Sheribear68

Thanks for the encouraging words and advice everyone. Lol, I did the Botox thing once in my early 40’s (I’m 53) and my kids were relentless. They would intentionally do things to make me angry so they could laugh at me when I couldn’t scowl at them. I love the smaller version of me, but all the “droopyness” EVERYWHERE is really getting on my nerves. I’m definitely not a fan of fillers, I just want the saggy skin gone. I will start trying to get some before and after pics going soon. I’m definitely going to want to chronicle my plastics journey. Like so many people here, I’ve become a pro at hiding the excess skin, but many times that game gets tiring. I’m a wimp when it comes to pain, but I’m so over this extra skin that I don’t care anymore.

Hello everyone, I’m a little more than 3 years post VGS. I lost 125 pounds. Went from a size 24 to size 6 and have managed to maintain within a 5-8 pound window for the past 2 years. I’m a health care worker, so needless to say I’ve been a bit busy for the last 2 years. I’ve managed to save up for the plastics I want since my VGS ( 2 straight years of all the overtime I could work helped) and I’m now about 6 weeks away from the magic date. Me and my PS have decided on a TT with flank lipo, and a thigh lift. I’m a bit nervous about doing all of this at once, but I’ve only got one shot at getting the time off of work so it all has to be one surgery. I’m 5’7”, about 142-147, size 6-8 and in relatively good shape for a 53yo. Anyone else with my size range do this ? I’d love some tips and pointers. Oh yeah, because I can never do anything the “easy way” I will be in a walking boot due to some foot surgery I will be having 3 weeks prior to the plastics. The foot surgery is the only reason I will be able to be off work so it has to piggy-back off of that.

My sleeve is so unpredictable. I’ll have days where I swear I can eat like a “normal” person and I honestly forget I’m sleeved. Then I’ll have days where a boiled egg fills me up for hours and I have zero interest in eating. What’s even weirder is that my husband- who has NOT had any bari surgery- eats a lot like me and sometimes he runs into restriction. Tonite we had date night and went to one of our favorite pubs. We split a chicken sandwich with fries, each had 1 cocktail and 1 beer. We didn’t even manage to finish half of our halves of the sandwich and also failed to drink over half our beers! We laughed that we were failing so bad at splurging. One thing that is kind of alarming me is that my acid reflux seems to be kicked in overdrive lately. I’m about to really clean up my eating and drinking prepping for this next foot surgery, so I’m hoping to catch a break from the constant heartburn. I really, really, really am happy with where I am and the LAST thing I want is a revision due to this reflux. I love my sleeve— I don’t want a pouch. I don’t have the best tips to remember to drink water bc I guzzle down 2/3 of my daily water before I eat for the first time of the day. I’ll literally have around 60 ounces of water between waking up and eating around 10-11 am, then drink maybe 12-16 more the whole rest of the day. It tends to leave me feeling somewhat dehydrated by bedtime, but bedtime is when I will “treat” myself to my Coke Zero. My hair never really came back. It’s still fairly thin, but I will never regret having the VGS. Good God, I hope the kidney stone thing never happens to me: I’m a wimp when it comes to stuff like that.

Thanks for the input! I’ve heard horror stories of people looking pregnant for months afterwards or horrible infections, always having to wear compression, etc… From the time I was 13, I’ve had the most horrible legs/thighs. Even now at a size 6, I’ve got thunder thighs that are half cellulite, half hanging skin. Add in my loose tummy skin and I’m jealous of ET’s body. I’ve got a very strong core thanks to yoga and pilates and my PS said he doesn’t think I will need any kind of muscle repair. If you pull back my tummy skin, I’ve actually got some impressive abs! I’ve had 2 kids, but no C-sections so that’s good. Also, many of the horror stories are from women who had a much higher BMI going into plastics than I have. I’m mostly worried about how the thigh lift will go. I’ve purchased a few professional summer dresses that I can wear compression shorts under for when I’ll go back to work, which will be 3 weeks PO. If I have a good experience with this and like the work, I’m totally saving up for a facelift within the next couple of years. Lol, work and save. Have surgery. Work and save. Repeat. 🤣

