ms.sss

I became obese after my second child at 25. I miss my smaller self and that is the person I recognize. Even though my body would get bigger my face had remained the same. 5 years ago my face left me and has been swallowed up by another face. It has been a difficult change. I have shut out old friends because I don't want them to see what I have turned into. Just joined today and I couldn't bring myself to post my own pic. Maybe after I can post a before/after pic I will feel more comfortable. I am hoping that by the beginning of July I can have surgery.

I made it! In almost exactly 10 weeks! I’m thrilled!

I’m starting to see the big differences. Felt it for a while, but now how a visual! Loving it. My wife has lost a good bit too!! She eats what I eat and it’s also helped her.

First NSV - Looked at my poor bruised (blood thinner injections), scarred, and stretchmarked stomach and apron and felt sorry for them instead of angry with then for the first time. Reclaimed them as part of me rather than the disgusting traitors and have begun moisturising and looking after them along with my other overlapping and swinging bulgy bits. Accepted they'll still be there albeit deflated, so may's well be at peace with them :-)

HW: 263
SW: 256 (21st Jan)
CW: 238

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DAY 14
Happy Valentine's Day! No chocolate candy, Cookies or cake has passed these lips today! I don't have a favorite poem, howeverI have another favorite quote. "You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough." Mae West

To those who have said they look forward to summer it has given me some hope for many things including not sweating my way through everything in summer and not sweating when I am asked to do presentations for work. Part an anxiety flop sweat cos it involved standing up in front of a 90% male dominated group of peers to be judged, and part a fat sweat cycle as venues were always boiling and knowing how bad the sweating fat woman optic was made me sweat more, and so on.

If that cycle gets broken it will be worth every gas pain, pureed meal, and frozen extremity.

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Feb. 13th:
A Poem I absolutely love is Cotton candy on A Rainy Day
Don't look now
I'm fading away
Into the gray of my mornings
Or the blues of every night
Is it that my nails
keep breaking
Or maybe the corn
on my second little piggy
Things keep popping out
on my face or of my life
It seems no matter how
I try I become more difficult
to hold
I am not an easy woman
to want
They have asked
the psychiatrists . . . psychologists . . .
politicians and social workers
What this decade will be
known for
There is no doubt . . . it is
loneliness
by Nikki Giovanni
I fell in love with her work during Grad school. Poignant and unapologetic.
Somewhere I'd love to be right now is Jamaica, warm with the fam.

FEB 12: I am creative and it comes out in many ways. One of them is my baking and homemade bday decorations! My daughter's 7th bday was space themed this year.
Also, for the record, I am also doing the writing prompts but keeping them private. I'm more honest about things if I do it that way.

All you need is consistency to get the results you want. Be consistent with your food plan (Look at food as fuel) Be consistent with the workout plan of your choice.
Google fitness/exercise ideas. the choices are endless. walking, zumba, Water aerobics, HITT, powerlifting, bodybuilding, cycling, running, yoga, playing sports, hiking. Try them out to see what keeps you moving.
Getting started:
https://www.verywellfit.com/best-workouts-if-youre-overweight-3495993
Paula Bee Fit - youtube workout series - She is my fave!
https://www.youtube.com/user/PahlaB1
Weight lifting
https://www.bodybuilding.com/workout-plans/
https://www.bodybuilding.com/category/women
https://www.bodybuilding.com/exercises/
running
https://www.runnersworld.com/
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.active.aps.c25k&hl=en_US
Yoga for beginners
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=yoga+for+beginners

Zumba:

Beginner Zumba
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=beginner+zumba+routiens
Advanced zumba
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=advanced+zumba+routiens
I love zumba because I feel like a kid. I have no rhythm..But I can dream.

I am wondering how many calories you folks out there are/were eating at 3 months?
A couple weeks ago at my 3-month followup, my nutritionist seemed to be more concerned about volume and wants me to eat x ounces of Protein, fats, grains, etc...or at least strive to, since I am apparently not eating close to what she wants me to yet. Now today, my lab work came back and the nurse called to say I'm all good across the board, so I figure I've been eating/doing ok. My body seems to be satisfied with the amount of food/number of calories I've been getting in these days and I don't feel like eating any more than that.
Soooo....how many calories where you getting in at 3 months out? Also, if you are/were exercising to offset that amount.

