BigSue

Oh yes. I felt that way many times in the beginning. The first several weeks are the hardest because you're still recovering from surgery, you have a lot of restrictions on what you can eat, you have to drink nasty protein shakes, and you haven't lost enough weight to feel the benefits of the surgery. Once you get to the regular foods stage and get the benefits of weight loss, things will get a lot easier. I'm almost two years out now, and that miserable newly post-op stage feels like a lifetime ago -- just a tiny blip on my journey to losing 200 pounds. Hang in there!

Leftovers are the best! I live alone, so I regularly make multi-serving meals and freeze in individual portions (Souper Cubes = game changer). Soup, chili, and stew freeze wonderfully. I have a freezer full of meals that I can prepare in a couple of minutes by dumping some cauliflower rice and a meal cube in a bowl and heating in the microwave. I also keep a lot of cooked chicken in the freezer that I can throw in a salad in the morning so it's thawed by lunch.

I've been tracking everything I eat in MyFitnessPal for over two years -- since about 5 months before my surgery. For me, this was key in changing my eating habits, both before and after surgery. I don't think it's counting calories, per se, that works, but the fact that it forces me to confront my food choices and get the most bang for the buck, calorie-wise. Constantly budgeting my calories has helped me to shift my food choices to low-calorie but satisfying foods. That's especially important now that I'm almost two years post-op and I can eat pretty decent portions (compared to the first several months post-op when I could only eat tiny quantities). If I weren't choosing low-calorie foods, I think I could easily get enough calories to start gaining the weight back. A lot of people swear by "intuitive eating," and if that works for you, great, but I don't see it working for me. I think my intuition had to be pretty out of whack to get me to 341 pounds. I think it's possible that I've changed my eating habits enough at this point that I could stop tracking and be ok, but I don't want to put that to the test. I eat mostly the same things over and over, so if I stick to that, even without tracking, I would probably stay within the same calorie range. I do have a hard time when traveling or eating at restaurants because it's difficult to guesstimate when someone else is preparing the food, but I very rarely eat at restaurants, so I try not to stress too much over the occasional meal that's not 100% accurate. I've also relaxed a little on weighing and measuring some things because I've gotten a good sense of portion sizes (e.g., half a small avocado is about 50 grams on average; 6 slices of thin-sliced turkey lunchmeat is about 75 grams), and some things are low enough in calories that it's not worth the trouble (e.g., I don't measure salad greens or cucumbers or tomatoes). I like Dr. Weiner's approach of "a pound of cure" (which involves eating at least a pound of vegetables every day) because focusing on eating a lot of vegetables helps me to fill up on foods that are nutritious but low in calories. Every week, I meal prep daily veggie trays (carrots, celery, cucumbers, grape tomatoes, and peppers), and that's my main snack for the day. I also add cauliflower rice to a lot of meals to make them more filling without adding a lot of calories.

@learn2cook gave you some great advice about what to look for, but you may need to adjust your expectations. You didn’t say what kind of complications your friend had, but there’s always a risk of complications with any surgery and it isn‘t necessarily related to the surgeon’s level of skill. I can see why you would be wary about that, but just because one patient had complications doesn’t necessarily mean the surgeon isn’t good. Also, I’m not sure what kind of scheduling issues you had, but that is not the surgeon’s fault. The office staff is a legitimate consideration since you will have several pre- and post-surgery visits, but if it’s just a matter of being booked a long time in advance, well, sometimes that’s just how it is — especially for a surgeon who is in high demand.

It is very common for iron supplements to cause nausea, which can sometimes be alleviated by taking on a full stomach (which apparently didn’t work for you). You might want to try chelated iron supplements (iron bisglycinate), which are supposed to be better absorbed and less likely to cause nausea or constipation, and switch to a multivitamin without iron.

My surgeon used the Da Vinci robot. He was oddly insistent that he (the surgeon) was performing the surgery, not the robot; I guess some people misunderstand the concept of robotic surgery and picture R2D2 cutting them open. He said he does the surgery both with and without the robot, but he prefers using the robot, and I was in favor of anything that made it easier for him to do the surgery. My understanding is that the advantages of the robot are that it is more dexterous than human hands, and it allows for smaller incisions. My incisions were certainly quite small and healed quickly, and the scars are barely visible now (2 years later).

I've noticed something similar with medical professionals. When I went to the doctor as a fat person, the doctors, nurses, PAs, etc. were usually pretty aloof towards me and treated me like a number. I assumed it was because healthcare workers are intentionally detached and they're like that with all patients. Now that I'm no longer overweight, they are so much friendlier and more sympathetic. The nurses strike up conversations with me while they're taking my vitals. They are more concerned about symptoms, like, "Oh, you're not feeling well? You poor dear!" where I guess they used to be thinking, "Anything that's wrong is your fault because you're fat." It's no secret that medical professionals are biased against fat patients, and I avoided going to doctors because I knew that no matter what the problem was, the cause would be that I'm fat and the cure would be to lose weight (as though I didn't know and hadn't tried). I didn't expect it to be so blatant, though.

