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Everything posted by Jobber
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I received my surgery date today. I could not be more happy about it, the stars are seeming to align with all the obstacles I've had over the last 6 months to get to this point. It's a much greater feeling than i expected. Now comes nerves, doubt, and all the other things in advance of any kind of surgery, but I know I have this.
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Finished my 6th and final NUT appointment yesterday. Everything is done except the psych eval and submittal to insurance. I did everything required of me including the 100 pages plus of food tracking, I lost 5% of my total weight, and I went to every NUT appointment.
Hoping for the best, things seem to be lining up well for me and in the end, I think I will be able to fully have my wife on board with this whole thing. She says she is, but I know she doesn't think I should do it. Just like I replied to another post earlier, i'm doing this either way, it's my decision at this point and I know I can get her to come around at some point and maybe even convince her to look into it as well.
Also, I just started with an APAP machine a couple weeks ago and "holy sh*t" has my quality of life improved greatly so far. I wish I had looked into this years ago. I didn't think I had apnea until I had the study done and i stopped breathing an average of 12 times an hour. That's nuts...
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I went to my 4th NUT appointment this week and I was absolutely surprised that I had actually lost 9 pounds from my last appointment. I can get a bit obsessive when it comes to scale use so I've decided to only do pre-op weigh-ins at my monthly appointments. It saves me a lot of anxiety, I think.
I actually was prepared to go to the appointment with excuses on why i gained, so this was a big win. I didn't actually add much activity to my routine, the only thing I changed was having protein shakes every morning instead of just weekdays. I really thought my extracuricular snacking activities were going to cause an issue, but I'm not going to let that make feel like it's ok to snack late or keep eating cheese non-stop. Also probably helps that I had the stomach bug a couple days last week. I think my organs liquified and came out....yuck...
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I'm just over 3 months into my 6 month pre-op diet plan and I feel like giving up. Not because of the food, but because life is hard right now.
Work has become intolerable due to the amount of stress that I cannot control, but inevitably know will cause major issues for me down the road. Long story short it's one of those "I tried to tell you this was going to happen things" that nobody reacted to because of budget constraints, but in the end there's going to be a "fall man" for what happens and it will be me, despite my preventative warnings.
My boss is on my side, in theory, but when it comes down to protecting his own hide, I feel like he would sacrifice me to save himself.
Also, I just had to cancel my holiday vacation due to staffing issues in my department, so now my personal life is going to be affected by my work issues.
At this point, I'm just venting. I realize that there are people out there much less fortunate than myself, but it sucks all the same. I feel like everytime I get close to being happy with life, it comes and gives me a boot in the ass for a reality check.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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Going to my 3rd of 6 NUT appointments tomorrow. Between appt 1 and appt 2, I lost about 14 pounds, but I'm pretty sure that tomorrow I'm going to weigh in at either no change or will have gained weight. I haven't worked hard at all this last month and in some regards feel like I'm regressing.
My INS requires a 5% weight loss in 6 months, so it's not impossible to get back on track, just need to focus more. The only difference between last month and this month is that I've not been getting as much sleep at night and I think it's been contributing to my extra issues with snacking at night and general misbehavior.