Arabesque

First congratulations on your weight loss so far. Yay! Secondly, constipation is a common problem & a pain in the butt (meant the pun). Try adding some non swelling, soluble fibre to your diet like Benefibre & ensure you’re meeting your fluid goals. Try to keep on top of it with medications, & try to avoid not going for extended periods of time - too painful & stressful. I didn’t mind if I didn’t go every day but I took a stool softener if I hadn’t gone after three days so I would have some action on the fourth day. Maybe track your pooping (not Sheldon Cooper style 😉 but just when you go) so you can avoid prolonged periods if constipation.

Yes it does get way better & easier. Because we’re different & we heal & recover in our own time, there’s no real definitive time frame when this will happen for you. Your tummy becomes less sensitive & fussy, the sensitivity you may develop for certain tastes & smells goes, you feel more comfortable & confident about what you can eat, you can eat more & a wider variety of foods. And one day you’ll look back & go yep, I’ve come a long way from those first couple of weeks. In the meantime keep eating small bites slowly. Remember too the restricted diet & staged return to eating specific foods is to support & not stress your healing tummy. I wasn’t able or interested in eating much either. I ate from a teaspoon & each bite was barely 1/2 a teaspoon. I wasn’t eating 300 calories those first months & barely ate 900 at 6 months. Started with eating only 1/4 to 1/3 cup from purée. Got to almost a cup at 6 months. You will slowly but surely be able to eat more too. Try some anti nausea meds to help with your nausea. Most are prescribed them initially. Ask for some or try some over the counter ones & see if they help. I had varying degrees of nausea in the morning for 8 months. It stopped when I stopped taking my multi vitamins (didn’t need them) - they’re often the culprit especially iron.

The end of the honeymoon phase means not that you won’t or can’t loose anymore weight but that you’ll have to work harder to lose it. The honeymoon phase refers more to the time when you’re losing at the faster rate, your hunger & interest in eating is low, those initial wonderful benefits of the surgery. After they start to fade, you have to rely on the work you’re doing to establish new habits & your learning & understanding of food, eating & your body’s needs. For most the honeymoon period ends around the 6-12 month mark when their hunger starts to return, they’re eating larger portions & a wider variety of foods & as they get closer to the weight their body wants to be. Their are many who continue to lose weight well after this time.

Hold off on the eyelid lift @Sunnyer too. I had hooded eyelids, waste of time wearing eyeshadow, & had often mused about getting an eyelid lift. But somewhere in my second year I suddenly realised I had eyelids. That fatty skin that folded & drooped over my eyes was greatly reduced. I spend a fortune on eyeshadow now. There’s some saggy skin around the eyelid but much in the words of @ms.sss, I’m 57 I should have some lines. I decided against fillers in my marionette lines @loridee11 because I didn’t want the puffy face look. I worked hard to get cheek bones & facial definition. 😁 but as I said the filler in the hollow in front of my ears did help with depth & length of the lines. Not the most flattering pxt but look I have eyelids. (Ignore the dark bruised eye circles. They’re curtesy of my glaucoma drops. 😩) The labial fold line on my left was as long as the one on the right which was longer too. The marionette lines from my mouth changed much the same way. Oh and the slightly pursed puffy upper lip is the Dysport lip curl.

😂😂😂 I bought a magnifying illuminated mirror for my bathroom to help with my fading eye sight. Big mistake. Big. Huge.

Some do experience random bouts of nausea. Your tummy is still sensitive & can be fussy & decide it doesn’t like certain foods for a little while. It can even say no way to something today & tomorrow it’s fine. So it could be just that. Your sense of smell & taste also become more sensitive for a couple of months. And yes you can develop temporary intolerances to things like lactose & artificial sweeteners that are alcohol sugars (those that end in ‘ol’) . Yes, your hormones do go haywire too causing your menstrual cycle & accompanying PMT symptoms to be strange because of the estrogen that is released from your fat as you lose weight. It can make you more fertile too. Some doctors recommend doubling up on contraceptives. So maybe take a pregnancy test to be sure.

