Malpraxis

Elective surgery? You're not having a facelift. You're having surgery to deal with a disease that will only get worse the longer you wait. Tell your surgeon that you're having problems at work and have some certificate as backup that you need the surgery now to avoid further complications (believe me, someone in your bariatric team will do that, it's more common of an issue than you think). Now with a medical note that you need it, you can plan it whenever the hell you wish. If they try to even move a finger against it, it's a HR/legal nightmare. And doctor patient confidentiality is a powerful tool. You don't even have to tell your boss it's a bariatric surgery (sadly, you already did, but no reason to panic, the following still stands). You only need a medical order that says that you need surgery. So... is your boss against something with medical experience ordered? Is your boss actively trying to sabotage your health? My, my... that looks like something that would be frowned upon... to say the least. Go for it, the law is on your side.

It's not only a sickness. It's an epidemic. And the sooner the world sees that, the sooner we'll have to stop having discussions about telling or not. In fact many governments are contemplating the fact that treating the root cause is actually cheaper in the long run than treating all the complications. We are the last generation where this will be a stigma.

I had no choice, as in my circle they found out even before I underwent surgery, but I'd told them anyway. I mean, I'm sick, and I'm doing something to fix that, it's not exactly double homicide. I realize that people in areas other than healthcare might be less understanding, but hey, (most) people aren't blind. They'll see the results and the change in your lifestyle. It's better to hear it from you than giving them the chance to gossip.

I really wish you the best of luck on that endeavor. My only advice would be to learn from your missteps. Write it down, what made you gain weight? What could you do better? Remember that it's a constant battle, and there's no thing as a charm. Are you overly anxious? There's treatment for that. Did you not do enough exercise? Try to stick to a routine or someone to force you to exercise against your will until it becomes a habit. Do you like food just way too much? Well, that's the hardest. But with therapy you can learn techniques to control those urges. Don't try the frontal assault. Consistent weight loss must be attacked on multiple fronts, because the damn thing just doesn't give up. In any case, you have a new shot at life. Don't let it be a blank. Prepare. Plan. Execute. Conquer. Good luck. Edit: Oh, and treat that hernia. Hopefully in the same procedure.

I'm more of a suit man. And that makes it a bigger problem. I also got gradually obese while being aware of it due to an injury, so I never got rid of any of my clothes, because I knew I'd need them again. My suits are arranged by weight. I know I'll make progress when I move further down the rack. In any case, are tailors where you live still a thing? Mine is old as hell, so it seems like it's a dying trade. My best advice would be to buy clothes that fit, but not that many, and have them fixed as you lose weight. Then treat yourself to a few staples as you go on. Accessorize well and the fact that they aren't exactly form fitting won't show as much. Otherwise you may end up buying something that fits you, but you don't really like. It's like buying clothes without trying them on.

Real food for thought (probably the only real food I'll be eating today). Despite not being a religious person, the serenity prayer came to mind: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference. " You cannot change your brain (completely [yet]), and that's a struggle, but you definitely (should) have the courage to change, and the wisdom to know your limits. Surgery just modifies your anatomy. As effective as it is, it's still a crutch. It buys you time to develop habits, to rewire years of mistreatment of yourself to the point where you got yourself sick. And the sooner people see obesity as a sickness, the sooner people will stop that body acceptance BS that some people are perpetuating. Four words to remember: YOU. ARE. KILLLING. YOURSELF. And any reasonably sane human, under the threat of imminent demise should instinctively jump on damage control mode. It's basic survival instinct. And after being aware of it, like any self preserving ecosystem should purge itself of the problem as efficiently as possible. So accept something that's sub par? Hell no. Would you drive with a flat tire? Would you jump of a plane with a faulty parachute? From the moment you take the decision to undergo surgery it's to solve the problem. And that's the only mindset that should prevail. Of course you can falter or even fail, and in that case is back to the drawing board until you get where you need to go. Falling is acceptable, standing up is indispensable. TL;DR: Hell no.