Okay so lets both take a deep breath together and break some of this down: Almost everyone here is here because we’ve had a history of eating/food/metabolism/addiction/toxic relationship issues. Maybe I’ve left a couple of things out, but that’s a good starting place. Let me start by saying that I’m now 3 years and 2 months from VGS. I had exceptional results. Lost over 100% excess fat, exceeded everyone’s expectations, and have more or less maintained. I lost 135 pounds in 9 months. Went from 267-132 (SW was 246). I’ve managed to maintain between 137-147 in the last 2 years after the free-fall dropped me down to 132. I was a hot mess at 132– BMI was right at 20% and people asked me all the time if I was sick. What I’m saying is the 10 pound “regain” is okay because I know that’s where my body needs to be. That being said, it’s still work. I still have to monitor what/how much I put in my mouth. Sometimes I tend to drink too much and I realize I’m using alcohol as a sub for food and then I stop and regroup. Sometimes I will find myself emotionally eating and have to stop and regroup. Sometimes I’m having a bad day or I’m on vacation and I just don’t give a damn. Afterwards I will stop and regroup. Only you (working with a therapist) can help deal with those habits, recognize them either during or after, then course correct. YOU do have all the power. Families can and will be toxic. If at all possible, have an exit strategy when it becomes too much. Have a go-to that doesn’t involve comforting with food and do that activity. Even if it’s as simple as putting on earbuds and listening to a guided medication. Even if you can’t physically exit the room. Also, I’m going to recommend that-for the short term at least-you’re going to have to let a certain amount of it roll off of you. You have decided a change is needed, but others aren’t compelled to go along with. In a perfect world, they would, but none of us got morbidly obese by living in a perfect world. I’m going to come out front and tell you that you WILL lose friends over this. There will be some relationships that WILL NOT be the same. They might end forever. You are about to embark on an amazing, difficult, rewarding, trying, and fantastic journey. It will be ugly at times. You will have highs and lows that will give you whiplash. You will not be the same person next year that you are this year. You MUST be prepared for all of this and be willing to embrace the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s okay to vent. This is one of the safest spaces ever so vent away unapologetically. I’m trying my best to take my own advice because I’ve got plastics set up for May and my husband and my son are the only other two people on the planet who are aware I’m going to do this. I’m keeping it a secret from the rest of my family because of how many of them reacted when I had WLS. If any of them notices (somewhat doubtful as I can hide a LOT of skin under my clothes and nobody is going to see me naked) I will tell them after the fact - unapologetically and with a challenge in my tone. That challenge will remind them of how far and how successful I’ve become since I started this journey in early 2018. You’ve got this. We are here to help

I work right across the street from a Panera! I love to order the Cobb, sub in ranch instead of green goddess, subtract picked onions (too much sugar) and add extra chicken. I can make this salad last for 2 lunches that way!

3 years, 2 months post VGS. I’ve gotten so used to my new stomach that I barely even register it anymore, but sometime we will go out to eat and I’ll get sad about how little I can still eat. Running errands last week, got hungry and decided to have some Mediterranean salad. It’s amazing how well this tool works even years later.

Hello February 2019 peeps! I’m doing okay. Gained 15 back from my all-time low, but maintaining within a 5-ish pound window now for about the last 15 months. Some days I wonder if I should try to get back into the 130’s ( I dropped all the way down to 133 at one point) but I’m hanging in the upper 140’s and feel like this is maintainable. For me, 2022 has been dubbed “The Year of the Foot” as I’ve already had one bunionectomy and will be having my left foot done next month. I was very happy to only gain 2 pounds in the 7 weeks I laid on my butt all day long with foot elevated. So here is me at 147 at my daughters wedding reception on March 5th. I was rocking a size small dress and- of course- my walking boot. I’m super excited to say that on May 10th I will be having plastics!! I’ve saved up and will be having a TT with flank lipo and a thigh lift. We are going to piggy-back it 3 weeks after foot surgery so I can minimize my time off work. Hope everyone is well. I miss you guys.

