AJ Tylo

I want to start with this post was done in Word first and I have been working on it for two weeks or so. It is long …. but it is a compilation of 1000’s of read posts, which I took notes on, My history of hiring a Doctor, Nutritionist and the help of great friends who were psychologists, doctors and healthy. I want to thank this place it is filled with the most educated experienced people I have seen. Some help emotionally, This place is a wealth of knowledge! As I read posts I have notebooks I take notes in, Its only intention is to share, educate, and help. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or psychologist – However I have stayed at a holiday in express lately (for those confused it is a USA Tv Commercial Google it) Me: I have been gaining weight on a regular basis for the last 15 years, lose some gain it back. I was topping out at 394 – 6 pounds away from 400 lbs. Did a stint in the NCH cardio ward, and just was FUBAR. So I chose to do surgery. But I did it wrong, I since have fixed it but Messed up! So, from that disclaimer here we go – Mental Health (MH) -Vitamins/Minerals (VM) and Food (F) Subject #1 – Mental Health – I have chosen to put the three topics in the order I feel they should be addressed, My procedure. Starting with a little background one of the persons I have been seeing for a long time has a roommate who is a mental health expert. I was always intrigued by her and how she lived her life. She is comfortable with her mind and body, She is in good shape, her mind is sharp, always happy, has a doctrine of mental health, years of experience, and done 100’s of panel study’s on mental health. Worked for the FBI as a proffiler, studied the most deranged criminals, people who are just gone in rubber rooms, What kept my fascination, was her modern day hippie like lifestyle, If she wanted to be with a guy she would, Girl next time OK, Be alone Great. Worked a lot but was simple and life was good. He name is Kristina. Females let’s not get a lynch mob going, I choose to be with a gaggle of females, It is open and I don’t lie or hide it. Including my X wife who has described it as a need to push the envelope, I get bored easy and like the different personalities, and adventures. I always have to be in a whirlwind of energy and input. But nobody lies, No deceptions, No games. It works for me for now. This post is blunt and to the point. So nobody take offense just my view 45 days prior to my surgery I informed only a select group of family, Partners, and my management staff that I was scheduled for surgery, So one Saturday Night a girlfriend Susan was spending the night, A typical Sunday plan was set for the next day, lay by the pool, grill, nap music, TV. The on the 7th day he rested! First thing she said Sunday morning was, do you care if Kristina joins us today? Me being the typical male views two girls are better then one. Little did I know I was getting set up. So Sunday the three of us are hanging at my pool and having a good time when Susan gets out and says she will be back in a few hours, tons of files and work to do for Monday. This is typical since we all have careers and companies. After about 20 minutes of chit chat and being lazy Kristina comes to me and says. I need to talk to you as a Doctor of Mental Health and your friend I was informed you are having weight loss surgery. I get the defense on but was asked to listen. “Aj I approached you a few months back after I did the panel at Loyola Hospital in Chicago, If you remember it was on Alpha Mid aged males and condition of burning the candle at both ends, I was not on the panel 20 minutes when you were my perfect subject, Your moto to Work Hard, Play Hard and Stay Hard lifestyle was exactly what this panel was about.” I got defensive and clearly did not want to do this. Now I want to give you my professional diagnosis on this surgery. You CAN NOT DO THE surgery, you should not do the surgery, the surgery is a tool it is not a cure, remedy, or fix. It is a tool! If you do take this tool you will kill yourself, like any tool if you do not know how to use a tool you will get hurt or die. Your mental health is poor, and I feel you are looking to buy a quick fix to a problem, you will use this tool as a crutch and then you will weaponize this tool. You have had heart issues, and a lower GI problem will be more medical problems. I truly feel you will kill yourself unintentionally by using it as a crutch or quick fix. Of COURSE, I IGNORED HER! Post surgery I got this, No problems, yea right! For the first 30 days I spent all my time on food, focusing totally on food what to eat how to eat, total waste of time. At the end if 30 days I was FUBARED. I was dehydrated, malnourished, and a basket case. Those around me saw this and did all they could but I fought it, then one day I got a text. Aj you want my help? Kristina. I sat back and thought about it and laid ground rules and gave in. I agreed to let her do he Voodoo mental magic thing. Still being an Ass about it but at least opened the door a little. Her we go Persons History. I was asked to make a list of all my behaviors, habits, routines, addictions, issues, in a given history – We chose from Freshman college to current. Prior to that I was healthy, happy No mommy issues, all good. My partial list: Vodka-food-drive thrus- carry out- carbs – sugar – Harleys – boats – trips – non monogamous – trips – processed food- diet coke – more vodka – smoking- multiple relationships at same time- diet coke – 711- McDonalds – Uber eats – Sleep deprivation- French fries- Legal- Club fed Federal prison- delivery pizza – Lazy – Tv – eating out – boxed food – AND THE LIST GOES ON AND ON. You get the point. So, we carefully went thru it and it clearly showed I was out of control. I lived by two mottos Carpie Diem (Seize the day), and work hard, play hard, stay hard. It was clear I was not ready to have this surgery, but I had gone ahead and done it and was in poor shape. So, we broke the list out and focused on the mental health, getting most of it behind and moving forward. The simple thing is all these items in your list are your life, you can’t just wipe the hard drive, you have to address them head on. I did not do this prior to