Creekimp13

You're right, summerset....getting folks to think about weight loss and disordered eating in any other way than...extreme dieting...is like hitting your head against a wall until it's bloody. I'm not sure I care to do it anymore. The windmill wins. And Sillykitty made a great point...many people FEEL any suggestion of doing it any other way...is criticism of what they've been doing. It isn't, but I know it's experienced that way. There is a defensiveness that rivals politics and religion...when we talk about diets and weight loss. Everyone is very fixed on what they believe...including me, I suppose. I think this might be a major reason why we don't see more activity on the veteran's forum...there's a volitility that gets so negative. And ya know? I like ya'll. I don't want to feel negative about anyone or anything here. At some point, it's unhelpful to share your two cents, even when you try to do it carefully. And at some point, maybe it's best to realize that. Peace and best wishes to all.

This is why I took such care to start with....follow your doctor, not crazy people on the internet....and ended with....Totally ok if you think I'm nuts/wrong/whatever. Take what you like and leave the rest. And also why I posted in "rant". Sillykitty, you make an excellent point. And I think at the end of the day, maybe I've just outgrown this board and my commentary is doing more harm than good. People DO need to do their own process.

The first month has the infamous 3 week stall averaged in....and it can ruin your average. Next month will be better. Don't panic. Stick to your program.

Sounds extremely normal to me. Would help if we knew your weight stats.

I ate a lot after surgery. The restriction was there and I could only do a little at a time, but I was non-stop HUNGRY, so I ate non-stop. At around week 3-4 weeks...when I was encouraged to eat 1200 calories a day, I started feeling more content and like I was on a sustainable diet. I still ate 6 times every day....and often still do. You will be able to eat more of mushy "slider" foods than foods with more substance. Eating is not the devil. Eating a sane number of calories during loss phase is not a bad thing. Feeling well enough and having the energy to do the exercise that boosts your metabolism...is a good thing. You don't need to be a starving zombie to lose weight. You definately need to keep track and make good food choices, but the extremely low calorie diets are both unwise and can set you up for rebound regain. Eat sensibly. Good choices. Stay within calorie limits. Boost your metabolism with 15 minutes of cardio every day. (doesn't have to be anything fancy, some very heavy folks reach cardio just by taking a walk) Stay active, stay nourished. You will lose weight.

1. Figuring out what to do with the pissed off/sad feelings when food wasn't an option to self soothe with. 2. Grieving no longer liking foods I've used as a comfort crutch for a lifetime. 3. Being suprised that this is a lifelong challenge, a lifelong calorie count, a lifelong need to be mindful, a lifelong fight. You don't "overcome" this. You learn more strategies to deal with disordered eating....every day....for the rest of your life. You learn more about how you ended up fat. You learn more about yourself. Most newbies think of weighloss surgery in terms of.... First hurdle....getting surgery Second hurdle..surviving post surgical diet Third hurdle..doing extreme things to get down to goal weight as soon as possible. (terrible idea) and at Goal....the fantasy ends. The typical Newbie thinks goal weight is the yellow brick road happy ending with a rainbow over it. Goal Weight is arriving at the destination you will never depart from. It is THE END, the reward, Bliss, Victory, blah blah blah... The problem with arriving at goal....is that you wake up the next day....and you're still you. LOL. Look past goal. Goal isn't the end. You don't get fixed just because you reach goal. Your brain and eating aren't less disordered. You have to work through all sorts of weird behavior and fix the parts of you that need attention...the parts that drove you to morbid obesity. That's the real challenge....living permanently with new eating habits, new physicality, and finding new outlets for toxic feelings that don't end up being self sabotaging. The work is never done. I won't say it doesn't eventually get easier. But it's never done. I will be working on this big life change....for the rest of my life. One of the bigger challenges many people face is thinking the surgery magically fixes you (it doesn't), thinking that the surgery does the work (it doesn't, but you do), and thinking that you're cured somehow at goal. You are just getting started.

