I think we all feel guilt and shame at times. For me it is most of the time. I feel great when I lose weight and then I gain it all back and feel like such a failure. I feel for you and hope you get all you want out of this surgery. You deserve to have a happy healthy life doing things you want to do. I'm not sure why we can't be kind to ourselves. You know deep inside this is not your fault but you can take control and concur the weight beast. I wish you all the luck in the world.
Well crap, I hate when that happens. Do you have any music with you? Or a game on your phone. anything to take you mind somewhere else. It will make the time go faster. And you won't just be thinking about the surgery.