I am really glad you have the courage to post this. I can tell you that you're not alone! I was the same way for almost 6 weeks post-op. Golly, I can practically identify with the anger and saddness. I even had some suicidal ideation because I could not see a path forward to a better life. A song from Paula Abdul, Forever Your Girl came on the radio and I just broke down sobbing in my car. This was the song that my ex-girlfriend (and the woman I thought I would marry) sang to me on karaoke night on a cruise. She was drunk, in love, and she looked directly at me as she sang the song. I remember tearing up at the love I felt. Well, it turned out she's not forever my girl.
In some ways I was/am mourning the old me and I don't have food to make me feel better. Is it possible that you are mourning the person that you were pre-surgery? The difficulty of the mental game cannot be underestimated. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I am here; having walked in your shoes.
I drink it over an hour and a half. I am the same way about it if it were to get melted and it never does. There is just something about a smoothie from there versus one I can make at home. It stays nice and cold, and thick. No Water rising to the top, no nasty Protein taste.
ttparks56 reacted to Mattymatt in Depression