surgery or after surgery, and once I could not eat out, drink, etc. my head took over and played games. So, all the posts you see on Head Games – Fact! It took time but quickly I got my head in order, is everything on that list eliminated, No. But I clearly understand what I can do, what my choice for surgery affects my lifestyle, and my obsessions/habits have done to this body for 35 years. So a plan was put in place – Mental and Physical – None of us are in this forum because we are anorexic, bulimic, or in good mental health. We were fat and had mental issues! Sorry but the truth hurts. I was a mess, you have to be mentally ready to do this surgery, Do not do what I did, Make it easier on yourself, be ready Only my view: F#$ck Food! Section #2 – Vitamins and Minerals – Picture One below After you have your head on straight and are mentally ready you must understand nutrition. Don’t believe the internet, filled with adds and self-promotions. Keep it simple you must set up a Vitamin and Mineral plan for life. All of us are different and it requires a ton of work, blood tests, and dedication thru trial and error. I hired a nutrient specialist who really helped but it took trial and error. Understand it is not a simple pill, or plate of veggies. Each one of us lives differently Using me as a example I am very active and need a heavy dose of Vit/Min. My body does not process and store them very well, why? Who knows? I beat the hell out of it for 35 years. Also remember a 100mg multi vitamin does not contain all you need, also your body may pass up to 75% of it- So you are only getting 25% of 25% of what you really need to be in tune. This is a b***h to do, but if you get it calibrated it is a bigger improvement then losing the pounds, together they are amazing feelings. Focus on this and ask the more you get good at this the easier the journey. Don’t fall for the adds and marketing just set a plan that works for you. Below is a picture of my supplement program. The yellow thing in the middle is a Hero Pill dispenser, it is programmed to deliver vitamins all day. I do my morning daily hit and it delivers a different vit/Min at given times of the day. I have one in my office and one in my home, you program it and set the times, it texts me and beeps. You will also see liquid and powder supplements. To me these are base blocks for the program. I am not promoting any of them they are what I needed and they work. So get a plan and Get on it. Read the labels Not the pretty picture or advertisement. It is a math game - For me I take in 3 times what I need in a day, because some just passes thru, some I need more of for example Energy, Im close to balanced, I choose to use pills and powders because I don’t want to eat a plate of spinach vs a pill. Not saying don’t eat healthy but you do not have the ability after surgery to consume even a close amount of food for vitamins and minerals. Its not possible. Subject #3 – FOOD – Picture 3 F#@ck Food once again. This is what got us all in to trouble. Not only are we obsessed with it, but we abused it. We are/were FAT. Our unhealthy food intake over the years lead us to health problems and mental problems. Being fat sucks, nobody can say they love/loved being fat! So, you suffered physically and mentally till you made the right choice! Sorry to be blunt, but we did it – So deal with it and fix it. I am male so we are not as concerned about our bodies as females but we all agree we did this to be happy, Getting our food in line is a step: I still say F#@ck food and barely eat. But don’t follow my lead I know this to be wrong, just at war with food currently. 1. There is no doubt you have to use Protein Drinks to sustain your program. It is easy. You will see below what goes into mine. I forgot to put the actual protein drink in the picture … Sorry. But I rotate between them. I jack mine up from 20 g protein to 20 g additional added. I add scope of vitamins (Big Black container) to each one. The liquid Vitamin added 1.5 oz -Two Heaping tablespoons of yogurt, One Tablespoon Peanut butter, 2oz almond milk, and flavors. I use fruits to make it taste good and add flavors. Drop in ice and blend. I do rotate the vitamins I add one a day and grind it up. B-12 is my issue so I grind one up also. I pour 12oz and drink it by 1:00 pm – about 3 oz at a time. There is no way you could possibly want to eat – you will be full and blasted with vitamins and minerals. This does get old quickly, but it is a must. 2. Protein – Picture 3 – Prior to surgery I did not even have a separate freezer, I relied on eating out, delivery, or daily runs to the grocery store for unhealthy food. So I do say this – Give yourself a break, take your time shopping, read the labels, It is not easy. It takes time. Spend the extra dollar on something you like, buy a lobster you earned it! You are saving a ton of money not eating junk I choose to buy in large amounts and package proteins for daily meals. That freezer has beef, chicken, fish, shrimp, lobster, scallops, bacon, pork, and yes a few bags of vegies. Its is all you need post-surgery to eat. Yes, I am OCD and overstock but I have 2 teenage boys and tons of kids that show up to eat. It was so hard to get the food protein right, once you do …. Its game on. However hard it is you have to get off the food obsession, its over you had decades of good times with her, now move on. I choose to stay clear of eating out, just makes me uncomfortable and uneasy, but there are great posts on this all over this forum. 3. Last subject picture 4 – Once I got calibrated and in order I got a puppy as a present from a group of family and friends. Winston is my buddy, he is my support dog, and it is a tool that keeps me focused and off some of my bad habits and lifestyles. Everyone needs a tool find you damm tool and use it. This was a long dissertation and has views, I suggest you get good at these three things and the rewards are unlimited. Special thanx to all who have posted here, I have 100s of notes, This is just how I took all these posts, my research and came up with a solution. I have things to calibrate still and 28 pounds to go, but it was the best decision I ever made. Now Seize the Day , but in a healthy happy way.