Thanks everyone... lots of great suggestions and ideas. Except maybe the anchovies 😆

1. I WEIGH LESS THAN MY HUSBAND!!!!!!!
2. I have decided to claim I have "finally lost the baby weight" if anyone asks. My daughter is 23
3. That is all - just wanted to share my joy today.

#5 Ok, what my friends would say about me - witty, generous, honest (to a fault)
something that makes me happy - I guess posting pictures of all the food I can't have anymore would be bad, right? I'm going to go with Sakura Matsuri --and just plain old cherry blossom season in general. I think it is one of the prettiest natural occurrences and it always reminds me of the wonders of the world no matter how gloomy I am feeling. This picture is from 2010, me and the hubby resting under a tree, talking about me starting to lose weight so that we could have a kid. I never got to lose that weight then, but I found out I was pregnant a few weeks later.

First, let me say that this week I got my first, "I didn't recognize you!" from a coworker I hadn't seen since before the surgery. (I could tell something was weird because she was acting oddly shady toward me during the first part of the meeting, and then suddenly became normal several minutes later. Must have been when she put 2 and 2 together.)
Anyway, on to the terrifying and hilarious NSV. So I'm walking rapidly down this long, empty hall at work and focused on the door all the way at the other end. I'm trying to take a quick bathroom break and I don't have a lot of time. I kinda glanced down to check my path ahead of me (since I'd previously been focused on the door and not watching where I was walking) and as I glanced down I suddenly saw something scurry around my feet. We've been known to have the occasional mouse in the building and I live in the midwest where it has been bitterly cold, which can push critters inside. Naturally, I freak out and do a little jig and start looking around, but I see nothing.
I'm not sticking around to meet a mouse if I don't have to, so I start power walking to the door/end of the hallway and I see it scurry by my feet AGAIN! Suddenly, before the panic set in, a realization set in and I test my theory by walking slowly at first, then faster. Yep. It's my own feet. I can now see my own feet when I walk because my stomach has shrunk in size. No mice. Just my own damn feet. 🤣

Day 1...
RNY Feb 20, 2018; still losing VERRRRY slowly...
Feb 1st weight: 147.2 lbs
Feb Challenge Goals:
a) Complete No Junk food Challenge
b) Partially Complete Exercise Challenge
d) Partially Complete the Public Self-Love Challenge (I'm gonna half ass this as usual. Good luck with getting facial recognition on me. I don't intend to give you that many target points. ha! As if! Take that Google and FB!)
Feb Weight Goals:
1) 144lbs : this will move me out of the "overweight" BMI range and into healthy. I was there for a hot minute one day (after a huge poop. So here's hoping to see that again!
2) 140 lbs : this will take me all the way to Goal #2. I haven't been 140lbs since I was 18 years old. (I wore a size 6 and thought I was so fat...*sigh*)

So I haven’t posted in a while but I’m so excited. I finally made it into onederland and I thought I’d come and share the good news !

HW: 262
SW: 245
CW: 199

Surgery was on Nov 1st. I feel like my progress is kinda slow even though my family tells me it isn’t. I’m just glad the scale is still moving in the right direction. 🤗

Well, I haven't met all my goals for this month. Primarily I wanted to break my evening snack habits. I'm better but not all the way there so I didn't lose as much as I wanted but I did break through another stall. I'm officially ending the month at 220lbs. That means I lost 15lbs this month and.....
I'VE OFFICIALLY LOST 101LBS!!!!!

