Born in Missouri

Photographs say it all. You deserve to feel proud. Thank you for trusting us with your progress. It's hard to put yourself out on display since some people can be brutally judgmental (as a mask for envy). I have a lot of respect for those who work hard to meet their goals. I feel inadequate in many ways because I know I'd never be able to walk 5 miles a day --- let alone 1/4 of a mile. I know there are exercises that don't involve weight-bearing maneuvers... still, I feel cheated by the post-op cramping in my leg and a chronic ankle injury that limits my ability to boost my weight loss with rigorous exercise. Yes, WLS is a tool, but when you can't do much in the way of productive exercise, it's like working with a dull tool. I didn't intend to turn this post into something about myself. Sometimes thoughts and frustrations take over. I am truly happy about your success and I hope that you reach all of your primary goals -- and your in-between goals, too.

Just recognizing your addiction to food is a monumental step. So many people are in denial about their eating. They blame society, other people, their past traumas, their thyroid, etc. I'm not saying that those things don't have an impact on an individual's weight, but they are rarely the main reason. It always goes deeper. It appears that you understand the struggle ahead of you and that in order to proceed you need to do so with your eyes wide open. Keep us posted.

@TexasMommy80 This is so much like my own story. I had two osteochondral lesions and a brevis tear (on my right ankle); however, that wasn't found out until I insisted on an MRI. After walking around on my "weight-related problem"* for almost a year ("just walk it off; it's just a sprain. Lose weight and it'll feel better"), the damage was compounded. Arthritis and other conditions had developed by then making matters worse. I eventually had ankle surgery, but the damage was already too extensive. The pain in my ankle is something I live with every day (and take morphine for). Had I been taken seriously, perhaps it would have never gotten to that point. By the way, two different ankle reconstruction surgeons have since told me "There's nothing more we can do, sorry." *My injury was related to a fall down some stairs. Actually, something in my ankle gave out and then I fell, but that wasn't important enough to know. My weight was "the real problem". Oh, and... my first MRI was one paragraph long. After of year of walking around on a seriously injured ankle without treatment, my MRI report turned into one and a half pages.

I think this was more about doctors who are presented with general conditions that might be something else. The woman in the article had cancer. Her complaints were dismissed as weight-related. Lower back pain and asthma are common co-morbid conditions among people with obesity. But what if your complaint was fatigue, pain, fever, indigestion, trouble swallowing, or a change in bowel habits or urinary function? Some symptoms are insidious. It's great that your doctors were attentive. I also think it's imperative for patients to be self-advocates, which is hard when you're being fat-shamed about your weight. If doctors are so afraid of saying things that might make their patients mad or unhappy, then perhaps they would be more inclined to run tests or not dismiss general complaints as weight related. It's hard to stand up to doctors. They can be intimidating. I can't do much about the specialists I see, but it's important to at least find a primary doctor that isn't a doorknob doctor (a doctor who has their hand on the doorknob during your visits) listens.

@Creekimp13 Thought your daughter might be interested in this tidbit. (I personally think I'll try food sources other than crickets to boost my gut microbes. How 'bout you?) A new clinical trial shows that consuming crickets can help support the growth of beneficial gut bacteria and that eating crickets is not only safe at high doses but may also reduce inflammation in the body. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/08/180803134654.htm

I found this link. It addresses whole fresh fruit, fruit juices, and dried fruit. https://www.nationalbariatriclink.org/bariatric-blog/eating-fruits-gastric-bypass-surgery/ "After Gastric Bypass Surgery, there will be things you have enjoyed your entire life that your body will no longer be able to digest without discomfort. You will also have to give up some things that may seem healthy such as fruit juices, which are actually high in sugar content. About half of all Bariatric surgery patients can dilute fruit juices such as apple and orange juice and enjoy a glass now and then. Keep a close eye on your goal weight though, as these juices can quickly send you backwards on the scale. Your stomach may not be able to handle dried fruits after Gastric Bypass or other weight loss surgeries, most particularly dried cranberries, apricots and raisins. Again, this is due to the high amounts of sugar used to cure these dried fruits. After some time has passed after your Bariatric surgery, you may be able to indulge in and tolerate dried fruits again but use caution, watching for sudden weight gain."

I could listen to that guy all day. Excellent presentation... and he's funny. Well worth my 36 minutes. (Crap. I forgot to check to see if he had any other videos.) I've been feeling down on myself for not being able to get all the protein that I was told I "needed" every day since my surgery. Some days I probably take in fewer than 250 calories. It's almost as though I have "willpower in reverse" which I assumed is bad. Now I suddenly feel fine about my 7weeks-out post-op. Here I thought I was stuck in starvation mode with my body burning muscle and spewing it out like lava from a volcano. Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! All I've been doing is a seven-week intermittent fast! And I've lost a little over 40lbs in the process. Yes, I definitely need to drink a lot more. Being dehydrated isn't doing my body any favors. And I'm taking my vitamins. That's good, too. Now I feel good about intermittent fasting as well. Thank you, MatchaGirl (aka Green Tealael) for sharing this mind-expanding video. I can't wait to share it with my oldest doctor son who struggles with his weight. His wife, also a doctor, struggles with her weight too. I've heard them talking about cutting calories and exercising more... with little to no results. When doctors don't even know how to lose weight, how are we to know?