Exactly! Instead of beating ourselves up for not reaching our goal weight, we should focus on how much we have accomplished! And for most of us, the original goal weight was a fairly arbitrary number. The important thing is that you are way healthier than you were two years ago. Congrats! Well if we’re doing confessions, I’ll admit that I can have mimosas (yes, plural) and not suffer. Weird story, but I actually ran into my bariatric surgeon at a padel ball tournament last fall. Weirder still, my husband and I got paired up against him and his wife. Mimosas and breakfast burritos were flowing and my bari-surgeon himself poured me a mimosa after our match! I told him I either had room for the mimosa or the burrito and his response was “damn surgeons, can’t trust ‘em” Lol, I chose the mimosa 🤣 Hope everyone is doing well So far I’m hanging into the high 130’s and I too think that I look much better now with 5 extra pounds on. I seem to be in constant flux-regaining then losing the same 5-7 pounds. I’d like it if I had a bit more consistency, but as long as I can keep within my window I’ll take it.

I’ve wondered this as well. I started off with a BMI of exactly 41% and was able to (and still currently maintain) a BMI of 20-21%. I lost well over 100% of my excess fat, which my bari surgeon admitted is outside his “typical” results, but he also admitted he was fairly confident going in that I would achieve it based off of my history, psych evaluation, and our personal interviews. That being said, he and his team always point-blank refused to set a goal weight or BMI in front of me and I know that many clinics don’t Mostly I think that’s because we need to shoot for our own goals and limits— not the limits that someone else thinks we can or cannot do. I was so paranoid that I was going to be a spectacular failure at WLS, but ended up being a pretty spectacular success.

Glad to see everyone is doing so well I lost down to under 130 last April at the start of the pandemic. I’ve gained about 5-7 pounds and stay generally between 133-138. I hit 142 right after the holidays, and went strictly bari-keto with IF and now I’m sitting at 137. The first shot was when I dipped down below 130 and I feel like I look quite skeletal. The second shot is from late summer, and the 3rd shot is from a few weeks ago (I was probably 3-4 pounds “heavier” than I am currently.) Sorry I’ve been gone for so long, but it’s been a rough last year and unfortunately the frenetic pace isn’t slowing down for me. I’ve had 2 days off since January 1st with no end in sight

Okay, so I’ve got to vent and y’all are my online therapists, don’t ya know? How many of you can point to several relationships that have been changed for the worse by WLS? I’ve got many fans and supporters, but there are a few friends who I swear treat me like I’ve got the plague now. The latest in particular is a friend who lives in the next state. She’s got elderly parents here and comes every few weeks to check on them. Long story short, they just sold their house to live in assisted living and my friend was here a whole week. In the past, she’s come through for Easter, July 4th, and other random visits, yet I never find out about them until it’s too late to get together. This time—knowing it was going to be emotionally rough for her— I offered to help out in any way possible and she said “sure”. Then I proceeded to hear nothing from her about getting together until I finally broke down and texted to see how she was holding up emotionally and did she need me to bring her anything/take her out to dinner/buy her a bottle of wine, etc.... The response was that she was packing up to head home and would be too busy. Now I’m trying not to be paranoid, but before I had WLS, this never happened and I know for a fact that another mutual friend (who is still MO) took her to dinner the other night. My friend is MO and has been for her whole adult life. The only reason she even knows I had WLS was because we met back at the start of March and i confessed why I couldn’t really eat much (I was only 4 weeks PO then) Funnily enough, that’s the last time we’ve seen each other face to face. I’m trying my best to give her the benefit of the doubt, but it’s really getting tough to do that.

