Cheryl Ann

Although I realize that 51 lbs. in 5 3/4 months is decent weight loss, and despite the fact that I feel thinner, I finally took a "during" photo -- and can now see why my weight loss isn't apparent to others...because it actually isn't all that apparent. Yes, the spare tire is reduced substantially, but the rest of me doesn't seem to have caught up! I've dropped three sizes, but I guess when you're still fat, you're still fat, lol. I've never posted any photos of myself before, but here are my "before" and "during" photos. Very disappointing.

My surgeon is also Dr. Ren, but I went for a visit this morning (had a fill), and saw Dr. Schwack. Found him to be so warm, personable and funny! I really liked him.

A couple of weeks ago, I posted about having felt like a failure because in the three years since I was banded, I only managed to lose 60 pounds out of the 100 or so I actually needed to lose in order to make goal. (See liquids for a couple of weeks preceding my appointment today at NYU, and the symptoms largely subsided. I also managed to lose about 6 lbs -- a nice bonus, and proof that you CAN lose again after having not lost weight for a period of time. I had the esophagram this morning, followed by a visit to the office. It turned out that my band hadn't slipped -- but that I was extraordinarily tight. I had suffered needlessly for all that time when all I needed was to get off my lazy ass and go for an adjustment. I was at 6.2cc in a 10cc band. 0.5cc were removed, and the difference is amazing. It turns out that I am only 5 lbs. above what I was last time I was in the office (June of 2009), and was told that losing should actually be a lot easier now that I'm looser. Sounds contradictory, but it does make sense. I was compensating for my difficulties with eating by ingesting foods and liquids that went down more easily -- and also ate/drank more frequently. Now that I should be having an easier time with food, I should be able to eat more sensibly and, more importantly, keep it down. I feel like I just dodged a bullet. This was most definitely my lucky day -- St. Paddy's Day!

Now I'm finding that the band is too loose; I guess I will need to fine-tune things. It actually makes me nervous, not having enough restriction. Too much is no good, but too little is downright scary to me. The loss of control looms.

You know, I never thought of it that way -- that I have successfully kept weight off -- because I figured the band really does the lion's share of the work. But now that you pointed out that in almost two years of what turned out to be an overfill I'm only 5 lbs. over, I guess I should feel pretty good about it. But still, without the band even that would not have been possible. Although I would still like to lose a lot more, just having lost what I have is not only weight that I wouldn't have lost without the band (optimally-adjusted or not), but I can't help but think how much heavier I would be above and beyond what I was when I was first banded. The weight just kept on piling on -- there was no leveling off in sight. So to even be what I am now is an incredible thing. Still, I'm going to go forward and try to continue losing again. And if I feel I need an adjustment again, this time I won't wait so long!

I was banded on April 7, 2008 -- almost three years ago -- and went from around 250+ pounds to around 190. That in itself isn't exactly an entirely successful weight loss story, largely because I've never quite learned to eat slowly as I should, nor have I been able to keep away from sweets entirely (although lately I've been better). In the past several year or so, my weight has creeped up to around 201. I haven't been back to see my surgeon in more than a year and a half; I've been too ashamed, and frankly am afraid I will be a disappointment to her. I now have a visit scheduled for next week -- along with an esophogram, for which I am also long overdue. The reason I finally called for an appointment and esophogram is that I'm afraid my band may have slipped. Although it doesn't happen every night, some nights I cough constantly, spitting up Fluid onto my pillow. Other nights, I seem to "foam" constantly, requiring that I run to the bathroom to spit. Other nights -- like last night -- I've had no problem whatsoever. I was given a gift -- a new start that so many people would give anything to have -- and didn't make full use of it as I should have. If it turns out the band hasn't slipped, can I still lose weight if I try, even at this stage of the game (three years later)? If it has, does it have to be removed? Even though I have not lost all the weight I had intended, I can't say that I'm entirely unhappy; after all, I'm still considerably thinner than I was three years ago, even with the recent weight gain (which seems to have leveled off). I feel like such a failure, because I am.

