Arabesque

I still eat from a side plate but have graduated to dessert forks now. 😉 I try to distract myself between bites: read, watch tv, play a game on a device, check social media, etc. I even fold my laundry between bites. I know on the surface that seems to defeat the mindful eating recommendations but for me it takes my mind off eating & just shovelling the food in. Bout then when I go to have the next bite I think about why I’m having it. I’ve said this a lot but ask yourself do I need this bite or just want it? If it’s ‘want’ put the fork/spoon down. You don’t ‘have’ to eat that bite. You may eat it in another couple of minutes or you may have had enough to eat. I also check the time I have my first bite & randomly check as I eat to make sure I’m not eating too fast. It takes time for new habits to become established & just your everyday. You’ll get there.

100% agree with @Jaelzion. I had tried many diets & eating programs & lost hundreds of kgs. I’ve run, walked, swam, biked 1000s of km. The 60-75kg weight fluctuation I’d struggled & fought to maintain for decades suddenly became 91kgs & I could not shift a single kg. I could see what was ahead of me & it wasn’t good physiologically or psychologically. The 31kg (67lbs) I needed to lose was a lot on my short & smaller framed body & more of a challenging given I was 54 & menopausal. That I lost 42kg (92lbs) has been a blessing & I’m thankful every day. And yes it was worth the $10 000 out of pocket cost (Australian health insurance is pretty crappy.) But I can understand your feelings this close post surgery. It’s all very scary & many question their decision the first couple of weeks. Hopefully, as the weeks pass you’ll feel more positive & confident about your surgery & what you’ll achieve. All the best.

Add to all the above is the emotional & stress aspect. You have had pretty major surgery. Are experiencing pain & likely confusion & worry. Plus you’re on a restrictive diet. In the past you likely would have turned to food to provide you with support & comfort when experiencing similar stress & emotional upset. You can’t turn to food this time but the cravings & desire to eat for comfort remains. The surgery changes you physically but unfortunately it doesn’t change how you think & feel. Wish there was a simple, instant solution. Give yourself time to heal & come to terms with the changes. A conversation with your medical team, dietician &/or a therapist is always helpful. All the best.

That’s fantastic. Especially enjoyed the 1lb you assigned to your poop too. 😆😆😆

What did your medical team say at your first check up? If they weren’t concerned by your slow loss you probably don’t need to worry too much. Remember they’ve seen it all & understand the vagaries of weight loss. We all lose at our own rate. If it is really worrying you, ensure you measure/weigh & record everything you eat & drink & have a chat with your dietician & medical team. Sometimes a small tweak can make a difference. @WildWill has a point. What I weigh at my doctors & what I weigh at home is never the same. I always weigh more at my doctors. Clothing, time of day, empty/full bladder, empty/full bowel, how much you’ve eaten or drunk, all affect the number on the scale. My doctors monitor my weight based on their records & I do it based on my own records. If they’re happy I’m happy. A loss is a loss. (Or maintaining is maintaining as in my situation now.) All the best.

I love bio oil. I’ve even used it on old scars & it improved them too. I applied it morning & night & massaged it in to help break down any scar tissue. I only have tiny faint lines left which you have to look for to see. Just wait till the scars are fully healed (no open skin). As for bruising it really depends. I bruise very easily but surprisingly I didn’t have any bruises after my sleeve or my gall removal but my surgeon is very gentle. If you do scar try the silicon tape as well.

As long as you’re taking your daily dose it shouldn’t matter too much when you take it. I used to take one multi vitamin in the morning & one in the evening to reduce the nausea taking them brought on. Just make sure to take them after you’ve eaten or with the last few sips of your shake, broth, etc.

I swear I have never read about, thought about or written about bowel movements more since my surgery than I had in my entire pre surgery life. 😆😆😆. Some people really struggle with constipation & go for multiple days or a week or more without a bowel motion. You’re eating very little & all liquids so you don’t have a lot of solids to poop out at first. Small bowel movements every couple of days is not unusual. I only took a stool softener when I got to day 3 without any movement so on day 4 there would be some action & it would still only be a small poop. Watch the psyllium husks as they absorb fluids & swell in your tummy adding to your bloating . Look for non swelling fibre. All your shakes, broths, etc. count towards your daily fluid total. Are you drinking so much fluid to manage your dry mouth? Give some of the biotene dry mouth products a try to help with your dry mouth. Dry mouth can occur after surgery but it’s usually temporary. I’d suggest giving your medical team a call.