My resting heart rate dropped to under 40 bpm. Every time I went to a doctor, they commented on it (they frequently thought there was something wrong with their instrument and had to check it manually), but nobody was that concerned… Until I started having problems. I was feeling weak and run down all the time, but everything was fine with my bloodwork, and finally my surgeon suggested it may have been related to my low heart rate and referred me to a cardiologist, who diagnosed me with bradycardia. The cardiologist said that it was probably because my heart was used to having to work hard while I was walking around with 200 extra pounds, and once I lost so much weight and got in better shape, my heart was stronger than it needed to be and slowed down to compensate. I ended up having to get a pacemaker. The cardiologist said that bradycardia due to extreme weight loss is rare, and that even when it happens, it’s not a problem unless it causes symptoms.

I’m almost 2 years post op and I still kind of feel like my life revolves around my surgery. Not my surgery per se, but everything related to maintaining my weight loss. I spend so much time and energy preparing and eating food. I think so much about what I should eat and constantly have to decide how to “spend” my calories. I constantly analyze whether I’m hungry or full or head hungry. I spend so much time working out. I have to remember to take all my supplements at the right times (since some of them interfere with each other and/or my thyroid medication). It is exhausting! And I often wonder how sustainable this is. On the upside, though, I try to remember that being morbidity obese was also exhausting! I was constantly worrying about people judging my weight, whether I could fit into chairs or spaces, arriving everywhere early to make sure I wouldn’t have to squeeze between people, hiding what and how much I ate because people were judging (actually, I still hate being watched while I eat, still feel judged, even though I’m eating quite healthy), sweating all the time, etc. So either way, my life revolved around my weight, and on the balance, this side of it is better. But yeah, for me, every day still feels like a struggle.

Have you tried cauliflower rice? It is one of my favorite foods because I feel like I’m eating rice (which many bariatric patients do not tolerate well) but I’m actually eating vegetables. It’s also really quick and easy to prepare; I buy the frozen stuff and just dump some in a bowl and microwave it. FWIW, I am almost 2 years post op and I eat tons of raw vegetables without issue. I eat salads all the time and have a daily snack of raw carrots, celery, cucumber, grape tomatoes, and peppers (with Walden Farms ranch dressing as a dip).

Seconding this! I was way too embarrassed to have to ask for an extender. Once I found out I could bring my own, flying was much less stressful. (But even better now that I don’t need one!)

I didn’t get one specifically for gastric bypass, but I later had to get one for another condition, so I also added “NO NSAIDS, NO BLIND NG TUBE”. I got a sidekick from roadid.com (same thing is also available on Amazon). It attaches to my watch band, so it’s not a separate bracelet.

1. Like many people, I weighed more when I left the hospital than when I checked in, due to the IV fluids. The number on the scale is meaningless for at least the first couple of weeks. I see people here all the time who are freaking out that they haven’t lost weight in the first week, but you need to have patience. The first few weeks are all about getting your protein and water. Don’t even look at the scale if it’s going to make you anxious. I lost 70 pounds before surgery. Nobody seemed to notice until I had lost over 100 pounds total (about 2 months after surgery), which was also about the time I had to buy new pants. But I started out really big (BMI over 60), so it might be noticeable more quickly if you have less to lose. 2. I was on liquids for the first week, so options were limited. I mainly had protein shakes, protein soups, sugar free Jello, and sugar free popsicles. In the puréed stage, I ate a lot of triple zero Greek yogurt and puréed refried beans with enchilada sauce (both with protein powder mixed in). 3. I went back to work 11 days after surgery and I felt good. As I lost more weight, I felt great, full of energy even though I was eating very little. Unfortunately, that started to change about a year post-op, and now I feel weak and tired all the time. 4. I went from not really exercising at all to working out every day. My recommendation for starting out is Leslie Sansone videos on YouTube (someone here recommended them to me). I started with 15-minute videos and now I do about an hour every day. I also got a Fitbit and have over 1 year of 10,000 steps per day. It is hard to stay motivated because sometimes I just don’t wanna, but at the same time, it gets easier the more weight you lose and the better shape you get into. This might be controversial, but it’s what works for me: I exercise every day. No days off. At least 30 minutes of cardio. To me, it’s easier keep it up when I tell myself I have to do it every day. Also, I used to work out when I got home from work. Now I work out first thing in the morning to get it out of the way and that’s a game changer. I wear my workout clothes to bed and put my pre-workout supplement on my nightstand. As soon as I wake up, I drink my pre-workout and start exercising.

https://mbsc.arbormetrix.com/Registry/public/calculator/uiCalculator/7?menuId=1013 This site has a lot of data about weight loss surgery. You can enter your information and see the average weight loss for your demographics at 1 year, 2 years, and 3 years. (Hint: after you enter your data, click the disk icon on the top right of the page to calculate.)

