Born in Missouri

Everything and nothing is normal. Words like ONLY aren't good friends either. What if overnight you lost 3lbs or more? Would you be asking the same question if that had happened? Don't do this to yourself. Please! The weight loss will happen. Do what you've been instructed to do and the pounds will come off. You'll just make yourself crazy if you keep up this mindset.

I think it's only natural to experience such feelings. We've made a drastic, often irreversible, alternation to our bodies. We're not feeling physically like ourselves. There may be pain or discomfort, vomiting, constipation, hunger, lack of hunger... and the list goes on. Probably even more involved are the emotional or psychological changes going on inside of us post-surgery. We know things will never really be the same. This can be both thrilling and terrifying. What if we are one of those weird weight-loss surgery outliers who doesn't lose weight for whatever reason?! We almost convince ourselves that after our first stall we are indeed one of those rare few! We've invested time, money, starved ourselves in preparation for surgery, had labwork, had to convince a nutritionist that we are committed to the nutritional challenges required, had to convince a psychologist that we aren't nuts, and go through 6 months or more of supervised weight loss by our primary doctor. We also read about all the pros and cons of WLS until our eyes practically bled from fatigue and overuse. Arghh! As for advice, it's pretty much the same advice for most wholesale changes we face. Time. Time heals, but time also moves so s l o w l y. Posting this topic and asking questions and for advice was a smart move. Just bringing the subject to the front of your consciousness validates it's importance to you. Some may dismiss "buyer's remorse" as an inconsequential little thing. I'd disagree. It's something we've all had to deal with to a varying degree, whether we're able to admit to ourselves or not. My advice is to keep thinking about upcoming goals... how you'll look in smaller clothing, how you'll feel when you finally weigh less than 200lbs, how it feels to eat half or a fourth of something and feel full. Hey, just creating a list of things to look forward to may help to counter that feeling of buyer's remorse. And, of course, leaving long, rambling comments like this one may help, too. Who knows?!

Thank you for expanding this information, elcee. I confined my list to the conditions outlined in the article. It was not meant to be an exhaustive list but a summary of what was mentioned in the article. Yes, awareness is key. Some may fault me for being "negative" by presenting some downsides of weight-loss surgery, but, I believe, that being prepared to make an informed decision with all available information and also being ready for unfortunate events post-surgery is not only practical but realistic.

I admire and respect nurses. Thank you for your service.

Don't be so hard on yourself, @MysteriousGal. Be proud of all of the victories you've had so far, all the things you've done right, and keep your eye on the prize... better health after your weight-loss surgery. While being honest with yourself about "cheating" is a good thing, don't tear yourself down in the process. You'll experience more ups and downs in the coming months, so be kind to yourself. You need you. Be better to yourself, and remember, to pay forward by helping others here, too.

Welcome, Jessica. I'm glad you broke out of your shell in order to join in. Now that you've crossed over to the other side, so to speak, you can be an inspiring source of information for others who are preparing to go through what you are currently experiencing. Pay forward by helping others. Not only does helping others feel good but, I believe, it truly helps each of us to be more triumphant with our own journeys. We've all started out by saying "hello". Now it's your turn to be a comfort to others in their time of need. While we all still need the wisdom and compassion of others from time to time, the best feeling is helping another person here get through their particular hardship. Again, welcome. You have so much to offer!

If it helps, I've noticed that you are more open to feedback now ---even when it's something you might not want to hear. That's a good sign. When you first posted months ago, you were very defensive... and, well, I wasn't exactly walking on eggshells with you either. Knowing your age (now), and that I'm old enough to be your mother, I feel a little bad for being so blunt with you... but, in truth, I probably would have been just as straight-talking with my own kids.

You're 6ft and your goal weight is 125lb? How did you arrive at that? Just curious. I'm still wondering if my goal weight is achievable. After four children, I'm not sure it's possible. I think I just like "how it looks" in print.

As for your family and friends being happy and proud of you, that's all well and good, but, ultimately, these feelings should be reserved for you alone. Your happiness and sense of pride should be front and center. The disappointment of others should never be a reason to proceed. There are certain decisions in our lives that belong only to us... and this is one of those decisions. I recall your inner debate about what you have qualms about giving up (caffeine, nicotine, drinking, and eating). If you're still hanging onto all of these "pleasures", I don't see how you can possibly be ready. You seem to still be at square one.

