sideeye

But it doesn't directly deal with weight loss surgery; it's a lens through which to manage emotions around weight loss surgery. Try looking at it this way: if I'd started up a thread that said I was going to start a meditation practice every morning, and asked for people to chip in with their own ideas of what we should meditate on to encourage our WLS goals, that could very well be a good pursuit. One morning we could focus on mindful eating, another we could try to do deep body scans, any another we could visualize a non-scale victory. All good things, all useful for the community who finds it worthwhile! But is that directly dealing with weight loss surgery? Not really; it's an interesting exercise to run alongside WLS, but it's not about any of the practical mechanics like the physical impacts of surgery, insurance, leave from work, etc. I wouldn't expect a meditation thread on the main WLS board for that reason. Didn't start that way, developed that way. I wouldn't have jumped in here at all if it weren't for the emergence of us/them dynamics. Happy to live and let live, but scan the thread again and you'll see a progression that was picking up speed. It looks like a previous tiff got pulled into this thread; don't know the history so can't really address that. What I will say is that "witnessing" is a cultural litmus test that can garner very, very different reactions based on the participants in that interaction. What one person views as a low-key and essentially loving everyday communication can be received as a hugely inappropriate breach of etiquette by the other. And then things deteriorate from there. I'd agree that the thread does appear to be helpful for some and is worth continuing, but I still think it's off-topic for the core WLS board. It's religious in nature, not surgical in nature, and it's also exclusive.

The board shift is logical, the thread’s primarily about prayer rather than weight loss. Sure, the content of those prayers is around WLS concerns, but the focal point is faith. And then the content took a hard turn into proselytizing. It didn’t make a ton of sense to have a “prayers, keep out” post at the top of a heavily-trafficked board otherwise focused directly on WLS. I’d wager that most of the people looking to interact with this post did, and will follow it to its new home.

I have one word for you: LASERS! Better than electrolysis, way more effective! I did it about 8 years ago and within 4 treatments everything was GONE. I go back about once a year to do a touch-up cycle, and it is absolutely worth it. I was so thrilled that I also lasered my legs; my leg hair was so thick and coarse that even when I shaved it, you could see the stubble through the top layers of skin like ground pepper sprinkled on my shins, but I haven't even touched up on it in years and I have maybe four hairs that come in very thin. I'm in the same maybe-PCOS boat as you are, with all the symptoms except the actual damn cysts. When I finally snapped and started the lasers it was because I wasn't just irritated by shaving, I was getting a ridiculous number of ingrown hairs no matter what I did. And though I really hate to say it: I think my facial hair's come back a little stronger than it used to post-op. But maybe that's just my body temporarily freaking out, I don't know! And I'm going to zap it back into oblivion soon. One caveat: laser works best on dark hair and light skin. As a Translucent-American with very dark hair, this made me pretty much the ideal candidate; I can't say if Irish redheads or dark-haired Kenyans would have the same luck. For them, electrolysis might be the better bet. I know some groups don't mention that up front, so buyer beware.

Heads up: after surgery the way the protein shakes taste may change for you. So don't make a massive investment in a particular brand until you're post-op. I did a whole taste-test thing pre-op, ranked the drinks according to my pre-op preferences and then post-op planned to go through the list until I hit one that worked. Luckily my #1 choice (Orgain chocolate) still tasted good; the others actually got much much sweeter post-op and I can't stand them at all now.

Mine really seemed to be between m4 and m5. I did chop it all short though, so maybe it's still tailing off.

You find out a lot of this stuff through trial and error, but: you have to be paying attention to benefit from those messages. If you're focused on the part of your brain that's craving and looking for a "fix", all you're doing is indulging an emotional trigger and that's going to be a problem in the long run. If you're focused on how your body reacts to what you're eating and making rational yes/no longterm decisions based on those reactions, then you're in better shape. You're a science experiment now, so roll with it. I'm 5 months out so hardly an old-timer, but this is what I've figured out about my specific situation: I can't eat any part of a donut anymore without feeling positively revolting. In fact, anything bready in the AM is my kryptonite, especially sweet and bready - this has resulted in me starting off many days with a protein shake (good) or coffee (not so good) or maybe a boiled egg (requires prep, working on it). I cannot order fries anymore without having to throw 98% of them out, so now I steal off of other people's plates, but even then I know if I eat 4 fries I'm not going to be able to enjoy anything on MY plate because I'll feel full. I can't eat cereal anymore without feeling gross, at any time of day. I can eat sushi, but have to be really premeditated with something like kimbap or bibimbap (no fluids well beforehand, very light other meals during the day). I can't have more than one coffee per day without feeling weird. Small amounts of nuts is fine, but goodbye to any quantity of Trader Joe's trail mix. Varying levels of success with fruit: I can eat it, but more than a couple bites and I don't feel fantastic for the next half hour. You CAN eat carbs or fried foods as soon as you're cleared for solid foods, but you may regret the physical sensations immediately afterwards. The truly dangerous part of that is allowing your emotional centers ("I want to go to the cafe and eat a croissant in the sun while drinking tea and reading a book") to override your physical reactions ("...but I won't because even half of a croissant makes me feel queasy") and then basically training your body to push through the physical warnings through repeated exposure. Get used to throwing perfectly good food in the trash. Embrace it. Yes, there's 85% of the bag of trail mix left, and yes you paid good money for it, but WHY would you keep it around to "try one more time" if you just had some and then had to lie on the couch feeling bloated for 20 minutes? Throw it away and cement that in your mind: don't buy trail mix because it gets thrown away. I just went on a family vacation and threw at least half a cup of my favorite ice cream down the drain after over serving myself and recognizing my body hit a limit (not dumping, just my stomach saying "you're done now") on spoonful #6. This is a good time to recognize counterproductive behaviors and tackle them. If that means giving up servings of croissants, pad thai, banana milkshakes and corn flakes, so be it.