My doctor wanted 10% weight loss through medically supervised diet before he'd approve you. For me that was 27 pounds. My insurance wanted 5 months of medically supervised weight loss....so that's what I did, and lost 40 pounds by cutting back calories, learning about better nutrition, making better choices. After surgery, my doctor wanted us eating 1200 calories a day by the 3-4th week. We avoid refined carbs, but eat LOTS of whole carbs....potatoes, whole grains, etc. (no refined sugar or white flour products) We ate 1200 calories a day like that until goal....then gradually upped calories to maintenance. I maintain well at 1600 calories a day. I eat pretty much everything, but am careful with refined foods.

What works for me, is this.......if I go up five pounds, I need to see the bariatric therapist. It's the deal I've made with myself, and it works. I very very seldom go up five pounds, but each time I do... I schedule an appointment, have a good talk about the triggers I'm dealing with....and get things straightened out before it gets worse. I cannot say enough positive things about using the bariatric therapist as another good tool. Best wishes to all.

My suggestion is always...go slow and sustainable. Tweek your diet with small changes that last and don't try to sprint. Quick weight loss schemes and super restriction can cause your metabolism to shut down and can lead to regain. Slow and steady wins the race.

At 5'5" and 240...with good luck, your skin will snap back. At age 18 your chances are terrific (but not guaranteed.) I think about the tiny little 20 year olds I know with huge pregnancies whose skin reduces and looks terrific in months. I had my surgery done at 46, and was stunned at how well things reduced back into place. I have a few trouble areas, but I don't mind how I look naked at all. I was open to skin surgery, but don't feel I need it. At 18, I think you're gonna look amazing:) Best wishes.

They'll give you a lists of things you'll need to do before they'll approve and schedule you. Each doctor is different, but most will want a history of weight loss effort, a medically supervised diet with visits to dietician and some weight loss, clearance from a bariatric therapist, medical tests...some want support group attendence, fitness classes, etc. Just very much depends on your surgeon's group policies. They will likely discuss benefits and drawbacks of each different surgery. They'll measure you and weigh you and give you a list of things to schedule.

Yes. Seeing the bariatric therapist helped. Best wishes.

Do you have a required psych evaluation? Many people do. I don't know what the requirements might be with someone 5 years into substance recovery....but I know that crossover addictions are a huge concern with bariatric surgery. If you have not talked about this issue with your doc, it would be a really good idea to broach the topic. Also to ask if your healing stomach will be able to handle methadone, or if your blood serum concentration would have to be carefully monitored to adjust dose....I suspect it would be. Best wishes.

Good questions for a bariatric surgeon. Have you had surgery yet, or are you researching it?

Raisin bread is simple carbs. Not a great choice. I wish it were, I love it, but it's gone from my diet because it's essentially a donut...white bread with raisins in it...super processed white flour, dried fruit is concentrated sugar, and almost no fiber to slow the sugar bomb down. Sugar bombs cause insulin rebound that makes you even hungrier...and you're more likely to snack. Be careful of too much fruit in smoothies, too. Lots of sugar and calories. Not saying not to eat fruit, just be very mindful of your sugar items and balance them with FIBER...it'll help. Track every calorie. When we pay attention to every single thing we graze on...it adds up crazy fast.

Just start where you are and keep increasing the goal a little at a time. Challenge yourself, but listen to your body. Good luck on reaching your 5K:) Might happen this year, might happen next year, but keep at it! At 60...pay attention to your aches and pains. Don't pop a knee and end up needing a surgery by being overly ambitious...nothing screws up your training like months of injury disability. Go slow, but keep gently pushing:)

I've seen some folks in their 20's have remarkable skin reshaping (skin snaps back and doesn't sag). Nice young elastic skin helps a lot.

It gets better, but I still miss being able to drink a whole glass of water at one time. Three years out, I can take a couple of glups, but that's it.

