Poster child

me, too! glad I found this thread!

I have a dilemna that has been bugging me for the past 2 years. Need some help. My ex dumped me on Christmas Eve 2004. He said there was no one else but I later found out a new woman was in the picture. Someone fit and thin and exciting. We had planned on getting married, building a new house, etc. Needless to say, I was floored and totally upset. I decided to move on and have no contact with him. Well, he would not stop e-mailing me and sometimes he called. This has gone on for the past 2 years. He wants to be 'friends'. States I am the best friend he ever had and needs/wants me to be friends with him. He knows I had the surgery and has seen me since. I've lost 55lbs and all he could say was 'wow'. He had since moved on from one GF to the next. She is even more exciting and 'fitter'. He always wants to know if I'm exercising, etc. I've told him I need to move on several times, I have ignored him and his e-mails only to have him create a crisis in his life that I am the only one that can handle it. I do want someone who loves and respects me and accepts me for the person I am. I am afraid if he finds out out I've met someone, he would sabboatge it somehow. I am a professional, well educated woman and am entitled to find someone I deserve. The irony of it all is I am his best friend and he is mine. I really wanted to marry my best friend. Why is he using me like this? Is he that shallow/scared of me being thin? Has anyone gone through this here? Thanks for listening/reading. I needed to vent.

I agree with you, Barbara. I've thought very hard about it and I know I am the one who just has to say no more and move on. I haven't responded to his e-mails for the past week and have actually deleted them. I feel good turning on the computer not worrying what's on the other side of that message. Many thanks!

Checking in. At 210 lbs! BMI 36. I just realized I am on the raod to onederland! It's truly amazing!

If you want to cook, I suggest buying Eating for life by Bill Phillips. The meals are easy, portioned controlled and delicous. Perfect balance of fat, carbs and protein. For leftovers, it's great. I've been making those meals and do not have any problems cooking for one.

They may stare but most people will admire you to get in the gym and workout. I used to go to a gym about 10 years ago. Very cool atmosphere with nice people. One woman was very large and everyone in the entire gym bent over backwards to help her succeed. She did it! Good luck! Trust me, those muscleheads are there to look and feel better, too.

One more thing...he is toxic to my success. I lost about 40 lbs a couple of years ago and he begged me to stop losing weight. he was against me getting the band. Imagine that?? I am much smarter now.

They are really good guys. I am going to checkout beginner triathlete. Thanks!

Thanks Paul, Jack and dotofoz! I agree with all your responses. i feel so much better 'talking' about it. I am grateful to you all!!

Pam, they don't know about me as far as I know. If they did, I'd know they'd run. It will come around to haunt him very shortly. he e-mailed me yesterday to say he met a friend of mine. His new girlfriend knows her husband. Only he doesn't know that she(my friend) knows the entire story! I'll bet his little masquerade will soon be over. I believe in this phrase "what goes around, comes around"....

Cool...that's where I bought my bike. Tim and Henry are great! You'll enjoy their service. If you ever need to bring it in for service, let me know so I can come say hello.

Thank you both for the kind words. I do have faith and will move on. I feel so much better getting this off my chest. he had this hold on me that I was 'defective'...

Thank you all for the responses. I have, at least on my part, kicked him to the curb to fend for himself. I know he is using me. The hard part for me is the truth. Hopefully, I will find someone new. That's what I keep telling myself everyday! Thank you all again for reading and listening. :-)

I've noticed others are really complementing me on my weightloss and it feels uncomfortable. I downplay it alot of the time and I don't know why. Interesting, I can now wear size 18 clothes comfortably but when I go out, I wear my plus size clothes and they are really baggy. I haven't been shopping yet, I still feel like I am on the outside looking in!

here's mine...2005 Boxster S and also have a Cayenne S.:clap2:

BPM, I live in Columbia and it's true all the races seem to be in Greenville. Go to the Carolina Triathalon website. It's a bike and tri store committed to cycling and triathalons. I got some bike upgrades there and the people were really nice. I am going to try to do something to celebrate my weightloss and I can't think of a better goal that completing a race.

I live in Sc and I am going to try doing one of the Carolina Upstate series next spring. I am hoping to be at goal, only 65-80 more lbs to go! I do love riding. I am not much of a swimmer but I will try. I am going to do a few centuries later this year and the Assault on Mt Mitchell(NC). I need to do this for me to prove to myself that I do not have to sit on the sidelines and watch. It's great your wife is into triathalons. I need to meet someone someday who just wants to be fit and active. I used to date someone who was totally competitive and that was not good. I was always put down because I wasn't fit enough. Let's start sharing training tips!

I agree. But Giant has no weight limit on the frame and lifetime warranty. I have been riding mine on the trainer because it's been so hot. But, for road riding, it doesn't have too much 'flex' in the frame and has been very good for me even at higher weights. I am training for an ironman as well!

The Felt is more of a racing bike set-up as is the TCR. I needed an XS frame and the TCR was available. I do love it. I did switch out to the Ultegra brakes. Not too expensive an upgrade. You will probably want to switch as your brakes wear down. Good luck!

Cool bike. I have a TCR1 which I bought last year and totally love it. I would do one upgrade...add the Ultegra brakes if not already on there. I kept wondering why the bike wouldn't stop like my other. I learned it had really crappy brakes on a very expensive bike!!! I am going to ride now. Enjoy!

I did BFL many times over the past few years. I did manage to lose about 20 lbs. I am going to back to using the recipes from Eating for Life. They are so good and eay to make! I think I will do a challenge in the few weeks. I would love to see how far i can go now that I am banded!!! Maybe we should start a BFL challenge ourselves and enter?????

I am adding my BMI...36.7 Sorry, I forgot. It's nice to see you back P'nut! I miss reading all your posts!

Got a fill on Tuesday. My first one! I did it under fluro and had to drink some barium to see the everything. He was very aggressive...2.9cc fill!! I am back on track, so 214.5!!!!

Just checking in...I've stayed the same 218. But, I get my first fill on Tuesday!!!

Hey, Just checking in! Down to 218 but I know I need a fill. I am beginning to eat more and am hungrier between meals. So I called the surgeon's office only to be told they only do fills once a month under fluro at the hospital. I am scheduled for August 9th but I am scared my weight loss will slow down. I have lost approximately 50lbs from my highest weight(268) in about 3 months(since 4/11/06), so I am not disappointed. I am exercising but I am going to step it up and hope to remain the same weight or lose. I enjoy reading the posts! This is the best support group and a great bunch of people!! Take care all.