PLEASE EXCUSE THE LONG POST :( Hi all. I had my first VSG consultation on 4/19/2018. My surgeon told me I would need to lose 100lbs during my pre-op stage (6 months required by insurance co) and prescribed phentermine. I lost 20lbs in 2 weeks but it gave me terrible side effects (depression, suicidal thoughts, insomnia) so I quit. At that point I was faced with calling my surgeon and asking for something else and I never did it. The week following that I tried intermittent fasting and lost another 10lbs. Then, foolishly, I thought to myself just as I had a million times before, “I can do this myself!” And when it came time for my next appointment, I didn’t go. I didn’t call and cancel, I didn’t reschedule, I just. didn’t. go. I was struggling very hard with the idea of ever telling my family. My sister Kayla lost all her weight through diet and exercise and has kept most of it off for years and years and would NEVER support the idea of me have surgery. She has my dad’s ear and he would listen to whatever opinion she had about it. I live with my dad and he’d always thought if I would just exercise more and eat less the weight would fall off. I hate myself for not going to that appointment. If I had persevered, I’d be sleeved by now and well on my way to my new life but instead I gave up. The fad diet again proved unsuccessful and I put all the weight back on and then some. I’ve been lost these past nine months trying to figure out what to do and then last week Kayla was home visiting and she handed me a stack of papers. She had gone to a WLS seminar, my skinny sister, and taken pages upon pages of notes. She had done research. She had prepared a speech to tell me it’s time for me to do something about this. Y’all, I CRIED. So now, tomorrow, I’m scheduling another consultation and I’m DOING THIS. I FINALLY have my family’s full support and most of all I’m ready. I’m ready to stop making excuses. I’m ready to stop saying no to going to certain restaurants because I can’t fit in their booths. I’m ready to stop telling my friends that the reason I can’t go to the amusement park is because I get sick on rollercoasters when the reality is that I don’t fit. I’m ready to stop saying no to vacations that require flight. I’m ready to stop researching weight limits on everything I buy. I’m ready to have a LIFE. I have never known what’s it’s like to be a normal weight. Not ever. I’m not delusional, I KNOW this will be one of the hardest things I’ll ever do but it will be so worth the struggle. I’m looking forward to sharing this journey.

You guys!!! I did it!
100 pounds down and it feels great! Dont get me wrong its been crazy hard and its hard to see the changes in my body but I know this will all be for the best!
im 4 months post op about 70lbs from surgery and 30 from before! Any ways just wanted to brag lol!

I'm floored at how far I've come. I was sleeved on 10/17/18 at 265. My starting weight was 275 (though my highest was above 300) and I'm only 5'5".
My personal goal was to lose 125 pounds, putting me at 150 pounds, and in the healthy BMI range.
Today I clocked in at 216.2. I've lost over 58 pounds and am less than 5 pounds from being halfway to my goal. I'll probably be at the halfway point in a couple weeks. I'm freaking floored. I have hope that I can get to 150 someday. I know things will probably start to slow dramatically after another few months, but I've been putting in the work and am happy to continue doing so, even when things slow down.
After all this worry and stress about following the plan and doing things right, and getting through stalls, I have found success, and I have hope.

My heaviest weight was 370.
In 2010 I had the band installed (such a mistake, waste of time, money and effort IMO)
March 10th, 2018 at my Pre-Surgical check in I was 310.
March 21st, 2018 at check in for surgery I was 294.4. I had the band removed and revised to the bypass.
Today, January 23rd, 2019. 308 days after surgery... I hit a number that I haven't seen in more than 20 years Onederland.
I'm down 95 lbs since surgery, 110.6 lbs from pre-surgical. And a staggering 170.6 lbs from my heaviest weight.

I need to thank so many people that if I tried, I'd forget someone and then we'd start with the hard feelings.
So I'll go with this.
Thank you.
If you've helped me through this in any way, shape, or form, Thank you.

Eating out-
There's almost always some form of grilled meat and I substitute veggies for the sides. Take home the leftovers. If I'm not headed home, I need to practice leaving the food behind. I'm still tempted to keep eating so that I won't "waste" it. Like me hauling around an extra 100 pounds somehow helped starving children in 3rd world countries.

Day 25 - keeping warm in winter! I use a double layer coat that can be worn 3 ways so it's super warm! Then since I'm always cold all the time these days, it's fleece tops, sweat pants, and an extra thick long fleece blanket. It does the job lol

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Well, although it feels unusual to Celebrate being "overweight" but I'm positive y'all know how that is an improvement from Obese.
5'9" and yesterday weighed 202.0 on the scale for a BMI for 29.8.
I'm shooting for the "1" by the end of the month. It will be awesome to say I weigh "One hundred xx"
Weight loss has slowed quite a bit, but I was 303# this time last year, and didn't get the surgery until July of 2018, so it is shocking how fast the weight is falling off.

Great cardio music!