Happy anniversary & congratulations on your weight loss @Betty1971. Whoo hoo!

Generally the average daily recommended amount of sugar an adult woman should consume each day is 24g but we should be consuming a less while losing. Check with your nutritionalist as to what she requires as plans are different. I wasn’t given a specific maximum amount not to exceed. Some protein shakes have a lot of sugar so you’ll have to shop around to find the ones you like with the lowest sugar content. I only had to have shakes for the first two weeks post surgery. I wasn’t overly worried about sugar (or fat or carbs) those first two weeks but then I wasn’t eating much anyway -<300 calories. I only had one a day & a serve of soup/broth so not a big issue really. Once I stared purées I was very vigilant. But again check with your nutritionalist about this. While losing I only ate meat, dairy, vegetables & fruit so the only sugar I had was in yoghurt & the naturally occurring sugar in milk & fruit. I still keep my sugar low & continue to avoid things with added sugar, articulate sweeteners or sugar alternatives as much as I can. But that’s my choice now. You’ll discover that everyday you’ll decide what you’ll eat based upon the food’s nutrient value. Checking the sugar, fats, carbs, protein content & keeping a running total of how much you’re eating as the day progresses becomes a daily part of your life & will influence your food choices throughout the day. Reach your maximum sugar in the morning then avoid it for the rest of the day. Oh, and while dumping is uncommon with gastric sleeve it can happen & sugar is often the cause. So tread carefully. All the best.

The vomiting would have been more painful because of all the strained abdominal muscles you have from the surgery & the sutures & staples. Definitely contact your surgeon to ensure there is nothing untoward causing you to vomit. Were you given anti nausea meds in the meantime?

Once skin has been stretched there’s really nothing you can do about it (think of a well used stretched out hair band) except to surgically remove it. The younger you are, the shorter the length of time you’ve been obese& if you’ve been blessed with good genes you will have less sagging skin. I chose not to go down the surgery path to remove my bat wings (or tuck shop lady arms as we call them here in Australia - tuck shops are school canteens). I still wear sleeveless clothing. I avoid strapless, narrow straps or cut away shoulders as they tend to show off the loose skin more. I just don’t go waving my arms about in the air so others can’t really see anything. It must work as I was told a few months ago that I had beautiful arms. 😂😂😂

I love soup & made it quite regularly while I was losing (especially if I had people over for a meal). I tried to make thicker soups so closer to a purée than a liquid at first. I’d add pearl barley, beans or lentils as they tend to make the soups thicker & add protein. When I ate a chunky broth soup I’d eat the chunky solid pieces first then sip on the broth component. It would take a long time to eat a serve though. If I sipped too much of the broth with the chunks, my restriction would kick in so was worth the longer eating time for that price not to happen. And yes it does count towards your fluid intake too.

Over time you’ll get to recognise your signals & what you can & can’t eat easily. Some say they sneeze or get a runny nose when they’ve eaten enough. I don’t. If I eat too quickly or eat when stressed my restriction kicks in. If I eat food that’s too dry I’ll get the foamies or if really dry or coarse I’ll bring it up (not vomit but regurgitate). Dairy makes me gurgle more. I’ve discovered my ‘I’m full’ message sometimes seems to take a lot longer to come through. This morning I ate my milky rolled oats over about 35 mins then some 30 mins later I started to feel full, then fuller & fuller. Groan! Felt like I’d bring it up but didn’t (I was driving so probably a good thing). To counter my sometimes slow full message I eat slowly: 30-60 minutes depending upon what I’m eating - it works most times. I ask myself do I need this next bite or do I just want it - this was a big thing for me. I also try not to eat until I’m full but until I’ve had enough - another big learning. Never be afraid to put your cutlery down & sit back from the table. Use the pause to examine how you’re feeling & what you really need versus just want. Good luck.

We all experience different levels of pain & have different pain thresholds. You have been through a pretty major surgery. Your insides have been pushed & prodded & cut. Plus there are a lot of sutures & staples holding your tummy, etc. together. Pain also tells us if we’re doing too much or need to be more careful moving about. You’ll probably find in a couple more days there is a decrease in the amount of pain you are experiencing. If it’s not decreasing or your prescribed pain meds aren’t helping contact your surgeon. All the best.

