FluffySaysForkIt!

My why is... I want to be able to do the gardening and horse back riding I love. Like a lot of people on here the daily "will I fit that" or "can I even do that" has got to go!

And yet I have never seen an unkind post from Frustr8.... Something that you might consider.

That's so awesome!!! Thanks for sharing the picture- love to see that! Congrats!!!

Hi! Thanks for starting this! I have a surgery date of June 3rd for RNY. I am 48, a mom to two great boys and have been married to my high school sweetheart for 28 years. I am an elementary education teacher and a special education specialist, though I have taken time off while the kids are/were in school. I decided to do this because I have sleep apnea, high BP and my family is strongly diabetic. At 5'8 and 275 pounds it was time to get real, without some serious changes this was not going anywhere good. Really looking forward to hearing from everyone as we move forward!

I would not put up with rudeness either. I am so sorry you had that experience and I am really glad you found Mercy. What I meant was that, some people, (didn't mean you or anyone else in particular) really need that big emotional connection with their Doctor. And that is totally cool. I am just not that way is all. Only speaking for myself and some decision processing I made before even choosing a surgeon. By saying the Doctor can be a jerk as long as he is competent, I meant my feelings don't get too hurt by a shitty bedside manner. Sadly, lots of Doctors who are great at what they do aren't so great at the patient relations part. Thankfully I don't have to worry about that with Dr. Smolik!

I can second that. 😊😊 Though, to be honest, I never worried about wether i would like my surgeon. (I happen to, luckily.) I figured the surgeon just needed to be skilled, and if he was a jerk so be it. What I think is most important is the support staff, particularly the nurses, as those are the people who are the heart and soul of the team. The nurses at this office are phenomenal, without exception...

Good luck to you and I hope that you get the answers you need soon.

Sounds like you are on your way! Good luck!

Sorry, speaking only for myself, I misunderstood when you asked for "suggestions." So, I "suggest" no, it's not typical. Lol. Sounds like you already had the only "next step" you can expect and will be calling. Anything else step wise would be so dependent on your particular team and pretty hard for anyone else to give much input on right now. Good luck to you!

Interesting question! I decided that the way I could know if I felt I was enabling or supporting was by looking at my own motivation. For me, true support is ALWAYS a totally selfless act. Zero ego involved. No "well this is good for me" , "this shows that I am an expert" or I am getting some other charge out of this. It doesn't write someone off as hopeless, but it isn't always warm and fuzzy either. True support sees the needs of others and is willing to meet that need with compassion and, if need be, couch that compassion in "Hey! Your ass is hanging in the wind, cover that up!" Enabling, on the other hand, seems to me to come from a point of helping one's self out in some way. Such as the person bringing pizza to someone they KNOW shouldn't eat it to avoid conflict with them. Or Saying on this forum "Sure! Eat fried chicken 10 min after surgery" because you don't want to be the "bad guy". Abuse always is motivated by frustration/anger and (quite often on here anyway) ego too. That said, one man's "abuse" might be another person's "straight shooting". I have seen people use "straight shooting" as an excuse to verbally mow people over when the same message could have been said with a lot less carnage. I have also seen people feel abused by what I thought was pretty gentle truth sent their way Perception is everything and, since I can't control that in others, I will try to run what I say through my own filter, do my own "straight shooting" through that, and hope for the best.

I guess my response would be: "I know you love me and want the best for me. I hope you will take some time to learn about this process and the struggle I am facing because I could really, really use some positive support from you." However, If she really can't BE positive, or even just better educated, you will need to make peace with that fact and hold true to what you know is right. (Maybe even in the face of some outright hostility. Often the people closest to you fear big change because of perceptions of how it will affect THEM.) Continue on, find other supportive people if you need to, and just take care of YOU. Your job is not to convince others if this is process is easy, hard or anything else. Your job is to find a way back to your best life... and no one else's opinions get to decide the path that gets you there but YOU. 💙

Congratulations to you! So glad you are here to share your story! You look happy, healthy and (best of all) like a guy who makes the most of his miracles.

I like the Isopure Infusions Light fruit flavor tropical punch. Just be sure to mix it in a blender bottle (NOT a mixer!) and let it sit for 5 minutes or so as it foams up before it gets clear. They sell it in GNC stores or probably in the store on this site too. Also like several of the fruit flavors of the Nectar brand. There is a variety pack you can buy to test them out. Sold on this site too. Most people will say not to stock up on any one thing if you are pre-surgery as your tastes can change quite a bit after.

Yep, call them! Sometimes things just fall through the cracks. You are not asking for anything other than the information they promised to contact you with. Go get em!

Well, I am officially APPROVED and scheduled for my RNY on June 3rd! For those of you that saw my introduction, I had mentioned that I had a weird insurance deal (small company policy) that made it questionable as to how long of a supervised weight loss was required. It was written as if it was 12 months, and I kind of settled into that in my mind as just how it would be. However, my insurance nurse is awesome. She really stepped up for me and worked so hard to clear the road blocks. Amazing.... So now I have a kind of mental whiplash, but a good one! Feeling excited, nervous and above all else, BLESSED.

Hi! Yes they really are. Glad to see someone from the same surgeon's group here! Welcome!

Wow! You have been through the ringer! Glad you are getting the surgery you need now, best of luck to you.

Welcome! Congratulations on starting your journey! I am not required to lose weight, I just can't gain. I will be doing the 2 week liquid diet before surgery.

I am so disgusted by this nurses behavior. This was more than "rude". She harassed you because of her own bias and ignorance. This kind of person WILL do this again. She has,no doubt, treated others she deemed unworthy of simple human kindness in other distressing ways too. Please take action by reporting exactly what you listed here. I honestly think you may save someone else not only the rude behavior but possibly physical harm from either lack of medical care or out right abuses.

Congratulations! That is an amazing accomplishment in 8 months!

My blood work was done before submitting to insurance. I can't speak for every type of insurance, but BCBS of North Carolina wanted to know that I did not have some underlying condition with my thyroid that would be a factor in weight gain. A TSH blood test measures thyroid levels (free T4) and was part of a routine blood workup that was done. I may have to do more blood work right before surgery, not sure.

I am so sorry you are struggling with the insurance. I think the advice of seeing about comorbities might be a good option. Sleep apnea, high blood pressure and some others can help make it so the lower BMI you have is not an issue. Keep fighting! I hope you get good news soon!

That sounds awful! So glad you were able to get some insurance that wasn't so ridiculous and get it done! Also- I LOVE the "but did you die" LOL!

So, I got to thinking about a female name.... How about Katniss? As in Katniss Everdeen the main character from (what else) The Hunger Games.

Summer56- I look forward to reading about you meeting the goals you have set for yourself. You are on your way! You have already begun building that vision for your future right now, one step at a time. and I love that you are celebrating that- because it IS worth celebrating!!! Way to go!