I wholeheartedly agree. I've been years on therapy, plenty of plans to do, pretty much charted every step of the way to an early retirement while feeling happy and fulfilled. And I am a happy person, albeit a bit lonely, but that's by choice - I decided to stay single because I cannot expect someone to carry my burden, both physical and psychological. There will be a time for love, as there was a time for war, and now there's a time for discomfort. And that goes the other way too, when I finally decide to be with someone, it will be as equals. I hold no ill will against anyone, I follow the philosophy that in enough time your enemies naturally reduce to zero. I've devoted myself to my health and my career, and when I do something I aim to be nothing less than the best. I'm in a cutthroat business, where everyone is competitive and tries to show off. I don't. I literally have a meditation room, with whiteboards filled with plans, outcomes, and contingencies (And nobody has seen it because I'd seriously look like a loon, but it works). The past? Is just a collection of experiences, distilled to know what to do and when to do it. I planned this way in advance. That girl? Oh, she tried to get back with me. More times than I can remember. Why? Because I thought her a fraction of my philosophy, and it worked so well for her that she thought I was dead weight (a lot of weight right now - literally). I just learned that emotions are a catalyst. It's what differentiates us from the other animals. So now that's my current catalyst. It's not a quest for revenge or forgiveness, just a means to an end. Once that goal has been achieved, I doubt I'll get any satisfaction from it, in fact, I won't even rub it in. I'll just concentrate on the next goal. And that's basically life. A long walk from one goalpost to the next. I really do thank you for your concern, and it will be analyzed and added to the mix of possible futures. I see you try to help people as well as yourself, you are a carer. The world needs more people like you. If anything, try to get a bit of happiness from the fact that someone acknowledges that fact. Or don't (It would be way more awesome if you did). God, this got way to philosophical for a thread about hobbies after getting sliced up. I better look at some pictures of puppies or something.

Aaaaaand I was already answering you! We are the future.

Well, it's because the world is on a primitive mindset. Morbid obesity is an epidemic, and surgery is the best known solution. A generation from now it will be like asking a diabetic why are their taking their pills/insulin. Only diabetes will go down because it's proven to be cheaper in the long run to have early metabolic surgery before reaching that stage.

Not in that stage yet, but among my colleagues one was on a similar situation. Whenever dining, when they asked "Why do you eat so little/slow?" he answered "Why do you eat so much/fast?". It worked, making them feel self conscious is a powerful tool. In my case, I'll be going with sarcasm. "I'm anorexic". "Already ate with my real friends". "Do you think us androids need food?".

Congrats! And joy to you. It seems like a bit longer than average stage of liquid, so I imagine you started feeling the strain. So far on liquids here, but I'm not really having it that bad. In fact I do forget to eat due to getting rid of that pesky ghrelin in the postop.

1-Go for it. 2-Feel great. 3-Exercise. 4-Roundhouse kick your coworkers in the mug. Generally speaking, people afraid of surgery are people who haven't had surgery. Bariatric surgery has vastly proven to be the best alternative both cost effective and healthwise. I'm willing to bet hard cash against anyone that can bring me a scientific paper from a reputable source that says otherwise. When you go back in a few months and look at this thread, looking and feeling great, you can print it and place it on a prominent place at your workplace.

Hi Sarah and welcome! Also new to this forum and wish I could've found it sooner, the crowd here is great. I'm fresh out of the Hospital from my RNY, and starting the way on self improvement. From what I read, you suffer from chronic reflux, and that's kind of a blessing in disguise, because it's one of the most common complications of both surgeries, so in the best case scenario, it will be cured after losing weight. Worst case, there are alternatives, so no reason to worry about that. Now, about your diabetes, it really depends on the onset. If it's early, I'd be leaning towards RNY, and will offer the added benefit of being a metabolic surgery, drastically improving your prognosis. If you've had it for a while, while I'd still lean towards RNY, there's no definite answer on the subject, so it's something best decided by your Endocrinologist. In any case, you're doing the right thing. Cheers!

Thank you, and on that point, I'm the literal embodiment of doing the right thing for the wrong reasons (I really want that to be my epitaph). Danger - Life Rant: I was indeed an Army Doctor, but I enlisted because my fiance left me (a catalog model to boot), felt depressed and ashamed and wanted someone to put a bullet in me. As a result I was extremely reckless and put myself in danger pretty much on a daily basis, and eventually that happened. Reconstructive surgery on my leg was the worst part, that and overeating as a coping mechanism led to gradually being morbidly obese. Now my leg is in fighting shape, so I decided to solve the other problem. My point being, I'm far from a hero. I'm sorry you had to deal with similar issues as mine during surgery, and I'm glad you had the fortitude to overcome them. You seem like a really strong person. I'm back from my walk, and instinctively did a pull up on my bedroom bar. It didn't go well (mental note: remove bar). Good news is, I'm already 3lbs down, so the fluid problem should solve itself shortly. Already reading the paper about classes I could go to to learn something (I saw a flyer offering tango lessons, sounds interesting eventually). Now I'm just anxious to get started on shedding fat. I see everyone's goals as weight. I see mine as giving a huge middle finger to my ex, retired and a decade older by now. Again, right thing for the wrong reasons, but so far it does the trick. I need to pass that roadblock to continue my therapy (forgiveness isn't my strong suit). In any case, thank you all for helping perhaps not the most morally (mentally?) sound person in the room. I'll be sure to help back in all the extent of my capacity. Oh, and if you read this far, congratulations. I owe you a protein shake or something.

Got an Audible membership and plan to listen to at least a book a day. And walking is great advice too, already redownloaded Pokemon Go. Right now I can only walk comfortably with a cane, but by the end of the month those puny trainers will fear me. Thanks!