My face definitely looks older. I don’t have a lot of wrinkles or look like a deflated balloon; my face just looks kind of boney. I think the plumpness in the face (chubby cheeks) from being overweight makes one look younger, so losing a lot of weight has the opposite effect. (I feel lucky that my double chin tightened itself up as I lost weight; I wouldn’t have been surprised to end up with a big wattle, but I didn’t.) My hair also looks horrible. It’s normal to lose a lot of hair after surgery (telogen effluvium) but mine never got back to normal. But you know what? People are constantly telling me how great I look (but sometimes they first ask if I’m sick). I think it’s kind of a sad commentary on how the world views weight, but in terms of overall appearance, losing weight will outweigh (ha ha) the negative changes. I’m not aware of any supplements that will help, so your best bet is probably just normal anti-aging skin care products. And maybe Botox.

You can do this! Two years ago, I had a similar situation -- my surgeon wanted me to lose 20 pounds before surgery and I didn't know where to begin. Here's one of the first posts I ever made on this site: Long story short: I ended up losing 70 pounds in the 5 months before my surgery (and another 130 pounds after surgery). My first advice on where to begin is always to start tracking your food. MyFitnessPal makes it pretty easy, and entering everything you eat can be really eye-opening and help you figure out where to get the most bang for your buck. Start by looking at the healthiest things you already like to eat, and eat those things more often while reducing the highest-calorie things that aren't worth it. As you do this, you can gradually reduce your calorie intake and start losing weight. Once you get on a roll, 11 pounds will seem like nothing. Plus, it will help you to get a head start on some of the changes you will need to make after surgery. Good luck!

I prefer protein powder over ready-to-drink shakes, and powder tends to be less expensive. My favorite brand of protein powder is Ideal Lean, but it is really a matter of personal taste. For ready-to-drink shakes, Equate brand is pretty much the same as Premier Protein but priced much lower. I am almost 2 years out now and I no longer drink protein shakes. I get plenty of protein from food, and I'd rather eat food than drink a protein shake. It is really important to budget for what you'll need post-op, and don't forget about vitamins. The best value in bariatric vitamins is the BariatricPal brand multivitamin, which is $99.99/year for a subscription (I recommend you buy a smaller bottle first and make sure you like them before you subscribe; also, you'll probably need chewables for the first few months after surgery). Depending on your program/bloodwork, you may need additional vitamins (I take calcium, chelated iron, vitamin B-12, vitamin D, and biotin in addition to the multivitamin, and I also use pre-workout and essential amino acid supplements). Vitamins are super important for gastric bypass patients, so you have to make sure you're prepared to buy them before you have the surgery. In the early post-op stages, I was eating so little that the costs balanced out. Now that I'm eating regular food and larger portions, though, I am spending a lot more on food than I was before surgery, even though I'm eating less. I used to shop sales and buy cheap food. Things like chips, crackers, cookies, candy, frozen meals and snacks, baking ingredients (sugar, flour, oil, butter), etc., can be very inexpensive when you buy them on sale. Now, I buy a lot of fresh produce, meat, fish, herbs, and spices, plus some healthier substitutions (sugar-free sweeteners, protein bars, low-calorie salad dressing, sugar-free condiments, olive/avocado oil, coconut flour, etc.) and prioritize health and taste over price. I'm sure I could spend less and still eat healthy if I really needed to, but I have invested so much into this surgery and losing weight that I'm willing to spend more money on food that helps me stick to my plan.

My surgeon used the Da Vinci robotic system. He was oddly emphatic that HE (the surgeon) would be performing the surgery with the robot; I guess some people have a misconception that robotic surgery means that a robot is performing the surgery. Given the choice, I would prefer robotic surgery. My surgeon said that he performs the surgery both with and without the robot, but he prefers the robot, and frankly, that is reason enough for me. Surgery requires a high level of skill and attention to detail, and I want my surgeon to use the tools with which he is most comfortable and that allow him to do his best work. I was also told that robotic surgery can allow the surgeon to make smaller incisions, so that's a bonus.

Do you have a white/yellow/orange coating on your tongue? If so, you may have oral thrush (a fungal infection). I had that after my surgery, I suspect because I was using a lot of Listerine breath strips. If you use breath strips or mouthwash too much, you can kill all of the good bacteria in your mouth that keep the fungus at bay, and end up with a fungal infection. If that's what it is, using a salt water rinse several times per day can get rid of it, and if that doesn't work, there are prescription mouthwashes.