I eat dark chocolate every single day. One square. About 55 calories worth. It has a gram of protien, a gram of fiber, and I enjoy it:) I can't mindlessly eat anything sugary or I will get into trouble with too many calories and will get nauseated past 200 refined sugar calories. But that little square of chocolate is a delight...and I have had no issues eating it daily with mindful intent....keeping it as part of my balanced daily diet.

I'd get the snow crab legs. Crab is soft, delicious, not too much volume. High quality protien.

Walking. Started walking 6 months before surgery. Worked up from about 5000 steps a day to 10,000+ steps a day...and got them the day of my surgery wandering the unit halls after my surgery:) Building up endurance walking...and continuing to walk every day....has been incredibly helpful. Strong metabolism, I can eat more calories, great energy and endurance. Exercise is one of the most effective and least prescibed antidepressants. Helps your bone density, boosts your metabolism, improves heart health. You can walk about anywhere. Invest in a Fitbit or other tracker and get active:)

I was STARVING hungry until the 3-4th week post surgery when I started eating 1200 calories a day.

I'm 49...at goal:) Going through perimenopause now.

Man, if I had a dollar for every critic who said this to me on these boards. It's a past time of a certain type of dieter....to send me hate mail and try to shame me for being outspoken. "You're still overweight! You shouldn't be telling people what to do! How dare you not feel ashamed at that weight!" Shakin my head over here. If I wanted to be 140, I could be. Have been. Looked god-awful and felt like I was starving all the time. If I wanted to be 160, I could be. Have been. I wasn't particularly hungry, got a reasonable number of calories, but thought I looked older. I like a little more round to my angles. I like less sag, fewer wrinkles. Not real interested in cosmetic surgery. Picked the best option for me. I like eating 1600 calories a day. I like having space in my diet for a couple pieces of fruit because I think phytonutrients are beneficial and important. I like how i feel eating a high fiber diet. I like room to be a vegetarian some days. I like flexability. It's how I can face this as a lifelong change. It's how I can make peace with food forever....cause I know this plan is WORKABLE in pretty much all situations. I can eat on my plan during a holiday, a funeral, a birthday party....during a power outage, while recovering from an injury, during extreme emotional stress, on the road, and while dealing with my inlaws. LOL. I typically weigh 165-170 pounds. I LOVE this weight. It is NOT "the best I could do because I couldn't get to a "healthy weight" ", it is an intentionally chosen set point. It's a choice. This is, I am 100% certain...the MOST healthy weight I can choose for myself. That whole...Arnold Schwarzenegger's BMI was technically Obese when he won Mr. Universe figures in. BMI is flawed. It doesn't differentiate between light muscle frames and heavy muscle frames, bigger bones, smaller bones. Different ethnicities. Different body styles. My feet, depending on the manufacturer are size 10 or 11. My shoulders are more broad than most men's my height. My butt, thighs and calves are overdeveloped because I rode huntseat and jumped horses for decades, even when I was quite heavy. My husband says they have a kinda superhero quality now. LOLOLOLOL So here's the thing....If you feel inclined to send me a snarky note about how I shouldn't say anything....because I'm not American Media model skinny, you might have a problem. As it happens, I have a good friend who models. He's 5' 10", weighs 157 pounds soaking wet, and they STILL wanted him to use coke for a week and fast...to look more sickly skinny for his last national ad campaign. Our impression of body image in the media is grossly distorted and unhealthy. And a lot of folks here....get a grossly distorted and unhealthy obsession with their eating habits, their BMI, the number on the scale, and how it defines them. Please, please, please remember....health. Physical health, strength, endurance, good labs, fewer medications. Emotional health...loving yourself, enjoying your life, feeling challenged and happy. Mental health...finding balance you can live with for a lifetime. Love your strong healthy body. Love your good food choices that provide good nutrition to nurture that body. Love the flexability to make it work though the tough spots. Avoid the fixations, the extremes, the inflexable rules, the disordered eating (and disordered not-eating) You can trust yourself to get to where you need to be....without punishment. Love yourself. Love yourself. Love yourself.

