ready_2_live

First off I would like to apologize for writing in a sad tone. I don't really have people around me I can talk to, so I guess I'm venting a little here. I haven't come here in a long time because it looks like my surgery won't be approved. I have a sleep study to do and my husband, who has apnea, says he knows I don't have apnea. I really do understand that Medicare wants one comorbidity, and it isn't like I want to "wish" a comorbidity on myself, but there is so much shortness of breath, knee pain, and fatigue with me and I know it is due to the weight. I know something is going on with my breathing. I hurt on my left side at the heart every single day, so I guess I should ask them to go into more detail checking it, but isn't that like I'm wanting or asking for a comorbidity? Maybe God doesn't want me to have this surgery and maybe I am trying to push it on myself or "make" it seem like He wants me to have it. I know I "really" want the surgery so much. Ever since I realized I was probably not going to be qualified, I started trying again to lose. I lost 4 pounds then gained 5 back then lost 4 more and am steady at over 250 lbs...SO discouraged. Please don't worry or think I'm being stupid, because I won't do anything like this, but I have dreams that I just stop eating or that I cut off my stomach fat. I know it sounds gross, and I'm so sorry - it's funny because you "want" to be healthy, I mean it isn't like I want to walk in to the doctor's office and hear anything about me having a comorbitidy, but I know in my heart I have at least one because this weight is getting out of control. Okay I think I have spouted off too much and repeated too much. I know I sound like a baby right now. I'm just at a crossroads and sick of being this big. I'm sick of hurting when I get up, sit down, roll over in bed, try to be active..etc.... Okay I'll hush up now. I just ask for prayers. I know there are more important things than some fat redheaded woman who wants to be thin. I'm sorry to waste anyone's time. God bless, and please just pray. -Donna

OMG I know I shouldn't keep answering every single one, but you guys don't know how discouraged I have been. My chest has been just shaking and ...just "thank you." THANK YOU so much for caring and writing and listening. Wow. I am calling them tomorrow. First thing. THANK YOU!

Oh my gosh, God KNEW I needed a response and fast. And how quick it was! I am sitting here with a huge lump in my throat...thank you SO Much for answering...God BLESS YOU! THANK YOU so much!

Hello all! Ready_2_live here again. I haven't come back for a while. Back in May I think it was, I went to the seminar where they weighed me, and my BMI was 39. I didn't qualify. Now, I have gained weight though and know my BMI is more now. I did not gain weight on purpose at all, but this is my cycle. I am a food addict and need help. I am back at the point of wanting to cry my eyes out. I was devastated when I wasn't approved, and didn't want to come back on the board due to embarrassment. I do have a question though. Will they always go by that first initial weight, or if I have gained now, can I go back in and try at my current weight??? I am so tired of sabatoging my own efforts and my own self. Please forgive me for being whiny. I am just really sad right now and just want this surgery. But I want to do what God wants me to do. I have been a food addict and an overeater my whole life. I don't know what to do. I just wonder if I can go back to the weight loss clinic and be weighed again..I know for a fact that I would now be approved due to my weight. It was I think they said one half of a pound from the neccessary BMI for the surgery. Okay I'll hush now. I'm distraught and being repetative. I hope everyone here is doing great and thank you to anyone who takes the time to read this. God Bless You! -Donna:confused_smile:

Hello to all my new friends out there! (have I mentioned that I love this forum?) I thought I would come chill in the lounge and tell a kinda funny story about my lap band seminar on Thursday. I am fine with it, so it is all told lightheartedly.. Well, when you walk into the seminar, which most of you probably know, they take your height and weight, calculate your BMI, get you set up with a packet and show you what to fill out...yada yada yada... Well, out of all the people in the world, my husband's (of almost 9 years) ex girfriend from like '92 or '93 or something, who is blonde, tan and beatiful - took my heigh and weight. She was actually VERY nice and so was I. We laughed and talked, she complimented my hair and I complimented her too. It was all just fine. She asked me how my husband and I were and I said we were great! I even joked at the very beginning and said "okay out of all the people in the world you are going to take my height and weight?" She laughed though, and said "Don't be embarrassed we are here to help!" She was very professional and very kind. I really like her! We small talked a little as she was writing things down, and it was all good... Just thought it was kindof a funny coincidence that I walk in and there she was! During my husband and my's dating times, I had heard about her and she's basically, with looks, everything I'm not...I'm redheaded and big and chubby..people say I remind them of the campbell's Soup girl...and she is small and skinny and blonde and looks like a model:rolleyes:...anyway I don't worry about her anymore, but it was juts kinda funny that she was there.... It was still a great day..and I feel nothing but kindness toward the girl. Just thought it was quite ironic... God Bless!!!:rolleyes2:

I think I mention this with EVERY post, but I absolutely LOVE this forum. I have not been able to relate with anyone about what I go through..I come here, write what happened for the day and what I'm feeling, and within just a little while, compassionate and understanding people write back! I am thrilled with this forum! Thank you all SOOOOO much - I wish I could express through typing what it means to have people to talk with! My mom is little, my sister is little, most of my friends are little - I don't at ALL begrudge them that - but they just don't understand. I can sit and lament with tears flowing like a fountain and bless their hearts all they can do is look at me and nod,,,which is sweet, but nothing like this. THANK you for the comments and replies.. I can't wait to get more! God Bless!:crying:

Hello all! Well, I just got home a few minutes ago from the lap band seminar. The only thing I didn't like about the trip was that I'd never been, and had a little trouble with highway exits and such! LOL VERY informative and very encouraging. Now, I really want the surgery more! Is that silly? See, there is something that made my stomach drop though..okay, my highest weight was 269.7 lbs....Right now I am at 247.5 lbs and my height is 5'6...I don't have hypertension or diabetes...I do have huge heart palpitations with just a little walking, and massive lower back and knee and thigh pain. I also have plantar facitis. I wonder if that is going to count as a comorbidity or not. Plus I know I will gain back unless a miracle occurs because unfortunately, I've become all too used to that type of pattern... Please dont' get me wrong, it isn't like I want to have a severe comorbidity..but my pattern is lose, gain lose gain, and when I'm bigger, oh my gosh the pain and heart palpitations are awful...my legs feel creepy crawly all the time.... Anyways, who knows? I may not even be approved. I am just going to be very honest as I go along, and if God is wanting me to have this like I thought He'd put in my path, then it will be done. If not, I just will have to be accepting. I hope everyone else is doing well, no matter what stages of this you guys are in! I love this forum! God Bless -Donna.:crying:

Hello all! I was wondering if anyone has had any experience with Medicare and this surgery. When my doctor suggested the surgery as I boo hoo-ed in her office a few months ago, I said to her through my frustrated tears, "yeah like Medicare would pay for that" and she said well actually they do. I was shocked. Also I called the medical facility where I go to the seminar today, and I asked her - she said over half of the patients that get the surgery there are Medicare... I have seen different things online and heard different things elsewhere about the 6 month supervised diet. I've heard that they do require it, but I've heard more that they don't. Can anyone tell me anything about their experience with, or what they know about Medicare and this? Does it vary from state to state??? Thanks to anyone who knows! God Bless! -Donna:smile2:

Kathystrick, I am so terribly SORRY that you have had such a day. Oh my heart BREAKS for these families...and this precious young girl who did nothing wrong - I am just sitting here shaking my head and stunned. May the Lord just quickly wrap a blanket of comfort around everyone that has been touched by tragedy. Oh I am so so sorry. R2L

Gosh I hope I'm putting my threads in the right categories! There are so many! LOL Well, I am scheduled to be at the Lap Band Seminar at 2:00 in another city tomorrow. The very first step. I hear that they pass around an actual lap band and that it is a very thorough and informative program. I guess we'll see. I'm anxious to go - just a little nervous as well! Don't know why I'm really bugging anyone with this info, I guess just to let people know I'm going! I wonder if there is a question/answer time or what. I also had to download a pretty lengthy patient packet. I sat cross legged on my bed last night and took out all my diet "journal" and "prayer" notebooks, and I was as accurate as I possibly could be! I'm just anxious to know what they expect, as well as what I should/could expect. By the way, I LOVE this forum already. People are so nonjudgmental and supportive. They are also straight-shooters, and I love it. Sometimes people that haven't gone through the rigorous trials of losing and regaining don't understand, and think there is an easy "fix" to lose weight. That is why I was so happy to find this place. I feel I can freely ask or say anything without someone popping back with "geez, just eat better and exercise." I've had that said to me so much...oh if they only knew.... God Bless! r2l

Hi Linda13! I know exactly what you are going through, as you can see from my tearful first thread up there! I was reading your reply and just shaking my head "yes" with everything you wrote. It gets so very tiring to just try and try and try your heart out to lose, only to gain back. This has been ongoing for me for so long!!! I hope that we can just glide through this and get the approval we need faster than we both think! May God bless you and all your endeavors... I'm so glad you replied!!! -ready_2_live

Hello YoungNy. You know, you make a lot of sense. I was just giving up because of being so excited to see and get results, unlike all the other times I've tried. But you're right - the wait or the hoops to jump through - definitely worth it..thank you for your candid and right on target comment! God Bless You..I will be praying everything go perfect for you! -ready_2_live:thumbup:

It is amazing what a few encouraging words can do! You guys answer so fast! THANK YOU so much! You are all so right...THANK YOU! I can go to sleep soundly now! God Bless! P.S. I LOVE this forum already!

No no places...oh I laughed aloud and my husband just looked over and said what is so funny? That was SOOO cute! I can't quit laughing!