@nevertoolate If you've read as many posts as you claim , then you would have definitely "heard" about Mr. Fart being your new best friend post-op. (And, yes, my farts are all male. The testosterone in my body is an expert at coordinating this activity-- and only this activity.)

@Matt Z Here's Ronnysgal's post.

Women, of course, get the double whammy. It's either our weight or it's all in our heads. When a man shows up at a doctor's office or the ER, they're taken more seriously. Here's the mantra I've used for years to describe the way women are viewed, especially in the ER: "Women are just attention-seeking, drug-seeking hypochondriacs who need to lose weight."

To me, it's sort of like when you think someone might be pregnant but you don't ask because you might end up embarrassing yourself... or worse, embarrassing the other person. Once, and this still bothers me to this day, I asked someone who clearly looked pregnant how far along they were. Not only was there no pregnancy, but the person I asked turned out to be a man.

@Lisa H. I must be missing something. Why you were embarrassed and why did the doctor's expression change? Did he think you were living at the shelter instead of volunteering there?

"Plateaus happen, bariatric surgery or no bariatric surgery. Bariatric patients see dramatic weight loss after surgery, with most of the progress coming in the first six months to a year after the procedure. Not all of that decrease is fat. Some of its muscle, and losing muscle, unfortunately, decreases the rate at which you burn energy, in turn slowing fat loss. And, as you lose weight, your body requires less energy to sustain itself. Your Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE) is going to be a lot different at 250 pounds than it was at 300 or 350. That means slower weight loss, too." 1. Re-commit to tracking your food 2. Change up your exercise routine. 3. Change up your diet. 4. Get enough sleep. https://www.obesitycoverage.com/4-ways-to-beat-a-weight-loss-stall-after-bariatric-surgery/ https://obesitynewstoday.com/reasons-for-not-losing-weight-after-bariatric-surgery/ https://mexicobariatriccenter.com/not-losing-weight-after-gastric-sleeve-surgery/

@George OG Am I assuming correctly that your (soon-to-be ex) mother-in-law is planning to testify against her daughter?

I'm that other person on the board who told you that lamotrigine is available sublingually. I'm glad that I was able to help.

I was serious about helping you get the vitamins you need. Let me know if your circumstances change. A lot of women can't cook either. I'm not one of those women, but I know several. Maybe the people on this forum can suggest some very healthy meals that don't require much cooking knowledge. It's worth a try, right? I hesitate to say this because I don't know how the breakup is affecting your son, but based on what you've shared so far, you're both (you and your son) better off. Do you expect to get full custody? All that money your soon-to-be ex spent on a video game can't look very good to a judge.

I haven't seen a dietician since my first required visit. I don't like hovering professionals who use one-size-fits-all menus. Not only am I a scratch cook, but the cuisine in my household uses ingredients unfamiliar to my dietitian. If I have a question about vitamins that might be something worth a visit, but I've read extensively and asked questions of others about my vitamins and other supplements, so I feel prepared. Honestly, she hasn't answered a single question easily available elsewhere and for free. My doctor told me yesterday during my 6weeks post-op visit that I'm doing great (38lbs lost). I haven't started an exercise program yet because of cramps, but that's the area I'd seek more help with. In other words, if I had to decide where to put my money, I'd invest it in a personal trainer and not in a dietitian. As for you being worth it, you are ALWAYS WORTH IT!

Why does your doctor assume that you will gain back all of your weight after a reversal? After all that you've been through and endured, I have a hard time believing that you'll ever think of food as "comfort" again. Don't let those thoughts dissuade you in any way. Get your health back and the rest will follow. I wish I could have been more helpful initially. I think I misread and misunderstood where you were in the process. Perhaps the information will be of use to someone. (Always looking for the positive).

