capty

My husband had his surgery 2 weeks ago in Colorado. We had to pay out-of-pocket. Doctor and hospital was $12K. His pre-op cat scan OOP was $1,100 (insurance did pick up the rest).

So I can't find a forum for spouses. So I was hoping some of you can give me some tips. My husband's surgery is Monday. We live 4 hours from the hospital and he will have to stay 8-10 days in a hotel. I have to go back for 4 days because my job. After that I will be out of work until May/June (seasonal jobs). I don't want to be the a-hole who dangles food in front of him, however eating out until he is ready is unrealistic for me. How do I strike a balance? During this pre-op stage I've been good about eating at work (a restaurant) and then having yogurt or soup at home. When work stops next week, all my meals will be at home (except when we travel for the surgery.). I can't keep up soups and yogurts at home or weeks. (note- I'm an avid hiker and average 28 miles of walking a week, so I need calories.) I know some people are different, but how long was it before you were okay with food being around? What other things could your SO been more supportive about? I've read gas is an issue. Which is scary because between him and our English bulldog its already pretty gassy around here 😯. But seriously, any other side effects I should be aware of? I'm for the surgery, so that is not an issue. I just dont know anyone who has been through to ask.

Thank you for all your comments. DH's surgery was on Monday and he was discharged the same day. It ended up being pretty late when we finally left and we had to go to a pharmacy for some meds. Most places were closed/closing so we had to find a 24 hours place. It was going to take an hour and the hotel was 20 mins in the opposite direction. My husband is so sweet. He insisted we stop by a restaurant so I could eat while we waited. We went to the bar because there was no wait. Our bartender was awesome. DH told her he could only have 1 oz of water every 15 mins because he just had the surgery. 15 mins or so later she said "it's been 15 mins do you want another?". She rushed my order. Needless to say she got a big tip. We were signing the check as the pharmacy was texting the meds were ready. Prefect timing. The day after I ate breakfast and lunch outside of his presences. Not that he asked. It was more he was sleeping/napping and I really needed to get out. So I walked to the various places. I did eat dinner in front of him. I was going to eat at the restaurant, but he wanted me to get takeout. My husband is an executive chef. He talked about food the entire pre-op. All 2 hours. He had the nurses and doctors were in stitches. In the recovery room he started back up with food talk. In between naps in his room he was watching the food network. I don't know how he does it, but talking and/or watching food hasn't been an issue so far. I'm back home while he has to stay in Denver. I did make a batch of food in the slow cooker today to be eaten in the future so he wouldn't have to deal with the smell when he returns. Again, I appreciated the replies. Good luck to everyone. I will continue to lurk as I've learned so much from you all.

We have already talked to him about it. That is what he wants. My husband will be taking an online class (to become a certified master chef).. So that will keep him busy. I will return on day 7 (After the resturant) closes) to take him back. thx for all the replies.

I'm not sure. this doctor says if you are more than 2 hours away you need to stay in Denver for up to 10 days. Although we have an appt on thr 8th day. we live at altitude so made that is it?

I'm just a spouse of a WLS patient. My husband's surgery is on Monday. I just lurk on here to see what I can expect from this journey (which btw I've learned a lot). I'm horrified at your husband's attitude. I wish I could give you a big hug. I hope you are feeling better and have other support avenues.

Good day. I hope it's okay to post here. My husband is going to have gastric sleeve surgery on April 9th. Are there any forums for spouses? I'm on board with the surgery, but would like to talk to others who are spouses/partners and how they are dealing with the surgery. I'm thin (always have been) and very active. I look forward to my husband getting healthier and being able to do physical activities with me. I want to be as supportive as possible. That said, I have to admit I'm going to miss our weekly dinners out and such. I wondered how others dealt with the new "normal". Good luck to everyone and thank you in advance for any help you can provide. PS: I wanted to cry reading the posts about unsupportive spouses. I hope you find a good support system.