It can be a challenge to increase your calories to stop losing & maintain. It took me about 11 months after I reached goal to stop losing. I understand just not being able to eat any more. I slowly added more snacks as I was able. I also noticed over the months my portion sizes for meals started getting larger. By the time I stabilised I was eating 4 or 5 snacks a day plus 3 about recommended portion sized meals. My snacks were combinations of whole & multi grain crackers, hummus, fruit, liverwurst, string cheese, nuts, protein bar, chia pudding & yoghurt. I used full fat salad dressings & added a seed mix to my rolled oats. So I upped carbs (no over processed carbs) & fats but still ensured everything I ate was nutritious (liverwurst & salad dressing aren’t good but yummy) & included 5-10g protein (except no protein in fruit). My dietician suggested I add powdered milk to my milk to make it richer but I found it too sweet. Honestly, I did feel like I was eating all day long. My lowest weight was 48.2kg & I’ve been maintaining at 49 (48.5-49.5) for 14 months now. My BMI is around 18.7 so on the low end too but I’ve got a smaller frame so it’s ok. Initially my surgeon & doctor wanted me to put on a couple of kg too. I said I didn’t want too because of the possibility of 5kg bounce back in the future. Now they’re fine with my weight & tell me I look great & have done well (& I’m actually a couple of kgs less then when they wanted me to gain). I eat about 1300 calories a day & only 3 or 4 snacks to maintain my weight. I’m not very active. I still have days or times when I don’t feel hungry but I always try to meet or be close to my protein goal. So if I don’t feel hungry say for lunch or dinner I’ll graze on a high protein yoghurt. I was a little worried I wouldn’t stop losing &/or I’d get too thin & I had some ‘well intentioned’ family & friends saying it too. But I really like how I look now. Yep, I still get surprIsed when I see my skinny legs & thigh gap or buy size 4 (US 0) clothing but it’s a good feeling. It does take a while for your body to resettle too. I initially thought I’d got so slim I’d lost my hourglass shape but it came back (still don’t have much of a butt though 😉). I should mention I haven’t had any plastic surgery. Have a chat with your surgeon & medical team & tell them honestly about how you feel about your current weight, the possibility of a reversal, etc. Do you still have access to a therapist to talk through how you’re feeling. I hope you can reach a point soon that your weight settles so you can fully embrace what you’ve achieved. All the best.

What about the fresh ready meal companies if you have access to them? Most have menu plans for various eating plans but you still will have to be vigilant on the nutritional & caloric content of each meal & portion control. One of the ready meals may last you for two meals at the moment. Like many frozen meals & supermarket ready meals, many of the fresh ready meals are pasta or rice based so remember to avoid those. When you say you don’t cook, will you cook/reheat/microwave/prep simple things? You don’t have to be a cordon Bleu chef to toss a salad together (throw in some tinned beans for a protein boost) or microwave some fresh or frozen vegetables then add meat from a grocery store bbq chicken or roast meat, or some deli meats, smoked salmon, tinned salmon or tuna, etc. I ate rolled oats made on milk with some seeds (oats are a good carb which many plans allow from early stages) - couple of mins in the microwave & ready. Find a good high protein yoghurt & a low fat cheese. Eggs are also easy & barely cooking: boiled or fried in a non stick pan. Would you try some frozen oven bake fish in the oven? (Just scrape off the batter & crumbs once cooked.)

The stats tend to say the average weight loss after about 5 years is about 65% of the weight you have to lose to put yourself in the healthy BMI range. Some lose more. Some lose less. Some keep it off. Some don’t & happily settle at a higher weight. This can be from choice, genetics, lifestyle, complacency, health, etc. For example it’s not uncommon for people to experience a 10-20lb bounce back regain around year 3. I think some surgeons give the average expected weight loss to keep expectations realistic. Mine didn’t but he asked me what weight I’d like to reach. I said 60kg because that was the lowest weight I’d reached the many, many times I’d lost weight in the past & it gave me a bmi of about 23. He said it was a realistic goal. I exceeded it (135% of the weight I had to lose). My lowest weight was 48.2. For about 14 months I’ve been about 49kg but I waver between 48.5 & 49.5. But I’m close to that 3yr mark & you never know what the future will bring so I try to be realistic about that. The average is probably a good goal but no one says you can’t exceed it & set new goals if you want & if you can can without undue restrictions & limitations on your life. Even though we’re guilty of regularly checking that scale & we know all our stats, ultimately, it’s not about the number on that scale. It’s about you being happy & healthy & enjoying your life.

