blackcatsandbaddecisions

I definitely have experienced this. At first I found myself substituting shopping for eating (easy to do, having lost so much weight). Then I realized I was doing that and took a step back. Now when I feel that craving (whether for food or to buy something) I stop and ask myself why? What's going on that I am trying to assuage or pacify? Not long ago, I really wanted a cookie and when I stopped to ask myself why, I realized that I had just come out of a meeting that did not go as well as I had hoped. I felt disappointed, embarrassed, upset. And I wanted a cookie. Once I realized what was at the root of my craving, I was able to redirect those feelings. I got a cup of coffee instead. It was warm and sweet and about 200 fewer calories than the cookie. And I took it and went and sat around the backside of the building where it was quiet and peaceful (being an introvert, that was comforting to me). I thought through what had happened and what to do next as I drank my coffee. And 30 minutes later I was good to go. Every situation is different, but I'm getting better at asking myself "What's going on? Why do you want that?"

My greatest fear is that I will not be successful. Or that I will lose all the weight but as soon as the hunger hormones come back I will gain it all back. 2nd is that I will have a bunch of extra skin and hate my body.

jaelzion, those were also my fears. Fear that I could end up with a permanent colostomy from complications, or failure. I had two family members who talked me out of surgery twice. But I decided they probably didn’t understand much about it. As I got older I began to have heart problems. So this time it’s a GO! I want to live!

Now that I've gone through the surgery and recovery, I can now move on to the other things that I control - weight regain. But I feel, and I'm only a few months post-op, that I have learned enough about this process/journey that I will be able to control weight regain.
The surgical team did their job. The dieticians have provided me the information to get me to where I am, now it is only up to me. The support of this community is another tool available in my toolbox that I intend to utilize.

It makes sense that people who lose weight before surgery lose less weight after surgery -- simply because they have less to lose if they've already lost some! But I certainly wouldn't take that as a recommendation not to lose weight before surgery.
I lost about 70 pounds in the 5 months before my surgery. My highest recorded weight was ~340 pounds and I was ~270 the day of surgery. I'm ~150 now (so I've lost ~120 pounds after surgery). So let's say I hadn't lost any weight before surgery and went into surgery at 340 pounds. Maybe I would have lost 150 pounds by now instead of only 120. That would put me at 190 pounds. So I am glad I got a head start on my weight loss before surgery.
Keep in mind that the heavier you are, the easier it is to lose each pound. At 340 pounds, it was not difficult for me to lose 10 pounds. At 150 pounds, losing 10 pounds is a major challenge. If you wait until after surgery to start losing weight, your results will be more dramatic because that "easy" weight will be melting off in the beginning. I suppose that could be a benefit because the early post-op stages can be rough and the quick weight loss can keep you motivated. But you will still eventually reach a point where the weight loss slows down. It will just be later than it would be if you lost some of the weight before surgery.
In addition to getting a head start on weight loss, I think it was good for me to lose weight before surgery because I started getting into some healthier habits before surgery. I think it's extremely important to log everything you eat (I use MyFitnessPal, but there are other apps that do the same thing), and I've been doing that since 5 months before my surgery. By the time I had surgery, it was already a habit. I had also started to make healthier food choices before surgery, which made it easier to eat healthy foods when I transitioned to solid foods after surgery (also easier to avoid high-fat, high-sugar foods that could cause dumping syndrome after surgery, since I had already reduced my intake of that stuff before surgery).
By the way, the lower your weight before surgery, the lower your maintenance weight is likely to be (and the sooner you'll get there), so I'd consider that to be a pretty good argument for losing weight before surgery.

Surgery was the best medical decision I ever made! I just wish I had done it 5 years sooner!!
It's embarrassing to admit how much I was obsessed with food prior to surgery. I was at a fast food drive thru at least once a day, if not twice a day. Parties were more about the food than they were about the people. Vacations were planned around what restaurants we would we go to.
Not only do I have a brand new body, but I have a brand new mind! Now that I'm not thinking about food all of the time, I have this mental clarity that allows me to think about things that truly matter. I'm a better mother, better wife, and better friend.
I truly love myself -- both inside and out!!!

Yes you're right this sucks big time. My surgery was originally scheduled for March 2020 And I live in a great state of stupidville California where somebody hiccups and they shut the whole state down. Anyway I had to wait a year for my surgery date ultimately ended up being 3-18-21. A year after my original schedule date and one month exactly after my mother died of covid. That encouraged me big time because my mom's weight was so high they couldn't turn her over. Her suffering was so bad before we lost her. So I understand about the need for covid shutdowns and I understand the devastation of having this necessary surgery postponed. But everyone here is right saying stick to your guns and to the tools that you've learned. You can take off some additional weight before your surgery. Be even healthier for it, and your outcome can be good and you'll heal really well and fast. Time goes by no matter what we do. So let's make the best of the time that we have.

