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Hcat
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Home from Jesse Brown VA Medical Ctr in Chicago, surgery was on 7/21, they kept me in ICU the entire time. First 2 days were rough on me, my breathing was shallow & my heartrate was lower than they liked. Day 3 was easier, but they kept me 1 more day, day four (today) made the over 350mi ride home, over 6hrs. Stopped a few times to walk, go to the bathroom(#1). Still on clear liquid diet, boy those sugar free popsicles sure taste good. Crushed ice has been my fav too. I am sipping on water, broth, sf Gatorade & sf jello as instructed. Holding a pillow on my tummy helped along with walking, they sent me home wearing a binder, that was a godsend along with a pillow, it softened the seatbelt and rough spots in the road. Doing ok, Boy, was my trip home miserable, my husband b*****d at me for every & anything, said this surgery was elective & is bogus, said he was disgusted with me & wanted to divorce me. He also loaded up on a dbl qtr pounder, fries & soda infront of me, I had no desire for his food, thank god, but that wasn't nice of him! This journey has really made me determined to stand up for my self when I recover. We've been together for 34yrs, since we were 17yo, but his words & actions today hurt the most. I know I have to stand strong & do what is best for me, even without his support.
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Do this for you.
However, you might want to have your own bank account and credit in your own name and build yourself up emotionally, financially, medically and move from your strengths to another strength. An unsupportive family is tough. That is going to be hard. But you have come this far. You are going to make it !!!
Could be that he is terrified for you, and for himself.
Take small steps and celebrate your recovery and new outlook on life !
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Thanks to all, I usually don't air my dirty laundry but needed the support at a time when I am not receiving it at home. He's always been an a**h*** to me. I do have my own bank acct & income & medical care, through the years I've tried to put safety plans aside for myself. I also own my home, my name only, clear & free. I guess if I am smart I'd beat him to filing divorce. It's just so much to digest & years wasted. It really hurt when I couldn't get ahold of him to come pick me up from the hosp during discharge, later he screamed & cursed me that he wasn't ready. He knew that day would come, he should've been ready, but no, he wanted to drink the night before & sleep it off when I was being discharged. I am just glad I am home. I am determined to do what is best for my surgery & health.
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