I'm glad (seriously!) you're all finding a supportive community here through a shared spiritual belief, but surely you understand that the phrase above is exactly the sort of prim brimstone-flinging that makes us atheists find proselytizing ... Tiresome. And somewhat hard to align with the idea that kicked off this thread, which is that you're the ones being persecuted. Team Atheism will take care of our own hereafters, thanks. No need to write weirdly gleeful religious fan fiction about some sort of supernatural comeuppance, and we will courteously resist doing the empirical science-based version right back at you. Respectful observance of boundaries, etc. Right?

I've been out of town for three months, so for a lot of people in my town it looks like these changes have happened all at once. Two of the nail salon workers spent 5 minutes gossiping with each other about how my face had thinned out, how my cheekbones are more prominent, and how my butt and thighs are much smaller (though they thought I wasn't using enough sunblock because I've freckled this summer). They also decided that it wasn't plastic surgery and that I must be eating practically nothing. This all happened right in front of me while I'm getting a pedicure. They have entirely forgotten that I understand Korean.

I signed up for Stitch Fix and not only are all the clothes cute, they all fit. I have moved from the "donate because they're too big" phase and into the "donate because they don't match the style I'm going for" phase, and constantly have a to-donate bag on the go. Through a bizarre coincidence where my most noticeable face-related weight loss happened the same week I chopped off all my hair, people keep marveling at how "this new haircut is amazing, it makes you look totally different!" It's like they know SOMETHING changed, but they can't quite put their finger on it... One of my male coworkers, who is an extremely vain gym buff and has been known to do squats while on conference calls, keeps creeping up behind me and hissing "seriously, what did you DO?" I keep telling him I got a haircut.

Started 4 months after surgery, only noticeable to me and hairdresser, continued for around a month. Shedding like crazy, in and out of shower. Was on around 800 cals per day, no pre-op diet, so there goes the “it’s because of starvation” theory. Took biotin and prenatal multivitamins, can’t say it had much impact either way. Hit my protein goals. Cut off around a foot of hair last week just to change things up and have no complaints about it. You’ll likely have hair loss, and I know mine was pretty minimal (relatively thick hair to start) but even when it was coming out in hunks I didn’t regret surgery. If you’re attached to a particular hairstyle then it might be harder to shake the feeling that your thinning is noticeable, because you’ll be able to see the before-and-after difference. I’d actually suggest everyone prep for a fun new shorter haircut because the different style prevents you from playing “spot the difference” when staring in the mirror. It’s ALL different at that point.

I can't get over how little heat affects me now. I'd heard a lot about "I'm always cold post-surgery!" and that hasn't really happened, but I have certainly noticed that I am WAY more comfortable in heat than I ever was before. Around 65 degrees used to be my sweet spot, and above 75 filled me with dread. I'd be two steps out of the office door and sweat would start soaking my scalp, no exertion needed. But now? Now I can leave the client site still wearing a fleece and not bother unzipping it until I'm in the car. The car itself has been baking in the sun all day and is likely over 100 degrees inside, and I don't have to leave it to air out, I can just start driving. I'm bone-dry the whole time and can shrug off the heat no problem. I still don't LIKE heat, but it was actually making my life significantly more horrible pre-surgery. The fact that it's a nonissue now is crazy to me. This is how other people lived this whole time!?

I love that you're my Ghost of Hair Future - same, hair loss abruptly slowed over the past few days. Definitely still needed to cut it (partly because it was just looking ratty), but the hunks of hair have stopped coming out in the shower and my pillowcase is no longer looking like I have a yeti paramour.

I don't post photos of myself online, but for reference, the hair pretty much looks like this, except imagine the face with my avatar's expression and ear piercings. And the hairdresser told me that the thinning wasn't actually bad at all, she didn't end up with clumps of hair in her hands during the shampoo, though we agreed to part my hair on the left since my right temple is much thinner than the left (why?!). Don't fear the long bob!