I somehow missed this thread when it was first started. I just found it and enjoyed reading everyone's NSVs! I have a lot of similar ones, but here are a few of mine:
I used to have to keep the steering wheel in my car raised to make room for my belly, and it blocked my view of the clock and temperature. Now I can put it low enough to see the whole dashboard. The other day, I climbed 12 flights of stairs like it was nothing. Didn't even have to stop for a break. Amazing how easy it is without carrying a whole extra person! I used to leave a lot of extra time when going to work, meetings, etc. because walking to another building or up stairs would leave me sweaty. I used to carry around a fan and small towel so I could cool off/dry off after getting sweaty. I also liked to be super early to meetings to make sure I wouldn't have to squeeze behind someone to get to a chair. Now I can just get there on time like a normal person and not worry about any of that. I was taking a walk recently (which is crazy in itself -- I never used to just go outside and take a walk!) and I had to move off the road while a car passed, and I tripped and fell in the grass. When I was 300+ pounds, a fall like that would have hurt and it would have been hard to get up. This time, I just jumped right back up like it was nothing. I no longer dread meeting people in person for the first time as I used to when I knew they would think less of me once they found out how fat I was.

Not tripping or falling down because I can see the floor better. My belly was blocking the view of my feet. 😂

NSV's:
No more blood pressure medication
Economy class airline seats aren't that small anymore

I got a small strainer that was a godsend early surgery. I bought so many Soups and strained them through that thing! Bought it at Walmart for like 1.50 and it was my best purchase.

I got a small strainer that was a godsend early surgery. I bought so many Soups and strained them through that thing! Bought it at Walmart for like 1.50 and it was my best purchase.

I was just thinking about this thread the other day. Reporting back almost six months post surgery to say,
1. I didn’t die! Obviously.
2. I didn’t have any complications. Easy recovery, feel totally normal now but just get full super quickly.
3. It is working and I have 120 lbs of missing fat to show that’s true.
4. Insurance approved! Best advice is to find the requirements and make that your exact goal. Insurance wants you to drop out, so stick it to them and make em pay!
5. Regain will always be a fear, but I’ve grown more confident that I can use this tool to control my regain down the road. No matter how you lose weight, keeping it off will be a lifelong struggle.

Basically I just wanted to check back in because I keep reading threads about people presurgery who are scared and have a lot of fears. It’s totally normal to have a ton of fear but please know that for the vast majority of us, it all ends up fine in the end.

I’ll admit, I was in some pain for the first 2 days. After that, it was basically nothing. I have so much liquid codeine left it is ridiculous. I need to find a place to dispose of it but I’ve not bothered yet.

Things I found more painful than surgery:
1. Infected tooth
2. Ingrown toenail
3. Sitting in a chair for a few hours with arms that cut into my fat hips like 6 inches while trying to pretend to enjoy time with friends. Really just spending the time in pain and hating myself.

Ok the last one was mostly emotional pain. But still. :)

I was just thinking about this thread the other day. Reporting back almost six months post surgery to say,
1. I didn’t die! Obviously.
2. I didn’t have any complications. Easy recovery, feel totally normal now but just get full super quickly.
3. It is working and I have 120 lbs of missing fat to show that’s true.
4. Insurance approved! Best advice is to find the requirements and make that your exact goal. Insurance wants you to drop out, so stick it to them and make em pay!
5. Regain will always be a fear, but I’ve grown more confident that I can use this tool to control my regain down the road. No matter how you lose weight, keeping it off will be a lifelong struggle.

Basically I just wanted to check back in because I keep reading threads about people presurgery who are scared and have a lot of fears. It’s totally normal to have a ton of fear but please know that for the vast majority of us, it all ends up fine in the end.

My coworker that is almost 8 years post sleeve told me that this is the easiest diet she ever went on. And for me I’d say my experience has been very similar. A bit of struggle at the beginning, but I feel like I am finally free from endless and all consuming hunger and cravings. I’ve been on so many diets and this is the easiest and best one ever.

And screw the people who say it’s the easy way out- so what if it is? How much suffering do you think that a fat person deserves to have in order to lose weight? Do we have to serve a certain amount of penance to make society happy? Unless they are weaving their own cloth for clothes and using a washing board at the creek out back, I’m pretty sure they are taking the “easy way out” in a lot of their life.

I was just thinking about this thread the other day. Reporting back almost six months post surgery to say,
1. I didn’t die! Obviously.
2. I didn’t have any complications. Easy recovery, feel totally normal now but just get full super quickly.
3. It is working and I have 120 lbs of missing fat to show that’s true.
4. Insurance approved! Best advice is to find the requirements and make that your exact goal. Insurance wants you to drop out, so stick it to them and make em pay!
5. Regain will always be a fear, but I’ve grown more confident that I can use this tool to control my regain down the road. No matter how you lose weight, keeping it off will be a lifelong struggle.