Bariatric surgery is not a quick fix for severe obesity. What comes after the actual surgery matters a lot too. Weight regain is normal and is not something to be ashamed about. But, hopefully, the amount of weight regain is minimal and can be managed. Bariatric surgery isn't like shopping at a convenience store. It requires a care team that appreciates and addressed the nutritional, psychological, physical activity and other challenges that occur in the years after the surgery. https://www.forbes.com/sites/brucelee/2018/10/22/what-happens-after-bariatric-surgery-makes-a-big-difference/#4e3dce3c29b1

How are you getting reports from the future??? 2108... that's intense! LOL @Matt Z Check back in 2108 to see if this study still rings true. Also, look for my new reality TV show (taking over the Kardashians' time slot) about my ability to predict the future. Watch out for tempting slider foods while tuning in to my show.

Strike two in one day. First, I mess up the date when identifying a study (2108), now I botch this title. I'm afraid to think what my third strike might have been had I posted another topic today. I had no intent to mislead. Thank you for pointing out my latest blunder. My new status may soon be ASPIRING BLUNDERIST.

Adults who experienced childhood abuse have different recovery needs after bariatric surgery than those who were not abused. Children who experience physical, sexual, or verbal abuse sustain long-term consequences, studies have found. Abuse, neglect, witnessing crime, parental conflict, mental illness, or substance abuse can create dangerous levels of stress that can impact healthy brain development. These Adverse Childhood Experiences can increase the risk for smoking, alcoholism, heart disease, and many other illnesses and unhealthy behaviors throughout life.

The brilliant and gentlemanly @James Marusek, a veteran of this forum, is very knowledgeable about essential oils and has conducted several experiments. Check it out: http://www.breadandbutterscience.com/Experiments_with_Essential_Oils.pdf

I heard about Poo-Pourri on this site. I bought the SPICED APPLE. I remember seeing a SECRET SANTA bottle at the store but didn't recall the scent. When I got home, I called the Poo-pourri people to ask about SECRET SANTA. The company representative answered immediately. It was a surreal conversation talking about poo. I mentioned Bariatric Pal as the place where I heard about their product. I also decided to visit their site. Hilarious! If you can handle scatological humor, you might enjoy this series of stories by women and their poo emergencies. https://www.poopourri.com/blogs/girls-do-poop https://www.poopourri.com

My daughter, a PharmD, told me that she makes her own essential-oil concoction, too. You could probably make 10 bottles of your own scent (and customized to your liking) for the same price as one 2fl oz bottle of Poo-Pourri. What is your recipe?

The poo-pourri guy I talked to on the phone said that their product consists of essential oils plus water. You spritz the toilet bowl BEFORE doing your business and it helps to control the odor before it dissipates into the room. Control the plume, control the room.

It's nice that your poo-pourri does your job decently. What is your job? (Just funnin' with you Matt.)

Thank you so much. Congrats on making 250! Try not to compare your progress though. We all lose at different paces. I know it can feel somewhat disappointing at times, when you're not seeing a lot of weight coming off. You're just dealing with other health issues, that are making things go at a slower pace. Don't beat yourself up about it. Just do what you can. Exercising sitting down, doing low impact exercises would be a good way for you to be active. Just don't over push yourself. I hope your new doctor will be able to help you. I'm rooting for your success! Update on my new primary. It turns out that she and my youngest son were in the same medical school class. She's a fresh, young doctor with a caring spirit. With a little more experience and confidence, she'll make a truly terrific doctor. (My son said she was a nice person in medical school.) Anyway, she believes in me... and is someone I think I can trust.

This is the first blood-draw I've had that looks at any possible deficiencies after my bypass. My next blood-draw is at six months. After that, it's yearly. Certain results suggested borderline anemia. Also, my B12 was 6,000 with 900 being the maximum in the normal range. From now on, I'm only planning to take B12 weekly instead of daily. Other than my Vitamin D (which is always low), everything seemed okay. My son helped me interpret the results; he's a medical doctor. I asked the nurse the same questions, but she wasn't able to answer them and she didn't offer to ask the doctor for me, so I didn't bother following up with her. At this three-month visit my doctor (who ordered the above labs during this visit) wanted to know four things: 1. Are you taking your vitamins? (Yes) 2. Are you eating your protein first? (Yes) 3. Are you exercising on a regular basis? (No) 4. I forgot the fourth question, but I remember him asking four. I think it was are you hydrating enough? (No) Dr. S--- was happy with the weight I've lost so far and was pleased that I'm not overly concerned with just pounds. I promised to find ways to exercise that doesn't focus on weight-bearing maneuvers. The three-wheel adult "tricycle" we have is recommended for someone under 200lbs, and I'm 228 now. I'm trying to picture myself rolling along our suburban oak-lined streets with a water bottle in my old-lady wire basket in the front of my trike.