This is still knocking the hell out of me - I was weak and drained for 60 days, However after i Screwed up post op i got my stuff togethor on the vitamins and minerals and balanced out. You may have your supplements messed up and it is not the surgery it is the lack of nutrients. I just did a post yesterday on this exact subject read it. I was focused on losing weight and did not realize i was nutrient deficient. Once i got that balanced work was a ton easier

Ok Coming out of the closet on this one - I was advised to stay clear of it for 3 months - I did not and still do not follow direction very well. I will have a few drinks a few times a week - But Let me say it sucks - I drink vodka with juice ice water anything i can to soften the pain, I was a heavy drinker and now just 4 oz knocks me to obliteration. However it is really rough on your stomach and you will be miserable the following day. My view is take your time feel it out, but get ready it is painful

Do the next step - Read my post from yesterday - Get your head ready. You will love the journey

BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE HANDS DOWN - READ MY POST FROM YESTERDAY

Focus on your Vitamins and Minerals along with Protien. From what i have seen here we all eat different, I eat very very little and rely on supplements and Shakes, I could handle about half a can of soup - pureed with a few oz of brooth for the first month. FYI Eat very very slow you are in the first step. 5 oz of soup would take me 30 minutes to get down

I hate water and it is my most difficult challenge, Do not go ape **** crazy measuring oz's Sip it and do what you can I am a big guy and a Nutritionist told me to shoot for 48 - Also remember eat moist foods, easy to swallow and digest and they have water. For example I brine chicken first so it is loaded with water. One thing that saves me is pop sickles - The ones in the plastic tubes off amazon. I make them and flavor them and at electrolytes. I feel for you - Water is a pain in the ass for some people

Welcome to the Jungle - You are not hungry and it will pass- Read my post from yesterday please - Everyone has gone thru what you are going thru, Re Focus you are still addicted to food F#$ck Food! - You may be thirsty and it is appearing to be hunger pains, but since you got all the nerves cut out there is no way your stomach is hungry. It is a b***h to get your head going and there are tons of posts on it.