Haven’t done plastic surgery. Don’t think the recovery & scaring is worth it for the little lose skin I have. If they took it from all over my body they’d probably only remove 1or 2 kilograms. But beauty treatments, I’m like @ms.sss. My name is Arabesque & I’m vain. It’s something that only started in the last two years. Was never this bad before surgery. It’s my new addiction. Had Dysport (Botox) in my forehead, between the brows, chin & upper lip (lip curl) several times. I love it. The lip curl is amusing as for the first couple of days after it starts working, I sort of lisp & feel like a can’t pronounce some words & cleaning my teeth is a hoot - can’t spit out the toothpaste it sort of drools out. Several RF sessions in my second year. Don’t know if it did anything because I did it around the time my weight was stabilising & my body was resettling. Liked the experience though - soothing. Filler on the side of my face. Had sunken pockets of no fat in front of my ears. It lifted my marionette lines a little. Had one derma pen (deeper micro needling) treatment (subsequent sessions delayed for many reasons) but am having my first combined micro needling & RF (even deeper needling & RF which occurs below the surface of the skin) in January. Takes three moths to start to see any effects & you need about 6 treatments of derma pen but inky 4 with combined treatment. Think I see a little reduction in my acne scarring, which was the main purpose of having it. The combined treatment is supposed to aid skin laxity. We’ll see. Have monthly facials, pedicures (like doing my own finger nails) & have had micro blading (best thing ever). Having first teeth whitening this afternoon. Don’t know what I’ll try next.

I do the opposite, I often eat more quickly when I’m out with others. I notice my pace speeds up to keep up their eating. I have to consciously, put my cutlery down & sit back from the table. At home, I take ages to eat - 30-60 minutes. Don’t know if eating quickly is related to causing additional snacking other than you may get full more quickly before your tummy gets a chance to start to digest what you’ve eaten. Does your restriction kick in? Does it stop you eating all your regular portion? If so you may feel hungry again because you haven’t eaten enough & then you snack. If you don’t/can’t eat all your portion, snack on that rather than less nutritious foods. But yes, as we progress we are able to eat more which is how it should be until you get to about an accepted regular portion size when your weight stabilises. Have a chat with your dietician.

You never beat cravings you just learn how to recognise & manage them. Look to why you are craving those foods too. Boredom, habit, emotional need, stress, are likely culprits. But hormones & certain medications can be causes too. Look for something to distract you. Go for a walk, ring a friend, clean a cupboard, read, craft, play a game, check social media or this forum. Have something to drink like a cup of tea or water. Look for healthier alternatives. Like craving sweet, have a little fruit. As @Spinoza said, soup, yoghurt & shakes aren’t slider foods. While liquids do pass through your digestive system more quickly they do still fill you up. Sliders (highly processed carbs & sugars) don’t fill you up & you can easily eat more than you should. If you can get those foods out of the house. If they’re not in the cupboard or fridge you can’t eat them. At the time of the year, it can be difficult not to have them in the house. I had some less desirable foods leftovers from Christmas drinks. I gave some to my guests & others to my nieces & nephews & my pantry is empty again. No temptation.

You’ve had a pretty major surgery so pain is to be expected but don’t just accept it & try to endure it. If you were prescribed them take them. Pain will hinder your recovery. I took opioids for 4 days. (I only took one that day so I would sleep that night but I don’t think I really needed it.) In a few days the pain will be gone except for some twinges & some discomfort with certain movements or if you do too much which is easily managed if need be with over the counter (not NSAIDS) pain meds.