Done. Also done: a full foot of hair. (Broom included for scale)

Scheduled the chop for Tuesday - probably about 6 inches off. I cannot believe how much hair I'm still pulling out, it's nuts, and this is probably a month into the official hair loss. The diameter of my ponytail is maybe a nickel (used to be a silver dollar). At this point I'm looking forward to cutting it all off, purely to get a little lift at the roots again.

I told them if the test came back positive, they’d be witnessing the start of a new religion. They still made me take it.

I’m experiencing a weird transition cheat: I keep buying things that are bad for me, then taking one bite and realizing I don’t like it, and crushing it and throwing it away. I have an entire donut in the car trash right now because of just this process The impulse to buy is still very strong. The impulse to eat is weirdly mostly gone. It’s bizarre because I would NEVER have just forgotten I had sweets before, but now I routinely find something I purchased and abandoned days earlier. I am wasting a lot of money on direct-to-trash sweet foods. I’ve also come to realize that I am just not a person who can do solid food in the morning and I am going to stop pushing myself to “start the day off right”. Protein shake and maybe a string cheese and I’m done until lunch.

I hear you, but I also find newborns EXTREMELY UN-FUN. One of my friends was just disastrously sick seven months of her pregnancy. Another one had to go on bed rest starting month 5. We work in an industry where that stuff can happen and you can actually keep your job, but... shudder. Total buzzkill for me, no matter how in-the-moment I am.

Most hospitals do a urine test when they admit you to pick up exactly this. I'll defer to the medical professionals on this board for verification, but every single time I've gone to the hospital for a procedure they've made me pee in a cup. It's always been for a pregnancy test. If it comes back positive they won't operate. Pretty straightforward and other than telling them you had unprotected sex, you don't really need to do anything here. (...and here of course is the unsolicited advice of DAMN, if you're only on a one-month birth control break which I assume means you don't want to be pregnant, why play Russian roulette like that? Condom! Condom condom condom! Spermicide! Condom! Diaphragm! Condom! Ack!)

I'm eating a croissant RIGHT NOW.

During my barium swallow I found out that I have moderate scoliosis, so... if your doc has the scan on hand, go ahead and ask them if that's something you should check out (they won't diagnose you, but can at least tell you if it's something you should see a doc about).

I think I had them at around 4 weeks, they made me really gassy, didn't start up again until 2.5 months and now I probably have three a week?

I live on my own, and I had to go to Target to buy something very specific for a theme party. I was STUNNED at what I could buy there - all of the food would fall firmly on the "not great for you" side of the scale, but were also in larger containers than my local store and cheaper. I ended up buying random sweet crap I never would have bought otherwise, and then when I got home I started eating much more of them than I usually would, and finally just had to pull out a garbage bag and throw it all away to stop me from eating it all. I'd been suckered by the cost-per-unit siren song and ended up wasting money. I live in a city so have more food flexibility (few big box stores, lots of smaller specialists and grocers) and have come round to the belief that veering away from long-term-storage food and bulk food is just how I have to go with all this. I end up shopping every other day and getting appetizer takeaways, which I used to think was too expensive, but I'm now pretty damn convinced it's making me stay in my parameters food-wise and spend less. For instance, today I bought a slice of quiche for lunch. Could I perhaps have bought an entire frozen quiche for the same amount of money? Yes! Would I have eaten it all before it went off? Possibly! Would I have eaten it all in one or two sittings and blown through my caloric guidelines for the day? Probably, if I was concerned about not wasting money/food. Just having that bulk food in the house is unbelievably tempting, I don't know how those of you with kids do it.

I eat Diana's Bananas (dark chocolate variety) about every other day and you can pry them out of my cold dead hands, thank you very much. Once every few weeks I'll make myself a "chocolate shake" out of a frozen banana, hot chocolate powder and milk, which I never finish because the damn blender whips a ton of air into it so I fill up fast. I also buy those little Hoodsie cups of ice cream, because Halo Top and its evil cohort are indigestible for my stomach so I have to indulge in the real stuff in small quantities. I have been developing a Wendy's problem, for psychological reasons involving a different commute and old behavior patterns. Getting a chicken sandwich about once a week, which is DELICIOUS for three bites and then I throw it out, which is basically the same as throwing a fistful of dollar bills into the trash. Ridiculous. I also was hitting up the Dunkin Donuts for a morning coffee until I realized I'd WAY underestimated the amount of calories in the drink I was ordering, and now I'm saving that for once a week (and diverting my driving route). Oh god, and the new place I'm working has Rice Krispie Treats EVERYWHERE, and when everyone grabs a snack I grab that, and it's gotten to the point that people BRING IT TO ME when they get coffee, and a few days ago I realized I had about five of them hoarded in my apartment just because I'd thrown them in my bag at work. And then of course I ate them, because hey, rice, right? My dietician/surgeon plan isn't particular strict, focusing on balance more than ruled-out foods, so I've mostly been trying to keep an even balance and small quantities. Did this stop me from buying a wedge of carrot cake last week and eating it over three days? No, no it did not.

WHOA. Yeah, okay, I can definitely see why that would be worth extensive research. Yikes.