Basically I just wanted to check back in because I keep reading threads about people presurgery who are scared and have a lot of fears. It’s totally normal to have a ton of fear but please know that for the vast majority of us, it all ends up fine in the end.

Billho and Newyork lady, you guys are 100% in line with everything I’ve thought. It’s hard when you know that you are going to undertake surgery for something that is technically “fixable” without it...and yet evidence shows that it generally won’t be fixed without surgery. I’ve had a lot of stress over the fact that I did this to myself.

One thing I’ve tried to tell myself is that a lot of medical conditions are self inflicted, but those people deserve to have their conditions treated and receive medical care regardless. Some cancers, accidents, etc are very self inflicted, but I certainly don’t judge those people for seeking and getting care, so we need to be a bit kinder to ourselves.

Newyorklady, I was 100% sure that insurance was going to find some stupid loophole or change coverage or whatever and I would get denied. I had a gut instinct that would happen. Well, it actually went through with a next day approval first try, so maybe the part of my gut that knew it was going to be denied is the portion of my gut I’m removing. :)

My coworker that is almost 8 years post sleeve told me that this is the easiest diet she ever went on. And for me I’d say my experience has been very similar. A bit of struggle at the beginning, but I feel like I am finally free from endless and all consuming hunger and cravings. I’ve been on so many diets and this is the easiest and best one ever.

And screw the people who say it’s the easy way out- so what if it is? How much suffering do you think that a fat person deserves to have in order to lose weight? Do we have to serve a certain amount of penance to make society happy? Unless they are weaving their own cloth for clothes and using a washing board at the creek out back, I’m pretty sure they are taking the “easy way out” in a lot of their life.

I was just thinking about this thread the other day. Reporting back almost six months post surgery to say,
1. I didn’t die! Obviously.
2. I didn’t have any complications. Easy recovery, feel totally normal now but just get full super quickly.
3. It is working and I have 120 lbs of missing fat to show that’s true.
4. Insurance approved! Best advice is to find the requirements and make that your exact goal. Insurance wants you to drop out, so stick it to them and make em pay!
5. Regain will always be a fear, but I’ve grown more confident that I can use this tool to control my regain down the road. No matter how you lose weight, keeping it off will be a lifelong struggle.

Basically I just wanted to check back in because I keep reading threads about people presurgery who are scared and have a lot of fears. It’s totally normal to have a ton of fear but please know that for the vast majority of us, it all ends up fine in the end.

Hello to everyone and a very big thank you to all of you for taking the time to respond.
Unfortunately, the guy I was seeing broke it off with me and I never had to worry about bc in the first place (sorry if TMI). It was a pretty upsetting breakup. But at least thanks to all of your input, I have some ideas for the future, if anyone special ever does come along.

I think this is something that isn't said alot on here because of the fear of making others feel bad. I mean I get how it would be defeating to read about other's non-issue recovery/experiences when one is really struggling. With that said, I theorize there are actually quite a lot of people out there who actually did experience this process as "the easy way out" and did not struggle at all.
I just basically said this in another thread: While it IS very nice/kind to keep the feelings of others in mind when posting stuff, it is also totally okay to say eff YEAH to Celebrate your own successes, whether it came easy or not. The level of difficulty one goes through to get to goal doesn't diminish nor increase the value of said goal. A goal is a goal is a goal. Yay, EVERYONE!

Same here brother! Wasted a lot of time with the lap band before I had this done. The sleeve abides!

I love these lists! I’m still 52 lbs from goal, but so far I have a whole list:
1. Not feeling like I have to rush home to get into pajamas because it’s the only thing that doesn’t feel like it’s strangling me. Bras just fit better when you arent as fat, who knew.
2. Chairs! Chairs with arms! Flimsy looking chairs! Patio chairs!
3. So much variety in clothes, and I can wear styles I like instead of huge frumpy cardigans over everything. I can thrift now, and shop in pretty much any store.
4. I feel like I have energy and interest in doing things again. I don’t just want to hide out at home and eat all weekend long.
5. Not being terrified of running into someone I knew 10+ years ago in public because of how fat I’d gotten.
6. I can go up the stairs and not die. I can exercise and not feel like I might die. Amazing.
7. I wore a pair of shorts yesterday and they weren’t Bermuda length! And my thighs didn’t start a small fire.
8. I like my facial features so much better now. My eyes look bigger, my jawline actually exists, and I look more like myself.
9. At my heaviest my arms stuck out weird because of the fat, and my legs were always at a weird angle because of fat as well. I can rest my arms by my sides and stand with my feet together.

Yesss, getting rid of bra extenders is amazing!