So sorry you experienced this. And they always do it out of the goodness of their heart & in your best interest. Out of curiosity, does your friend have a weight issue? Could it be jealousy that you are doing something about your health & she isn’t?? Get some stats ready for next time you see them. Morbidity rates after bariatric surgery ate less than 1% which is way less than many other surgeries. 0.7% for appendectomy while only 0.3% for sleeve. Obesity is the 5th highest cause of death world wide - 2.8 million people die each year from obesity related illnesses & complications. Would they comment if you were having a different non weight related surgery? I deliberately did not tell some friends. One in particular as she has always been very competitive. I told her I was seeing a dietician & had done a lot of research into eating & in relation to my personal needs. All true & sure enough she started seeing a dietician (she had put a little weight -age- but wasn’t even really overweight). And then came the what size are you wearing now questions. She was always wearing the same or a smaller size. Mind you she wasn’t my size but you can understand why I didn’t tell her.

I’m sorry you have been through such emotional upheaval that compromised your weight loss journey. You had other battles & issues you were dealing with which didn’t allow you to fully embrace the benefits of your surgery. Sometimes life gets in the way of all our good intentions. Glad you are seeing a therapist now to support you. Many find therapy a great benefit to their weight loss. And remember, you did lose more than 100lbs which is an achievement. The efficacy of the pouch reset is questionable. Some swear it works & others say it doesn’t. It really is just going back on the very low calories diet you followed immediately after surgery. Have you considered going to a dietician & working on eating in a way that is more like what you were doing when you were into eating solid foods with protein & fluid goals, watching portion size, lowish carbs, fats & sugar, etc. so adopting a healthy, & nutrient dense diet. If you think you have stretched your tummy out, maybe a revision surgery may be helpful. Certainly worth a conversation with your old surgeon or a new one to see if it is possible. Others here will likely have more knowledge & experience about this. What ever you decide, all the best.

Popcorn is a slider food. It’s easy to eat so you end up eating way more than you can actually manage hence the feeling awful after. https://nutritionforweightlosssurgery.com/slider-foods/ Carrot was the first food I threw up, @Spinoza. Ate it one day & it was fine. The next day up it came. A few days later & ever since no problem. Our tummy’s have so many quirky idiosyncrasies that sometimes you can’t predict how it will react. Even three & a half years later I learn things about my tummy & digestive system.

You’ll get lots of different responses to your question. You may have gas pains - I didn’t after my sleeve but had heaps after my gall surgery. The gas is not in your digestive system but in your abdominal cavity so burping & farting won’t help. It rises & gets trapped under your lungs causing nerve pain usually in your shoulder. You actually breathe it out so walk, walk, walk as you can, do deep breathing, march on the spot & heat packs can ease the discomfort. It’s usually gone in a week or less. Yoi’ll get good drugs for the surgical pain. I took my last one on at night on day 4 to ensure I slept & didn’t need them after that. You may find it difficult to sleep in your bed & some sleep in a recliner. I slept in my bed in my usual side twist position from day 1. You will experience abdominal tenderness. It can make getting up & down a little difficult but go slowly. Some find a binder useful or even a cane but that is very individual. I didn’t use or need either. You may be bloated from all the fluid they pump you with & you may end up weighing more after the surgery than you did before. You pee it out over a few days. You may experience swelling in your throat from the breathing tube which causes pain on swallowing & sometimes lots of saliva. Mine lasted about 3 days. Nausea is also quite common but you should be given medication for that & to take home too as well as a PPI to help with excess stomach acid. You may experience a very sudden diarrhoea attack which occurs without warning. I did. It was awful … & messy. It’s from all the fluids, blood from the surgery, etc. It may persist for a few days. Otherwise, you’ll likely experience constipation which may persist for several months in varying degrees. Add soluble, non swelling fibre to your diet, keep your fluids up & keep on top of the constipation. I took a stool softener if I got to three days without any movement. And don’t worry if your poop is small or you only go every two days. You’re not eating much so don’t have much waste for your body to excrete. You will have periods of low energy & tiredness. You’ve had a pretty major surgery & are on a restricted diet. If your body says stop & rest, stop & rest. It’s healing & trying to recover. I found an electrolyte drink helped & gave me a little boost. Follow your plan. Follow your plan. Follow your plan. But don’t worry if you don’t meet all your protein & fluid goals straight out. As long as you’re close & getting closer each week you’re good. If you don’t feel well, are experiencing excessive pain or pain that persists, or something feels wrong to you, contact your surgery or go to a medical centre. It may be nothing but better to be safe & sure. Hope I haven’t scared you. All of this is temporary. All the best with your surgery & recovery.

