Creekimp13

Exercise is one of the least prescibed and most effective treatments for depression and anxiety.

I think there's a certain amount of sadness in realizing that certain foods are never gonna be the same. We made food so freaking IMPORTANT in our lives that a change in the relationship can feel like something you're grieving. Does that make sense? It's a little like a divorce, maybe. You know it's for the best, you know you need to do something different to be healthier...but you do remember the good times, and can get sad and nostalgic. Also, it's an eye opener to confront your feelings without being able to medicate them with food. Losing a coping mechanism can be hard. Gotta find a new one that is healthier. But yeah....it's easy to miss food's comfort and nostalgia...and that can feel sad and weird.

Tons of things. I used to LOVE Egg McMuffins....I think they're kinda Meh, now. Pasta...loved it....can't tolerate much of it now. Pizza...same. I used to LOVE chili cheese dogs.....they taste like greese and salt now...just nasty. I have NOT lost my love of sugar. But I can't eat more than 200 calories of a significantly sugary food without feeling gross....I want to drink a big glass of water and lie down. I used to HATE sweet potatoes....they're one of my favorite things now. Never liked beans....I crave black beans now. Particularly, black beans with salt and pepper poured over a baked potato with onions. Who knew? Used to love dairy.....I'd rather use almond milk and olive oil butter now. I crave crunchy veggies. Seriously. Not just saying that. I genuinely love the flavors...and never used to. Salad for dinner sounds MUCH better to me than a casorole or anything with rich sauce...bleh. Used to love meatloaf. Nope. Salty and greasy...no yum factor. Tofu....used to feel Meh about it....now, I crave it. Same with nuts. Never liked them....now, they're a daily thing. Used to LOVE eggs and could eat three several times a week.....can eat one poached now, once in a while...but rarely. Never fried anymore...bleh. (though, if my husband has one, I might dip a toast corner in his yolk) Used to DESPISE oatmeal and cream of wheat.......I eat them nearly everyday now. Used to love bread....like...half a loaf of fresh bread. I still like fresh bread, but I have one piece and I'm done. Love berries. And bananas. And avacado on sourdough. Used to love heavier meats....pork, steak, sausage. Am totally grossed out by all sausage now, and eat a very small amount of chops or steak. Used to HATE fish. Now I love fish. Paricularly crab, scallops and shrimp. I still love candy, Pringles, donuts, cake, ice cream.....but I can stop at 200 calories worth and not have to fight any urge for more. 200 calories of those things feels like enough and it is a LOT easier to stop. (but be careful, because in about two hours, 200 more calories might sound really good)

My no-no items were this in a nutshell.....having no awareness of how many calories I was eating. Can you get fat on "healthy" foods. Yep, you can. If you eat more calories than you're burning, it doesn't matter if you eat Cadbury Eggs, Lean Cuisine, French Fries, green beans or Rice Cakes. I hate logging my food with a purple passion....but it works. It is one of the MOST important things you need to do to unlearn bad habits and the lies we tell ourselves about food. A few months after surgery, you will likely be able to eat about anything. And you can. You can even eat things without gaining weight IF you watch your calories and make sure you're prioritizing getting enough protien. Sounds awful doesn't it? You go through this whole surgery and you STILL have to count calories? Yep. You do. Every day. Forever. Because if you don't....you can gain it back, and people do.

Raves are more fun and positive than rants. Rave away! I rant too much. LOL. Raves are terrific.

All excellent points, Summerset. She claims to have had four kids, and her results are just amazing. Not saying everyone could do this...(and God knows I have issues with places my body didn't reshape exactly how I'd like it and i don't know that a whole lot could be done outside of plastics).....but, I've gotta admit, it makes me curious to try it! Her skin reducing back into place is shocking to me.

I am three years post surgery....and married for 27 years. You will be happy to know that nothing has changed in our relationship:) That said, I know it does for many, many people. They don't call it "divorce surgery" for nothing. So, I get where you're coming from....the statistics are a little scary! Ultimately, what I'm reading in your post, is that you'd like to know with certainty that this change isn't going to cause any changes in your relationship. And here's the honest answer: there is no way to know. Chances are excellent, in my opinion, that it's going to work out great. But yes, of course, people can and do change over time and change with personal changes/growth/age. Here's my question for you: What do you think your options are? Would you stop supporting her decision? Would you change your behavior in any way....if you knew the risk to your relationship was real? I think you're trying to have control and certainty....and that just isn't realistic. She's doing something to improve her health. She's doing something to improve her lifespan. She's doing something to improve her quality of life. Would you ever, under any circumstances, want to stand in the way of that? If your answer is...."I might not support her if there is a chance I could lose her"....you need to make an appointment with the therapist pronto. Marriage is a daily choice. There is no reason to believe she would choose any other way than she has the past 14 years. Reign in the insecurity and get ready to be her rock. She will need you.