Thank you all so very, very much. All your words are truly words to live by. I think my biggest mistake was not staying here on the boards -- if even to lurk -- because by keeping my distance I lost my sole source of support. Of course, my husband and kids are encouraging enough, but there's nothing like others who have been there. I will definitely be "hanging around" here, even if I don't post all that often. I will definitely update you all on my esophogram and visit at NYU next week. Again, thanks SO much!

I've been on liquid and soft foods for the past week or so...have lost about three pounds in the meantime, which is encouraging. What has puzzled me for a long time is that (prior to this possible slip) I was at times unable to keep even liquids down, and yet at other times able to eat a solid meal with no issues whatsoever -- even more than what I thought I'd be capable of. Usually, my inability to keep down food happens at home -- the kids running around a fighting, etc. -- and my ability to enjoy an entire meal without having to run to the bathroom at a restaurant with other people. I suppose tension plays a role (as well as time of day, definitely). I just hope my band hasn't slipped. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

My surgery was two weeks ago, and I'm feeling great. However, when I stand or sit, I can feel (with my hand) a large lump-like mass under my port scar. Since the port is not directly under the skin, what is this I am feeling? Is it normal? It is painless to the touch, by the way. Also, my stomach protrudes a bit in that area. Has anyone else experienced this?

Just found out perhaps 10 minutes ago that my surgery -- scheduled for Monday -- has been approved! Talk about down to the wire! Of course, now I really need some hand-holding, lol! Wow...I can't believe it. Whew!

I'm terrible at remembering to take Vitamins (I think it's because I have five pills to take every morning to begin with, and somehow manage to "forget" the vitamin), but was repulsed at the taste of children's chewables. Now I know why I found a hidden cache of tossed vitamins in the bottom of my son's closet, lol! They really are awful! I haven't found a single brand I could stomach. Today I went and bought Centrum Silver in Mixed berry flavor. When I opened the jar and saw the actual size of these things, I blanched at the thought of having to chew something that size that just might taste no better than Flintstones did. Boy, was I ever wrong! I wouldn't go so far as to say that they're delicious, but they are most definitely easily palatable. No "lemon face" for me! What a pleasant suprise that was. I'm hoping this run-down feeling I have will soon be in the past, because I'm sure I've been needing more nutrients in my diet these days.

Just got back from seeing Dr. Ren in the city, and am now officially in Onederland! Actually, I hit it a couple of weeks ago, but like to see things kind of "settle in" before I spread the news. It's been 8 months since my surgery, and I am down 55 lbs. Honestly, I had hoped I would have been down a whole lot more at this point, but I'll take it! 51 lbs. to go! It's clear that I won't reach it within the first year after surgery, but I do hope it's possible within the 1.5 years...which would be 10 months from now. Has it taken anyone that long to reach goal? Is it possible to still reach goal after that one year "window of opprtunity" has passed? I sure hope so!

Thanks so much for all the encouragement. Actually, the scale is moving again, largely due to the "jump start" of having a fill and needing to do liquids and mushies for a few days. I have found that being "forced" into doing this helps me in a couple of ways: 1.) Even if it's largely Water loss, just seeing any loss on the scale is encouraging and gets me motivated, and 2.) Water loss or not, just shifting gears by having to do liquids and mushies veers me away from not-so-good choices. Of course, I can't have a fill every month for the rest of my life, so I really need to be able to "shift gears" on my own! I guess it's all part of the learning process.

I just had my checkup on Friday...my weight hasn't budged for about six weeks, so I had a slight fill (from 5.8 up to 6.0)...hopefully, the scale will start moving soon. I guess I really shouldn't be focusing on how I look (or imagine I look), as much as how I feel -- which is SO much better than I have in a long time. Although I'm still not quite closing in on my goal, I guess I've done pretty good so far, and just need to be more patient. After all, I didn't go from 147 to 252 in a matter of months (although it didn't take all that long, relatively, lol!), but I sure have lost more in the past several months than I have at any point previously. You guys are THE BEST!