I'm starting to suspect that the cramping I've been experiencing (in my left calf) for the last few weeks might be related to my knees. A blood clot was ruled out. The pain radiates up and down my entire left leg at times. It feels numb and tingly sometimes, too. I had both knees replaced when I was at my heaviest (303lbs). Now that I've lost a little under 50lbs, I'm wondering if my "new" knee isn't the source of that pain. Has anyone one else had knee replacements and then experienced pain in one or both legs after losing weight? Anyway, I'm planning to see my orthopedic surgeon and find out his take on this theory. The frustrating thing for me is that my pain meds don't even touch this pain. With the amount of morphine I take daily (for a chronically bad ankle), I'd normally not even notice pain elsewhere unless it was off-the-charts. This pain is severe.

Turns out that it wasn't my knees at all. I have a hereditary condition with my toes (they start turning from forward to the side. I've had the joints in my big toes fused together so they won't turn, but it's not doable with the others. I have an excellent podiatrist treating me and the best she can advise is "good shoes". In the meantime, the upper part of my left foot is numb. It contributes to my feeling off-balance. I've fallen several times. The worst time recently was while holding a very sharp snipping tool. I often know that I'm going down, so I try to prepare. With the tool, I made an effort to throw it clear of myself. The last thing I wanted was someone finding me bleeding out with a razor-sharp blade protruding from my neck. I don't necessarily have to trip on anything. I can just go down because my foot starts to develop that "sleepy-numb" feeling and I can't place it anymore. I've had to resort to a walker at times. A cane doesn't do enough. In the meantime, I'm losing weight. Less padding. And here I thought I'd fall less after losing weight. Bad luck, back timing, and unfortunate genes, I guess. Does anyone else have a problem with balance or falling?

A bezoar \ˈbē-ˌzō(ə)r \ is a hard solid mass of indigestible material that can build up over time and possibly cause an obstruction. Bezoars can be classified into four types depending on the type of material swallowed. Trichobezoars \ˌtrik-ō-ˈbē-ˌzō(ə)rz \ are composed of hair and are most commonly associated with patients who have a psychiatric disorder. Pharmacobezoars \ˌfärmə kō- bē-ˌzō(ə)rz\ are composed of undigested medication. Lactobezoars \ˌlaktō- bē-ˌzō(ə)rz \ are more commonly seen in neonates and are comprised of milk curd. The bezoar associated with gastric bypass is a post-operative complication called a phytobezoar \ˌfīt-ō-ˈbē-ˌzō(ə)r \. Phytobezoars \ˌfīt-ō-ˈbē-ˌzō(ə)rz \ are composed of undigested fiber from certain vegetables and fruits such as corn and grape skins. A gastric bypass patient’s stomach pouch is approximately the size of a golf ball. The outlet (or stoma) created in the stomach pouch is about the size of an M&M. The food a person eats must be able to pass through this narrow opening, which is why food must be chewed over and over. Patients heal at different rates and scar differently. For some patients, scarring at the pouch’s outlet can make this M&M-size passageway even narrower. This is a complication that a person cannot control. In the Roux-en-Y gastric bypass, a special type of cutting stapler is used when the stomach is divided to create the stomach pouch. This stapler is also used to divide the small intestine. As healing progresses over the first three to four weeks after surgery, scar tissue grows over the staples. If forbidden foods such as raisins are eaten before this stapled area is healed, it may lead to an obstruction. In the short-term, avoid foods like dried fruits, seeds, and nuts until one's staples are covered with scar tissue. Long-term, be mindful of foods such as corn or grapes which could create a phytobezoar \ˌfīt-ō-ˈbē-ˌzō(ə)r \. I had fun researching bezoars. I hope this helps even one person to make wiser -- and safer -- food choices.

You'll definitely find a goldmine of information here. Read, compare, question, and be a fearless self-advocate. We're here to help if you have specific questions, but no one can give a one-time post that would be enough to prepare you for everything you'd want or need to know. Don't be a stranger here. But do something. Take some action. Today. Right now. It's good that you were committed to exercise in the past because that will be a key part of your post-surgical regime if you decide to move forward. Oh, and.... welcome.