Congratulations. A fabulous achievement. 🏆

The goal should be to stop before you feel full or feel your restriction. You’ve eaten too much if you feel it. I found it very helpful (& I do talk about this a lot) to learn to recognise the difference between needing to eat or wanting to eat. Do I need this next bite or just want it. Needing is real hunger & that your body needs it to function. Wanting is head hunger, eating out of habit, craving, etc. If I don’t need the next bite or I feel/know I’ve had enough I don’t eat any more. It doesn’t matter if I haven’t eaten all my portion. My fridge often has unfinished portions - rolled oats today which I’ll add to & have tomorrow. It takes time to work out how this works & what it means for you. The restriction won’t be there for ever.

My biggest energy drop was in my third month. Was so tired almost fell off my treadmill. Just depends on your body & how it deals with stress & how you heal & recover. Best thing to do is listen to it. If your body says rest, have a nana nap or stop what you’re doing & take a break. I found electrolyte drinks helpful (used Hydralyte) to give me a little boost.

I think it depends upon the severity of the attack. My first attack had me writhing on the bed, severe pain around my right side - front & back, sweating, no pain meds helped. Lasted 40 minutes. Had a less severe attack a few days later before I had my gall removed. They had picked up I had a stone in a scan to check my liver (yep one lousy stone that was only about 1cm wide that made me think I was dying ) about 6 months previously so I knew what the pain was. Gall stones can be common after weight loss surgery, so best to get it checked out.

The restriction has physical symptoms. It’s a tightness across your chest. I find myself thumping my chest as if that will help move the food through my digestive system & ease the tightness - it doesn’t. The goal is not to feel the restriction as it is generally a signal you’ve eaten too much. Sometimes, though, I find it sneaks up on me. Stress, eating denser food or foods that sit heavily in my tummy (bread, pasta, rice, cous cous, potato, & such) can set it off early when I’ve eaten very little. You wont start to feel it until you’re more healed & on solid foods. It does fade over time & as you get better at recognising when you’ve eaten enough - not full but enough that you don’t need the next bite. Learning to recognise the difference between needing to eat & wanting to eat is some of that head work that gets talked about. Vomiting can occur but generally you’re more likely to experience the foamies. You may feel your restriction at the same time because food is ‘stuck’ because it’s too dry, too coarse or you’ve eaten too big a bite or too quickly. You’ll spit up slimy foamy saliva & may regurgitate (not the deep muscle cramping of vomiting) the last bite or so of what you ate. My nose often runs with it. Often after you bring up that bit of food you can continue to eat after a short break. Another one of those learning things & getting to know your body’s idiosyncrasies. It’s not a common or frequent occurrence. You may not get a drain after your sleeve surgery. I didn’t & no one I knows did, though seems more common in the US.

I bought a new one recently because my old one died. I bought a weight watchers scale. Mid price of their range. It does a lot of things like measures your fat, bone density, water. I just use it for my weight. Can’t be bothered to set the personalised report function. I weigh a couple of times a week now just to keep myself honest & on track.

Not every one reaches their goal weight. The average is a loss of about 65% of the weight you have to lose to be in a healthy range at around the three year mark for sleeve or bypass. This takes in the common 3rd year regain, compliance, lifestyle, etc. of course some exceed this & some don’t reach it. Love it or hate it BMI can be a good guide or starting point. If you’ve a larger frame look to the higher end of your BMI range. A small frame then the lower end of the range. Medications, age, general health, etc. can all influence what a healthy weight is for you as well the weight you feel most comfortable. Then there is your body’s new set point - a gift of the surgery. This is the weight your body is happiest at. It may not be the weight you wanted but it will be a weight that will be easier to maintain. I chose a weight which had been the weight I’d be able to get down to in the past (always bounced between 60-75 kgs) & my surgeon agreed it was an appropriate & realistic goal (interestingly it would have been 75% of what I did lose). My body had a different idea & I lost more. My set point put me at a weight lower than my goal. For years I was told I had a larger frame. But when the weight went the truth was I have a smaller frame & my lower weight is fine for me. I haven’t had any skin removal because I felt I didn’t have that much & it wouldn’t be worth the surgery, recovery & scaring. But that’s me. They’d probably remove less than 1kilogram of lose skin from all over my body.