Every so often I feel torn on these forums about my role and what I should say. On the one hand, I'm a veteran now....and have had success with this whole undertaking that I feel pretty proud of. There are a lot of struggles and things that I can comment about with some hard earned observations and experiences. I can be all.....mentory...and have good mentor-ish things to say to newbies. Sometimes I feel a responsibility to *provide a good example* and only say things that are in harmony with the bariatric sages...and play the proper acolyte to the Bariatric Authority. But here's the part where I feel torn. I also want to tell the truth. I want to be the kind of poster I really enjoyed reading when I was first looking into this crazy ride. I want to be unvanished, raw and HONEST. Because I value that in people. I value that risk. I value those stories....because sometimes people really need those stories. Even if they're terrible advice and provide a terrible example! Sometimes just knowing someone else....occasionally has a horrible day and eats the entire pack of four Yasso bars....helps you to live your life and forgive yourself. I want to say: Yes, I drink diet soda. I know it's probably unwise and I also know there's hype about it that's untrue....AND....I know a lot of you drink it, too. And some of you drink real soda.....and will probably rot in hell for it. LOLOLOL Ya'll won't admit it....but I've seen ya. I've peeked in those windows and I know you do all sorts of awful stuff. You eat peanut M&Ms and drink soda and beer and buy the occasional McDonald's kid's meal and can of Pringles. At Christmas, you cheat. You eat stuff you shouldn't. You ate Halloween candy. Ok, it was just a couple of pieces...but it made you happy. We're not perfect. We screw up. We make questionable choices. Sometimes regularly. We STILL have unhealthy food moments. We're works in progress. Can we talk about it as adults...knowing it's a crap example...but also knowing that it's human? We still do weird assed extreme things in realtion to food. How many calories in two almonds and one dried cherry? I HAVE TO WRITE IT DOWN. How many grams of protien in one pint of donated blood? How many calories do I lose when I menstruate? I had a cold and blew my nose ten times and the internet says snot is made of protien...do I have to up my protien? I once heard a lady on one of these boards say....she had her Flinstone chewable multi vitamin....for dessert after her meal. And it was delicious. 😳 Is it wrong to admit I wanted to slap her? I'll admit it...I ate a S'more about two weeks after I had surgery. I remember it as the most exquisite thing I've ever eaten...and I nibbled that one little square of heaven all night in front of the fireplace with the Christmas lights on. Licked it, actually. Down to a stump. LOL. And Yes, ..a part of me is still screaming at myself.....You had a freaking S'more right after your surgery???? What the actual H*ll???!!! What were you thinking? (I lived...crap, I even lost weight to goal...but I commited this food crime. Guilty.) Sometimes I think we lose our humanity in this environment....because as some folks have noticed, there's a competative thing. Some weird ick factor of needing the best score...the tiniest dinner...the least daily calories. "I'm going to get down to my original weight of 9 pounds 3 ounces if it kills me. Could someone please eat the other half of my lentil? It's too much for me." And then I think....crap, maybe these folks really ARE as together as they seem and I'm just nutty and disordered and still fighting through this mess everyday three years out...isn't normal... But then I look at the number of folks who wash out...and think......nope. MOST of us are struggling and screw up. MOST of us continue to screw up and figure it out. Would be fun to do the research to put an actual number on it.... But I'd bet at least 90% of us...have secrets they would never disclose in a forum like this about one screw up or another. I think we need a Confession thread. Where correction is not allowed. Where worry and concern (and abject horror) are forbidden to be expressed. Where we can just let that other lost soul know....yep, I licked a S'more, too....you're not alone. All sins can be forgiven. Tomorrow is always a new day.