It's a hard period of adjustment for sure! But don't forget that you committed to this tough part. You need to follow through, follow instructions and stay safe. If you bust a stomach incision it can be life threatening and will result in a brutally long hospitalization and a much LONGER liquid diet! If you totally lose your mind and eat something....never skip ahead more than one stage. Maybe your doctor can clear you for something like blended cream soup or thin hot cereal? It can't hurt to let your provider know what a tough time you're having and see if they can help. Was a tough stretch for me, too. Hang in there! Best wishes!

Hoping there are no big delays. Better to be safe if you have to wait, but I'm gonna cross my fingers and toes you get your surgery on schedule. Best Wishes!

Can't hurt to look into some abdominal exercizes. They might not work, but you never know until you try, and why not? I know there's one lady on here who is a weight lifter who has had INCREDIBLE results without plastics, by sculpting her body with weight lifting. I, too, am a rectangle. LOL. If you find something that works, be sure to share!

I'm a sleever and most of us don't really dump, but I do notice if I eat more than 200 calories of a sugary treat or simple carb without fiber I feel gross. Not sick like the bypassers, but it's unpleasant enough that when I get offered birthday cake at a party, I'm super careful to keep it extra tiny. 200 calories of sugary crap, I can enjoy once in a while on a special occasion. Any more, and I just want a glass of water and to lie down for half an hour. Have you considered the sleeve? It is much more forgiving with small amounts of really naughty stuff. Also, I have never vomited since being sleeved. I don't think it's impossible, but I have not had the need to.

Woot! Best wishes on the road ahead:) Yay healthier you!

I was slow but steady. Hard to be patient when everyone else seems to be losing so fast. Stay the course....you're doing fine. Don't count your success as numbers on the scale. Count it in days you've followed your plan and how well you've followed your plan. Eventually, the numbers on the scale show that effort, I promise.

The deadly nighttime munchies. I feel your pain. You're probably not far enough out yet to do this comfortably, but one of my strategies for dealing with the nightime munchies is having veggies on the couch. LOL. The only foods we allow to be eaten in front of the TV are vegetables, now. And I can put together a great plate of them....pepper sticks, baby carrots, sweet tomatoes, crunchy flavorful stuff and I even have a homemade ginger balsamic dressing that is super low calorie to dip. For me, this really helps with the nighttime cravings. But I totally get where you're coming from...it's almost like your body waits until your brain is tired and vulnerable to suggest....hey, by the way, lets eat something really naughty! It's totally frustrating. Been there! Another strategy that helps me...is switching to a different comfort habit. I LOVE a hot deep bath. When I want food at night, I try to take a bath instead and make it even more decadent with a 60 calorie sugar free chocolate pudding (while swearing off other snacks for the night). At the end of the day is when we need that extra nurturing, that extra love and comfort....it's been a HARD day! Try to find that nurturing and comfort in something that takes the focus off food. Try to find other things to do at night that are satisfying and make you feel warm and fuzzy.

For me, nothing is off limits or forbidden. To me...that is giving food WAY too much power. That said, I've had to be really mindful about eating some things. Really sugary, refined flour stuff...like birthday cake or a fancy desert....if I want to eat it, I've gotta do the work to figure out what a 200 calorie serving is. If I eat much more than 200 calories of sugary refined stuff it's no longer a treat...it's super unpleasant. I don't puke or anything, I just feel kinda gross and unwell for half an hour. But hey....a little teenie piece of cake, a midget scoop of ice cream, a piece of a favorite donut, a small serving of a "mom desert"....is workable and enjoyable when it's a rare treat and the amount is reasonable. (rich stuff might only be a couple of bites) Rather than having forbidden foods...I have foods that I need a 24 hour waiting period on. LOL. Some foods, I refuse to eat on impulse or short notice anymore. But if I have time to plan for them in my whole day's nutrition and can plan out a reasonable portion....nothing is ever off limits. I'll also run cycles of four weeks with zero junk food, then one week with limited junk as desired. That way....if I want something bad enough to wait a couple of weeks for it...I can have anything I want. Off limits = food wins. I want to win. I want to control food, not have food control me. Stuff I have to be careful of: My beloved corn on the cob. Too much corn no the cob can still cause my banana stomach to feel stuck. I still eat it...cause I love it....but I make sure to eat bites of other things between small bites of corn to keep it from packing up. I do find that I like a lot of my old favorites less. Sugary stuff is wonderful for about the first three bites....then I'm done. Have learned through experience to enjoy a few bites and not push my luck. Several old favorites don't taste the same to me or satisfy the same way. Sometimes it's liberating to try old favorites and find out the appeal isn't there anymore. Lot of things are off my naughty list purely because they don't taste as good as my memory of them.