I reached goal at 6 months (31kg - 68lbs). I continued to lose for another 11 months losing about another 12kg (26lb - so total of about 43kg/95lbs) I was losing only around 0.5kg (1lb) a month in the last couple of months but I was eating more & had been working at slowing my weight loss for several months. At 3yrs 7 months I weigh about 50.5kg (111lbs). The more you have to lose, the faster you’ll lose at first but then your rate will slow. You eat more & a wider variety of food as you progress which is what you should be doing. It does slow your rate of loss but it is a healthier rate of losing & you’re eating more like you will be in the long term. Don’t get too caught up in comparing your weight loss or rate of loss though. There are too many factors that can influence your loss. Existing medical conditions, medications, lifestyle choices, mobility, age, gender, genetics, weight loss history, amount of weight to lose, etc. Congratulations on your weight loss so far. 100lbs in a year is great.

I’d be afraid that if your surgeon wasn’t supportive 12yrs ago that they won’t be supportive now. Criticising you for gaining weight 1week post surgery is appalling. When they do the surgery, they pump you full of gas so they can see the surgical field & they pump you full of fluid to keep you hydrated afterwards. It’s very common for people to weigh more when they come out of hospital than they did when they went in. Many are advised not to weigh themselves for at least a week post surgery because of this. Maybe look into another surgeon if you’re able. Also find out if you really have PCOS or not so you know if that needs to be managed & supported. Weight loss surgery will improve insulin resistance, metabolic syndrome & other comorbidities. There are numerous people on this forum who had these conditions & PCOS before surgery. It seems those with PCOS do tend to lose more slowly. But I’m sure some will share their experiences. My doctor used to check my thyroid (there is a family history) often but it was always fine too. I often skipped meals & did it from my teenage years through to my early 50s. So my metabolism was crap - I’d struggle to lose weight eating less than 900 calories. Plus I think hormones were a contributing factor as well - my weight issues began at puberty & worsened with menopause. The surgery boosted my metabolism & evened put some of my hormones. Ask your surgeon lots of questions about how the surgery may work for you & what you may expect with your existing conditions. Even ask for stats about his patients. Then when you will feel more confident about your decision.

Unfortunately, we never rid ourselves of those old habits & cravings. All we can do is recognise them for what they are, identify what may be behind them (stress, emotions, boredom, etc.) & learn strategies to manage them & take away some of their power. And yes, therapy can help a lot. In the meantime look for something to distract yourself. Go for a walk, play a game, craft, read, clean out a cupboard - sort out those clothes that are starting to get too big, watch a movie/documentary/ TV program, ring a friend, check social media & this forum.

It’s the same as how babies are transitioned from milk to purées to soft. Just way more quickly. You can purée a lot of meats but just add enough liquids to keep it pretty runny still. (Think dollop at thickest.) Gravy, stock, mayo, sauces, etc. are good liquids to use. The only issue I had was my changed taste buds. Some things just tasted plain awful like tinned fish. Mashed boiled eggs, puréed soups & milky rolled oats were my favourite go tos. I did try baby food a couple of times. In soft food, I cooked a lot of mince dishes (savoury mince, meat balls bolognese sauce), slow cooked stews & meat & vegetable soups, scrambled eggs & omelettes, soft flaky fish (poached or steamed). Keep it moist & the meat fall off the bone soft & tender. I also added a variety of vegetables in my meals: onion, tomato, celery, mushrooms, peas, capsicum, carrot, etc. Any I could cook in with the slow cooked dishes.