Thanks, Jonathan -- I will check those out! Jonathan -- and anyone else who might have some experience with a plateau -- did you experience being stuck at the same weight for a while? For more than a month, I keep wavering at around 201-202, sometimes higher, but never lower -- and it's driving me crazy!!! I have become convinced that I will never lose those 50+ additional pounds. I've also read that if one doesn't lose all their weight in the first year (and my first year comes up in the beginning of April), that you can pretty much expect that it isn't going to happen. :biggrin:

I guess what I find disappointing is not that I don;t look as if I've lost weight -- I do -- but that it sure doesn't look like 51 lbs. But you guys are great; you really helped put this in perspective for me. My shirts are still the old ones, which doesn't help. And yes, the idea that the next 51 lbs. will be the ones that really show makes a lot of sense to me now, because the last time I experienced substantial weight loss was after the birth of my second child, when I went from 223 lbs. at his birth, down to 195 lbs. afterward...and then dropped down to 147/148 or so in the next year -- and the difference was staggering. Again, thanks so much -- and I hope that in a few months from now, I'll be posting a photo that shows just that.

Okay -- I think I've got it -- click to enlarge!

I copied them to my Flickr account and inserted the url, but it doesn't seem to be working. Is there any way for me to load them directly from my computer file?

It's always fun to "meet" someone who shares the same stats! Kudos to you for going to the gym; I'm so darn lazy, that I'll drive to the corner mailbox, lol! Well, not really THAT lazy, but you get the picture. I have the 10cc APS band, with filled with 5.9 cc. I am definitely restricted. I would imagine that at some point I will need another fill (and maybe more), but for now it's great!

Saw Dr. Ren today, and found that I have lost 8 more pounds in the past four weeks. Restriction is good. and the weight loss is steady, so no fill this time (I believe I'm at 5.9 cc). Can't believe I'm down 48 lbs!

I'm having a heck of a time lately with my medications. My birth control and hypertension pills aren't much of a problem (they're pretty tiny, and the bc pill is even chewable), but the Prozac! I've just been upped from 30mg. to 40 mg., and while I thought swallowing three 10 mg. capsules was a pain in the neck, it turned out to have been easy compared with the single 40 mg. capsule. I don't know what I was thinking, but I somehow imagined that this one capsule would be the same size as a single 10 mg. Wrong! It's much bigger. I think I will need to change my morning routine a bit, and keep these downstairs in the kitchen, to have after I've been awake for a while. Although I have been swallowing my pills with warm Water in the morning, taking them right after I get up -- which has always been a good time for me, in terms of remembering to take them -- I think I will have to get used to a different routine. This morning I was hit with a horrific wave of nausea. It was the Prozac dissolving in my esophagus and coming back up into my throat. I didn't just PB; I vomited violently and repeatedly. It was awful. I felt bad for my kids having to witness that.

I have to admit that sitting down to an actual meal feels more like a chore to me these days, so I guess my diet is more like one meal, and the rest Snacks. I eat Cookies once in a while, but definitely like popcorn and have it frequently. I also eat nuts, rice pudding and -- yes -- even ice cream. However, ice cream is something I only care for once in a while in the hotter months, and never otherwise. As of yesterday, five months after my surgery, I'm down 48 lbs. (and showed two more down on the scale this morning). I may not be doing great in terms of nutrition, but I'm definitely losing. I guess it all comes down to total calories consumed/expended.

I don't have a sample, since it was submitted through my surgeon's office. However, my chart notes all those co-morbidities and weight-related conditions, so I am pretty sure that information went into the letter and forms submitted on my behalf.

I got on the scale this morning...and am down another 2 lbs., for a total of 50! However, I like to wait a while before I make it "official" because I've found that whenever I have a sudden drop like that, it fluctuates up and down a couple of pounds until it finally settles down. I really do need to get my sorry ass moving. I find every excuse in the world, but fact is, I'm a stay-at-home mom with two kids in school all day (and don't even clean my own house), so have all the time in the world. My problem is that I'm rather reclusive, and like being in my house a wee bit too much -- but obviously not while on a treadmill!