at 8 days postop lol. I have a pile of recipies I cannot wait to try once I'm allowed! For now I get creative with different broths and gastric protien soups & drinks. Best wishes! Don't let it get you down! This is an easy problem to fix!

Im 8 days postop & I know my appetite is 100% mental, I am trying to watch things on streaming tv that don't involve food or ppl eating lol. It only takes one stupid food commercial and I'm sadly missing my old friend the grub hub app (which I deleted two weeks before surgery) lol. I can only tell you what my counselor told me, to ask ppl NOT to order delivery food, if they do eat something you would normally want to do it in another room, I am lucky enough to have my entire family of 3 other adults trying to get healthier currently too and eating healthy foods but still not around me lol. I don't wanna even see solid food yet. I have a large food addiction, not to overeating portions so much but to eating really unhealthy foods 4 to 6 times a day. When I broke my back 4 yrs ago I lost a lot of mobility and began eating for comfort and boredom to the tune of 100 lbs gained. I have battled my weight my entire life with huge losses of over 120 lbs multiple times. At 47 with such pain & decreased mobility surgery was the recommendation of my back surgeon as my back is inoperable. I wish you the best of luck, & you'll know if your hunger is mental, just see how physically hungry you feel just after waking up when you know your stomach is empty vs 15 min later after you drink something with protien in it. PS the protien will help you feel fuller longer & helps stop the cravings too

My bypass & gallbladder out were on Aug. 24th & I see my Dr for follow up today 8 days postop to start phase 2. My Dr. Is really conservative about what goes in the stomach in the first week so I havn't had anything other than water for first 2 days then at home Gatorade zero, no sodium beef broth, protienO2 waters & a lil sugar free jello. Today I will start adding 2-3 protien shakes each day for 1 week. Then after that some mushy watery soups & sugar free pudding etc. Dr. Gandsas goes pretty slowly with reintroduction of foods. I don't mind tho, its honestly helping me face down some of my food demons within my food addiction. I have been scanning the internet for yummy interesting gastric recipies to focus on and look forward to instead of just thinking about how many months it will take to train my body not to dump if I eat my favorite ice cream lol. I spoke with my counselor about it and she agrees this approach is better for me to go super slowly and see some rewards from this surgery before I begin eating solids again too. So in 8 days I've lost 13 lbs and THAT makes me very happy 😊 I hope you're also doing well postop! Heres to Geenie & my new Tummy who's name remains to be decided lol

I am 1 week postop from R&Y today. I had a lot of pain after surgery. I was 293 on Aug 24 and this morning Day 7 I am 282 so 11 lbs down so far.

I am 1 week postop Gastric Bypass & Gallbladder removal. I was in the hospital 2 nights, The first 24 hrs were extremely painful for me. I had to basically beg for enough pain meds and drinking wasn't really a factor til day 2. I pushed myself to walk as often and as dmfar as possible to get the gas moving. Once the gas began moving the pain became much less. I'm drinking fine at home, My Dr. Says Clear fluids for the whole first week. Followup is Tomorrow when I can begin supplements and protien shakes. Ive had a cesarean with my son & a lot of other surgeries but never had pain like I did with this surgery. Because I had my gallbladder out too I had 9 incisions and one for the drain. Highest weight was 313, I was 293 lbs on Surgery day 8/24 & this morning day 6 postop I weigh 282 so an 11 lb weightloss for week 1 which does make me happy. I feel ok but feel I have to be very careful not to eat or drink more than 1.5 oz in a 15 min period.