Wow guys. These posts really resonate with me: I gained 110 pounds when I was pregnant with my daughter (2nd child) and the abuse I took from their father still haunts me. That’s the baby that changed my whole metabolism and all I got from him was quiet disappoint and criticism In the weight gain and subsequent PPD. By the time she was 3, I found out that their father was having an active affair with one of my coworkers and that basically everything I had been struggling with had been used against me and that the 2 of them were plotting to try to get custody of the kids. They were actually using my new-found Morbid Obesity as a weapon against me to “prove” that I didn’t have the self-control necessary to raise 2 kids under the age of 6 as a single mom. I fought sooooo hard that year and in years after, trying to fix what was “broken” in me only to fail over and over and over again. Thankfully I had enough of a career and enough self-esteem to survive that onslaught and make it through. Those were several tough years where I was reminded painfully over and over that I wasn’t good enough-or desireable enough, smart enough, or like able enough to be considered a “good” parent and I was reminded on a monthly basis that it was going to be a a WAR of 2 vs 1. I somehow persevered and got those kids raised. I spent over 13 years single and afraid to even think about having a life of my own. I survived breast cancer as a single working mom. At that point, my biggest fear was dying before I could finish raising those kids— aged 16 and 12 when I was diagnosed. The kids dad stopped paying child support after our first year divorced and I was afraid to even take him to court bc I didn’t feel worthy enough to raise my kids as a MO single mom in her mid-30s. When I think of the years lost due to my feelings of inferiority, it almost makes me sick. I wasted almost 13 years of my life feeling like a sub-par human and thankfully my current husband saw me— the true me— underneath all of that baggage. He loved me— plus sized and all— in spite of me not loving myself. It took that brave and kind man’s love to realize that I could be so much more than the reality that I was currently living. With his love and respect and complete acceptance, I was able to start this journey that has led to where I am now. Ironically, my ex is a mere shadow of the man he once was— he won’t call or reach out to his kids and I’ve heard that he and that woman live a very small and petty existence where neither of them are fulfilled or even remotely happy. If I were a better person, I would feel pity for them, but I must honestly admit that I do derive some satisfaction from their misery. At the end of the day though, my best revenge is to live my best life as happily as possible, and I plan on doing that every. Single. Day.

I recently read, and can't find, an article about real longevity as it relates to a restricted calorie diet and how the body naturally thrives on calorie restrictions when the diet is based on nutrient density and whole foods mostly plant and Protein based. Lots of talk about reversing chronic disease and inflammation metabolic syndrome and people living into their 90 and 100s and having health and energy using this method. Primarily low calorie and high nutrition density. Dr Joel Furman has some great books about this. Yes, and I forgot to mention that I have intermittent fasting in my toolbox along with my sleeve and I feel like not only does the IF naturally restrict calories,but the other health benefits might greatly contribute to extending life span

Okay so I want to urge caution and patience here. I too got freaked out a few weeks ago with my continued loss and then I finally realized that should embrace it I mean, I’ve been fighting a war with my body for over 2 decades and I’m sick and tired of it. So for 20+ years I couldn’t lose enough and now I’m gonna stress bc I had WLS and I’m losing “too much??” Nah, instead I’m just gonna relax and see where this ride stops. I talked to my NUT last month and she reassured me that my body won’t let me die, and I just had my 1 year labs done and they are BEAUTIFUL! I have zero deficiencies and personally I feel better than I’ve ever felt before. I now that I’ve spent almost 2 months