You wall got this one covered for sure - My view is Head Games! F#$ck sugar -

Hostile work place - Follow the rules of you company. Mean people suck. But HR should be able to handle this matter -

MOve move move - I went thru hell with the gas - The baby gas drops helped but it took me moving and healing - It was 60 days for me

Naples Florida Dr Bass Gulf Coast Biaratrics

I agree this is a doctors issue - I toss most things that i shouldnt

You got this - Best decision you made - Only uphill here from now on and weight goes downhill - My only advice try and move as much as you can it will help

I tried it and Heaved it right up = I loved sushi also - Now i just make red neck sushi - Use butter lettuce wraps and roll tuna in it - Cut into sushi pieces, Seems to work

Same day for me but no pool or bath for a month If you a guy ask for a sponge bath in the hospital = JK

Yes its fake sugar and ok - But why would you go to Chix filet? Going to drive you nutz- I would make your own with fake stila sugar

So far the sleeve is doing it for me - I did my sleeve for my kids! Just get healthy and happy you have a gaggle of little ones that need you! I also would have your husband get surgery, Not sleeve by Fixed! Tell him i did it was a breeze, awkward but easy

Love this - I have 25 to go and feel for you, Going slowly even though i am less then 600 calories a day? Im done with food for life - I wrecked me and really dont miss it

I was the worse eater in the world - 52 years of junk, fast food, and beat the hell out of my body. Sugar was a my lifeline. I started with switching to fake healthy sugar then eventually got off it all together. I had the sleeve and it was the best decision i ever made. You can use my decision - I sat down and decided to choose to life vs eat and drink, Good luck and I hope it works out for you

Only 6 months in but i have cleared the head games! use lettuce vs bread is what i do

As above I agree Hydration first and just do what you can, DO NOT FOCUS ON LABELS Since you should not be eating any processed food. I was all liquids for 13 days till a little bit of pudding. Get you plan ready for week 3 untill then just hydrate and get to the Happy place of Post surgery. You have a big plan to put together in terms of food, Vitamins, Minerals and then you can do calories.

You will see posted billions of times Head Games come free with this surgery - Was the best decision i made and will be yours also Its a head game, beat the game

I don't think you have to postpone your trip at all: I was sleeved July 18 and since then have gone to Ocean CIty fishing on a offshore boat, Gone to Cuba to fall in love and fish, and just got back last weekend from a 4 day offshore here in Florida - and those trips rock and roll and are physically hard. What to ask. = I would ask any real question you have, You are paying him. For example make sure you understand the Air issues, Gas issues, and heartburn issues. Not that you will get them all but the Air is a given. If I was to go back to pre surgery I would have spent a ton more time on Nutrition and food planning and Vitamins and Minerals. It took me about 3 weeks to really get the hang of N.F.V.M (My acronym for above) This is hard and is key to being happy healthy. The main problem is all the freaking adds. Buy this - Do this- Buy this. I choose to hire a nutritionist and go extreme on the Vits and Minerals. I am a engineer by trade so the research and planning was a big project. Focus on each of the NFVM individually and all will be well. 95 percent of the stuff you will read on the net is marketing. I have found this place to be great Facts and not marketing - with exception to the adds to the right. This will be a great journey for you but nothing is easy, Getting set up Pre Surgery is my suggestion, after surgery its hard but not impossible to get the action plan in place FYI: Get out of bed as soon as you can and do this. Walk Sip Walk walk walk SIp walk walk sip walk - In other words move, It is the key to the first week being a a hell of a lot easier

Im amazed you were able to keep it down - Im out 6 months and will tose up a roll or hotdog bun with ease - I doubt you did in long term damage, Like stated above its a journey and there is some big ass bumps in the road - we all have been there