Someone who had a reversal done in 2015: "I had a laparoscopic gastric bypass in 2005. I did my research and was satisfied with everything but one issue that always nagged at me. There were little long-term studies of over 7 years post surgery at that time. The surgery itself was a success....there were no complications and I went from 230 to about 140lbs. I also developed chronic amenia. Six years ago I began to get a very strange headache and had so much pressure on my optic nerves that my eye doctor sent me to a neurologist. My sight was failing at that point too. A contrasting MRI showed there was no tumor on the brain or optic nerves and that it was a "phantom tumor"-- cranial hypertension which is quite rare. The doctor performed a spinal tap to relieve the pressure, put me on medication and monitored me for a few years. It went away and I forgot about it for a few years. On Jan 21, 2015, I had chest/stomach pain that I knew I could no longer self-medicate. I was slowly getting sick for months prior to this but made every excuse...peri-menopausal....being run down...etc. I was admitted to the ER that night with a strangled colon and sepsis due to intestinal twisting. The surgeon opened me....my vitals became too unstable and he decided to resume the surgery in the morning if I lived through the night. He was able to complete the resection the next day. He removed 1/3 of my colon and 72 inches of intestines along with my appendix. I was in a medically induced coma for nearly a week. Moved to a rehab facility for physical and occupational therapy. I was finally able to go home on February 25, 2015. This is when I began to really fail instead of recover. I now had short bowel syndrome. Another extremely rare condition. Nutrients and fats were not being absorbed from the foods I ate, my hemoglobin reached a critical level twice (3 and 4.7) requiring approximately 14 bags of blood for transfusion. I was losing weight rapidly...size 12 at Christmas to a 4 currently. Most of my hair has fallen out and I'm as weak and frail as a colt. I researched Short Bowel Syndrome (SBS) and joined NORD, National Organization of Rare Disorders. I also found a closed SBS group on Facebook that connected me with 2 of the most amazing women I've ever met. Both living seven years with SBS. Living with SBS is a living hell. There isn't enough bowel to properly hold food in for absorption and I averaged about 26 explosive diarrheas daily. As soon as I took a bite or a sip of something the churning would start. It was loud and painful. Imagine the worst gas pain and diarrhea you've ever had and then imagine it 24/7. I only left the house for doctor appts. I had no energy and there was always the possibility of a public explosion. I was slowly dying.....wasting away. I had my gastric bypass reversal on August 7, 2015. I was lucky to have a good amount of viable intestines left that the surgeon used to repair the damaged portion. I was told that the surgery was a complete success. I no longer feel the weakness of being malnourished, my mind is clear which means the bacterial overgrowth is gone, food is staying in much longer and bowel movements are down to about 4-6 a day. I go back to the doctor on Wednesday, August 26 to get the staples out and for some labwork. Three interesting things that I recently learned: 1) The scar tissue from my gastric bypass caused the twisting 2) Cranial Hypertension and Short Bowel Syndrome, both very rare, are getting more notice because most of the patients with recent diagnoses have had a gastric bypass years ago....8-10 years is the average for "us patients". 3) Most people don't survive the kind of trauma that I suffered in January. There aren't many advocates speaking up about these very serious complications resulting from gastric bypass surgery." https://www.thinnertimesforum.com/topic/107174-my-gastric-bypass-emergency-resection-and-reversal/

"Bariatric Surgery Reversibility: What You Need to Know" https://obesitynewstoday.com/bariatric-surgery-reversibility/ "Gastric Bypass surgery is considered a permanent operation but can be reversed for medical problems only. The risks of a reversal are extremely high." -- Shawn Garber, M.D. Can Bariatric Surgery Be Reversed? Yes—but should it be? "Yes, but it's dangerous and impractical to do so. Neither procedure ends with the removal of any parts from the body, so they can both be undone, at least in theory. But going back to reoperate on tissue that's already been subjected to surgery increases the risks of bleeding and damage to the structures being repaired. (That's over and above the dangers associated with any surgery—like blood clots, infection, and injury to adjacent organs.) Scar tissue from previous work makes it harder for surgeons to see and access the normal tissue. Getting suture lines or staple lines to heal properly after a repeat operation is a challenge as well. There are some more specific reasons why it's not a good idea to reverse a bariatric surgery. A patient who undergoes a gastric bypass may never be able to regain a fully functional digestive tract. In the original operation, doctors divide the stomach and cordon off most of its volume with staples or a plastic band; they also reroute the stomach, connecting it to the middle of the small intestine so that fewer calories can be absorbed. To reverse all this later, surgeons must divide the stomach and intestine where they had been sewn together and then rejoin them in the original spot with a surgical stapling device. But the restored configuration won't be exactly the same as it was before the bypass. For one thing, it's impossible to mend several nerves that help with normal gastric function. As a result of these permanent changes, a patient who chooses to undo his bypass may experience post-op gastroesophageal reflux disease." http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/explainer/2010/02/can_bariatric_surgery_be_reversed.html Is Gastric Bypass Surgery Reversible? http://gastricbypass.surgery/gastric-bypass-surgery-reversible/

Use what you’ve been through as fuel, believe in yourself and be unstoppable!—Yvonne Pierre The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.—Moliere Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.—Francis of Assisi I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.—Jimmy Dean If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.—Milton Berle Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.—Milton Berle

Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive. —Josephine Hart Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor. —Truman Capote We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey. —Kenji Miyazawa The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. —Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it. —Helen Keller

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. —Robert L. Kennedy There is no such thing as failure. Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction.—Oprah Just because you fail once doesn’t mean you’re gonna fail at everything—Marilyn Monroe Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.—F. Scott Fitzgerald

We are all failures- at least the best of us are.—J.M. Barrie You’re not obligated to win. You’re obligated to keep trying. To the best you can do everyday.—Jason Mraz When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.—Ellen DeGeneras My grandmother once told me, ‘Don`t let failure go to your heart and don`t let success go to your head.’-Will Smith

Forget about the consequences of failure. Failure is only a temporary change in direction to set you straight for your next success.—Denis Waitley What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything—Vincent van Gogh Failure is a detour, not a dead-end street.—Zig Ziglar I think perfection is ugly. Somewhere in the things humans make, I want to see scars, failure, disorder, distortion.—Yohji Yamamoto