May be have that first appointment & see how you feel. As others have said bad reviews don’t necessarily mean a bad surgeon. Could be just a personality clash. We felt a physician who cared for my dad was appalling (rude, uncaring, abrupt, never took time to speak to him or us about his status) but others love him. If after your first appointment you don’t feel confident & comfortable with your surgeon, find another one.

It’s another one of the everyone is different things. The post surgical fatigue & your body needing rest to heal can take a a month or so - some more some less. I got hit by low blood pressure issues (my tendency to occasional drops became all day every day) & that caused fatigue, brain doughiness, low energy & weakness. Then around months 3 or 4 I experienced a big drop in energy again. Electrolyte drinks like Hydralyte helped a lot. But I’m someone who takes longer to recover & as I said the low blood pressure was pre existing which complicated things. It wasn’t debilitating or stopped me doing things. It was more annoying than anything. I just listened to my body & took it slow & easy as it needed. And enjoy having nana naps.

It may not be related to your surgery at all. Could be a stomach ulcer, over production of stomach acid, gall problems, or a hiatal hernia causing the reflux or reflux-like symptoms. Do you get a bad taste in your mouth, burning in the back of your throat &/or bad hiccups or belching? (Reflux, hernia, excess acid) Do you get cutting pains across your tummy? (Excess acid, ulcer, gall issues) Hope they find the cause & a solution for you soon.

Va va va voom @BayougirlMrsS. Dress & boots: fabulous.

I’m sorry you feel this was the worst decision for you & you’re angry. And it doesn’t work for absolutely everyone - sometimes for genetic or physiological reasons, sometimes for psychological reasons. But if you can honestly look in the mirror & say yes I’m making changes to what I eat, I’m choosing low fat, low sugar & low carb foods, I’m eating differently to how I ate before, I’m eating smaller portions, I’m following my surgeon’s plan & my dietician’s recommendations, maybe you are one of the unlucky few for which surgery doesn’t work. The average weight loss after bariatric surgery at about the 5yr point is around 65% of the weight you had to lose to put you in the healthy bmi range. Some lose more. Some lose less. Complacency, lifestyle, health issues, age, gender, genetics, personal choice, etc. all play a part in how much you will lose & then the weight at which you happily maintain. So odds are you won’t lose & keep off all the weight you need (or want) to lose in the long term but odds are you will weigh less than you do when you started. If you buy a gym membership & never go, you won’t get any healthier, or stronger or fitter. Weight loss surgery is the same. If you don’t take advantage of the tool nothing changes. The amount of success you have is directly in proportion to the amount of effort you put in to making the long term changes. Like most (all) of us I’ve lost & regained hundreds of pounds over the years. Tried every diet, & exercise program. This time, I took advantage of the benefits the surgery afforded me in the beginning. I used the tool. I did a lot of research & changed how & what I ate. Put new habits into place. Came to understand why I was eating & worked out how I could manage those drives. I did & continue to do the work. If I didn’t consciously make those changes & continue to work at it every day, I’d be very near my highest weight again. That’s what always happened in the past: I dieted, lost weight, then would return to my old eating habits & food choices & would start to regain within days. I ate little to begin after my surgery: less than 300 calories. I was healing (all those sutures & staples holding my tummy together) plus no appetite & no real interest in food. But my calories increased as did my portion sizes over the weeks & months. I eat about 1300 calories to maintain but I’m shorter than you, likely older than you, not very active, female & have a small frame. But before surgery I could barely maintain my obese weight eating 1300 or fewer calories a day & I regularly skipped meals for decades. My metabolism was shot. I eat regularly now, eat more nutritionally dense food & eat more often then I’ve ever done before. I haven’t been this weight since I was 12 yrs old. I feel great.

Yep, pretty common. Some even find their sense of smell becomes over sensitive & the smell of certain things turn their stomach too. It’s temporary.

Some good suggestions above. I’d also look at getting off the Xanax & seeking alternative meds or reduce the dose you take to manage your anxiety & depression. Brain fog, grogginess, fatigue, etc. can be side effects of being on a too high a dose of these type of meds. All the best.