I love my bariatric therapist. She's a HUGE part of working this life change (for me, anywho) and has been absolutely indispensible to finding a new normal that isn't extreme. There's a lot of lifescript to rewrite...to get this food addiction thing worked out in my case. Like all relationships....part of the relationship is listening and compromise. I listen to food and my body and try to make sensible compromises now. My big thing has been getting away from the extreme thinking where food is concerned. I tend to go....to hell with it, I'll eat whatever I want OR I must control and document every micronutrient and be PERFECT! For years, there was no inbetween and there was no winning. Making peace...learning to really be accountable, but reasonable....has been the biggest part of the work for me. Therapy has helped with this bigtime.

My husband misses my ginormous boobs. My back does not.

Meh, to each their own. But I'm tired of lying. These surgeries fix our stomachs, not our heads. Our heads will never be well if we keep lying. And we are CHAMPION liars about food and hunger (and fitness and body image, etc.) We're also prone to extreme thinking. If it's not one extreme it's the other. I want something truthful that is moderate and sane and not so EXTREME all the time. 1000 calories a day indefinately...is eventually called an eating disorder. We can't avoid food. We need to make peace with it and be honest about it. If we've been lying about food and hunger to ourselves, we are much more at risk of regaining or developing an eating disorder in the other direction or another addiction.....which does happen. I'm personally not interested in an eating disorder. I'm not interested in being someone who stands in the sun and believes the energy is flowing into me. LOLOLOLOL. I have no interest in the nonsense of "skinny, perfect, beautiful". I like how I look, and I always have. Even when I was 270 pounds. I want to be someone who is an average weight for a woman my age...who feels strong and healthy and has excellent labs and no medications. I want a long healthy life. I want to stop the weight obsession/identity/cycle of madness. I want to be someone who relates to food in a normal way. Someone who can enjoy everything in moderation who has the self control to stop and self regulate. Someone who doesn't think about food every minute of the day. And I think my chances of getting there are a hell of a lot better if I'm honest. So does my bariatric therapist. I am nearly 50, and I'm just getting this figured out after a lifetime of diets and extreme thinking. I love my moderate, normal weight.... and my moderate normal eating habits.... and my moderate normal fitness. Here's a current pic of me. Not perfect. Moderate. Normal. But exactly who I want to be:) And yep...this chick gets HUNGRY when she's not eating 1400-1600 calories a day:)

I'm a purist. Just the plain chocolate is my favorite. 80 calories of pure bliss. 6g of protien. Bold admission....on more than one occasion when I've had a bout of "feeling sad and need comfort" (the kind of day I used to really screw up and eat all sorts of junk) I've been know to eat two Yasso bars instead of a meal in a hot bath. LOL. 160 calories and 12g of protien isn't so bad. And that way, when I have a high fiber english muffin with peanut butter later (200 calories, 7g protien, 9g dietary fiber..lol)....I'm still in budget and my nutrition isn't that terrible. Yasso bars are absolutely one of my favorite "comfort food" replacements. That list includes peanut butter on whole grain english muffins, blueberry protien pancakes, and homemade chicken soup. I still have emotional melt down days, but I feed them smarter now:) (Love the mint chocolate chip and the butter pecan is amazing.)

They are an absolute favorite of mine, too:)

1200 calories, 60g protien.

It's not "one size fits all". Discuss this with your nutritionist or doctor. Factors that effect the number of calories you should consume: your weight loss goals, your height, frame size, gender and activity level.

Call your doctor, ask him/her to prepare written instructions and either have it emailed to you or go pick it up.

Here's a question. If you're stressing and panicking over being stuck and doing everything humanly possible to set your diet to a complex level of restriction....how will you feel when you actually DO reach your goal? You will. Then you'll be faced with how many of these restrictions you can live with long term and the resulting weight fluctuations of adjusting them. You're kinda setting yourself up for an unsustainable emotional rollercoaster, IMO. My advice: slow and steady wins the race. Make good choices you can live with. It's not all about the number. It's about adapting to healthier eating you can live with and reinforcing those habits. Make them livable, or they'll burn you out. Stuff that cause your weight to be wonky.... different amounts of carbs in your diet causing saved glucose in your liver. Heavy exercise depleting your glucose in your liver causing you to lose a ton of water.....then a week later the water and glucose is replaced. A bad battery in your scale. Crappy sleep. Temperatures that make you retain water more and less. Soooo many things. Don't be a slave to the scale. Find new good habits that work and just be patient. You've got this. You will eventually lose again if you don't freak yourself out so much that you do something crazy. LOL. Wishing you the best.

Some of us eat a ton of grains and carbs for maintenance. LOL. I do. I eat a lot of plant protein. I don't eat refined carbs much anymore...no sugar or white flour in my normal diet. But I do eat oats, potatoes, beans, chickpeas on a daily basis. Some people do really well with a keto approach to weight loss, some are more like me. You'll find lots of both in the weight loss surgery crowd:) Like most things in life....one size fits all....is pretty much a falsehood. Whichever road you take, wishing you terrific success and great health:)