I'm 20 months out and I haven't had alcohol since my surgery. I didn't drink much before my surgery, either. I've always been a lightweight with alcohol (ironic, when I was 340 pounds), and I've read that alcohol has a stronger effect on bariatric patients, so I'm afraid to try even a single glass of wine now. I don't remember how long after my surgery I waited to eat salad, but I eat salad and raw veggies all the time now. A big plate of carrots, celery, cucumber, cherry tomatoes, and peppers is my main snack every day. I think salad is a slider food for me because I can eat a rather large salad, no problem (I love Skinny Girl and Walden Farms dressings because I can be generous without adding a lot of calories). I don't eat bread; I've heard that a lot of bariatric patients have problems digesting it. I've tried a bite or two without issue, but I don't feel like it's worth pushing my luck.

I forgot about pasta in my previous reply… I haven’t eaten regular pasta since my surgery. Shirataki noodles are pretty good if you take the time to prepare them correctly, but it’s kind of an involved process and I’m too lazy to do it often. Zoodles (zucchini noodles) are ok; I prefer them cooked in the air fryer so they’re not so soggy. I love spaghetti squash (delicious roasted in the air fryer), but it doesn’t really taste like spaghetti. Radishes are a good substitute for potatoes in soups and stews. They don’t have much flavor, but they have a similar texture. I don’t do keto (super low carb) and I don’t think it’s sustainable long-term for most people, and also not necessarily good for bariatric patients because it’s a high-fat diet, but I do try to avoid sugar, white flour, rice, potatoes, etc. Most of my carbs are from low-starch vegetables and legumes.

I'm 18 months out and I still rarely eat refined carbs. I mainly eat vegetables, lean protein (poultry, fish, pork, egg whites), and legumes. I don't eat a lot of processed low-carb substitute foods because they tend to be overpriced and often high in fat and calories, but I do have a few go-to substitutions: Cauliflower rice - I eat this several times per week and don't miss real rice at all. I buy the frozen stuff, so it's even faster and easier to prepare than real rice. Mr. Tortilla 1-net-carb tortillas (these are small and great for tacos). La Banderita carb counter tortillas (larger and great for wraps, and I cannot tell the difference from real flour tortillas). Mashed cauliflower - good substitute for mashed potatoes (with a lot of garlic and herbs, and low fat gravy).

First of all, don't lose sight of the fact that you have done great so far. You lost 95 pounds! That's fantastic. Since you said that you've stalled and are not losing, I'm assuming that means you haven't started regaining any of the weight, right? If that's the case, then you're in maintenance, so if you want to start losing again, you just have to lower your food intake and/or increase your exercise. Diet has a much bigger effect on weight loss than exercise, but exercise has a lot of other benefits, so it's a good idea to get back into exercise as well, even if it's just a little. Leslie Sansone's Walk at Home videos on YouTube are great, and you can start with short ones (there are several that are 15 minutes or less) if you don't want to or don't have time to do a longer walk or workout. Are you tracking everything you eat? If not, I think that's a great first step to kick-starting a change. Apps like MyFitnessPal or Baritastic make it easy, and tracking can help you identify the easiest changes to make. What are the healthiest foods that you already like to eat? Start eating those things more often, and cut out (or reduce) the stuff that's not worth the calories. If you like to cook, go on Pinterest to find some new recipes that are both tasty and healthy. Finally, I recommend not fixating on a specific number on the scale. Everyone is different, and you may not be able to get to 150, but that doesn't mean you failed. I bet you have already had some great non-scale victories with a 95-pound weight loss. Has your health improved? Are you more able to keep up with your kids? Can you wear clothes from non-plus size stores? Are you less self-conscious in social/professional situations? These things are all more meaningful than a number on the scale.

YMMV, of course, but I think it's pretty common to have problems with meat early on but eventually improve. I had a lot of trouble with meat for the first several months after I got to the solid food stage. Even though I was very careful to make sure it was moist (usually with some kind of sauce), eat small bites, and chew well, I would often get a feeling of a bite getting stuck on the way down, and it was very unpleasant but would usually clear up in 10-20 minutes. I'm 20 months out now, and I almost never have problems with anything I eat anymore. Every once in a great while (maybe once in 3 months), I take too big of a bite and/or don't chew well enough and get that "stuck" feeling, but I eat meat all the time without issue. I will say that I've gotten in the habit of taking small bites and chewing well, and most of the meat I eat is in a dish with sauce or a soup/stew, but I don't really have to think about it or be careful because now that's what feels normal to me. I, too, love my smoker and greatly enjoy smoked chicken, ribs, and pulled pork with sugar-free BBQ sauce! I haven't tried brisket since my surgery; I rarely eat red meat in general.

It is unlikely that these results will preclude surgery. It’s possible that they may want you to go on medication to reduce your blood glucose/A1C before surgery, but lowering blood glucose is one of the desired outcomes from surgery, so not a read to deny it.