5’7”, female, 51YO, 13 months post VGS. HW: 262 SW: 246 GW: 155 CW: 134-137 MANY of us who are WLS all start in different places and have had different routes getting there. I personally think that the human body is a wonderful and mysteriously frustrating thing. As an adult, spent many years “normal” or slightly “under normal” body weight. It was only when I hit my late 20’s that I became MO. And stayed there for 22 years. When I had WLS, I had to maintain my BMI (which was hovering right at 40) for 8 months so I could stay qualified. I’d love to see insurance companies lower that number to 35, because I could’ve been practicing healthier habits in the months leading up to WLS rather than INTENTIONALLY trying to keep my weight >252. My point here is that I hit a “normal” BMI fairly rapidly-within 8 months of WLS- and I’m now struggling to keep my weight over 135. I feel like most of that was because I had a lower-than-typical SW, and that my body “remembers” being a skinny girl as a teen and young adult and therefore when I got my resetting from WLS, my body adjusted beautifully. I’ve lost >110 pounds from my surgery date, which is way over 100% EBF. I’m not a super-hero, I just happened to be a girl who (mostly) followed what her team recommended, worked out, and did my homework daily,weekly, and monthly to get and stay on track. Honestly it take me getting creative some days and I still struggle trying to get in >1000 calories sometimes bc I refuse to eat crap. Other than dealing with a weird tomato and Kimchi craving right now, I’m not feeling deprived at all.

I’m actually about to do that. The Pilates studio has asked me to do a testimonial and I’ll be doing some of that.

It means 5 days weekly I’m closely monitoring my calories and macros and practicing intermittent fasting. 2 days a week I relax a bit, let myself have a couple glasses of wine and open my eating window (if I want) to 10-12 hours

Quick question guys: What is y’all’s typical breakdown of macros? My March goal is to be diligent in getting my macros more in line with where I think I need to be. Right now, this is my breakdown:

Congrats everyone for hitting their 1 year post-op milestones and thanks everyone for sharing your journey. I had a fabulous weekend, and I’m fluctuating between 134-137 right now, which is all I could’ve ever hoped for and more. Included are a couple of pics that a year ago would’ve had me floored to see. Thursday night hubs and I treated ourselves to a thunder game (yes, that’s a glass of white wine and it was my splurge day) and the next is from Sunday when we went to a new park in town. The weather was in the 70’s and I overdressed out of fear of getting out and about and being cold. Lol, need to figure out how to dress for the spring and summer months coming ahead, which will honestly require a new wardrobe.

Saturday morning Pilates

Everyone looking FAB as always. Tonite I actually got dressed in something that was not work or work out clothes. Hubs and I treated ourselves to a Thunder game. Lol, I haven’t been to one since last April and I had already consigned all of my old Thunder gear and had nothing “official” to wear: Anyway, I came up with this outfit out of my closet, but for sure this weekend I’m buying something for next time.

My team just refuses to give me solid parameters. Like now I’m 135 pounds and their reaction is “meh, don’t panic, your body won’t let you die. Oh yeah, but still don’t consume >40 gm total carbs in a day”. They never would help me set a GW, and they refuse to tell me a recommendation now. My NUT did confirm that they see a lot of people gain back 10-15 pounds in year 2 though. Gonna stay extra vigilant that that doesn’t happen.

Oh count me in the zero-Butt club also. I guess I just don’t mind it as much tho. Hubs and I finally getting a date-day. Hitting a couple of museums in town and then will have dinner for two later. Edit to add:  I did pull my Medusa hair up in a ponytail later. This was after I had just washes/dried it. 🤣🤣

Yes to all of this! I actually find myself craving the lighter, healthier and VLC food choices more now than ever. I myself don’t make the most perfect choices every day, but I do plan out 4-5 days weekly and even then I don’t get in all my food I’ve planned. I actually find myself eating LESS than planned most days because i still have a “fat brain and eyes”, so what I think I can eat turns out to be more than I can actually eat. The good news about that though is that I’ve got loads of protein, healthy bats and slow-carbs in my diet and those keep me happy and filled up and not at all feeling deprived. Food was definitely synonymous with “love” in my household and that’s a tough one to get over. Lol, knowing fluffy’s family history is cool bc now I know where she got some of those mad cooking skilz from. I was doing good at the age of 25 to make Mac and cheese. 🤣🤣🤣